Wizard's First Rule (20 page)

Richard was a little overwhelmed. “That leaves no room for error. But what if you aren’t sure?”

Zedd lifted an eyebrow. “You had better be sure, my boy, or you are liable to find yourself in a lot of trouble. The magic could read things in your mind you are not even aware of. It could go either way. You could kill a friend, or fail to kill a foe.”

Richard drummed his fingers on the hilt of the sword, thinking. He watched the setting sun offer small golden flashes through the trees to the west. Overhead, the
snakelike cloud had taken on a reddish cast on one side, deepening into darker purple on the other. It didn’t really matter, he decided. He knew who he was after, and there was no doubt at all in his mind about him being the enemy. None whatsoever.

“There’s one more thing. One more important thing,” the wizard said. “When you use the sword against an enemy, there is a price to pay. Is that not true, dear one?” He looked to her. Kahlan nodded and lowered her eyes to the ground. “The more powerful the enemy, the higher the price. I am sorry it was necessary to do that to you, Kahlan, but it is the most important lesson Richard must learn.” She gave him a small smile, letting him know that she understood the need. He turned back to Richard.

“We both know that sometimes, killing is the only choice, that it has to be classified as the right thing to do. I know you do not need to be told that any time you kill, though, it is a terrible thing. You live with it always, and once done, it cannot be undone. You pay a price within yourself; it diminishes you for having done it.”

Richard nodded; it still made him uneasy that he had killed the man on Blunt Cliff. He wasn’t sorry about what he had done; he had had no time or other choice, but in his mind he still saw the man’s face as he went over the edge.

Zedd’s eyes became intense. “It is different when you kill with the Sword of Truth, because of the magic. The magic has done your bidding, and it extracts a price. There is no such thing as pure good or pure evil, least of all in people. In the best of us there are thoughts or deeds that are wicked, and in the worst of us, at least some virtue. An adversary is not one who does loathsome acts for their own sake. He always has a reason that to him is justification. My cat eats mice. Does that make him bad? I don’t think so, and the cat doesn’t think so, but I would bet the mice have a different opinion. Every murderer thinks the victim needed killing.

“I know you don’t want to believe this, Richard, but you must listen. Darken Rahl does the things he does, because he thinks them right, just as you do the things you do because you think them right. The two of you are more the same in that than you think. You want revenge on him for killing your father, and he wants revenge on me for killing his. In your eyes he is evil, but to his eyes, you are the one who is evil. It is all just perception. Whoever wins thinks he was in the right. The loser will always believe himself wronged. It is the same as with the magic of Orden: the power is simply there; one use wins over the other.”

“The same? Have you lost your mind? How could you think we are the same in any way! He craves power! He would chance destroying the world to get it! I don’t want power, I just wanted to be left alone! He murdered my father! He ripped his guts out! He’s trying to kill us all! How can you say we are alike? You make it sound like he isn’t even dangerous!”

“Haven’t you been paying attention to what I have just been teaching you? I said you are the same in that you both think you are right. And that makes him more dangerous than you can imagine because in every other way you are different. Darken Rahl savors bleeding the life from people. He hungers for their pain. Your sense of right has bounds; his has none. His is twisted into an all-consuming lust to torture all opposition into submission, and he considers any who don’t rush to
bow before him as opposition. His conscience was clear when he used his bare hands to calmly extract your father’s guts while he was still breathing. He found pleasure in the doing because his distorted sense of right gives him license. That is how he is very different from you. That is how dangerous he is.” He pointed back at Kahlan. “Weren’t you paying attention? Didn’t you see what she was able to do with the sword? And how did she do what you could not? Hmm?”

“Perception,” Richard said, in a much quieter voice. “She was able to do it because she thought she was right.”

Zedd thrust a finger in the air. “Aha! Perception is what makes the threat even more dangerous.” The wizard’s finger came down and jabbed Richard’s chest with each word. “Just… like… the sword.”

Richard hooked a thumb under the baldric and let out a deep breath. He felt as if he were standing in quicksand, but he had lived with Zedd too long to dismiss the things he said simply because they were hard to fathom. He longed for simplicity, though. “You mean that it’s not only what he does that makes him dangerous, but also what he feels justified in doing?”

