Highland Secrets (English Edition) (15 page)

Adam
dropped me roughly into his bed and I groaned because my stomach tightened painfully.

“You can use my bathroom if you … well you know. That’s why I brought you into my room. It is a shorter distance from here.” He pointed to the
narrow door in the corner with his head. “And don’t think about leaving the room”, he mumbled. I’ll be in the room opposite. I’m going to work for a little longer.”

“Wait”, I
moaned weakly because the nausea was making its presence felt in my insides again. “What did the police say?” I wasn’t asking because I felt sorry for Adam, but because I was curious. I had to know whether I had to spend the night next to a murderer. I could ask him about the video, but would he admit to me that he had sent it, if he had done it? It was probably best to keep it to myself for the time being as my cell phone was broken and I didn’t have any evidence anymore.

“Not much. They
are going to get a search warrant. I told them I have nothing to hide. They are welcome to search the estate right now. There is no evidence against me. Only the fact that I had sex with these women.” I felt a tightening sensation in my chest. Was it the way in which he was unmoved when he said it? “It is not yet a crime to have sex in this country.”

I nodded
pretending to show understanding and I sank back into the pillows. They had Adam’s smell and unintentionally I took a deeper breath. Adam grinned. He had noticed what I had done.

“You are not leaving this room”, he stressed again and then went.

I desperately tried to find a solution to my dilemma. But there wasn’t one. I was too weak to flee. And Adam would never let me go.

I must have fallen asleep because when I woke up, Adam’s arm lay on top of my stomach and his face was on my shoulder. Somebody was knock
ing agitatedly at the door. It was Alfred.

“Mr
. MacLeod! Wake up! The police are at the door.”

Alarmed, I nudged Adam in his side.
He looked lovely when he was asleep. His facial features were completely relaxed. I couldn’t believe that this man was the ripper, but I had reason to have doubts. Was I mad? The man was sleeping next to me and the police were waiting downstairs. If I ever had a chance to get away, this was it.

I lifted Adam’s arm slowly from my body.
He made a noise in protest and then opened his eyes. I cursed to myself. The knocking at the door hadn’t woken him up nor had me nudging his side, but me lifting up his arm made him open his eyes!

He reached out for my arm to hold me back. “How are you?”

“Better”, I said concisely. “The police are here.”

»Aye,
why the hell not”, he mumbled, got up and grabbed his jeans.

I also crawled out of bed carefully.
I definitely didn’t want to appear weak by wobbling. Adam would never let me go otherwise. At some point during the night, he must have taken off my pyjama top. I was wearing one of his shirts. Adam looked at me with a smile on his face. “It really suits you.” He looked at my thighs. “A bit too long maybe though.”

I felt a tingling sensation go through my lower abdomen
. A potential serial killer was standing in front of me and all I wanted to do was wrap my legs around his waist and rub myself against him like a cat on heat.

“Why did you undress me?
”, I asked angrily instead.

“Yesterday you were still happy for me to undress you
.” He looked at me and my eyes were burning with desire. I started to get goosebumps on my arms. I couldn’t say whether it was down to fear or because his dark glance aroused me.

Adam
moved towards me quickly and put his arms around me. He looked deep into my eyes. “I am still not finished speaking with you.” I shivered. Adam let me go and went out the door.

I went to my room and packed my things in my suitcase as fast as I could. I was annoyed at myself because I was so
reluctant to trust Adam. And at the same time, I felt the urge to pack my suitcase even quicker. I would be able to contemplate whether Adam was a murderer or not in London. But why did it hurt me so much to think that I would never see him again? I swallowed the lump in my throat. Tears were burning in my eyes and I was overcome with despair. And I realized that I didn’t really know why I was in such a hurry to go. Because Adam might be a murderer? Or because my feelings for him had gotten out of control?

I wanted to pack my broken cell phone, but it wasn’t on the bedside table. Where
had it gone? Had Adam hidden it? What if he had lied and it wasn’t actually broken. What if he was just trying to stop me getting away from him? Or Molly had disposed of it. It was most probably Molly, I convinced myself.

I left my half packed suitcase and went downstairs to ask Molly about the cell phone. I needed the SIM card at least. And maybe it could even be repaired?
A number of police officers were wandering through the house. All the doors were open, even the door to the basement. Raised voices could be heard everywhere. Alfred was stood next to Adam in the foyer to the living room and Molly walked out of the kitchen. When she heard me coming down the stairs, she turned round and came back shortly after with a cup of tea.

“Drink this”, she commanded and looked even more ferocious than she usually was. Adam looked tense and wrinkles had formed around his eyes and the corners of his mouth and it was as if he had aged by years in the last few minutes.
I almost felt sorry for him. I shook my head angry at myself. He might be a murderer, I cried to remind myself.

