Wrestling Against Myself (34 page)

BOOK: Wrestling Against Myself
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Tony hoped for the best, but considering the reactions he had seen when Courtney being a boy was just a rumor, he figured there would be some kind of fall out.

 

“Lord,” Tony said as he got out of the chair and fell to his knees. “Give me the wisdom to know what the right thing to do is and give me the strength to see it through. And God, please be with Courtney, this must be a difficult thing that she is dealing with. Give her your peace that surpasses all understanding and guide her to the center of your will for her life. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.”

 

Chapter 31

Though Antonio didn't normally look forward to Mondays, this Monday couldn't arrive fast enough. He didn't get into any details about things during church, but he made arrangements for everyone who ate lunch with him to meet before school. It was about time to put the rumors to bed and though he rather not be confirming them, they were truthful and his friends had the right to know. How they responded would not change the way he interacted with Courtney, but he couldn't speak for anyone else.

 

With juicy gossip in the air, it didn't take much to convince the group to show up early, including Stephanie who was the first one to show up.

 

“I don't know why you couldn't tell us on Sunday,” Shannon said as he leaned against the wall outside of where they held prayer meeting.

 

Antonio would have preferred sitting down in the classroom, but the door was locked and he didn't want to bother locating one of the janitors. “For one, we don't all go to the same church and, two, church wasn't the place to discuss things while we were preparing to worship God.

 

“But you know why this rumor is going around and making our lives miserable?” Dave asked.

 

“Maybe she's a shape shifter,” Ted offered.

 

Tony gave Ted a sharp look and then turned to Dave. “Our lives miserable?”

 

“Well, yeah,” Dave wasn't backing down. “Do you know how many people have come up to me and said something about her? It gets annoying.”

 

“Think about how she feels,” Antonio said pointedly.

 

“What's the big secret,” Carl asked, trying to get the group back on focus.

 

Tony paced back and
forth; he was at a loss on how to phrase the situation properly. “I had a talk to Courtney, Friday, when I drove her home.”

 

“Did you tell her what everyone was saying,” Stephanie asked.

 

“I did mention about the rumors and wanted to hear what she had to say about them.”

 

“Why is everyone calling her a boy,” Tracy asked impatiently.

 

Tony chewed his bottom lip as he thought of the right words. “It's like this, Courtney has a condition.”

 

“Like she's sick,” Dave jumped in impulsively.

 

“Maybe she's a mutant,” Ted said.

 

“She is not a mutant,” Tony countered, “and don't say that in front of her, she's got enough people making fun of her as it is.”

 

“A mutant isn't an insult,” Ted said.

 

“Maybe not to you, but to some people it is.”

 

“Come on, Tiny,” Shannon said. “What's the deal with her?”

 

“She has a condition where her body doesn't match who she is.”

 

“You mean he is a boy,” Shannon said.

 

“Not exactly. The only way to explain it, I guess, is that she is a girl but her body didn't go along with the plan.”

 

“Does he have a penis or not?” Stephanie asked loudly.

 

“I'm assuming she does,” Tony admitted.

 

“Damn it, Tiny,” Shannon shouted. “That dude is a queer and you're defending him.”

 

“I'm not defending anyone,” Tony remained calm. “I'm just presenting the facts.”

 

“The fact is we've been protecting someone who brought this junk on themselves and is trying to bring us down too,” Stephanie said.

 

“Yeah, Tiny,” Shannon continued the argument. “Dude wants to be a queer and flaunt it in front of everyone; he should expect to be pounded into oblivion.”

 

“Really?” Tony could see the situation getting away from him and wished his friends responded more evenly. “Is that what Jesus would expect of us? We're supposed to be the ones who show what the love of Christ is all about; I don't think pounding someone into oblivion is an act of love.”

 

“What about not being unequally yoked?” Stephanie said. “What has light to do with darkness? Or have you forgotten that part of your Bible. That kid is a fraud and I don't see how you can protect him and call him a she.”

 

“Because that is what she is,” Tony said.

 

“No that thing is living in sin,” Shannon said angrily.

 

“If you really think that way than if anyone needs to be shown the love of Christ it would be her then, wouldn't it?”

 

“I won't be mean or nasty to him,” Shannon replied. “I won't be the one to give him a beating either, but I'm not going to stop others from doing what they feel is right and I'm not going to be that thing's friend while it chooses to live in sin.”

 

“Then you are no worse than the sinners and the publicans,” Tony quoted straight from the Bible.

 

“I never thought I would see the day when Tiny was blinded by someone's sin,” Stephanie said. “I'm with Shannon here. I won't be nasty to him, but I can't be his friend and I don't want him eating lunch with me either. It's totally gross.”

 

“Let him eat lunch at the front table where he was before you invited him to our table, Tiny,” Shannon reiterated.

 

“I'm not going to turn anyone away from our table. It's not our way,” Tony said evenly.

 

“You mean it's not your way. I don't agree with it and I'm not going to be seen eating with that thing,” Shannon said. “I have a reputation to think about.”