Zedd shrugged. “Let me put it another way. Who would you be more afraid of: a two-hundred-pound man who wants to steal a loaf of bread from you, and knows he is doing wrong, or a one-hundred-pound woman who believes, wrongly, but believes with all her heart, that you stole her baby?”

Richard folded his arms across his chest. “I would run from the woman. She wouldn’t give up. She wouldn’t listen to reason. She would be capable of anything.”

Zedd’s eyes were fierce. “So is Darken Rahl. Because he thinks he is right, he is that much more dangerous.”

Richard returned the fierce expression. “I am in the right.”

Zedd’s expression softened. “The mice think they are in the right, too, but my cat eats them just the same. I am trying to teach you something, Richard. I don’t want you to get caught in his claws.”

Richard unfolded his arms and sighed. “I don’t like it, but I understand. As I have heard you say, nothing is ever easy. While all of this is interesting, it isn’t going to frighten me away from doing what it is I must, what I believe to be right. So what is this business about a price to using the Sword of Truth?”

Zedd held a thin finger to Richard’s chest. “The payment is that you suffer the pain of seeing in yourself all your own evil, all your own shortcomings, all the things we don’t like to see in ourselves, or admit are there. And you see the good in the one you have killed, suffer the guilt for having done so.” Zedd shook his head sadly. “Please believe me, Richard, the pain comes not only from yourself, but more importantly, from the magic, a very powerful magic, a very powerful pain. Do not underestimate it. It is real, and it punishes your body, as well as your soul. You saw it in Kahlan, and that was from killing a tree. If it had been a man, it would have been profound. This is why anger is so important. Rage is the only armor you have against the pain; it gives a measure of protection. The stronger the enemy, the stronger the pain. But the stronger the rage, the stronger the shield. It makes you care less about the truth of what you have done. In some cases enough to not feel the pain. This is why I said the terrible things I did to Kahlan, things that hurt, and filled her with rage. It was to protect her when she used the sword.
You see why I wouldn’t have allowed you to take the sword, if you weren’t able to use your anger? You would be naked before the magic; it would tear you apart.”

Richard was a little frightened by this, by the look in Kahlan’s eyes after she had used the sword, but it didn’t dissuade him. He glanced up at the mountains of the boundary. They stood out, pale pink in the light of the setting sun. Behind them, from the east, darkness was coming. Darkness coming for them. He had to find a way across the boundary, into that darkness. The sword would help him, that was what mattered. There was much at stake. There was a cost to everything in life; he would pay this one.

His old friend placed his hands on Richard’s shoulders and looked hard into his eyes. Zedd’s features were set in grim warning.

“Now I have to tell you something you are not going to like.” His fingers tightened, almost painfully. “You cannot use the Sword of Truth on Darken Rahl.”

“What!”

Zedd gave him a shake. “He is too powerful. The magic of Orden protects him during his year of search. If you try to use the sword, you will be dead before it reaches him.”

“This is crazy! First you want me to be the Seeker and take the sword, now you tell me I can’t use it!” Richard was furious. He felt cheated.

“Just against Rahl, it won’t work against him! Richard, I didn’t make the magic, I only know how it works. Darken Rahl knows how it works too. He may try to make you use the sword against him. He knows it would kill you. If you give in to the rage and use the sword against him, he will win. You will be dead and he will have the boxes.”

Kahlan’s brow wrinkled in frustration. “Zedd, I agree with Richard. This makes it impossible. If he cannot use his most important weapon, then…”

Zedd cut her off. “No! This”—he rapped Richard on the head with his knuckles—“this is a Seeker’s most important weapon.” He jabbed his long finger at the center of Richard’s chest. “And this.”

Everyone stood in silence for a moment.

“The Seeker is the weapon,” Zedd said with emphasis. “The sword is just a tool. You can find another way. You must.”

Richard thought he should be upset, that he should feel angry, frustrated, overwhelmed, but he didn’t. His first view of his options lifted from him, letting him see beyond. He felt strangely calm and determined.

