Write That Book Already!: The Tough Love You Need To Get Published Now (4 page)

Maintain a good e-mail/mailing list, but don’t spam people.
There are some wonderful web-based programs (for instance, Constant Contact) set up for maintaining and communicating with large groups of people. Many feature protocols that allow fans to sign themselves up via your website, and also let you import lists of contacts from other programs. Make sure you add only people who want to be on your list, and don’t drive your contacts crazy with too many e-mail blasts. Let people know how often they can expect to hear from you (once a week? once a month? every five minutes?) and expect “opt-outs” when you send more than the expected number of e-mails. Remember that everyone is busy. We all get too much e-mail, and it is an honor to be selected by the folks who sign up for your list, no matter how important you think you are. Don’t abuse the privilege, like Sam did with those fourteen people.

Start your own website, blog, Twitter, Fwix, YouTube account, Facebook page, and so on.
By the time this book is in your hands, there will no doubt be many more social-networking arenas. Do whatever you can to keep up, including (gack!) actually learning about this stuff. Having a fourteen-year-old in your life can be enormously helpful.

Pursue online publication.
Online magazines and journals, which go by various names such as e-zines and e-journals, won’t necessarily pay much (though some are fair in their compensation), but if you have patience and a fresh, flexible, and innovative approach, these publications can provide you with opportunities to get your work seen. As with traditional magazines, many of these sites cater to specific interests and audiences, such as health needs, new parents, and so on. This is a new medium requiring patience and flexibility, because it is almost certain to keep growing and evolving in the years to come.

Seek out public speaking and teaching opportunities.
Is there something you know how to do that others want to learn? Even if it has nothing to do with your book, offering your expertise in a classroom or public-speaking setting will help you get accustomed to “performing” when the time comes to read from your Pulitzer-Prize-winning novel, and that day you read the wrong e-mail and showed up at your child’s middle-school career day in your chicken costume instead of your nurse’s uniform could end up providing some great material for future books. No venue or group is too humble a place to start, and if you turn out to be a talented communicator you might be surprised at the results. If you are patient, over time people will come to know your name and seek you out.

Write for (and to) newspapers and magazines.
Max Ebb is a beloved columnist in
Latitude 38,
a monthly magazine that is popular with sailboat enthusiasts. Chances are, if you don’t sail you have never heard of Max, but if you happen to mention that you are his sister or brother-in-law (so we’ve heard) you will be treated like royalty at any yacht club bar in the San Francisco Bay Area. Max’s column is funny and well-written while dispensing clearheaded advice about sailboat racing. Max got his start at
Latitude 38
by writing hilarious (and frequent) letters to the editor. The editor liked his writing so much that he placed an ad in his own magazine asking Max to get in touch so he could get paid for his writing. This was almost thirty years ago, and Max is still not only writing his monthly column but also now threatening to turn his columns into a book. You might not be as lucky as Max, but writing letters to the editor (or posting on popular blogs) is one way to get noticed by the powers that be at a publication. Another way is to research the submission guidelines and craft a terrific pitch letter. Make sure you are familiar enough with the magazine (including content, word count of articles, writing style, and audience demographic) to pitch appropriately. Max didn’t write brilliant letters about sailboat racing to
Knitting Journal
or
Pizza Today,
and neither should you.

Present yourself as an expert to radio and television producers.
Are you an expert on the nonverbal communication patterns of African gorillas? Make sure the producers of your local radio and TV stations’ news shows are aware of this fact. Send a one-sheet press release (to the shows, not the gorillas) listing your credentials and contact information and ask to be put on the “expert list.” Then, the next time a new community of gorillas is discovered in an African jungle, they just might give you a call. Try to get a recording of your interview or appearance, and add it to your list of credentials for next time.

Do you sense a theme here? You need to be graciously self-promoting. Use your best manners, but don’t be shy and always be prepared with information at the ready when needed. Once again, no journal, newspaper, classroom, church group, website, blog, publication, or band of gorillas is too small to be worth your time when you’re starting out, and success will lead to more success. Eventually you’ll have achieved the ever-elusive and mysterious state of being: you’ll be a writer with a platform. No kidding.

FICTION VERSUS NONFICTION VERSUS MEMOIR

Are the rules different for different kinds of books? You bet they are. The submission guidelines vary considerably for fiction, nonfiction, poetry, and children’s books. But don’t be discouraged or frightened of the proposal-writing and submission process—once you settle in and start doing the work it really isn’t so bad. You need to be clear on what it is you are writing—and be prepared to patiently explain this over and over again. The rest of the world isn’t always paying attention.

YOU’VE JUST COMPLETED THE GREAT AMERICAN (OR CANADIAN, OR WHATEVER) NOVEL

The scene: a festive holiday gathering. You walk in, feeling spectacular. In the year since you’ve last seen the host of the party you’ve sold your first novel. Because these are shallow, physique-obsessed times, you’ve also worked your butt off (literally) to lose thirty pounds—or, if you are a guy, to develop those “six pack” abs (and if you are a guy, you have failed) and spent a chunk of your sizable book advance on the stunning designer outfit you’re wearing (or, if you are a guy, you sprang for a new belt and a haircut).

