World's Most Eligible Texan (18 page)

“I can get home by myself.”

“No, you don't,” he said, standing. “I'll take you home and I'm staying when we get there, whether we talk or not. Lady, you may be in danger—another fact you fail to face.”

He took her arm and they went downstairs to his pickup and rode in an uncomfortable silence to her apartment. She knew it was useless to protest his staying with her. Thirty minutes later as she stepped from the bathroom in her robe, he stood in the hall. He had shed his shirt and wore only his jeans, and he stood with one hip canted against the wall while he studied her.

“I know how to be patient. I love you and want to marry you. And I want to be a father to my baby.”

“I have to do what I think is right for you, for me and for the baby.”

“Well, you're blind to the truth. I don't see how you can think going our separate ways will be good for any of us.”

“I think you're the one who's blind to reality,” she said gently, hurting more than she thought was possible. “And I think we need some distance between us for a while to really think things through.”

“Not while you're in possible danger,” he said tersely. A muscle worked in his jaw and while he looked relaxed, leaning slightly against the wall, she saw one fist was clenched, his knuckles white.

“If you were away from me, you might feel differently about all this.”

“I was away from you for a month in Spain.”

“I don't want to rush into marriage. The minute you found out about the baby, you were in love. Not before, Aaron. That isn't the way it should be.” She hurried past him to her room and closed the door, sagging against it, surprised he had let her pass without stopping her.

As she crossed the room, for the first time she noticed the blinking light on her answering machine. She punched the button to hear her messages and received two. The first was from Nancy, her neighbor, to tell her Handley's had left a bouquet for her and Nancy had the roses at her place. Pamela shook her head, thinking about all the dozens of flowers Aaron had sent her, the dazzling ring and life he had offered to her tonight. The next voice came on:

“Pamela, it's Jessica. They have an opening right now in one of the Fort Worth elementary schools. I know the principal—he called me to see if I knew anyone who could fill the position because they're desperate. One of the teachers had to quit in the middle of the semester to take care of her mother. They're going to fill this immediately so you need to talk to them tomorrow if possible. I've tried to get you all evening. Give me a call, no matter how late tonight.”

Pamela stared into the darkness. A teaching job in Fort Worth would take her away from Aaron, and she knew it was the right thing to do. Reluctantly, she reached for the phone.

Three hours later, long before dawn, she wrote a note to Aaron. She propped it on the kitchen table and, taking great care to turn off the alarm and not make any noise, she let herself out of the apartment. She suspected she could never have slipped out at his house without waking him, but people came and went all hours of the day and night at her apartment complex and the place was never quiet like his neighborhood. A car starting up wouldn't jolt him out of sleep here.

She looked at his pickup parked next to her car and ran her hand along the door. “Goodbye, Aaron. I love you,” she
whispered. As she unlocked the door to her car, she glanced around, aware someone could be watching her, but at the moment, caring very little and unable to see for the blur of her tears.

She slid behind the wheel and locked her car doors, driving out of the complex before she needed to switch on her car lights. As she accelerated and headed for the highway, she felt as if her heart was breaking into a million shattered pieces that would never fit back together.

A
aron came awake, staring into the quiet living room. A faint border of light showed around the edges of the blinds. He stretched and sat up, knowing things weren't right. For the first time, he began to wonder if he would ever get across to Pamela his feelings for her.

Whatever happened, he intended to be at her side for the birth of their baby. In frustration he ran his fingers through his hair. For once in his life, words had failed him, and he had been unable to convince her about his feelings. Marriage to her was the most important thing in his life. She didn't believe he knew his own feelings. And she couldn't stop seeing herself as too country for him.

He loved the woman with all his heart. He was as sure of that as he was certain he was a Texan. Why couldn't she see it? He had tried every way he knew how to show her.

“Darlin', you're a stubborn woman,” he said softly, shaking his head. He didn't want to put any distance between them. Far from it. He wanted her in his arms and in his bed every
night of his life. Life was empty and cold without her. He rubbed his neck, kinked from sleeping on her short sofa. His whole life was in a kink over this woman.

He stood and stretched, yanking on briefs and jeans. He didn't want to wake her, and went to the kitchen to start breakfast, trying to be quiet as he poured orange juice and fixed himself a piece of toast. He went back to the living room to fold up his covers. He tiptoed out the front door to get the Royal newspaper and the Dallas newspaper and then he sat in the kitchen, reading. When he was through with both papers, he moved restlessly. She was never this late getting up. He glanced at his watch. Almost eight in the morning. He had appointments and needed to shower and shave.

He turned and looked at the alarm and saw it was turned off. He crossed the room to look at it closely and then started to go to her room when he noticed a note propped on the counter with his name scrawled across the front of the folded paper. How had he missed seeing this earlier?

Cold dread enveloped him as he crossed the narrow space and picked up the note. Knowing what he would find, he didn't want to read it.

