Zombie Rules (Book 4): Destiny (44 page)

“Like I said, I don’t have everything listed. If there’s anything in particular you’ve got an itching for…” he finished with a wave of his hand toward the contents of his van. At his urging, I stepped closer and peered inside. One item jumped out at me immediately. He had bananas, several of them. I pointed.

“Are those real?” I asked. He grinned again, this time like a fisherman who’d just hooked a trophy bass.

“They most certainly are, grew ‘em myself.” I didn’t know how he was able to grow bananas in this climate, but didn’t really care. They looked mouthwatering.

“They’re for sale,” he continued, “but they ain’t going to be cheap. A case of ammo ought to do it, any caliber is fine.” I frowned at him. His smile continued.

“Mister Joe, if it’s okay with you, I’m going to bring my people up. We’re friendly enough and will police our own if there are any transgressions, okay?”

“Sure thing, friend.”

“Good, please let your snipers know.” His smile tightened for a microsecond, but it relaxed again as he once more casually slapped his hands. Jorge and I rode back to the group, who had mostly all gathered around the armored vehicle while Josue provided rear security.

I looked around, trying to make it seem casual, and after a minute I spotted what I was looking for, a slight mound in the bushes directly perpendicular to where our armored vehicle was parked.

“Damn,” I muttered, wondering what the odds would be that we’d stopped our convoy precisely at the point where Joe’s sniper was hiding.

“What?” Jorge asked.

“Nothing,” I responded and waited for him to stop the bike before jumping off. Once he killed the engine, I addressed everyone.

“Alright, his name’s Joe and he’s running a makeshift trading post. He’s got a few things, but he’s being totally unrealistic in his valuation.” I explained about the bananas and what he demanded in trade.

“So, my suggestion is, we ride up, exchange pleasantries, and then move on.” Seth started to say something, but stopped when Raymond raised his hand.

“Ah, Zach, let’s not be so hasty about riding off without trying to do some business. Do you know who’re the best salesmen in the world?” he asked and then answered his own question. “Politicians of course, and I’ve been around the best of them and the worst of them most of my life.” He looked around at all of us.

“My parents were career diplomats with the state department. If I may be so bold, let me do the haggling, I guarantee we’ll come out ahead. Now, tell me, what do we have that we’d be willing to trade those bananas for?” I thought for a moment.

“Since our makeshift refrigerator went tits up, those steaks are not going to last very much longer. And, of course, we have plenty of honey and beeswax.” Raymond smiled gleefully in anticipation.

“Perfect. Leave it to me and we’ll all be eating bananas within the hour.”

“He
is
a pretty good bullshitter,” Sheila commented. Her husband guffawed in agreement.

“It couldn’t hurt to try,” Seth said.

“I haven’t eaten a banana in, well shit, since I was in a banana-eating contest at a strip club outside of Fort Polk,” Rachel remarked. There was some light laughter as Sarah looked at her questioningly. It was decided.

“Alright, Raymond, let’s see what you can do.” I motioned to Seth. “Let me borrow those binoculars for a minute, if you don’t mind.” Seth looked at me inquisitively as he handed them to me.

“Something else going on?” he asked.

“I’m going to give Sammy an impromptu training lesson,” I replied and motioned for Sammy to follow me. “Y’all go ahead; Sammy and I will be there in a few.” I got a couple of curious looks, but everyone except Seth loaded up and moved the convoy down the hundred yards to where Trader Joe was patiently waiting for us.

“Okay, curiosity has gotten the best of me. You mind if I sit in on this training?” he asked with a grin.

“Sure.” I waited until everyone left and then gestured at Sammy.

“Take these binoculars, look down that way and tell me what you see,” I directed in a low voice. He brought the binoculars up to his eyes and peered down the interstate.

“I see that Trader Joe man and his van, and everyone gathering around him. He’s giving everyone fist bumps; I guess he doesn’t like shaking hands.”

“Okay, describe him.”

