Witch Twins and the Ghost of Glenn Bly (4 page)

“You are?” asked Daphne.

“No, ye are not! And I have had enough of you, you impertinent, identical witch twins!” grumbled Percival. “I am off. Heigh-ho, Duncan!” With that, Percival tapped his horse’s flanks and, turning from the bridge, lightly spurred him off.

“Wait!” Claire picked up her reins and clicked Dooley into a gallop. She clattered over the bridge in quick pursuit of the ghost.

“Claire!” yelled Daphne. “Where are you going?” She started to give chase.

“Daphne,
n-o-o-o!
Mac said you had to stay with me and Paloma!” cried Luna. “I don’t want to be all alone on the bridge at the mercy of this wild horse.”

“Oh, brother!” exclaimed Daphne. “Paloma is about as wild as a bowl of soup.” But she turned her horse to stay with Luna.

Good, thought Claire. She needed to speak to the ghost knight in private. “Wait up, Percival!” she cried as she caught up to his side.

“Go away, thou witch,” said Percival.

“I’m sorry,” said Claire. “I didn’t mean to laugh at your haunting.”

“Contrary to what thou mightest think,” said Percival stiffly, “I have been rather good at haunting the castle till now. I even got a nice mention in the
Spookiest Scottish Castles Tour Guide Book.
” He shrugged. “Alas, witches must be harder to scare. Of which clan art thou?”

“Bramblewine.”

The knight crooked his eyebrow. “Art thou up to mischief? The Bramblewine witches are famous for their four-star pranks.”

“I’m not up to four stars yet,” Claire admitted. Then she quickly changed the subject. “Percival, why are you haunting Glenn Bly?” she asked. “I mean, a ghost can’t be good for a bed-and-breakfast. There’s even a sign posted out front that says ‘Glenn Bly Welcomes You.’ How can guests feel welcome if they’re also being haunted?”

Sir Percival seemed to think about that. “My knightly duty is to protect Glenn Bly as best I can,” he said. “The castle is in danger. That is all I know. Now I must be off. Next time, witch girl, thou ought to act more scared, even if it is only pretend. ’Tis rude to laugh at a ghost.”

With that, he vanished into the mist.

Claire watched him with envy. In her Little Book of Shadows, Vanishing into Mist was a four-star-level spell.

She trotted back to the others.

“American Claire, do you always run off to have conversations with yourself?” asked Daphne as they wound the horses back toward the castle.

“Not always. But sometimes,” Claire answered honestly.

“Well, it’s very rude,” said Daphne.

Claire did not answer. She was getting used to people telling her she was rude.

As they came closer to the castle, Daphne slowed T.J. to a stop. The reins went slack in her hands.

“Oh, no,” she breathed.

“Oh, no, who?” asked Luna.

“Oh, no, where?” asked Claire.

“Oh, no,
that
.” Daphne pointed. “That big, silver car in the middle of the front lawn. The notorious Rolls-Royce.”

Now both twins caught sight of the large luxury car parked smack in the middle of the castle’s front lawn.

“Whose notorious silver Rolls-Royce?” asked Claire.

Claire saw that Daphne’s face had become rather pale. “The notorious silver Rolls-Royce of Lord and Lady Shrillingbird,” said Daphne. “The dreadful owners of Glenn Bly.”

A
CCORDING TO DAPHNE, LORD
and Lady Shrillingbird were the pickiest, grouchiest, complaining-est couple in all of Scotland. Flowers sagged and soufflés flopped in their presence. Cats growled. Dogs hid. Nothing was ever good enough for the Shrillingbirds. They hated everything.

Especially things that matched or came in pairs.

“That’s why I expect they’ll hate twins most of all. So when they’re mean to you, don’t pay them any mind,” Daphne warned after she, Luna, and Claire had unsaddled, watered, and brushed down the horses before heading from the stables toward the castle.

“Okay, but why are they here in the first place?” asked Luna. She was already nervous about meeting the Shrillingbirds. Her tablecloth skirt had become a little bit muddy during the riding, and her face was slightly sweaty.

“Because they know my grandfather will serve them a free lunch,” Daphne explained. “Even though they’ve got heaps of pounds, they’re too cheap to go to a restaurant.”

Luna nodded knowledgeably. She knew that a Scottish
pound
meant money. It was similar to an American dollar. What Daphne meant by
heaps of pounds
was not that the Shrillingbirds were super-fatties, but super-rich.

“Chin up,” said Daphne as they marched through the castle doors.