He let the note flutter from his hands to the counter as he walked to the window and opened the blinds. Her car was gone and only his pickup was in the carport.

Where had she gone? How long since she'd left? How long had she planned leaving him? She already had a job and hadn't told him?

He hurt with a consuming pain that immobilized him. “Dammit,” he swore, worrying about her safety. He whirled
around and hurried to the bathroom to dress and start searching for her.

As he drove to his Pine Valley home, he called Dakota on his cellular phone.

“Dakota, Pamela's gone and she didn't leave word where she was going. She wants to be on her own for a while, but I'm worried about her. Keep those two under surveillance as much as you can, will you?”

“Sure. I'll get a friend to help. Anything else I can do?”

“If there is, I'll let you know. Thanks.”

Aaron punched off the phone. “Dammit, Mellie. This isn't the time to slip off without letting anyone know where you are or what you're doing.” He prayed she hadn't been followed from her apartment and tried to reassure himself with the fact that he hadn't seen anyone following them for several days now. But if someone discovered she had gone off alone…

“Dammit,” he swore again, pressing the accelerator and feeling a sense of urgency to find her as quickly as possible, not only for himself, but for her safety.

“She doesn't want you to find her,” he reminded himself and grimaced. If she wanted to get off by herself to think things over, he didn't want to crowd her, but he was worried about her. And he thought they had been so close to an end to all her foolish notions that she wasn't the woman for him. Couldn't the lady see that she was the
only
woman for him?

By noon Aaron felt as if the earth had opened up and swallowed her. He couldn't find a trace of her from her neighbors, and he had to wait until school was out to talk to her teacher friends. Shortly before school was out, he went to see the principal of the school where she had taught, remembering Thad Delner from the Texas Cattleman's Club gala the night he met Pamela.

Within minutes after sitting in Thad Delner's office, Aaron's frustrations increased. The principal sat behind his desk and studied Aaron. “I remember you from the gala. I
think you took her home that night, and I hear you've been dating lately.”

“Yes, sir, we have. I've asked Pamela to marry me.”

“Ah, congratulations. Pamela is an excellent teacher, a wonderful person.”

“I think so. Right now, I'd like to find her because I'm worried about her safety. I've been staying with her or she's stayed at my place since someone broke into her apartment and trashed it. She left a note that she was going to see a friend, but I'm concerned for her safety.”

“Have you talked to the police?”

“Not yet. I thought if I can find out where she is, I can talk to her myself.”

“I'm sorry, Mr. Black. I can't help you. I don't know all of her friends. My teachers' lives are their own, for the most part, once they leave my school.”

Feeling restless and knowing he was at a dead end here, Aaron stood and offered his hand. “Thanks. If you don't mind, as soon as school is out, I'd like to talk to several of the teachers who are her close friends.”

“That's fine. In about five minutes the bell should ring. If you'd like, you're welcome to wait here in the office until school is dismissed.”

“Thanks, I'll be fine.”

As soon as the building emptied of students, Aaron talked to three teachers before he found a woman named Sally Grayson who told him Pamela's best friend was Jessica Atkins who lived in Midland.

Within the hour Aaron was in his pickup driving to Midland. He had already learned Jessica had an unlisted phone number, but with the help of Dakota Lewis, he had found Jessica's address.

 

In Fort Worth, Pamela left the principal's office and stepped into the sunshine. It had been a little over twelve hours since she'd left Aaron at her apartment. Not long enough for any of the pain to dull. Now she had a job in Fort Worth and would
start Monday morning teaching second grade. It was what she wanted and what she thought she should do, but why did it seem so wrong? She hurt constantly and could barely carry on a coherent conversation. She suspected she would never have gotten the job except that the school was desperate and she had come highly recommended, but during her interview, she'd had difficulty concentrating on anything the principal had said to her.

She hurried to her car parked in visitor parking and looked back at the school. Only three years old and made of brick and glass, the sprawling elementary school had state-of-the-art equipment, and her salary would be an increase over what she had made in Royal, yet she didn't feel anything except a deep sense of resignation for doing what she had to do.

The morning sickness was as bad as ever, and she prayed she could handle her nausea. Wind caught her hair, blowing it across her cheek. Next she had a list of apartments to look at. The sooner she made the move, the better off she would be. She suspected Aaron would not give up easily, and when he found her, she wanted to be in her own apartment, working at her new job. In order to give her a little time to get settled, she had wrung a promise out of Jessica not to tell Aaron where she had gone.

Time to get settled and to heal. She wondered if she would ever heal over the hurt of telling him goodbye. And why was it nagging at her that she was making a mistake? She had been over and over it, but everything had been so good between them and the tempting thought of letting go of her doubts and marrying him, giving their baby a father, tore at her.

She straightened her shoulders. “Remember his background, his life away from Royal. Get real, woman. You're country and he is not. Maybe a bit of cowboy still lingers in him, but he is so much else.”

