Will & Patrick Wake Up Married (14 page)

She cocks her head. “Wait, what did you say your first name was?”

“I didn’t.” She looks unimpressed, and he sighs. “Patrick.”

“Oh my God!” Jenny nearly shouts, drawing the attention of the patrons lined up at the counter. “You’re Will Patterson’s new husband! I thought you might be when we met over at the counter!” She grips his arm and shakes him, causing him to spill a little of his precious latte onto his navy button-up shirt. “I’ve heard all about you!”

Of course she has. News of his marriage to Will is probably burning up
The Hurting Times
server by now.

She points at his half of the jam doughnut. “Are you going to eat that or not?”

He thrusts the jam doughnut into his mouth, mind spinning, trying to figure out what he’s supposed to say now. He should probably get up and go, but maybe that would be suspicious. He glances toward a man tucked in a corner ostensibly reading a paper. He has a dark complexion and is wearing a business suit and glancing at him from around his paper occasionally. Is Patrick paranoid to think it might be a Molinaro spy? Probably. But it’s better to be safe than dead in a YMCA pool.

“What have you heard?” he asks Jenny.

“Not a lot. My niece Beth told me all about how you and Will checked into the Tallgrass last night. You’re just like she described.”

“And how’s that?”

“Delightfully jerky.” She smacks his arm and laughs. “How do you think? Handsome. Inappropriate. Grouchy. Pretty much exactly how you are!”

Patrick nods. If she’d said anything else, he’d have to hate her. But as it is, she’s honest at least. Honesty is a quality Patrick likes. Give him a bitter pill if the situation demands it, but don’t tell him it’s chocolate.

“So, how did you meet Will?”

“How did
you
meet Will?”

She cackles. “I babysat his little butt when he was just a kid. Well, that’s not entirely accurate. I mainly I took care of Caitlin and Olivia. Will was pretty self-sufficient by that time, and I’d outgrown babysitting before Connor came along and Will was plenty old enough to watch the kids himself.”

“So you didn’t change his diapers?”

“Nah. He’s only six years younger than me.” She gazes off. “I think he was ten when I first came over to the house to watch the girls.” She meets his eye again. “But it’s Healing. Everyone knows everyone just like their own brother or sister. It’s downright incestuous at times.” She squeezes his forearm. “Come on, tell me things. Was it love at first sight? Give me all the juicy details!”

Patrick’s certain no matter what he says now Will won’t be happy. So he just goes all in. “I met him in a bar.”

“Was he drinking?” Her concern is palpable.

“Not really,” Patrick fibs. “The lights in the bar weren’t so great. It was hard to see in there, but I thought he was the most handsome man I’d seen in a long time.” That’s still the truth even in broad daylight. His gut flutters and twists again.

“And?”

“I seduced him.”

Jenny lets out a little happy sound.

“Don’t tell Will I said that. He’s embarrassed by how easily he fell for me.”

“Will can be impulsive,” Jenny says, and she doesn’t sound entirely approving. “But this is
really
impulsive even for him.”

“Well, don’t be too hard on him.” Patrick puffs out his chest. “I can be quite persuasive.”

She giggles. “Right. It was your glorious grouchy charm that won him over.”

Patrick shrugs. “Whatever it was, he was into me too.”

“Uh-huh.” Jenny smirks.

“And the sex was, without a doubt, hands down the best I’ve ever had.” He has to admit if Will gives it up again soon, this entire detour to frozen middle America won’t seem like such a waste. “I came like dynamite every time.”

She smiles with a fevered giddiness. “I understand completely. Sex like that can make anyone act impulsively.”

Patrick knows most people don’t talk about these things like this. They don’t candidly break into a discussion of orgasms and screwing on the first date, but he doesn’t care. He’s always sucked at appropriate chitchat and prefers to get to the gritty truth of things. Besides, Patrick likes Jenny. She’s not running screaming away from him at any rate. And she’s not slapping his face or scolding him. She’s holding her own.

She checks to make sure Dylan is still sleeping. “Did he…feel the same way?”

“He was putty in my hands when I was done with him.”

“I knew he needed someone more passionate than Ryan. That’s his ex.” She looks a little embarrassed to have brought him up.

“I know.”

“Ryan’s always been such a cold fish.” She sighs. “I shouldn’t talk about him like that. But they never clicked, despite being together so long. I’m glad Will came to his senses, no matter what inspired it.”

“You don’t think he’s made a mistake marrying someone he’s just met?”

“Maybe. It’s all pretty fast, isn’t it? But sometimes things just happen. That’s how it was with Dylan’s dad. We slept together on the first date and I just
knew
. I would have married him immediately, right there in his bed still shaking from how good we were together. It was perfect. We were perfect.”

Ding, ding, ding.
Jenny wins at the real, honest, and dirty award. She’s his favorite kind of person.

“That’s how Will felt,” Patrick says, oddly wishing it was true.

She goes all dreamy for a moment, but then she clears her throat and frowns. “Hopefully you and Will last longer than me and Tom. He’s been long gone since the day I found out I was pregnant. Packed his bags that night and skipped town. I haven’t heard from him since.” She shrugs. “But that’s just how life is, right?”

“Not really, no.”

“Excuse me?”

“Life had nothing to do with it. He was a dick. End of story.”

She seems to take a few seconds to decide if she’s going to be offended. “True.” She flips her ponytail over her shoulder and leans down to touch Dylan’s sleeping face. “Well, I got a beautiful boy out of what I had with him. I guess that’s better than nothing.”

“I don’t really do ‘looking at the bright side.’ I prefer bald truth.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that, actually. Being positive all the time gets tiring. Sometimes being a single mom just sucks.”