But poor Daphne seemed less like her normal self, Luna thought. From the moment she’d caught sight of the silver Rolls-Royce, her sly good humor had disappeared. Now her chin was up and her eyes looked bright and blinky as if she might even cry.

The Shrillingbirds were seated in the grand dining hall, at a table that could have served twenty people on one side and twenty people on the other. Lord Shrillingbird sat at the foot, carefully eating a steak with a fork and knife. Lady Shrillingbird sat at the head, sloppily drinking broth from a bowl. Some of the broth was running down her chin.

Mac was serving them lunch. His face was rosy from so many trips up and down, up and down, from one end of the table and back again. The Shrillingbirds did not seem to notice.

“More lemonade,” shrilled Lady Shrillingbird.

“Pass the salt,” shrilled Lord Shrillingbird.

“Right-o,” wheezed Mac. “Hullo, girls. Daphne, would you be a love and help me serve the toffee cake for Lady S, and the plum pudding for Lord S?”

“Certainly, Grandpop,” said Daphne, and she followed Mac into the kitchen, leaving the twins alone with the Shrillingbirds.

Luna looked the Shrillingbirds up and down, then down and up.

Lady Shrillingbird was very, very red and square as a small brick.

Lord Shrillingbird was very, very gray and round as a large stone.

Both of them had been preoccupied with their lunches, but as soon as both Shrillingbirds caught sight of Luna and Claire, they let out identical screams.

“Ew! Disgusting! Twins!” they cried in unison. Then they glared across the table at each other.

“My lord, don’t copy what I say,” said Lady Shrillingbird.

“In this instance, my lady, you copied what I said,” said Lord Shrillingbird.

Lady Shrillingbird sniffed. “We hate anything that comes in pairs or matched sets,” she told Luna. “Especially matching bedside table lamps, or matched socks, or matched earrings. Get it? No match.” She shook her head, so that Luna could see she wore a diamond stud earring in one ear, and a swinging plastic yellow daisy earring in the other ear.

“Get it? No match.” Lord Shrillingbird flutter-kicked his feet out from under the table. He was wearing one red polka-dotted sock, and one flowered sock with a ruffle.

“We also hate rhymes,” continued Lady Shrillingbird. “Because a rhyme is a word match. But matching
people
are worst of all. Do your names rhyme, you repulsive twins?”

“I’m Luna,” said Luna.

“And I’m Tuna,” said Claire.

The Shrillingbirds gaped in horror. Luna cut a look at her sister, who wrinkled her nose witchishly.

Daphne and Mac swung out of the kitchen. Daphne shoved a plate of toffee cake in front of Lady Shrillingbird, while Mac served Lord Shrillingbird his plum pudding.

“Overall, my lunch was too tough and bitter,” announced Lady Shrillingbird.

“Specifically, my steak was mushy, had too many hot spices, and left an aftertaste that coated my tongue as if I’d been licking mold,” said Lord Shrillingbird.

“I’m sorry about your lunches,” stammered Mac.

“Luckily, we’re staying through the weekend,” said Lady Shrillingbird. “So we shall allow you to prepare more meals. Perhaps you’ll have better luck next time.”

“Through the weekend?” repeated Daphne faintly.

Lord and Lady Shrillingbird ignored her. Lady Shrillingbird turned to her husband. “Now then, my lord, let’s walk around our castle. I’ve got some divine decorating suggestions for when we move in. And after our walk, well have a nap in the Peacock Chamber.”

“Isn’t that our grandparents’ room?” asked Claire.

Lord and Lady Shrillingbird ignored her.

“Be it ever so humble, there’s no place like our second home!” sang Lord Shrillingbird.

The Shrillingbirds gulped their desserts in a couple of bites, then pranced out of the dining room arm in arm, leaving a messy trail of crumbs behind.

“Are the Shrillingbirds planning to move into your castle?” exclaimed Luna.

Mac nodded sadly. “I’m afraid so. I had to sell Glenn Bly to the Shrillingbirds a few years ago because I couldn’t afford the steep castle taxes. Now we run the bed-and-breakfast business and pay them rent. For a while, the situation worked fine. That is, until the Shrillingbirds decided to sell their bungalow in Baja, their salon in Singapore, and their manor in Monte Carlo. Recently, they’ve decided this place would make a nice holiday castle.”

Mac glanced sidelong at his granddaughter. “I never imagined the Shrillingbirds would want to live in a crumbling castle. But they are such unpleasant company, I’m afraid that they would be terribly difficult to share this space with. Daphne and I would most likely have to move.”

