Witchblood (18 page)

         I mulled it all over, the thoughts swirling round my head so fast it left me feeling dizzy; what if he rejected me? Hated me? The all too familiar rush of emotion started coursing through my body, and my vision went blurry with a build-up of unshed tears. I dug my face into the depths of the sweater, and at the same time I felt Daniel’s heavy arm wrap around my shoulders, pulling me into his side as he perched on the edge of the sofa. My pulse began to slow.

         ‘No Daniel, let her go.’ Eva’s most unwelcome voice broke my concentration as his arm pushed me away slightly. I caught his puzzled expression, but he continued to obey her. Her voice turned authoritative, cold.

         ‘Jess, listen to me. Feel all the sadness. Feel the anger. Look at me Jess,’ she commanded.

         I looked up into her eyes which suddenly seemed hundreds of years old, full of experience and pain. I thought I saw a glimmer of compassion in them and I held onto that as the anger and sadness coursed through my veins, threatening to take hold.

         ‘Now, I want you to look at that mug on the table. Look at it and imagine you are pushing all those emotions out of your body towards that mug. Push them away and store them in the mug, then move the mug away from you. That mug is full of your emotion and worry. Throw it away Jessica, now!’ she instructed me.

         I looked at the mug on the table and instantly understood what she wanted from me. I looked at the mug so hard, but the feelings refused to obey. It felt like thunder brewing as the lights flickered ever so slightly.

         ‘No Jessica, control it. Rein it in and concentrate on the mug; only the mug,’ she repeated.

         Frustration and pain seared through my temples and round the base of my skull. I projected the emotions with all my heart out and into that mug. I felt them waver and come together, then a slight feeling of calm followed as the mug moved a fraction, not even a centimetre, and then chaos descended again. A second later the fuse had blown, the overhead light bulb exploding above our heads, as the feelings rushed back at me and left me panting, the pain almost blinding me.

         ‘Enough Eva, enough!’ Daniel’s arms pulled me toward him again and his voice shushed quietly in my ear, as if he were calming a child with nightmares. I zoned out and concentrated on nothing but his breath on my cheek, as the pain began to subside.

         Thankfully Eva let it drop and once Daniel had re-set the fuse box the TV was switched back on. I huddled into Daniel’s side, not wanting to pull away, and after ten minutes or so the pain had gone and the cocktail of emotions with it. I knew Eva was only trying to help me, but I was a little unnerved by the display of authority, and the look in her eyes. I shifted into a more comfortable position and Eva moved from her usual spot at the end of the sofa to the opposite one, to give us more room. I moved up but felt reluctant to let go of Daniel, and as he seemed happy to keep his arm around my shoulders, I stayed put.

         Around seven o’clock, Eva went upstairs to change into a gorgeous, understated and very sexy outfit, which must have cost a fortune. She then headed out to meet her latest ‘beau’ as she called him, or ‘sex on a stick’ which she described him as. neither of which seemed to work very well together. However, I guess that’s what you get, when you have a woman who grew up in the French Revolution, who’s now slipped seamlessly into the twenty first century. 

         I stayed up with Daniel till past midnight, watching a mixture of weekend TV and cable movies and sometime after midnight, Daniel’s mobile rang and mouthing ‘Sebastian’ at me he disappeared off into the front room. After waiting a couple of minutes, I decided I’d had enough television and headed up to my room. It was only as I climbed into bed with a favourite book that I realised how tired I was.     

         The tiredness had initially hit me head-on, shortly after Eva’s little training episode, and even though Daniel kept getting me drinks, the hit of energy only lasted an hour or so each time. I put my book down and felt simultaneously exhausted and wired. My mind kept running through the events of the past twenty four hours - disturbing flashes of my life on fast forward.

         I thought I’d never be able to sleep, and the images actually seemed to speed up, but I soon found I couldn’t concentrate on any one memory. They became a blur. I was so tired I couldn’t focus and as I snuggled down, I pulled Daniel’s sweatshirt up from the floor and guiltily pulled it under the covers. I brought it up to my face, and inhaling his still lingering scent, I felt safe and calm. The blurring images began to fade and I was gone. The last flickering image I remembered was that of my dad, six months ago, smiling at me across the kitchen table. I was reading him my exam results. My future was like a bright star. I was unstoppable.

Chapter Eight

It was dark when I awoke, although as I peered blearily at the curtains I could just make out a dingy light, so dawn must have been on its way. I fidgeted, trying to get back to sleep, but something had disturbed me. It felt as if I’d been reluctantly dragged from a deep, dreamless sleep. I’d definitely not woken naturally, so I quickly glanced around the room, half expecting to see Daniel, but my room was empty and the house was silent. I wondered if Eva had come back, or if she’d gone back to her place. I cringed as I imagined her feeding from Daniel, and yet at the same time felt a little bit excited, jealous almost. Yuk! No, I couldn’t! I pushed the feeling away.

         I relaxed back into my pillows, closed my eyes and a second later heard a rustling sound, a hacking cough and a weak moan. I shot up in bed, wide awake. What the hell was that?

         I cried out, as I realised I was no longer in my room. I had been transported to a private hospital room, which was dimly lit with night lights. An old man was lying in bed. He looked shrunken, with dark hollows around his grey eyes, sadness etched into the lines. His skin had the typical yellowish tone of alcohol abuse, and as he shifted, he moaned my name.

         ‘Jessie, Jessie, not long now, baby.’

         ‘Dad? Dad! No!’ I cried out. I wanted to touch him, hold him, be held by him, but I couldn’t. I was just watching, or was I dreaming?

         ‘Jessie, Jessie. I’m so sorry baby. I never told you and now you know the truth. Jessie, I’m here now. I’m coming home to you,’ he croaked and his eyes lit up as if looking directly at me. He smiled and then, right before my eyes, the light went out.