“That’s more like it. It sucks and you sometimes hate it.”

She smiles and glances around to make sure no one is listening. “Sometimes I do hate it. It’s true. But I never hate
Dylan
.”

He nods at the kid. “He’s cute at least. It’d be even harder if he was ugly.”

Jenny laughs again. “Yeah, I guess it would be.”

“That’s as positive as I get.”

She sips her coffee and they’re silent for a few seconds. “So, go on. What happened next? You know, after you seduced Will?” She props her chin on her hands and stares at him avidly.

Yes, it’s clear that the people in this town live on gossip as much as on air and food. “Well, after I came my brains out six times—”

“Six!”

“Yeah. After that, I had to take a break from screwing him for a few hours. It was long enough to realize he’s a pretty awesome guy.” Another truth, but not one Patrick’s very happy about.

“So you married him.”

“I married him.”

He’s fudging the timeline and the details, but what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. It’s better if the story is more believable than the insanity that actually went down. He doesn’t want to embarrass Will by admitting they were both drunk. And he doesn’t want to embarrass himself by admitting he married Will before they even had sex. Everyone knows you should test drive before buying. His idiocy doesn’t need to be part of the town’s gossip.

“To be crass—”

“Oh, yes, be crass.”

“It was love at first fuck.”

“Patrick?”

“Yes?”

Jenny smiles and squeezes his hand, which he should hate, but somehow doesn’t. “You and I are gonna be good friends.”

Terrific. Just what he needs.
 

Chapter Seven
 

Patrick’s alone and on his third latte when Will runs into Brown Gargle, screeching to a halt by the table.

“Yes, dear?”

“You’re an awful person.” Will scowls.

“I get that a lot.”

Arms akimbo, Will’s the picture of domestic irritation.
Aw, my angry little wife.
Well, big wife. Will is quite a bit taller than him after all. “I thought you were going to wait at the hotel.”

Patrick shrugs. He never promised anything. “I got bored. And hungry. Thought I’d take a walk.” He licks the end of his finger to dab up the last crumbs of a gingerbread snowman he’s only just polished off. He pops his finger in his mouth. Will grimaces.

Collapsing into the chair only recently vacated by Jenny, Will stares at him. “What did you do exactly? Who did you talk to? What did you say?”

“Well, first I spread evil rumors about you at the hotel, telling everyone I saw in the lobby that you’re a snorer and a rude sleep-groper.” That’s not true, but Will looks suitably annoyed. Patrick pats his shopping bags by his feet. “Then I stopped by the sporting goods place to buy a few things to survive your hellish weather.”

“Hey, at least it’s not North Dakota. It’s two degrees colder up there.”

“Oh, two whole degrees.”

“Believe me. It makes all the difference.”

“Then I stopped in here, lured by the promise of coffee, and ended up raising some hell.”

Jax, wiping down a table next to theirs, snorts and shakes his head before heading back to the counter to take another order from the dark guy who’s been hanging out with his newspaper.

“What did you do?”

“Got in a fight with your former babysitter Jenny.”

“Jenny Burger?”

“Her last name’s Burger? Don’t tell me that’s a traditional Lakota name too.”

“She’s German. I think. I don’t know. Her ancestors have been here longer than mine.” Will rubs his forehead like he’s getting a headache. “So you met Jenny?”

“We fought over a doughnut, finally agreed to split it, and had a little talk.”

“No! She’s a huge gossip!”

“So? I only said good things about you.”

“Like what?”

“Like you know exactly what to do with your asshole to make a guy blow his load in seconds.”

Will gasps.

“Take a joke, Will. Of course I didn’t say that! I just told her we were happy and in love. The way we planned.”

“I can’t believe you!”

“Why? Don’t you want her to tell the whole town that our sexual chemistry sets the world on fire and that I love you like breathing? Isn’t that…” He glances toward Jax and whispers, “What we want?”

Will shifts in his chair uncomfortably. “Yeah, I guess so.”

Patrick shrugs. “By the way, Jax makes a good latte.”

Will glances toward the tall, warm man behind the counter and gives a nod. Jax nods back.

“I had a nice time with Jenny, thanks for asking.”

“You could have left me a note. I’ve been looking all over for you.” There’s residual panic to his tone and Patrick realizes that Will thought he might’ve skipped town.

“Never fear. I’ll always be just a phone call away,
honey
.” He waves his phone at Will.

Will grits his teeth. “I don’t have your cell phone number,
darling
.”

“Oh, yes, we skipped the exchange of numbers and went straight to bed, didn’t we?”

Will attempts a smile but just ends up grimacing instead.

Patrick tosses him the phone. “Text yourself, my sweet little puddin’-pop.”

Will does and Patrick enjoys another sip of latte. “So? How’d things go with your granny?”

“Let’s talk about it later.” Will glances toward the customer Jax is making a drink for and frowns.

“We can keep our voices down.”

Will shakes his head. “No. I don’t think so.” He whispers, “I don’t know him. He’s a stranger. He looks Molinaro to me.”

Patrick’s eyes feel like they might bug out of his head. “Great. Are you kidding me?”

Will examines the man closely.

“I have a wonderful idea. Let’s go home and make love,” Patrick says loudly for the benefit of the man going back to his table with a foamy latte. If they’re really being spied on, let the man send
that
report home to Will’s creepy mafia family. “I miss your tight butt on my huge dick, babe.”

Will gapes and flails. “Shh! What are you—” His cheeks turn fiery red and he hisses, “Stop humiliating me!”

“I’m being a loving husband!”

Will shakes his head, eyes wide. “You’re being gross! Can you at least please try to act, I don’t know, charming? Please?”