Write That Book Already!: The Tough Love You Need To Get Published Now (14 page)

ALL MANUSCRIPTS NEED EDITING

Although it’s true that many agents have taken on more of an editorial role in order to present proposals and manuscripts that are as salable as possible, this has more to do with the fact that so many people want to be published.

Tough Love from the Author Enablers

Just because you have a great computer and the most up-to-date word processing software and templates, there’s no substitute for good writing, rewriting, and editing. Remember— Shakespeare wrote with a pen and Homer was blind. ‹«

Aspiring writers have access to computers and word processing programs that make it physically easier to produce a decent-looking manuscript, so there’s more competition in sheer quantity than ever before. A good editor (and most of them, let’s face it, wouldn’t have jobs if they weren’t pretty good)
will
edit your book. There may be moments when this won’t be a lot of fun, because you thought (once again) that you were done. But it is your editor’s job to look at the big picture—the work as a whole, consistency of voice, the narrative arc (that the story flows and makes sense), that it is structured properly, that it isn’t overwritten or missing crucial components, and that it is a fresh, original work. And it is the editor’s job (along with the managing editor) to comb through the book, line by line, helping you shape your writing into the masterpiece we all know it was meant to be.

But editors do a lot more than edit. For one thing, sometimes they take you to lunch, often at very nice restaurants. You’ll be too worried about the possibility of spilling something or getting spinach stuck in your teeth to actually
enjoy
the lunch, but this is something editors are good at, so try to have some fun.

Just as important, at most publishing companies it is the editors who acquire the books. Most of them don’t have the authority to make an offer without jumping through some company/ corporate hoops, but these are the people who are actually charged with finding and buying intellectual property on behalf of the publisher, taking on a kind of parental role over your manuscript. Since you’ve probably spent years writing your book and undoubtedly think of it as your baby, this can take some getting used to. Once a publisher acquires your book, it really isn’t all yours anymore. As in any co-parenting arrangement, the two of you may not always agree on the judgment calls. Choose your battles carefully, and be willing to compromise. Understanding the process from the editor’s point of view can help make this a smooth and positive relationship, and—in some cases—even an enduring friendship.

Editors are inundated with submissions, and every editor comes into work each day to find a new stack of manuscripts and proposals. They are all looking out for books in their area of interest or expertise, and they are trying to avoid books that are too similar to something else the house has recently bought or published, as well as books by fanatics, lunatics, and terrible writers. Above all, they are looking for books that they think they can sell to their colleagues in-house, who will then sell to the sales reps, who will then sell to the retailers, who will sell your book to readers.

A MADE-UP TRUE-LIFE ACCOUNT OF THE EDITORIAL PROCESS

Editor Laura is staring at a pile of manuscripts on her desk. Loretta, Laura’s underpaid assistant, has made some notes on each manuscript, but Laura knows enough not to entirely trust her assistant’s views, as Loretta is more focused on checking her Facebook page and managing her boyfriend’s alternative polka band than on her work. Still, Loretta is cheerful, shows up on time, and somehow manages to live on a pathetically small salary, so Laura feels she can’t really complain.

Laura flips through the stack and something about Tony’s novel catches her eye. “Vampire dogs,” she thinks. “No one’s done that before.”

Laura starts reading Tony’s book that night and really enjoys it. She plans on reading more the next day, forgetting that she has back-to-back meetings to discuss books she’s already working on. Other burning issues arise, and before she knows it weeks pass and Tony’s manuscript still sits, neglected but not forgotten.

Eventually Tony’s agent calls Laura to talk about the latest movies, catch up on some publishing gossip, compliment Laura for doing a great job on another client’s book, and, by the way, see how it’s going with Tony’s submission. Laura, looking at the unfinished manuscript on her shelf, is evasive. But that night she takes the manuscript home and finishes reading it. There are a couple of weaknesses—nothing that can’t be fixed—and she wants to make an offer. Meanwhile Tony, feeling like a loser because no one has bought his book yet, fills out an application to work as a character actor at Disneyland. He’s thinking he’d make a good Goofy.

The next day, Laura starts laying the groundwork for Tony’s book. Keep in mind that buying a book is a serious gamble for the publisher, who will be committing money, staff time, and reputation to a book that may sell only a small number of copies. A consensus that Tony’s book is worthy must be reached within the company before an offer can be made, and a lot of water-cooler politicking can occur. Laura starts by talking the novel up to some key people, and also asks a few colleagues to read an excerpt from one of the stronger chapters.

Some days go by, and now there is a small chorus of voices agreeing that this book may have potential. The editorial director—AKA Laura’s boss—backs the book, and so does the publisher. Laura has been given the thumbs-up to make an offer—nothing extravagant, but a real commitment.

Tony gets the call from his agent and gets out of bed for the first time in days. However, a deal has not been struck—in fact, it will probably take weeks of back-and-forth between Laura (and her bosses) and Tony’s agent before they strike a deal. When Tony gets the word that the terms of the sale are basically finalized, he goes to Disneyland to celebrate. While the contract is being drawn up, introductions are made. Tony talks to Laura and perhaps a few other members of the publishing team. He is ecstatic. He loves them all.

HURRY UP AND WAIT

What Tony doesn’t realize is that it may be two years before he is a published author. Laura has plenty of other books to work on and more projects to acquire. She also has to work with the marketing and publicity teams on books that have been recently published or are coming out in the next season, and she has to maintain her relationships with the agents, authors, and other publishing pros that are the lifeblood of her work—this is why she’s so good at taking people to lunch. Plus, she has a life. Sometimes.