         I screamed, shaking over and over.

         ‘No, no! No Dad,’ and suddenly I was back in my bed, shaking all over, as Daniel rushed through the door, bleary-eyed.

         ‘Jessica, Jessica, it’s all right. It’s just another nightmare. I’m here,’ he said, climbing into bed to hold me.

         ‘Shhhhh, it’s OK, it’s OK,’ he said soothing me, but this time his words didn’t calm me. It had been too real. My dad had just died and I was never going to get that chance to explain, to talk to him. I sobbed uncontrollably and tears fell unchecked.

         ‘He’s dead, Daniel. My dad, he’s gone,’ I said between sobs.

         ‘No, shhhh, it was just a dream. Sebastian has people at the hospital. He would have phoned if anything had happened,’ he said, gently stroking my hair.

         ‘No, I saw him. Something woke me, I heard him, and then I was there. I was in his hospital room. He’s in a private room, isn’t he? I saw him die, just now. Sebastian probably doesn’t even know yet,’ I said quietly, and as I looked up through my tears I saw Daniel’s face cloud over with concern.

         ‘Maybe I should go and call him. I’m sure it’s just a dream, Jess.’

         ‘No stay. I need you. He’ll call us soon enough.’ I closed my eyes and rested my head against Daniel’s chest. I could hear his heartbeat, much slower than a human’s, but regular and calming all the same.

         I breathed in his scent. It intoxicated me, supported me, tantalised me. It was unlike anything I’d smelt before. Luke had two particular scents, the one which smelled of his favourite aftershave and the one he had after a shower, a musky man scent, clean and warm. Daniel smelt entirely different, or maybe it was my improved sense of smell. I couldn’t place it, but it was like going out on a warm summer morning after a rainy night. It was a fresh smell, almost earthy, wet and warm. I wanted more of it. I wanted to be consumed by it. I knew it had the power to take all my fears and sadness away and lift me to a place where nothing could touch me.

         I lifted my face up to his and saw my desire mirrored in his own. Softly his lips pressed against mine, and I pulled him down next to me, so we were lying face to face, our lips kissing, the tips of our tongues flicking each other’s. I was lying on one arm, so with my free hand I stroked the side of his body. He had a t-shirt and boxers on so must have come straight from bed. Typical! The one time he sleeps, I go and wake him up. I smiled to myself and brought my hand back up to his chest. He pulled me closer than I thought was possible without getting squashed, and our kisses became more urgent.

         Suddenly he pulled back from me, and looking at me softly he whispered to me, his words full of concern. ‘Jessica, I want you to trust me. I know how you feel about feeding from humans, but I’m worried. You need more sustenance than the banked blood is giving you, and there is another way.’

         Before I could reply, he lifted himself up on one elbow and with his free hand drew a rather sharp looking nail I’d never noticed before across the thin skin on his neck. I watched, fascinated, as a thin line of bright blood seeped through the wound. Daniel instantly licked his finger and ran it back over the wound, and I saw the blood begin to run more freely.

         The smell hit me, like a bowl of melted, 80% dark chocolate, seductive and bitter at the same time. It drew me to him with such force, I couldn’t resist. I didn’t want to resist. Even if I’d any willpower left, I knew I wouldn’t refuse. Daniel wasn’t a human; he was offering himself to me willingly. He wanted me to drink. I had to drink. I needed to taste his blood. He drew me to him and I felt my fangs extend as he lowered himself back down. I closed the tiny gap between us, my lips touching his skin first, my tongue following and flicking out to lick his neck. 

         The taste exploded in my mouth, nothing like the stuff I’d been drinking. I heard myself moan quietly and he shivered slightly beneath me as he spoke.

         ‘Jessica, it won’t continue to flow if you don’t bite. It won’t hurt. I want you to. I
need
you to.’ His voice was low and husky as he breathed heavily against my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

         I paused for only a second, and felt just the slightest resistance, before my teeth slipped smoothly through his soft skin, causing a rush of warm blood. I felt Daniel’s arm tighten as he moaned with pleasure, whilst I drank hungrily, feeling the rich smooth blood coursing down my throat. I held him firmly, but Daniel was still much stronger, and without stopping me, he rolled over me so I was underneath, his breath hot against my bare shoulder. He moved my vest strap down and began kissing me, his other hand moving under my back and down my body, pulling me even closer. I could feel him, hard against my hip.

         His touch sent fire through my body and I sucked harder, all my worries and pain evaporating into a cloud of pleasure. I felt alive, and vibrant, and I slammed the cell door in my head shut, dismissing the disapproving girl and memories of the boy I loved.

         ‘Oh Jess, Mmm…’ he moaned in my ear, as our bubble was suddenly and excruciatingly popped by the ominous ring of the phone.

         I pulled my lips gently away from his neck, feeling my fangs begin to retract into place, surprised to see the tiniest of wounds already healing before my eyes. He pulled away from me reluctantly and I saw the lust in his eyes slowly replaced with concern, as his fangs also receded.

         ‘I’ll leave it. I can call him later,’ Daniel murmured to me gently.

         ‘No Daniel. Answer it. I need to know,’ I said, already sure what the news would be.

         A couple of minutes later he returned, his face set, ready to calm my grief and soothe my pain. He tentatively took a step towards me where I was huddled in my duvet.

         ‘Jess, I’m so sorry. You were right, he’s gone.’ His words were soft as he sat down beside me. His arms encircled me and pulled me to him. I’d known I was right, I knew what I’d seen, but a small part of me had hoped it was all a bad dream. The realisation that I was right, that my father had died and left me an orphan, shocked me numb. I couldn’t speak so I nodded, my eyes already filling up, staring ahead as I rocked myself gently back and forth.