Yours Book 2: Gaining Experience (Yours Series) (14 page)

S
ephora

N
ick was so right
when he said that our lives were about to get busy. I have realized just how much of a sweet bubble we have been living in with our relationship. Reality has come crashing down on me and I am not sure if I am ready for any of this.

People can be so cruel. I know Nick is a wealthy man and a public figure at times, but I never thought that would have an impact on our relationship. I never thought it would affect me.

I learned just how much of a fairy tale I have been living in. How can people that have never met me a day in their lives have so much to say about me and my relationship? Blog after blog, stupid rag after dumb rag talking crap about me and they know nothing about me.

I have been called names, torn to pieces, and lied upon since Nick decided to take our relationship public. I have shed more tears over the last four weeks than I have my whole life. I didn’t know people could be so hateful.

I know I shouldn’t read any of it but I can’t help myself. The comments they make are everywhere. Nick has forbidden me from looking at the sites and reading the shit being posted on social media, but it calls to me. I just can’t help myself.

I’ve been called ugly. Wait, let me correct that, they say that I am too ugly for Nick. They have said that I hate myself. That I have degraded myself by wearing fake contacts and European weaves. And I quote, “What is wrong with your natural hair, my sister?” “Light eyes won’t make you love herself more. He’ll just leave you for the real deal when she comes along.”

And those are the mild ones. They have said that I am too dark to actually be pretty. I’ve been called fat and unattractive to real men. One of my favorites was when I was called a filthy fat gold digger. Nick has even been called a monkey lover.

Oh, and my favorite blog post went into detail on the hatred I have for myself that has caused me to date a white man. Oh yes, I can tell you that one word for word. I had to read it a few times to believe it. It goes, and I quote.

Who is this Sephora Emilsson, everyone is talking about these days? From what I see she is no big deal. Why is it we, as black women, feel that dating a white man validates us in some way?

Nicholas Lincoln is a very handsome and wealthy man. He has accomplished a lot in the past eight years. I have followed his career, so I get the attraction when it comes to him. Looks, wealth, prestige, but aren’t there any black men for Miss. Emilsson with the same classifications.

I don’t understand why this woman hates herself so much that she has gone to great lengths to fit into the white society, instead of embracing herself. I mean, come on grey contacts. And let’s not forget that overprice weave she is wearing, that falls down her back. Come on honey. Where is your self-respect?

Nick is an educated man. If she spent as much time in the books as she has chasing that white man and becoming something she is not, then maybe an actual brother would take the time to look at her.

I read somewhere that she claims the hair and eyes are real. Psh, chick please. You are as chocolate as a Hershey bar, that is not your hair and those eyes are as fake as that ass you are sporting. I have seen other pictures of her with honey colored eyes and not grey. So really Sephora darling, who are you trying to fool?

You should love the skin you are in. If Nicholas cares about you then you could be yourself and still be with him if you really have to have a white man.

Girl bye.

-Real Sisters Speak Out

I have news for that real sister. She is the fool. I graduated Valedictorian of both my high school and college classes. In addition, I have never worn a weave in my life, and even if I did what does that have to do with the price of tea in China. I swear she sounds more bitter that I am dating Nick instead of her having that privilege.

I have never even considered Nick’s color in all the time we have dated. I don’t get what my looks have to do with my self-respect. I just can’t believe these people that watch other people’s lives from afar and think they know it all. What kind of box are they living in any way to make such foolish comments?

We have gone to fundraiser after fundraiser, movie releases, restaurant openings, name it we have done it in the last four weeks. All of those events have placed our relationship in the limelight for the world to scrutinize. Honestly, I have had enough. I’m tired of it.

I run my hand through my hair and sigh. I should be getting ready for yet another fundraiser at this very moment, but here I sit in just my corset, thigh highs and heels, with my phone in my hand. I should have been dressed a half hour ago.