“I’m sorry, my boy. I wish I could change the magic, but I…”

Richard put his hand on Zedd’s shoulder. “It’s all right, my friend. You’re right. We must stop Rahl. That’s all that matters. I have to know the truth to succeed, and you have given me the truth. Now it’s up to me to use it. If we gain one of the boxes, justice will have Rahl. I don’t need to see it. I need only know it is done. I said I wouldn’t be an assassin, and so I shall not be. The sword will be invaluable, I’m sure, but as you said, it’s only a tool, and that’s the purpose I will put it to. The magic of the sword isn’t an end in itself. I can’t allow myself to make that mistake, or I will be only a pretend Seeker.”

In the gathering gloom, Zedd patted Richard affectionately on the shoulder. “You have gotten it all right, my boy. All of it.” He broke into a broad grin. “I
have chosen the Seeker well. I am proud of myself.” Richard and Kahlan laughed at Zedd’s self-congratulation.

Kahlan’s smile faded. “Zedd, I cut down the tree you planted in memory of your wife. That bothers me. I’m deeply sorry for doing it.”

“Don’t be, dear one, her memory has aided us. She has helped show the Seeker the truth, there could be no more fitting tribute to her.”

Richard didn’t hear them talking. Already he was looking to the east, to the massive wall of mountains, trying to think of solutions. Cross the boundary, he thought, cross the boundary without going through it. How? What if it was impossible? What if there was no way across the boundary? Would they be stuck here while Darken Rahl searched for the boxes? Were they to die without a chance? He wished there were more time and fewer limitations. Richard reprimanded himself for wasting time wishing.

If only he knew it could be done, then he could find out how. Something in the back of his mind nagged at him, insisting that it could be done, insisting he knew the truth of it. There was a way, there had to be. If he only knew that it was possible.

All around them, the night was coming alive with sounds. Frogs called from the ponds and streams, night birds from the trees, and insects from the grass. From the distant hills came the cry of wolves, mournful and plaintive against the dark wall of mountains. Somehow they had to cross those mountains, cross the unknown.

The mountains were like the boundary, he thought. You couldn’t go through them, but you could cross them. You had only to find a pass. A pass. Was it possible? Could there be one?

Then it struck him like a bolt of lightning.

The book.

Richard spun on his heels, excited. To his surprise Zedd and Kahlan were both standing quietly, watching him, as if waiting for a pronouncement.

“Zedd, have you ever helped anyone other than yourself go through the boundary?”

“Like who?”

“Anyone! Yes or no!”

“No. No one.”

“Can anyone other than a wizard send a person through the boundary?”

Zedd shook his head emphatically. “None but a wizard. And Darken Rahl, of course.”

Richard frowned at him. “Our lives depend on this, Zedd. Swear. You have never, ever, sent anyone other than yourself through the boundary. True?”

“True as a boiling bog full of toasted toads. Why? What have you thought of? Do you have a way?”

Richard ignored the question, too deep in his own stream of thought to answer, and instead turned back to the mountains. It was true; there was a pass across the boundary! His father had found it, and used it! That was the only way the Book of Counted Shadows could have been in Westland. He couldn’t have brought it with him when he moved here, before the boundary, and he couldn’t have found it in Westland; the book had magic. The boundary wouldn’t have worked if magic had
been here then. Magic could only be brought into Westland after the boundary was up.

His father had found a pass, gone into the Midlands, and brought the book back. Richard was shocked and excited at the same time. His father had done it! He had gone across the boundary. Richard was elated. Now he knew there was a way across; it could be done. He still had to find the pass, but that didn’t matter for now. There was a pass; that was what mattered.

Richard turned back to the other two. “We will go have supper.”

“I put a stew on, just before you awoke, and there is fresh bread,” Kahlan offered.

“Bags!” Zedd threw his scarecrow arms up into the air. “It’s about time someone remembered supper!”

Richard gave a little smile in the dark. “After we’ve eaten, we’ll make preparations, decide what we need to take, what we can carry, get our provisions together and packed tonight. We’ll need to get a good night’s sleep. We leave at first light.” He turned and headed for the house. The faint glow of the fire coming from the windows offered warmth and light.