Young Annabelle Series: Young Annabelle, the Truth About James, What My Heart Wants (51 page)

What if he grabbed me again?

And it’s not like I was scared of him. If he thought he could intimidate me, I was going to show him that he couldn’t.

I was staying.

I know…I’m crazy.

If he wanted to get smart with me, I’d humiliate him by making up some more lies about how sensitive he was.

Yeah….that sounds like a good plan…….I hope.

I grabbed my fries and ate one. The salty grease hit my tongue and made my taste buds go crazy. It’d been awhile since I’d eaten fries. Without realizing it, my brain calculated each fry inside the carton. I wasn’t sure if I would finish the entire thing as I calculated the final number.

My phone beeped. 

I placed my bag on top of my lap and checked my phone from inside it.

My heart stopped beating once I saw Jenna’s name.

And it’s begun.

Jenna:
What are you doing?!

Annabelle:
He forced me! I didn’t want to make a huge scene running away from him in front of everyone.

Jenna:
Really?

Annabelle:
Yes! It’s the truth. He’s been hounding me since first period, claiming everything’s been one huge misunderstanding.

“Who are you texting?” James asked. I glanced up from my bag at him. His jaw was clenched tightly again as he inhaled/exhaled through his nostrils.

Was he mad?

Was he jealous?

I leaned towards him, smiling small. “None of your business.” I whispered.

He exhaled a long breath and rested his elbows on the table with his hands clasped together. He eyed me, sternly. “If you’re texting that pitcher, I swear to God, I’m driving up there and kicking his ass, right now.”

I snorted, looking away to see if Jenna texted back. “Like you would.”

She didn’t text back.

“You don’t believe me?” James raised an eyebrow. The entire table became silent.

Top news again….wonderful…NOT! 

I grimaced. “Well you’re not exactly a man of your word, so no, I don’t.” How was that for a reality check, it was time to wipe that smug look off his stupid idiot face. 

Tom and Peter’s jaws dropped. The rest of the table gasped.

James’ face didn’t change. He kept his eyes on me. It felt like he was digging at my soul. “I’m waiting.” He said, smugly. 

“Waiting for what?” I asked, confused.

“Who were you texting?” He asked again ‘calmly’. His voice sounded emotionless, but I could hear what was really simmering underneath it. He was jealous.

For the first time in public, he was showing his jealously. If I was being honest right now, it kind of felt good to know he was affected like that.

If I pushed it a little more, just so I could see his jealously come out more, I might make him angry. My brain was telling me not to lie, but my heart, it selfishly wanted him to lose it in front of everyone.

Jesus, I’m so messed up.

What was I going to do?

Screw it. It wasn’t worth it. I wasn’t that vindictive. 

I rolled my eyes and told him the truth, reluctantly. “Jenna.”

“Good.” He nodded once and eyed his boys like he made his point. The entire table burst out laughing and I hissed, looking away.

He played me! 

“Awe, look, she’s upset with you James.” Tom laughed.

“She started it.” James sneered, grabbing my hand again suddenly, pulling it into his lap. I had no energy to pull it back. Besides he’d probably tighten his grasp, so there was no point in trying to pull it back. I’d be better off using the energy to keep myself from exploding from all the stupid things they were going to say for the next forty minutes.

Honestly….I wasn’t making excuses on why I was letting him hold my hand….willingly.

I mean, it’s not like I liked how his hand felt over mine….really…honest. 

I eyed a few tables down at the hot girls, who were still staring daggers my way. Donna and Latisha had yet to show up. Maybe they were planning their revenge on my ‘presence’ kicking them off the Baseball team’s table?

Great.

I couldn’t believe I was sitting at their table…..willingly like this….like I belonged this easily.

Especially when I didn’t.

“Wonderful.” I muttered, looking away to my uneaten fries. The grease from the fries had marked the carton. It did nothing for my appetite. All I could imagine was
that grease
seeping into my veins and making the fat cells in my body expand, making me ‘fat’ again. I didn’t want be that girl from last summer again. She had no power. However, this girl right here, walked the hallways of school with a quiet swagger she never knew she had in her. She had a new body, a new look that the boys seemed to like. She had power.