Instead, I am clinching my phone fighting back tears once again. I shift on the chase lounge as I sit in the closet. This particular tweet has me stunned. Someone has shared a picture of Nick with a beautiful blonde on his arm. There is a split pic of him with me last night, at an upscale restaurant we went to for a business meeting Nick wanted me to join him for.

The caption reads.
Please Lincoln, you have done better.
I don’t know why I am letting this one get to me. Maybe it is because this is the first time I have ever seen Nick with another female. It is a reality call to me in a sort of way.

Did I really think Nick waited for me all that time without seeing anyone at all? This picture is proof that he didn’t. It looks like it is from about a year or two ago.

“Baby,” Nick’s voice breaks through my thoughts and I look up to see him standing over me.

I didn’t even hear him enter the closet. Nick reaches for my phone and a scowl covers his face. He kneels down onto the balls of his feet and cups my face. His jade eyes searching my eyes.

With a sigh, he runs his finger across my bottom lip. “Say the word and I will walk away from it all,” he says softly.

I wrinkle my brows and search his eyes. “What do you mean?”

He lifts his other hand in the air. “This house, FLI, being in the public, I will walk away. I needed to see if you can handle my world, Baby, but it looks like it is handling you. I would give it all up before I give you up,” Nick explains.

His words embed themselves in my head. The gravity of what he is saying tugs at me, but there is just one thing I can’t let go of. I understand what he is saying, but if I don’t ask it is going to drive me crazy.

“Who is she,” I ask, pointing to the phone now in his hand. I hate how small my voice sounds to my own ears.

I hate that I have let insecurity creep in when Nick does nothing but ensure that I am always the center of his attention. He always makes sure that everything he does revolves around me.

Nick gives me a knowing smile and kisses the tip of my nose. “That is Kelly Briggs–Fecteau, Kevin’s cousin. The picture is from about a year ago and if you google her name you will find a picture of her and her husband at the same function that night. You will also find that there are blogs and articles bashing her as much as they are bashing you. Believe it or not, her mother is half African American. She gets as much flak as you are getting,” Nick replies and winks.

I sigh a breath of relief. I feel silly and overwhelmed. Nick’s question plays in my head and I mull it over. Can I take this lifestyle he has introduced me to? My father was a wealthy man, but he and my mother never subjected me to the public this way. I never saw this side of our life.

I lift my eyes to look into Nick’s as he patiently waits for me. It is in the patience that I find my answer. Nick has waited four years for me and from the looks of it I was wrong. He hadn’t dated or fed his needs.

For five months he has given up his life to accommodate me. I know Nick should have been at more of these events since we have been dating but he has avoided them and I believe it is because of me. I’m starting to feel like Nick is making sacrifice after sacrifice and I do nothing but complain.

This is my man and I have made the choice to stand by him. So it needs to start with this. I will not have him walk away from the life he knows because I am being called names. In my eyes, that would be giving them all a win. These mean people don’t get to dictate my life. They don’t get to win. Not this time.

“No, no, I don’t want you to give it all up. They don’t get to tell us how to live and I trust you,” I say softly.

Nick’s face breaks into a huge smile. “Now that’s my girl. That is what I wanted to hear. You’re perfect, Baby. No matter what anyone says to you or about you. You are perfect for me and I will always belong to you because we were made for each other exactly the way we are,” Nick says before kissing my forehead. “You are ready now.”

I wrinkle my brows at him again, but he says nothing further. He lifts to his full height and pulls me to stand to my feet. Wrapping his arms around my waist, he puts his forehead to mine.

“Will you get dressed now,” Nick chuckles.

I smirk and wrap my arms around his neck. “Are you sure we have to go. I can think of a better way to spend our evening,” I purr and lift up on my toes.

Nick obliges me with a kiss, deepening it when I moan into his mouth. I get lost in his taste and the feel of his hard body against mine. Too soon he is pulling away, leaving me breathless as he chuckles.

“My sweet girl. I would love nothing more than to stay home with you. If this wasn’t one of my very own charities, we would do exactly that,” Nick says with a smile.

“And which charity is this one again,” I pout.