Daphne, her chin up, did not answer. Instead, she stacked the Shrillingbirds’ dirty plates and cups and swept out of the dining room without a word. Then came the sound of a giant clattering and bashing as Daphne dumped the dishes in the sink.

“Poor lass,” said Mac. “She has lived through her ups and downs, but Glenn Bly is the only home she’s ever known. Now, girls, leave the cleanup to us. I need to go cheer my granddaughter.”

“Sure, Mac,” said the twins.

Quietly, they stole upstairs to Elderberry Chamber.

“I feel sorry for Daphne,” said Luna. “We’ve lived through our ups and downs, too. But we’ve only lived them in one place, good old Twenty-two Locust Street. And no awful people are looking to crowd us out.”

“It not a crumbling castle with a goofy ghost,” said Claire, “but I love-love-love our home.”

“Even if you can hear Justin practice Hacky Sack through the wall,” Luna mentioned.

“And even if we have to share a room,” Claire added.

“And even if the radiator pipes squeak in the winter.”

“And even if our kittens shredded up the new red-and-green-flowered living room curtains.”

“They did?” Luna cringed.

Claire nodded. “Better not tell Mom. Hey, that reminds me. Let’s see what’s happening at home. Did you bring your spy globe? I forgot mine.”

“I’ve got mine right here.” Luna ran to her suitcase and pulled out her spy globe. It was the size and weight of a glass baseball, and not at all magical looking.

But when Luna shook it, every color appeared and swirled inside it like a liquid rainbow. She fogged the globe with her breath and set it on the windowsill.

“Show us our family,” commanded Luna.

The twins peered into the globe. Soon the fog and colors faded to produce the globe’s first image.

“Hey, it’s Justin. He’s sitting on a bench,” said Luna. “He looks so bored. That’s funny. I thought he was playing football all week.”

“He’s in his uniform, though,” noted Claire. “Maybe he only goes on the field during emergencies. When the team needs someone who can really clobber.”

Next, Claire breathed on the glass to change the image.

“Aw. It’s Mom and Steve eating breakfast and reading the morning paper,” said Luna.

“And Steve is sneak-feeding turkey-bacon scraps to Edie and Hortense,” added Claire. “I’m happy he remembered that kittens need treats.”

“But why are they eating breakfast when we just had lunch?” Luna tapped the globe. “Strange. Is this thing screening reruns?”

“No, dummy. It’s five hours later here. Scotland afternoon time is Pennsylvania breakfast time.”

“Oh, yeah.” Embarrassed, Luna breathed on the glass to change the image once again.

“Aw. It’s Fluffy and Dad strolling Bert through the park,” said Claire.

“And Bert is still bald and he still looks like a toad,” Luna observed. “I hope he fills out soon.”

Together, the twins breathed on the glass.

“Bagpipes and beefsteak, there’s Grandy!” Claire exclaimed.

“She looks really peeved!” Luna drew back.

“Because I am peeved!” thundered a voice behind them.

“Grandy!” The twins turned to see their grandmother standing in the doorway.

“What are you doing back already?” asked Luna.

“Your grandfather and I lost today’s round early. Dead last,” growled Grandy.

“Sorry, Grandy,” said Claire. “Is that why you’re in a bad mood?”

“No. The reason I’m in a bad mood is because I was looking forward to coming home for a nap in
my
room, and what do I find but two ghastly people sleeping in
my
bed!” Grandy scowled. “When your grandfather and I woke them up and tried to shove them off, they threw their pillows at us!”

“Sounds like the Shrillingbirds,” said Claire.

“Grandy, those are the owners of Glenn Bly,” said Luna. “Technically, it’s
their
bed.” She tried to say this nicely, so that her grandmother would not get grumpier.

“By the way, we found the ghost,” said Claire. “His name’s Sir Percival. If you want to cast a spell to make him leave, I don’t think it will matter much. He’s not very spooky.”

“Oh, good work, twins,” said Grandy, her face brightening. “That’s the best news I’ve heard all day! Go get him so I can pop him! And while I’m at it, I might as well get rid of those Squawkingbirds. Your poor grandfather had to go walk in the garden to calm his nerves. Nobody’s ever thrown a pillow at Fred before. It was quite a shock to his system.”

Luna opened her mouth to suggest that perhaps her grandmother should proceed with caution. Now that she’d met Percival, it seemed mean to pop him. Also, getting rid of the Shrillingbirds seemed like it would be hard work. In general, Luna did not think it was a very safe or smart plan to make people vanish just because you could. But she wasn’t sure how to say all this to Grandy.