“Uh, well, he’s older. He’s white, he’s got a beard that has a lot of gray in it.”

“How tall is he?”

“I can’t tell.”

“That van he’s standing beside is a full-size van. A full-size van is about seven feet tall. Use it as a reference. Now, how tall is he?”

“Six feet?”

“Yep. Now, how far away from us is he?” Sammy bit his lower lip as he continued staring through the binoculars. He finally lowered them and looked at me in confusion.

“Remember when I showed you how to estimate distances by imagining the length of a football field?” He nodded in sudden understanding. “How many football fields away are we?”

“Maybe two?” he answered uncertainly.

“Not bad, not bad at all. Now, here’s something else to look at.” I pointed back down the interstate. “Do you see that orange rock lying on the side of the road about halfway down?” He nodded. “It kind of seems odd looking, doesn’t it? A rock with bright orange paint on it, sitting out there all by itself.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, good. Now, if you look close you’ll see a little flag tied on that CB antenna on the van and another one tied onto the top of his umbrella.”

“Yeah, I see them,” Sammy replied. “The wind is pretty gusty today.”

“We’ve talked about this before, right?” Sammy nodded in understanding.

“That flags shows a sniper where the wind is blowing from.”

“And what about the orange rock?” He furrowed his brow in confusion and looked at it again with the binoculars. I gave him a hint.

“How far away is that orange rock from us?”

“Halfway?”

“Yep, so how far is that?”

“A hundred yards.” You could see the wheels turning in his head before his face lit up in understanding.

“Someone put that rock there as a distance marker.” He looked through the binoculars again. “And there’s another one a hundred yards on the other side of Mister Joe.”

“Yep, they’re range markers. So, what does that tell you?”

“There’s a sniper out here,” he exclaimed in hushed understanding. I heard Seth inhale some air. Sammy started looking around intensely. Suddenly, his mouth dropped open and he pointed at the small mound of bushes. I silently nodded, and I think the two of them finally noticed I had my Kimber forty-five out of its holster and holding it down by my side. I gave a tacit warning to Seth, who nodded in understanding, and began speaking out loudly.

“Sniper, I know your duty is to protect Joe, but I’d feel a heck of a lot better knowing you aren’t pointing that rifle at my friends. Why don’t you stand up and we’ll walk down there together and join everyone.” He didn’t respond, instead, he continued lying perfectly still, the tip of the barrel barely sticking out of the bushes was the only sign he was there.

“I know you can hear me, so let’s not sit here all day in the heat.” Actually, the steady breeze made it pleasant out, but I knew from experience that lying prone in a ghillie suit hiding in a bunch of weeds and bushes all day was mighty uncomfortable. Yet, there was still no movement or response. I glanced at Seth, who gave a slight shrug. We were at an impasse. I didn’t want any violence, but this sniper was trying my patience.

“Well, I guess I’m mistaken. Fellas, I need to pee first and then we’ll go down and join everyone. You know what, I think I’m going to piss all over that spot where I’m imagining a sniper is lying down.”

“Yeah,” Seth added. “I’ll join you, my bladder is about to burst.” It took maybe two seconds now before the small mound began moving and a figure in a ghillie suit slowly stood up.

“Please keep your weapon pointed down,” I said. He did as I suggested, but even through the camouflage I could sense a tenseness. I kept my handgun pointed at the ground, but I wasn’t quite ready to holster it just yet.

“I’m Zach, this is Captain Kitchens with the United States Army, and my buddy here is Sammy.” I gestured toward the others. “We’re travelling through here and not looking for trouble with anyone. I hope you can see that.” The sniper reached up and pulled his headgear off. When he did so, Sammy gasped.

“Zach, that sniper’s a girl!” I don’t know why, but I was as surprised as he was. Her face was painted in various shades of olive drab, but there was no mistaking the feminine features. Her hair was a wild mess of mahogany brown and a pair of bright hazel green eyes glared at us. Seth chuckled.

“Well, this is turning into an interesting day. What’s your name, ma’am?” he asked.