She looked at her map of the area and at the list of apartments, hoping she could find something close to the school. Suddenly she was swamped with loss, missing Aaron, knowing what she was losing, and she had to lean her head against
the steering wheel while she cried. It hurt so badly because she missed him dreadfully.

She spent the rest of the day looking at apartments, none of which appealed to her, and early in the evening went back to her motel room on the Midland highway. She drove slowly and carefully, knowing that her full attention wasn't on her driving.

That night she could eat only a few bites of dinner and cried herself to sleep, missing Aaron more with each passing minute. While she kept telling herself the pain would dull with time and finally heal, the loss hurt badly, and she couldn't believe her own words.

The next morning she spent the first hours nauseated and crying. With determination, she left the motel, a list of available apartments in hand to begin another day's search for a place to live.

Late in the afternoon she made a deposit on a small, one-bedroom apartment that was sunny, filled with windows. She hoped it would be cheerful to come home to, but as she stood signing papers, she could only think how empty it looked and remember Aaron sprawled on her short sofa, his long legs dangling off. She missed him every second of the day. Missed him to distraction.

“You need to sign here, Miss Miles.”

“I'm sorry,” Pamela said, coming out of her daze and staring at her new blond landlady. She couldn't even remember the woman's name. Pamela took the pen and signed her name, handing over her check for the deposit.

“It's a very quiet place, and you'll have a swimming pool and clubhouse facilities.”

“That's nice. Thank you,” Pamela said, barely hearing the woman. She accepted a key, glancing once more at the place that would be her new home. A home for her and their baby.
Aaron's baby.

As tears welled in her eyes, she was aware her landlady was staring at her. “Thank you,” she mumbled, accepting the key and turning away before she was crying uncontrollably.

As soon as she was in her car, she jotted down the address again, certain she wouldn't remember it an hour from now. She went out to eat, barely able to get anything down, knowing the hardest part was ahead of her because she had to go back to Royal and get her things and move. And she would see Aaron.

It was dusk when she left the restaurant and drove back to the motel. She was exhausted, still hurting as much as ever. She turned the corner to her room and gripped the steering wheel in a moment of déjà vu when she looked at the shiny black pickup parked in front of her motel door.

 

Aaron watched her drive up, and his heart was in his throat. He had rehearsed what he would say to her, but his practiced arguments were forgotten when she stepped out of her car and stood facing him. All color drained from her face. She looked haggard, her eyes red, yet she still was the most beautiful woman on earth to him.

For the first time in his life, he had nothing to say. He felt helpless and adrift, wanting with all his heart and soul to let her know the depth of his feelings for her. He walked over to her and took her into his arms.

Pamela looked up at the tall man holding her, and fought her tears and tried to conjure up the words she knew she should say, but then he leaned down. His mouth covered hers, and words were gone while he kissed her as if he had waited years for this kiss.

“Mellie,” he whispered. Shocked, Pamela tasted salty tears and leaned back to look at him, stunned that this tough, worldly cowboy diplomat was shedding tears. She looked into his green eyes and saw that he was as torn with hurt as she. It was astonishing. Impossible. A moment of revelation. Aaron, hurting enough to
cry
over her?

“You love me,” she whispered.

“I've been trying to convince you of my love for the past month,” he said roughly, swiping at his face. “You're my
life, woman. I'm not fit for anything without you. I love you, Mellie.”

“Oh, Aaron,” she said in awe, letting go of her doubts and fears and wrapping her arms tightly around his neck as she stood on tiptoe to kiss him. “I love you. I missed you.” She leaned back. “You're sure? I don't know anything about fancy balls and the life you lead overseas.”

“You can learn it just like I did. You think I knew about it when I left Royal? And if you really don't want that, we can stay home. I can live on the ranch. I'm as good a cowpoke as a diplomat.”

“You'd give up your diplomatic career if I wanted you to?” she asked, beginning to realize the depth of his love and feeling as if boulders were lifting off her heart. “Oh, Aaron!” She threw herself against him to kiss him.

His arms banded her tightly as he leaned down to kiss her long and hungrily. He raised his head, dug in his pocket and pulled out the engagement ring. “Will you marry me?”

“Yes! Oh, yes, yes, yes!”

He kissed her again, longer this time, and then raised his head to look down at her. “We'll have a big fancy church wedding with family and friends.”

“I don't have to, Aaron.”

“I know you don't, but I want one. My family will love an excuse to get together.”

“Your family! Aaron, they're not going to—”

“Yes, they're going to love you like I do. You'll see. What do you think I have for a family—a bunch of cold-hearted monsters?”

“Of course not.”

“They're lovable like me. Now what we're going to do—we'll have that wedding and it will all be official and a big deal, but for tonight, I don't want to wait. You said yes and I don't want any cold feet or worries. I want to find a justice of the peace and get married right now.”