Zombies and Shit (15 page)

Scavy tried to pull the knife out of his hand, but it was jammed into the table pretty good. He just sighed and shook his head at Poppy, his blood on her nostril. When you’re friends with a crazy unpredictable bitch, you’ve got to take the good with the bad.

They started dating, for a while, but both of them knew that wasn’t going to stick. Popcorn wasn’t the type to get serious with anyone for very long. She just gets bored too easily. But Scavy relates to that. He’s the exact same way.

A couple of days ago, Scavy told her, “So I think we should break up and shit.”

And all she did was shrug, and said, “Yeah, sure. You wanna do a line?”

“Yeah.”

And that was it

As Scavy watches Popcorn shiver and spit, he taps the bottom of his spear against the concrete roof. Junko notices that he’s finally come to terms with his friend’s condition. She goes to him.

“We have to take care of her,” Junko says, holding up the 9mm. “Before she changes.”

Scavy nods a few too many times. “Yeah, okay.”

“I’ll do it if you want,” Junko says.

“No, I’ll do it,” Scavy says, reaching for the gun.

“Make sure she doesn’t see it coming,” Junko says, blocking the sight of the handoff from his girlfriend. “It’ll be easier for her that way.”

“Yeah. Easier.”

“Shoot her before she even knows what’s going on.”

“Yeah, I can do that.”

“Okay,” Junko says, and pats him on the shoulder. “I’m sorry…”

Then he turns to Popcorn. He takes a deep breath and points the gun at her. A smile appears on his face as he gets a funny idea for how to handle this.

“Hey, Poppy,” he says.

She looks up at him.

“Think fast.”

Then he shoots her in the face.

“What the fuck, Scavy?” Popcorn says to him, as blood drips from the bullet hole in her forehead.

The other three just stare at her.

“Umm…” Scavy leans over to Junko. “She didn’t die.”

Popcorn wipes her forehead and then looks at the blood on her fingers. “You think that’s funny, asshole?”

“She’s already turned,” Junko says, taking the handgun from the punk and pointing it at the punk chick.

Poppy looks behind her at the blood on the wall, then she stands up and goes to them. “You’re such a dick.”

“Stay back!” Junko says.

Popcorn stops. Junko isn’t sure if she even knows what is going on.

“Why isn’t she trying to eat our brains?” Rainbow asks.

Junko shakes her head. “I have no idea.”

Scavy knows why she isn’t hungry for brains. It’s because Popcorn doesn’t get hungry for anything. Ever since he knew her she has been that way. She had done so much Waste growing up that it had destroyed the nervous tissue in her stomach and through much of her body. She could eat all she wanted and never feel the sensation of being full or she could starve herself for weeks and never get hungry.

That was why she was so skinny. She didn’t ever get hungry for food. She never even had cravings for food. The act of eating to her was just chewing a flavorless substance and then depositing it inside of her body. If she didn’t get weak and tired from lack of food she would have just stopped eating altogether. Now that she’s a zombie, it’s not any different.

“So what do we do?” Rainbow asks.

“We can’t take her with us,” Junko says.

“But I’m fine,” Popcorn says.

“We don’t know if you’re going to stay fine,” Junko says. “And, besides, you’re still infectious.”

Popcorn sticks her pinky finger in her bullet hole and then pulls it out again, then smiles as if the act is amusing.

“But it would be cruel to just leave her here…” Scavy says.

Junko says, “You put a bullet in her head like it was a joke, but you think leaving her is cruel?”

“I don’t want her coming with us,” Rainbow says.

“Well, I think she should,” Scavy says.

“Two to one,” Junko says. “She stays. Trust me, it’s for the best.”

They look at her smelling the brain blood on her finger. She tastes it. The taste of brain makes her cringe.

“Besides,” Junko says. “She’s a zombie now. All the other zombies will treat her like one of them and leave her alone. She’ll most likely survive longer than any of us.”

“Hey, yeah,” Scavy says. “That’s kind of fucking badass. She’ll be like the queen of the zombies.”

“But I don’t want to be the queen of the zombies,” Popcorn says. “I want to kill zombies, with you.”

Scavy shakes his head. “We’ve got to go on without you.”

“This is bullshit,” she says.

“Come on.” Scavy puts his arm around her shoulder. “It’s going to be awesome. You’ll have the entire wasteland to yourself. You can wreck shit up all you want.”

“What if I start to rot like the others?” she says. “I don’t want to be just bones and slime.”

“Fuck it,” he says. “Just have fun with it.”

“But I don’t want to be alone.”

Scavy looks back at the others who are waiting for him to leave. Junko looks so impatient that she might punch the camera ball floating next to her.

“What about Brick?” Scavy says. “He’s a zombie too, now. Maybe the two of you can hook up again and rule the wasteland together. That is, unless you have a problem with his looks being uglier than usual.”

Poppy laughs. “Well, half his face is gone, but he did look pretty hot in those pink combat boots.”

“That’s the spirit,” Scavy says.

“Let’s go,” Junko yells. “Now.”

“I got to go,” Scavy says.

He hugs her and steps back.

“I should eat your ass for leaving me like this,” she says.

“Say hi to Brick for me.”

Popcorn waves to him as he goes, her bloody tendon dangling from her wrist, swaying back and forth. Then she looks out across the wasteland, imagining it as her new kingdom.

Before Scavy enters the building, he calls out to her. “Hey, Poppy.”

She looks back.

“You look pretty hot with that bullet hole in your head.”

She flips him off.

He smiles, then follows after the others.