I just had to make sure I didn’t go into scary territory. No matter what. I didn’t want to be
that
girl, you know, the one who couldn’t understand the concept of
control
or
eating in moderation
(the right way) because she was so focused on looking a certain way for once in her life.

Control this Annabelle. 

“Why aren’t you eating?” Tom asked, eyeing my fries.

This was it….control.

It only took a second for me to decide, as if it were an automatic response. “I’m not hungry.” I murmured, pushing my fries forward towards him, which he happily took and downed in record speed.

Well, I obviously sucked at control.

Whatever, there was still time to fix
that
issue later. I glanced at Roy who was busy eye stalking Dana. I eyed Jenna’s table, and I caught Jenna shaking her head at me. She pointed at me and said something to Dana, who was staring this way sadly.

She wanted to be where I was. Only sitting next to Roy and having him hold her hand, like James was with me.

Consensually though.

Honest.

“I’m done with that girl.” Roy muttered, shaking his head. “I’m done with her for good this time.”

What?

Roy’s eyes locked on mine “You’re done?” I asked him, feeling my heart hammer, one slow beat at a time.

He nodded slowly. “I’m tired, Anna. It’s exhausting….trying to be in a relationship. Senior year’s not supposed to be like this. We’re supposed to be having fun, not stuck in this constant cycle of misery. We’ve been suffering. I’m done doing the back and forth thing. I am done.”

“We?” I asked, and then my hand was squeezed.

“Yeah.” James whispered, gently caressing my palm with his thumb. It was making me feel things…everywhere. “We.”

I stared at him incredulously. “You aren’t allowed to say that.” I shook my head at him slowly.

His eyes widened. “Why not? It’s the truth.”

“You haven’t been suffering. You’ve been walking these halls thinking you’re big man on campus!” I screeched, pulling my hand again.

No luck, it stayed put.

James eyed his boys, probably for confirmation. “I have, haven’t I?”

“Yep.” The boys, one by one murmured in agreement.

“It’s true, Anna.” Peter nodded, eyeing Tom with a humorous glint in his eyes. “He’s been in constant pain, right Tommy boy?”

Tom grinned, nodding. “That’s right, especially yesterday when you came to school wearing that…little sexy number.”

The whole table howled like wolves, laughing.

Literally.

I could feel my face heating up.

Yesterday’s outfit wasn’t that sexy!

Was it?

Oh God!

“Damn sexy,” Peter exclaimed, wagging his eyebrows playfully. “You wanted to let your man know what he was missing out on, didn’t you?”

My eyes widened. “NO!”

“Oh he was feeling that pain yesterday,” Tom smirked.

What the hell were they talking about? How did James feel pain by me wearing that outfit yesterday?

“What pain?” I eyed James, who was chuckling to himself before eyeing me with a funny look.

“You look good today, but yesterday was something else.” Peter said. “You want your man to feel pain again, you come to school wearing those shorts again.”

Oh God…I got it!

My jaw dropped. “You guys are disgusting!”

The table howled with laughter again.

They all thought they were so smart, so suave…so hilarious. Well, they weren’t. The stupid ‘hot’ girl crew were spoiling them by laughing at all their
stupid
jokes all the time.

Even Roy was chuckling, and he was depressed.

Well….I could play too.

BOOM!

Fighting back!

I stopped fighting to pull back my hand, letting it linger on top of his knee. But this time, I pressed the back of my hand into his skin, feeling his leg stiffen in an instant.

Fighting back!

It was his turn to start feeling funny. It was his turn to feel embarrassment in front of everyone.

It was his
turn
.

For once.

“I’m so sorry I made you feel pain this week, especially yesterday. I had no idea.” I told him in mock concern. “I should take responsibility for my actions.”

His green eyes narrowed and his jaw clenched tightly again.

I smirked. “Since it wasn’t just you who was affected by me wearing that outfit yesterday.”

“Oh yeah?” James pressed, all humor gone from his voice.

I looked him straight in the eye. “Yeah.” I answered, firmly.

Peter waved his hand between us. “You two play nice. We have to behave ourselves. We’re not allowed to get into anymore fights in the cafeteria.”

“Last time was her fault.” James pointed at me, making my jaw drop.

“How was that my fault?” I shrieked.

“You were mean to James,” Tom explained.