Tough Love from the Author Enablers

So—are you making this stuff up, or is it cold, hard truth? You’d better know the difference, and learn the rules for submitting your type of manuscript. ‹«

You’re ready to take on the world. The room is filled mostly with strangers . . . but there, holding court between the stuffed olives and the green-tea punch, you see a familiar face: Swarthmore DuLuc, wearing a festive seasonal tie and red-and-green slacks, a likeable acquaintance you run into only once a year at this event. You make a beeline for old Swarthmore because he will be good for at least ten minutes of conversation while you get your bearings.

If you are a woman (or a man who is in touch with his feminine side), the conversation might go a little like this:

You:
Hey, happy holidays.

SD:
Same to you, dear—(kisses on both cheeks)—and don’t you look smashing! Have we lost weight?

You:
Oh, maybe a pound or two.

SD:
And
who
are we wearing this season?

You:
This old thing? Just something I found in the back of the closet.

SD:
Well, you do look fetching. Tell me, my little kumquat, what have we been up to this year?

If you are a man, (or a woman in touch with her inner linebacker), it might go this way:

You:
Yo, Dude.

SD:
Whoa, what happened to you? You been sick or something?

You (wondering if your new belt is doing a better job of holding in your paunch):
Nah, I just dropped a couple of pounds.
Did you catch the game last night?

SD (sneering):
I don’t watch spectator sports. Squash is my game. I haven’t seen you around lately—what have you been up to?

You (seizing the opportunity to talk about your book):
Actually, I have some terrific news. I sold a novel and it’s going to be published in the spring. I’m very excited.

SD:
That’s wonderful! I couldn’t be happier for you—your first published novel. What’s it about? Is it fiction or nonfiction?

Aside from the fact that you can’t tell if old Swarthy is really happy for you, you’d be surprised how many people, including many of the aspiring writers who contact us at Author Enablers World Headquarters, don’t know what genre they are writing in. For instance, many people don’t understand that a novel—by definition—is a work of fiction. Or at least it’s supposed to be. Deciding on the genre of your book (fiction, nonfiction, memoir, children’s book, etc.) is important for many reasons: it will determine how the book is edited, designed, marketed, and sold.

READ THE INSTRUCTIONS: SUBMISSION GUIDELINES FOR DIFFERENT GENRES

You wouldn’t use a power tool without first reading the manual, would you? Why should preparing your proposal be any different? Although there are always exceptions (the stories about seven-figure advances given for one-page sample chapters come to mind), here are the general guidelines for submitting a manuscript.

SUBMITING FICTION

A work of fiction can be a full-length novel, a novella, a short story, even a poem (Vikram Seth wrote his first novel,
The Golden Gate,
completely in sonnet verse to avoid completing his Stanford graduate thesis in economics. Way to go, Vikram! We avoided our theses, too, though they weren’t in economics. Kathi avoided hers by writing novelty folk songs, while Sam focused on playing the harmonica, with breaks for ping pong and learning trick Frisbee throws.) Fiction’s first and foremost rule is that the work is made up, rather than history or fact. This doesn’t mean that you can’t draw from real experience or memory. It does mean that you get to use your imagination and create any story you want to.

When submitting a work of fiction, especially if it’s your first, you should have your entire manuscript completed and at least informally copyedited. Also include a story synopsis—the process of creating a synopsis may help clarify your pitch and even improve the novel itself. You’ll need to include biographical materials, and this is the time to make yourself sound as accomplished and well-known as you honestly can.

It will help your cause if you include some preliminary marketing materials:

• A list of your other published works, if any

• Comparison titles, meaning novels like yours (but not
too
much like yours) that have sold well

• Any endorsements you’ve managed to solicit from published authors or prominent figures, and/or a truthful list of potential blurbers

• If possible, some marketing information about your “platform,” or public fan base

Make sure your contact information is accurate and visible on every appropriate page.

But mostly, with fiction, you want to put your best foot forward with terrific writing and unforgettable characters engaged in an original, imaginative story. Piece o’ cake, right? We do it every day, in between playing catch with the old Frisbee while playing the harmonica.

SUBMITTING NONFICTION

A work of nonfiction tells a real story of events that actually happened. Nonfiction includes history, current events, parenting, business, memoirs, self-help, how-to, cookbooks, and so on. Nonfiction is stuff you don’t make up (and we’ve all heard the stories of those who’ve tried to pass off fiction as nonfiction).

Here are some general guideline submissions for a nonfiction manuscript from Eric Brandt, who works as a senior editor for HarperCollins Publishers. (Thanks, Eric!) These are not rules, just suggestions from a pro who looks at a lot of book proposals:

What to Include in Your Proposal

1.
One sentence description of your book (often called the keynote or hook)
“Muslim-American female reporter goes undercover on the Hajj to Mecca to discover the changing role of women in Islam.”