I glanced into the living room. Two men in uniforms were tearing open cupboards
, throwing books and papers onto the floor and moving furniture around. Yes, I did actually feel sorry for Adam. While I drank my tea, I thought about what would be the best way of possibly leaving the estate with the police officers. The most inconspicuous way would be to leave before them. But first of all I would have to call for a taxi. I reached out for the telephone that was supposed to be on a chest of drawers next to me. It wasn’t there. Where had it gone? Out of desperation, I tried to think whether I had seen it anywhere.

“As soon as everything is over with here, I’ll get Alfred to drive you home”, said Adam with a frosty tone in his
voice which I could feel physically. I rubbed my upper arms and looked up at Adam, but he was just standing there with his hands in his trouser pockets and was still bare-chested and observed with an uptight look on his face how the strangers were turning his house upside down. When I looked at his naked chest, memories flared up in me of how affectionate he had been and of how demanding he could be. I thought about the taste of his skin and lips, his masculine scent and his eyes that had looked at me lovingly while he was inside me. My nerve endings felt as if they were burning and I longed for his touch. I looked away swallowing heavily and nodded in agreement.

He let me go. Adam may have been cold sometimes and distant and the way in which
he treated women was anything but exemplary, but was he really capable of committing such acts? I shook my head mentally. Even if there was already a knot in my stomach at the thought that I would be leaving him very soon, I was relieved that I was getting away from here. I was now one of the women who had slept with Adam. And I didn’t want to allow myself to become the next victim. I would be better off in London.

After the police had searched every corner of the estate and finished looking around the distillery, I packed my things and came down the stairs with my suitcases where Adam was having a word with Alfred.
I felt a pulling sensation in my chest and I was breathing heavily. I knew that it wouldn’t be easy for me to say goodbye. Adam looked at me as I stood in front of him, but if I had expected some sort of reaction from him, I would have been wrong. His face was expressionless. You could only see the tiredness and tension in his face and he was even trying to hide that.

He held out his hand to me and I reached out for it. The touch went through me
like an electric shock which ended with butterflies in my stomach. I had fire in my eyes, so I decided to avoid his gaze because I didn’t want him to see that the farewell was causing me pain. He was letting me go? Would the ripper do the same? I really wanted him to be innocent. Yet, I was scared of him. I had to get away from here.

“Don’t
worry about the unfinished paintings. Maybe you’d like to come back when everything here is over with. Or you can just leave it”, he added.

“Goodbye Adam”
, I said hoarsely. Alfred took my suitcase and walked ahead. A dark limousine was already waiting in front of the house. Perhaps it was a Mercedes? I couldn’t be bothered to check. I really wasn’t interested. Adam opened one of the back doors for me and I got in without looking at him again.

When I arrived back in London, an acceptance letter was waiting for me from a small museum who I had already worked for occasionally during my training. The work may not be particularly well paid, but at least I would be able to gain the expected level of experience that the major museums required. With the acceptance letter and my suitcases in my hand, I climbed up the few steps to my small apartment.

I left the suitcases in the
tiny corridor, took five steps towards the living room and dropped down on the sofa. I closed my eyes and let out a contented groan. Finally home. My muscles started to relax more and more with every breath I took. I started to repress the memories I had of the Highlands and with it any thoughts about Adam. After a long bath, I fell into my bed and slept through until the following morning.

Before I went to my new
place of work to find out everything I needed to know, I spoke on the telephone with my grandmother, told her about the estate, the paintings and all the other insignificant details and kept quiet about Adam and the murders.

“I hope you
went about your work diligently”, she said with the admonishing tone that she had always used during my childhood. I could literally see her in front of me with her long grey hair pinned up in a bun. She wore a dark, elegant slim fit suit and had a gloomy and calculating expression on her face.

“I did my best as always”
, I answered and rolled my eyes. How could I do anything else but give my best? After all, she ensured that giving everything was in my blood. “I’ve found a job”, I interjected. I didn’t do this to earn praise or recognition. But maybe I did. However, I just knew that that would never happen. There was no pleasing Alice. No matter what I did. However, our relationship didn’t just suffer because of this, but also because I didn’t know anybody as cold and controlling as her.

She never took me in her arms as a child. Most of the time she didn’t even look at me. Growing up in such an unemotional home was really hard for me. But every time I looked in the mirror, I knew why she didn’t
have the heart to look at me or to love me. It was because I looked like my mother, her daughter. So what I loved about myself, she detested. I was proud of being so similar to my mother and she hated me because I caused her even more grief. When I finally moved out, without saying anything we agreed to keep our contact to a minimum. A minimum meant that I called her or visited her on her birthday.