Peter chuckled. “Yep, he was mad. Too bad for Johnny boy, he was in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“Screw that, those pussies think they’re hot shots in this school. Last I counted, they lose every game they play!” James roared, leaning his upper body over the table to high five Peter and Tom. He did all that and still had an iron grip over my hand. I wasn’t worried about my caged hand anymore, I had a new point to prove. A false claim to protest. The truth needed to be said.

I rolled my eyes. “That wasn’t my fault. That was his fault.”

“My fault!” James exclaimed as if the notion was ludacris. “How was it my fault that you wouldn’t let me talk to you in the hallway.” He pushed my hand up his leg, resting it now on his outer thigh.

Oh no, I was feeling the tingles again. That sucked. I was back to worrying about my hand again. It was getting a little too close to…you know…..
it…
and we were in public.

Not that being in public was why it bothered me. I felt funny tingles, not ‘lustful’ tingles. There was totally a difference. I mean, it’s not like, if we were somewhere private right now, that ‘this’ would actually go anywhere.

Really.

Honest.

I had to snap out of whatever it was that I was unfortunately feeling and take back control of the situation.

Before it was too late…..for the millionth time.  

“You know what you did!” I hissed at him, feeling exhausted out of my mind. But I wasn’t going to stop pushing back. I pulled my hand again. “Let go, I’m tired of this.”

James shook his head. “I told you before. I’m not letting you go.”

But you already did let me go…multiple times!
I wished I could say that to him.

Aloud. 

“He did tell you, Anna.” Peter confirmed.

“Yep!” Tom smirked.

My eyes found Roy’s. He just shrugged, eyeing me with a tiny glimmer of humor in his eyes. Then all of sudden, Roy’s eyes went past my shoulder and he murmured. “Guys.” Jerking his chin upwards. “We have company.”

James let go of my hand so he could turn and face whoever it was that decided to join us. I peeked over my shoulder and my eyes widened as a huddle of testosterone fueled ‘Men’ stood behind us. The crowd of jaw twitching ‘Men’ parted and sporting a ‘Real Madrid’ Soccer shirt, the Captain of the Royal Heights High Soccer team took his place up front, glaring daggers our way.

Johnny!

He crossed his arms over his chest and pinned his murderous glare straight at James. “Who did you just call a pussy?”

CHAPTER 41

Nobody spoke aloud, instead, a war of words were being communicated silently between James and Johnny. It was the longest ten seconds of my life. But it promptly ended as the crowd of angry Soccer players parted again, this time letting through Matthew, co-captain of the Soccer team.

“We’re waiting, bitch.” Matthew stated, not stopping as he reached Johnny, but going for that extra-long step that would put him in James’ face. An overstretched arm gated him back, digging into his rigid stance. Johnny’s arm pulled Matthew back in line with him. I gulped and eyed James, who looked un-moved by the whole thing as he relaxed with his back against the edge of the table.

James sighed loudly, tilting his head to the side at Johnny and Matthew. “For what?”

“Answer now.” Johnny barked, quietly.

James stood up and was an arm’s length away from the angry duo. They were all the same height, but that didn’t stop James. His lip twitched and he gave in, grinning big. “Oh yeah, I remember now.”

Johnny and Matthew narrowed their eyes, looking confused. “What?” They said simultaneously.

“I’m touched that you guys want to spend every waking moment with me, but I told your boy last time I don’t roll like that. I’m not going to kiss you. So quit it. No means no and I won’t stand for the two of you sexually harassing me anymore!” James stated before bursting out laughing.

My jaw dropped.

I couldn’t believe he just said that to a group of angry looking Soccer players.

A second after James’ declaration, the entire Baseball team behind us burst out laughing. Peter collapsed against the table top, laughing at the top of his lungs. His head hits my arm as his entire body spreads across the table.

“What did you just call us, you piece of shit?” Matthew growled, trying to push past Johnny’s steel arm. “Come here and say that to my face. See what’ll happen bitch, see what’ll happen!”

My heart ran a mile a second, but my body literally felt frozen from shock. Things just got serious. I knew I should have gotten up and left this between the two teams to sort out, but I couldn’t bring myself to go. Not without making sure James wouldn’t end up in another fight. His hand was already bruised from smashing into his car earlier, if he got into a fight now, he might make it worse. Then there was the whole getting caught by a teacher issue. A fight could cost him his spot on the team.