 

“It's either him or us, Tiny,” Stephanie continued.

 

“You're welcome to sit at the table any time you like, but I'm not sending anyone away.”

 

“Geez,” Stephanie said in a huff. “You really think you know your friends. I'm out of here.”

 

“Me too,” Shannon said roughly. “You better get your head on straight on this one, Tiny. It's not very often, but you're wrong and I won't have anything to do with that thing; good or bad.”

 

Tony watched as two of his friends stormed off.

 

“Wow,” Dave said as Shannon and Stephanie disappeared.

 

“Total melt down,” Ted added.

 

“Okay, that leaves the five of us. Anyone else want to air their displeasure.”

 

“I don't know, Tiny,” Dave said hesitantly.

 

“It certainly is weird,” Ted finished.

 

“I'm not saying that it's common or we're use to dealing with it,” Antonio tried to come off as sympathetic. “I'm sure Courtney didn't come to this conclusion lightly. Think about all she is risking. It's like the whole school has turned against her and she could use every friend she can get.”

 

“I'll do it,” Carl said. “I'll be her friend, but I don't know if I agree with what she is doing.”

 

“Yeah, a boy wearing girls' clothing is extremely weird,” Tracy said.

 

“I don't look at it that way,” Tony explained. “I view it more as a girl wearing girl clothes, nothing weird about that. Besides, 'do not worry about what you should wear, isn't the body more than clothes,' that's from Matthew six. If the Bible says we shouldn't worry about what we wear, why are we worrying so much about what someone else is wearing?”

 

“It's totally weird,” Dave said. “But we'll still be her friend.”

 

“Yeah,” Ted added. “And we won't even say anything about her being a boy under her clothes.”

 

Antonio smirked. “I guess that's as good as it's going to get.”

 

“What are you going to do about Shannon and Stephanie?” Carl asked.

 

“We'll pray for them, that the Lord will soften their hearts, but outside of that, they are going to hold to their own convictions.”

 

“And what about the rest of the school making fun of her and us,” Tracy asked.

 

“We really can't argue with them, they aren't spreading any lies, they just have the facts distorted. I say we let the teasing and name calling run its course, the more we try to combat it, the longer it will continue. As long as they aren't physically harming Courtney, I don't see what we can do other than stand by her. As for us being made fun of, I don't see why anyone would. We made a decision to not be jerks and to be someone's friend, if they have a problem with then it's their issue not ours.”

 

“Something tells me this is going to be a long school year,” Tracy said.

 

“Nah,” Tony countered. “I think in a week or two it will all be over and the school will find something else to focus on. It's the way things happen.”
“I hope you're right,” Tracy said.

 

“We're going to head to the library,” Dave said.

 

“Yeah,” Ted added, “we can work on our game before school. Thanks for telling us what was up.”

 

“No problem,” Tony said.

 

Tracy picked up her back pack. “I got to get going too. I was supposed to hand in a paper on Friday but my printer ran out of ink. I was told to hand it in first thing today or lose a letter grade.”

 

Antonio looked at his watch. “You better get going, you got ten minutes.”

 

Tracy gave a small wave and then followed behind Dave and Ted.

 

Carl mulled about. “It's just us again.”

 

“Yep, want to wrestle?”

 

“Not first thing in the morning. It would look bad if one of us went to class with a black eye.”

 

“I wouldn't give you a black eye,” Tony said.

 

“I wasn't talking about me.”

 

Tony laughed. “You got me on that one.”

 

“Tiny,” Carl said as he walked alongside his friend. “Do you think you're doing the right thing with this Courtney business?”

 

Antonio shrugged. “I hope so. I don't see what else we could do.”

 

“Maybe it isn't the best that we reinforce that he is a girl, it might be doing more harm than good.”

 

Tony sighed. “I've given it a lot of thought this weekend, trust me on that. I don't think anything we say or do will reinforce that Courtney is a girl. To be honest, I think she is a girl.”

“How do you figure?”

 

“If it were anyone of us, I don't think we would dare show up to school wearing a dress and trying to pass ourselves off as girls. But even if we did, if we didn't believe in our heart of hearts that we were a girl, we would've
succumbed to all the pressures around us telling us to go back.”

 

“You think she really is a girl?”

 

“You used she, that's a good start,” Tony said with a smile. “But, yes, I do think she is who she says she is. Courtney is a girl who was born in the body of a boy. I don't understand why or how, but it is what it is. It's not for me to judge, or even to figure it out for her. The best thing we can do is be Christ for her and accept her for who she is, flaws and all.”

 

“A girl having a penis is a mighty big flaw, Tiny.”

 

“I view it as she has an abnormality.”

 

“You've been paying attention in science class again,” Carl teased.

 

“I went through my notes from last year. But people are born with differences all the time. What if she had Down Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy? We wouldn't make fun of her then. Or if she was born without an arm or a leg? We wouldn't try to get her out of the school. The only difference between those conditions and what's going on with Courtney is that the other problems are easier to see. I think most people have an issue with Courtney because they think it's something that she can control.”

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