When Laura does get around to editing Tony’s book, she suggests some serious structural changes. She thinks it should begin with a scene that now appears in the middle of the book. She doesn’t like Tony’s humorous sidebars, something he worked really hard on but that she considers inappropriate in a vampire dog novel. She thinks the scenes with the primary female human character are weak and two-dimensional and need beefing up. But the really upsetting news for Tony is that Laura wants to change the title. Her suggestion—
Barking for Blood
—horrifies Tony, who calls his agent to complain. The agent, accustomed to upset authors, calms Tony down by agreeing with a lot of what he says. Actually, she thinks that his original title,
Canine Revenge,
didn’t work; but she doesn’t think
Barking for Blood
works either. She thinks it should be
Old Fangful.

Over the next year, Laura and Tony go through several drafts together. By the time they are done it is practically another book. The funny thing is, Tony begins to see that their work is improving his writing. He’s even come around about the new title,
Count Barkula.
But when Laura says she is happy with the latest version Tony is surprised and concerned. What about the typos? Laura calms him down by explaining that the book is now going to the managing editorial department for copyediting and design.

Several months later Tony receives a printed copy of his manuscript littered with tiny red marks. Copyeditors are grammar fanatics, happiest when they find errors that need correcting—and they
always
find errors. They actually
like
finding errors. That’s why they have the job.

Tony has to be in New York for a family visit, so he makes an appointment to stop in at the publisher’s office and meet Laura in person for the first time.

Facing the large Midtown building that houses his publisher’s offices, Tony has to stop for a minute to catch his breath. He can hardly believe this is happening! He walks through security and wills himself to remember every moment of the elevator ride up to the fifteenth-floor editorial offices; the smooth, carpeted ride; the genteel bell announcing the elevator’s arrival on his floor; the polka-dot blouse on the young receptionist who asks him to take a seat. He looks around and sees posters advertising books he’s read and enlarged photographs of some of his favorite authors. He feels his life changing as he sits there, and vows to write about this moment in his next novel.

Laura appears, and Tony is momentarily startled—he had always pictured her as a tall brunette with glasses, and instead he sees a petite blonde. It will take him a few more meetings to remember what Laura really looks like when he talks to her on the phone.

After a quick tour of the office, Laura offers Tony a couple of hot-off-the-presses hardcovers to read on the plane, and he’s thrilled to accept. She then calls a few colleagues, and they gather in Laura’s office before going to lunch.

THE TRANSITION FROM EDITORIAL TO MARKETING AND PUBLICITY

The purpose of the lunch is to get acquainted in person, of course, but it is also something we like to call the “hand-off lunch,” in which Tony is introduced to the people who will guide him through the next stage of the publishing process. He doesn’t realize it yet, but his direct communication with Laura will lessen as his book gets closer to publication. She’ll move on to other books, and he’ll work more closely with the publicity and marketing people. This can be a difficult transition, kind of like a parent handing a toddler over to the babysitter and trying to leave the house as the child clings to his mother’s neck. When done skillfully, though, the hand-off is a seamless, positive experience. (Of course, it doesn’t have to be lunch. It can be, and often is, a phone-and-e-mail handoff. But we like lunch.)

Laura is a pro, and Tony is impressed with Veronica and Ben, the publicity and marketing team assigned to his title. They’ve come well-prepared with a creative plan for getting the word out about Tony’s book, and invite him to contribute ideas. They also ask him to fill out something called an author questionnaire.

The questionnaire is an extensive document that asks about the author’s background, affiliations, and experience. It’s not a whole lot of fun to fill out, but it’s important, as it gives the publicity team crucial information about the author’s contacts and platform, where he comes from, and who his people are. Tony is also asked to write a ten-question “dream interview”: the ten questions he would most like to be asked about his book, followed by the answers. You will have already done this, because you read our book. This may be used in his press kit, and might even appear published in a secondary-market publication as an interview. It helps the publicist refine the pitch and figure out how to approach the media, and clarifies what questions an author is most comfortable answering.

For the next few months Tony is working with Veronica, Ben, and some of the others in the publicity department. A publicist gets in touch about his personal travel plans; there’s no budget for a tour, but the organizer of a vampire film festival and dog show in Austin is wondering about an author appearance. The marketing team wants some information. At the same time the copyeditor is being a pest with all kinds of niggling detail questions.

Tough Love from the Author Enablers

So you think you have quite a sense of design and you’ve always pictured the cover of your vampire dog book as all black. What could be more dramatic? Take our word for it—you should let your publisher design your cover. We can’t guarantee that they’ll get it perfect, but they are the pros and they have both the experience and the objectivity that you lack. We can often tell at a glance when a book has been self-published, because the cover never quite has that professionally designed look. ‹«

Laura is still on the job, checking on everything and approving every stage of the book’s progress. She writes his cover copy, fights for a better marketing plan, and argues with everyone about the cover images. She is talking the book up in-house and to colleagues in the business.

PUB DATE : AT LAST, IT’S A REAL BOOK

Finally Tony’s publication date is approaching. The reviews in the trade publications (such as
Publisher’s Weekly
) are positive. The publicist tells him there’s “a nice buzz starting” with independent booksellers. Tony imagines little bees buzzing around his neighborhood bookstore, and wonders if his next book should be about vampire bees.