Wait a minute……why did I care?

He didn’t deserve……..these caring thoughts.

I should just let him….get into trouble.

It’s not like he was my man to worry about. He wasn’t my problem. If he got into trouble, hurt is hand, whatever, that was on him. He’d have to deal with it.

My body didn’t move.

Damn it…..

Why?

Why couldn’t I just stop…..caring? I cared about that dumbass so much and it didn’t make any freaking sense.

The laughter died down to silence and Peter climbed over the table, stepping past me to stand next to James. Tom and Roy quickly followed. Peter stood humorless, rigid in the way his body stood, ready at a moment’s notice to bring ‘honor’ back to his side. Following Peter’s, Tom’s and Roy’s lead, the rest of the Baseball players quickly got up from the table, leaving me the lone person sitting. They huddled around James and Peter, Roy and Tom.

In this moment right here, the Baseball team, as the Kings, and the Soccer team as the Knights
were battling for Cafeteria lunch time supremacy.

A standoff…..but who would win?

Deep in my heart….I knew who I wanted to win….even though I shouldn’t have.

Their voices all of a sudden got very low. However, through their inaudible mumbles, I could still feel the hostility simmering between them.

It was making me nervous.

But I was still glued to my spot on the bench. 

A light snicker waved through the Baseball team. “What did you just call me?” Johnny roared, making me jump. My heart started to pound like crazy as I stared at the back of every member of the Baseball team. All of them had stopped laughing.

All of them. 

“I didn’t call you anything. I’m just saying, it’s about time you guys found a new hobby, like, I don’t know, maybe actually practicing playing Soccer so that you’ll actually win a game?” James sneered, taking a step closer. As soon as he moved, the Kings moved too. Johnny and his Knights also took a step closer. They were practically nose to nose.

“You think you’re so funny, don’t you?” Matthew growled.

“Stop wasting my time.” James leaned forward. “I’m tired of waiting for you pussies. Are you gonna do something or not?”

A noise came from behind the Soccer team. Members of the Soccer team were being pushed to the side. All of a sudden, Becky Sloaner made her way next to Johnny. “Get out of his face you asshole!” She screeched to James, her eyes bulging.

Even though Johnny and her hadn’t come out and say they were official, she was showing her support for him. It was so obvious that they were together. They might as well come out and say it. Who knows though, maybe they weren’t anything. But, who else would prove loyalty like that, besides a girlfriend?

A loyal girlfriend stood by her man no matter the situation, demanding respect for him. That’s probably what she thought. Her logic and mine didn’t mesh. I wasn’t James’ girlfriend, so my butt stayed put. Besides, I didn’t think it was a good idea to get involved in matters of the irrational sex. Even I knew that when guys fought it was best to stay out of it. They had a showdown thing going on and how would it look if one of their ‘girlfriends’ stepped in to save them.

Just like James would say, they’d look like pussies. A light echo of snickers rippled across the Baseball team again. James, Peter, Tom and Roy all smirked with one another.

“Awe, will you look at that,” Tom cooed. “He brought in reinforcements just in case he couldn’t handle all of us.”

Peter started laughing. “You brought extra back up Johnny!”

Johnny’s eyes bulged, turning red. “No, we don’t need back up to take you guys out.”

“Your little girlfriend here says otherwise.” Roy mentioned.

“She’s not my girlfriend.” Johnny growled. My jaw dropped. I did not expect those words to come out of him. We all knew that
Becky
wanted to be with Johnny and they certainly spent a lot of time together so it seemed they were on track towards that if they weren’t already an item. But hearing him say that she wasn’t
his girlfriend
, especially after the way she put herself out there for him right here…..

That was a dick move.

Becky’s jaw dropped and her face went pale. She blinked up at Johnny, her dark brown hair falling off both her shoulders into one side. Johnny’s jaw clenched as he avoided eye contact with Becky. She took a deep breath and pushed her way back through the huddled Soccer team to her table. Her friends wouldn’t make eye contact with her as they focused on the table top. She grabbed her backpack and stormed out of the cafeteria. Before the doors shut from Becky’s hasty exit, Donna pushed into the cafeteria. She had a nasty scowl plastered across her face as she sashayed towards the hot girl table.