“Riley,” she answered in a somewhat defiant tone.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Riley. C’mon, let’s join the rest of them,” I suggested.

As we walked down the interstate, Seth and I tried to make small talk with her. She wasn’t having any of it though and walked along in silence. As we approached Trader Joe and his van, he stopped talking with everyone and started jogging toward us, worry etched on his face. I holstered my handgun and held my hands out in front of me.

“Mister Joe, there’s no cause for alarm, right, Riley?” He glanced at me for a microsecond before focusing on Riley.

“What happened?” he asked her.

“They spotted me,” she replied and glared at me again briefly. “I’m sorry, Dad.” Seth laughed and then caught himself. I spoke up quickly.

“Joe, you can see we haven’t done anything to your daughter, so would you do me a favor?” I asked, to which he focused on me suspiciously. “Would you make that hand signal to your other sniper letting them know everything is okay? You know, swinging your arms and slapping your hands together, would you please do that so nobody gets shot by accident?” Joe stared at me a second, frowning.

“Was it that obvious?” he asked before his smile returned and he gave the signal.

“Looks like we need to work on our tactics. Come on, let’s go have a seat and jaw at each other a while.”

“So, how did you know?” Joe asked Seth. Seth shook his head and hooked a thumb at me.

“Don’t look at me; Zach’s the one who figured it out.” Joe looked at Seth a moment, as if to see if was being bullshitted, before directing his gaze at me expectantly. I saw Kelly looking at me and her expression may have been one of pride at my astuteness or it may have been a silent admonishment not to go acting like a know-it-all. I took both interpretations to heart.

“I guess your casual demeanor was the big tip off.” I gestured toward everyone with a wave of my hand.

“I mean, here’s a convoy driving up the road with an armored vehicle leading the pack, and yet, you didn’t seem particularly antsy about it.” The orange rocks, the flags, the hand signals, all of those clues helped, but Kelly was right, no reason to let on that I spotted all of that. There was no need to brag.

“How in the heck did you find Riley though? I had her hidden pretty good, and trust me, I’ve had a lot of experience in that particular area.” I shrugged and glanced at Riley, who had stripped out of her ghillie suit and was now wearing a pair of short camouflage shorts and a skimpy brown tank top.

She was a little on the petite side, skinny but toned. She’d wiped most of the camo off of her face, which revealed a very cute girl in her late teens, but she must have been hunkered down for quite a while because she was covered in sweat and grime and wasn’t smelling very pleasant at the moment. In addition, her unshaven legs had several mosquito bites.

And, it was obvious she wasn’t wearing a bra. I pretended not to notice, but those idiot brothers were staring unabashedly. Even Jorge was staring, which kind of embarrassed me. After all, Joe was no dummy, he had to have noticed as well, but he ignored it.

“You got lucky,” Riley contended in a husky voice. The glare was toned down, but it was still present. I nodded in agreement.

“Yes, we did. Sammy here has good eyesight and he happened to spot the tip of your rifle barrel peeking out.”

“Well, my son is undetected as yet and I think I’ll leave him out there, just in case. No offense.”

“None taken,” Seth replied.

“So, you guys never said where you’re heading,” Joe casually queried. I glanced at Seth.

“Mount Weather,” he replied. Joe nodded.

“I had an inkling.”

“You know of Mount Weather?” Raymond asked, to which Joe gave another small nod.

“How so?” Raymond pressed.

“My father used to work for the government,” Riley said. Joe gave her a look. She ignored him and spotted Kelly, who was over by the Volvo watching as Frederick peed on a tire. Callahan was not to be outdone and hiked his leg on it as well. I hoped I wouldn’t need to change that tire anytime soon. At least little Zoe trotted off into the weeds before squatting.

“Who is she?”

“That’s my - that’s my wife, Kelly, and my kids.”

“I think I’d like to say hello.” Riley promptly lost interest in us and walked over to her. I watched as Kelly smiled and the two of them immediately began what appeared to be a friendly conversation.