“Where is this job?
”, she enquired.

“At the Brown Museum of Art.”

“That small, insignificant museum where you’ve worked before?”

Insignificant. She couldn’t let it go. “Yes, the insignificant museum”
, I said, biting my tongue. “It may be small and unknown, but I will be able to gain the experience there that I need to be accepted for more notable positions.”

“Just be careful that you don’t get stuck in a rut there.”

“I will”, I said tersely and put the phone down. Everything had been said that needed to be said. We wouldn’t speak to each other again over the next few weeks. It was always like that. Even if we hadn’t had an argument. I was really happy about our arrangement. She meant just as little to me as I did to her.

“I heard that I’ll now be seeing you more often”, said Tom welcoming me to the museum. He was stood on a ladder and was just putting up an advertising banner for a
planned exhibition. Tom was around my age. He had dark brown hair, was more wiry than thin and he looked really good. Whenever I had worked here, he had always flirted with me. And I wasn’t opposed to it. Looking at him now reminded me of Adam and I forced down the lump that was starting to form in my throat.

“Yes, it looks like that”, I answered as cheerfully as I could. Tom looked down
and gave me a warm, friendly smile.

“I’m looking forward to it.
Maybe we could spend some time together in the bistro during our breaks”, he said winking. I felt my face warm up, gave a brief nod and rushed into the Director’s office. Tom had a way about him that always made me feel disconcerted. But I liked him and his honest and open character.

I was finished in the office in ten minutes. My first working day wouldn’t be for a month. That was still a while off, but I would find something to do to keep my mind off of the events
on the Isle of Skye.

When I came out of the office, Tom was stood in front of me smiling. “What a coincidence, I am just about to go on break”, he said with a broad grin on his face. He had a really nice grin, I thought. But it wasn’t as handsome as the grin Adam had occasionally given me. I
cast off the memories and looked at Tom with a radiant smile even if I didn’t really feel like it. But I needed some sort of distraction.

“What a coincidence, I have some spare time”, I replied smiling.

“Right then, let’s go.” Tom held his arm out towards me and I linked arms with him. “You’re welcome.”

“
What kind of exhibition is that on the banner?” I took a sip of my tea. I still hadn’t fully recovered from my stomach pains which is why I decided it was best to drink something easy on the stomach.

“It is the portrayal of angels evolving through the centuries, it’s a traveling exhibition”, Tom said concisely. “So when will I get to enjoy your company on a regular basis?”

“In one month.”

“Then I’
ll start counting the seconds.” He said and winked at me.

“How is your wife?
”, I asked to deter him from giving me these playful looks.

“Which wife?
”, he asked innocently. “Oh, you mean my ex-wife? As chance would have it, I am free for you.” He put his hand on mine and looked deep into my eyes.

“Stop it
”, I said pretending to be indignant. “Haven’t you ever heard of the strict rule?

He held his
cake fork loaded with chocolate gateau in front of my nose and I refused it. “I have an upset stomach at the moment.”

“What rule
”, he said broaching the subject further.

“That relationships between work colleagues are forbidden.”

“No, I’ve never heard of it. And even if this rule existed, nothing could stop me trying it on with a girl like you.” Tom put the fork into his mouth and let out a groan of pleasure. “You’re missing out.”

We chatted for a few more minutes and I liked the relaxed atmosphere between us. I was looking forward to working with him soon. Maybe we would become friends. I could really use a friend. It would be great if I had somebody who was also nice to me for a change. Since I always focused on my studies, I had never had the opportunity to establish friendships.

My next trip took me to the p
rofessor’s lawyer. Mr. Ferguson had actually looked after everything in my absence. The money had gone into my account just two days after my departure.

A slightly peeved Mrs
. Ferguson again opened the door to me. Her suit of the day was lime green. It was a color I would have never been able to wear, but it suited her. “Ms. Sands?”, she said astounded. She gazed at my clothing as she did the first time. I was wearing a black pencil skirt and a matching short jacket.

“I would like to have a quick word with your husband if that’s possible.”

“Do you have an appointment?”

I looked past her at the door to the office and pursed my lips. “I’m afraid not, but it is really important.”

“It’s not really possible without an appointment”, persisted Ms Ferguson and turned her nose up at me indignant at the audacity I was showing.

“I promise it will only take five minutes.”

“Then come on in. I’ll check if he has time to see you.”

“Thank you, Mrs
. Ferguson”, I said politely even if I didn’t feel like being polite.