Guess she heard about me sitting at ‘her’ table with James.

Latisha followed behind her, looking red in the face. She wore a tight baby blue ‘shirt’ that stopped a few inches above her navel. Her stomach was small and flat.

It was smaller than mine, but it wasn’t smaller than Donna’s, who also had her stomach out in a barely there purple tank top that looked more like a large sports bra. Jenna was probably having a field day making fun of the way the both of them came to school dressed.

Not classy, but definitely with a purpose.

They were obviously on a mission.

James and Roy.

However, their grand, sex sells entrance was ruined as the guys were busy in a standoff with the Soccer team.

Tough.

The sound of Tom’s laughter interrupted my train of thought and I quickly looked back at him.

“Somebody’s in the dog house!” He laughed, joined by his fellow Baseball players. I glanced at James and he was smiling, not laughing, probably because he got it and because he was currently in the doghouse with me.

“Shut up.” Matthew growled, taking a step forward getting in the Baseball teams personal space.

“Woah there,” Peter held his hand out at Matthew. “I thought we made ourselves clear, we don’t roll like that. Stop trying to hug us.”

The Baseball team burst out laughing again. All of a sudden Donna and the hot girl crew were right next to them, also laughing.

Why was I sitting and watching this. I should have made a run for it.

But to where?

I probably was not welcome at Jenna’s table.

Heck, I was probably banned for life from her table, casted out like the traitor I was, even though I didn’t really do anything.

Nevertheless, it was my cue to leave and I only had a short amount of time before they’d all turn and notice me missing or sitting all by myself as the odd one out. I grabbed my backpack and glared at the floor, scared of catching another death glare from Jenna, and made my way into the restaurant. It was empty inside except for the lunch ladies.

“We don’t have much left.” One of them mentioned, eyeing me from behind the hot station.

“That’s okay I’ll just pick something quickly.” I told them, eyeing what was left. I ate one fry and the feeling of no food in me was beginning to make my head sway. I felt dizzy. It was for the best if I ate something, or else I’d pass out. This was me taking control of the situation.

If I passed out from lack of food, mom would be worried that I’d gone scary healthy and put me under her watchful eye again, sans weightloss diet, but weight gain diet.

I did not want to be under her watchful eye again.

Thankfully they had a few salads left. One of them was Caesar and it had bacon.

Protein.

Perfect.

I grabbed the Salad. Before making it to the cash register to pay, my eye caught a Twix chocolate bar, all alone in its box.

I could go for a candy bar today.

I grabbed it and paid for everything. I didn’t exit the restaurant, instead I halted behind the door and eyed the cafeteria from the window in the door. I quickly spotted the Baseball team and the Soccer team, they were being split up by the shop teacher again. As the Baseball team laughed their way into their seats at their table, Donna took my spot next to James. Latisha sat next to Roy who was trying not to touch sides with her. I couldn’t see Jenna’s table, but I knew Dana was in pain by seeing that.

She shouldn’t be in pain, she broke up with him. He was free to do what he wanted, even though he wasn’t doing anything.

I saw James eye the room and the rest of the boys also turning around to take a look.

Were they looking for me?

Did I want them to be looking for me?

Honestly……

I’m not even going to answer that.

All of sudden James glanced down at Donna and shook his head. She grabbed his arm, trying to pull him back down next to her, but he gently pulled his arm out of her grasp.

“She’s a Queen, James.” I whispered, staring at them. “You should be with her.”

Donna tried again to pull him down, but he stepped out of the bench and took a seat next to Peter who was in deep discussion with Tom. Donna pouted as she glared at the back of James.

It made me smile.

“You’re an idiot,” I whispered at the window, also staring at James laughing it up. “But why do I have to love you so much? It makes no sense. I should hate you with everything inside of me.”

I didn’t want to step out of the safety of the restaurant. If James saw me, then Donna would see me. I wanted no drama today. I had no energy today.

I was drained of it.

Maybe tomorrow…..but not today.

Jenna was probably fuming with me, she’d probably ignore me or yell at me. Hopefully she’d get over the anger and let me explain.

Hopefully.