“It is the literacy and financial education program for underprivileged girls,” Nick says with the cutest shy smile. It is something new to see and it endears me to him ever the more. “I started it the year after I picked up your scholarship fund. This weekend will be all about them.”

Oh my God, this man is so cute.
Is he really shy about this? It is so sexy. I give him a wicked smile in return and drop into a squat in front of him. I want to show him how amazing I think he is and it can’t wait until after we return home.

I reach for his belt, unbuckling it as fast as I can. I then release his zipper. I smile when I see he is already hard beneath his boxer briefs. I peel his underwear and tuxedo pants down his legs, allowing his heavy erection to spring free.

I look up through my lashes at Nick and smile. His penis is beautiful, so much so it makes my mouth water at just the sight. Nick smiles mischievously down at me before I return my attention to his pulsing member.

Nick’s penis has the perfect mushroom tip. Not in any way disproportionate to his shaft. His dick is like a work of art, right down to the thick veins that run through it. He is the perfect length and the right girth to make his presence known, whether in my mouth or when pushing into my core.

I tilt my head to the side and lean forward as I wrap my small hand around his base. I stick out my tongue and run it along the underside of his shaft from root to tip, making sure to run it through his slit to taste his precum. I am rewarded with a hiss from between Nick’s full sexy lips. When I flick my eyes up to meet his, this time I am almost toppled over by the amount of lust I see there in his deep green orbs.

I wrap my lips around his tip and moan as I feel his silky flesh slip through my lips and against my tongue. My inner bad girl happens to come to life every time I go down on Nick. He knows I love to give him oral sex. It is so funny; I can’t say out loud the dirty words he uses for it, but I love to do it.

I don’t take my eyes off of his as I bob my head back and forth. I rest my hands on the back of his thighs for support. Nick stands with his hands at his sides. I am mentally frowning at how cool, calm and relaxed he is. Not showing a sign of losing control. This just won’t do. This is one of the only times I truly have the power to cause this powerful man before me to come undone.

I lift a brow at him as I hollow my cheeks and suck him hard. When I get to the tip I place a kiss to it, before gliding back over his shaft relaxing my throat and taking him as far as I can. Nick groans, but that is not enough. I double my efforts deep throating him and sucking harder.

“Oh fuck,” Nick growls, his jaw going lax and his head falling back. His hands shoot into my hair in a tight hold. “Shit, baby, just like that.”

I slide my hands up to his rock hard ass and hold on tight as he starts to rock his hips and fuck my mouth. I moan and hum around him, watching as his head drops back down to look at me. To watch me just the same. He licks his lips and I know he wants to have his own taste, but I’m in control for once.

To prove my point, I swirl my tongue around him. “Fuck, what happened to my innocent girl,” Nick growls. His eyes grow wide with awe. “You suck cock like a fucking pro and it drives me insane to know that I will be the only man to ever know that.”

I feel my chest burst with his compliment. I just want to please him the way he pleases me. I use my right hand to reach for his balls and massage them. Nick groans and his hips start to jerk unsteadily. I can feel him swelling in my mouth.

I release his balls and apply light pressure right behind them with my fingertips just like he showed me to. His fingers tighten in my hair and I know he is about to come.

“Yes,” Nick hisses. “Take it all.”

And I do. From the first jet of come that shoots down my throat to the very last. When he is done filling my mouth with his hot seed, I lick him clean before letting him pop free from my mouth.

Nick grabs my chin between his thumb and forefinger, lifting me to stand at my full height before him. He crushes my swollen lips with his, squeezing my rear with his free hand. I grab ahold of his hair, keeping him in place when he tries to pull away.

Nick chuckles breathlessly, tapping my ass to convey that he wants me to free him. I whimper, but loosen my grasp. I pull away with a pout on my lips. I know he is about to tell me that my playtime is up. We need to get ready to leave.

“Alright, alright,” I grumble, “I will be ready in twenty minutes.”

“Make that fifteen,” Nick laughs and presses a kiss to my forehead.