Mr
. Ferguson had time and he welcomed me warmly and courteously as usual. “Ms. Sands, what a surprise. I hope it went well for you in Scotland.”

It hadn’t gone well and I was still fighting my feelings for Adam. I longed for him, for his kisses and for his touch. And I was worried about switching
the television on or opening the newspaper and finding out that Adam MacLeod was the ripper of Dunvegan. Sometimes I even thought that it might be better if he was the ripper because I could then move on from him. At least that was what I told myself. And if I didn’t do that, then I suppressed any thoughts I had about Adam and also blocked out the disappointment I felt that it didn’t seem to matter to him that I was leaving. He seemed to be completely unmoved.

“Yes, it was very nice”, I said evasively. “I just need a little bit of your time.”

“No, no. That’s fine. Let’s have a cup of tea.” Mr. Ferguson didn’t even wait to hear my answer. He walked around his desk and called his wife using the intercom to say that we would like to have tea. I smiled fiendishly deep down when I imagined the angry face of Mrs. Ferguson.

“Let
’s take a seat”, he instructed and pointed to the armchairs in front of the warm fireplace. He sorted through a few documents while we waited for his wife. When she had left us again, he put the file down on his lap and took a sip of the steaming hot tea. He then put the cup down on the table again and sighed. “So, now we are ready. Was something not to your satisfaction?”

“Oh, no. Everything is fine. I just came to ask you to take back some of the money. I wasn’t able to complete the work unfortunately. There were a few …”
I hesitated. How should I put it? The professor’s son was suspected of being a serial killer? “There were a few complications. I had to depart due to unforeseen circumstances. It would not be right to keep hold of all the money.”

“Adam treated you well, didn’t he?
”, enquired the lawyer with raised eyebrows.

“Yes, he was very … nice.”
And I don’t think that he’s the ripper, I added in my head. Would he have let me go otherwise? If he was the ripper, he would have stuck to his previous actions and would have killed me after I had slept with him.

“
Ms. Sands. The professor was very precise in his instructions. No matter what happened, he wanted you to receive the money. So keep it and consider it as an investment from your professor into your career.”

“But”, I was about to
speak, yet Mr. Ferguson shook his head frantically.

“I won’t take it back. It belongs to you.” He gave me a serious look and his gaze said that he would not put up
with any further discussion. Feeling awkward, I took a sip of my tea. My stomach let out a loud rumbling sound and I flinched. Mr. Ferguson was polite, ignored the noise and drank his tea. Maybe it was time to have a little bite to eat. Since I had left Scotland, I had had nothing but tea and a thin soup.

I finished drinking my cup of tea a
nd accepted with a somewhat uneasy feeling that I would have to keep the money. Maybe I would donate some of it to the museum. That would make me feel better.

When I finally got home, a package
notification was waiting for me in my mailbox. I hesitated because I couldn’t imagine who would send me a package and I hadn’t ordered anything either. I rang my neighbor’s door bell who gave me a small parcel. My search for a sender was in vain. I carried the parcel and put it down on the living room table for the time being. I went into the kitchen with my shopping because I was now feeling rather peckish. I was starting to experience slight nausea and I was also a little dizzy.

I o
pened the microwave and put a ready-made lasagna inside. While I waited, I made a black tea and looked out through the kitchen window into the misty grey of London.

I swallowed the pain and the tears that had gathered in my eyes. I would not allow
my desire for Adam to overwhelm me. What if he was a murderer?, I said to myself. That was the only thought that stopped me from being overcome with self-pity. I chewed on the nail of my little finger and breathed a sigh of relief when the microwave made its well-known bing sound. I opened the door and was met with the smell of marjoram and spices and my stomach immediately responded with an expectant growl.

I went back into the living room, dropped down on my sofa an
d reached out for the television remote control. Irritated, I closed my eyes and groaned. I then put the remote control to one side. I would rather not hear any news. I had a few spoonfulls of lasagna and discovered that, although I was starving, it didn’t taste very nice. And this wasn’t down to the lasagna, but was because of me and the numbness that had taken hold of me.

As hard as I had tried to push Adam away, it wasn’t working. Not being with
him, was eating me up inside. I took a deep breath to smell him, but his scent wasn’t there. Nothing could give me that warm feeling or quell the need I had for his masculine scent. I had to admit, I was missing him and I was hooked on him. And I had known that would happen.

I put my plate down on the table in frustration and picked up the package. I took out a pair of scissors from the
pen holder in front of me and scored the adhesive tape around the parcel. I opened the box out of curiosity and went stiff. My heart did a somersault and then raced wildly in my chest. I could feel my pulse pounding throughout my body.