Home Is Where the Heart Break Is (10 page)

Nico didn’t say another word but his face spoke volumes. His jaw twitched and his knuckles were white as he gripped the steering wheel. He pulled up to the shop. I hopped out hoping he wouldn’t follow but he did.

He grabbed my hand but I didn’t turn to face him. I just stared down at the ground in front of my feet. “I’ll call you later, Nico,” I said in a near whisper.

He let go of my hand and I glanced back as I got inside. Nico kicked a dent in the truck’s fender then climbed in and sped away.

Chapter 17

I was crying so hard by the time I got to my mom, she was sure someone had attacked me again. I wrapped my arms around her and sobbed into her blouse for a good five minutes before I could catch my breath enough to talk. She walked me to the back room and we sat down on the couch. Her fingers were shaking as she took hold of my hand, and I felt close to throwing up.

Aunt Sadie hobbled over with a wet cloth to put on my forehead. I closed my eyes for a second to relax under the cool comfort of the cloth. When I opened my eyes, Mom and Sadie both looked so fraught with concern I felt guilty for making such a scene. “I’m sorry I was so hysterical, but--” My words choked off.

Mom released my hand and placed her palm against my cheek. “What is it, Jessa? What has happened?”

I decided to just blurt out the story hoping that it would not sound as dreadful once I’d retold it aloud. “There was a box of nails under the seat of Nico’s truck.”

Mom had decided not to mention yesterday’s mail gift to Aunt Sadie, and the poor woman looked completely confused by what I’d just said. But Mom caught the meaning immediately. She quickly debriefed Sadie too.

Mom looked thoughtfully at me. “Jessa, you can’t possibly think that Nico had anything to do with it. You told me he’d pulled you from the water.”

“I know, I know. None of it makes sense.” I removed the cloth from my head and pressed my face into my palms. “I don’t know why I reacted the way I did. It was just so coincidental.”

“I told you to stay away from that boy,” Aunt Sadie interjected. Now I wanted her to leave us alone. I got my wish when the bell on the front door rang. We waited for her to shuffle with her walker out to the front room before continuing.

As soon as she was out of earshot, Mom turned back to me. She brushed the hair off of my face with her hand. “What did Nico say about the nails?”

“He swore they weren’t his.” More tears ran down my cheeks. “And I’m so awful, I didn’t tell him I believed him. What must he think of me?”

“You’ve had a few truly scary mishaps and you were upset, that’s all. I can’t imagine why the nails were there, but I know that kid, and he is so crazy about you, he would never do anything to hurt you. He looks at you like you are the only person in the world who matters to him.”

I cried harder. “I know and I hurt him so badly just now I’ll never be able to make it up to him.” I hugged her. “He’ll never talk to me again and I wouldn’t talk to me either.”

“Go into the bathroom, wash your face, and call him. He’ll understand.”

“You knew as soon as I told you that he could never have done it. Why am I such an idiot?”

“I’m not saying that you weren’t right to jump to such an obvious conclusion, Jessa. The entire thing is a little disquieting, but I’m standing on the outside looking in. His devotion to you is deep. I think that’s why I’ve always been so fond of him. That boy has loved you unconditionally since you were both young kids, and when I see him with you now, I know he has never wavered from that affection.

My hands were trembling so badly I could barely hang onto the phone. My heart sank when the call went straight to Nico’s voice mail. But I wasn’t ready to leave a message, so I hung up like a coward.

I curled up on Sadie’s couch and put the cloth back on my aching head. I kept going over the scene inside the truck in my head and felt worse with each run through. I’d have to make it up to Nico and fast or I would lose him forever. Of course I deserved to lose him. I decided to call the only other person who I could talk to when things were bad. And they were really bad.

Chase answered. “Hey, Jessa, what’s up?”

As soon as I heard his voice, I broke into tears again. “Chase,” I said weakly.

“What’s the matter, Jessa?”

“Oh my god, Chase, I did something really awful, and now Nico will never speak to me again.”

“Slow down and tell me what happened.”

“I found a box of nails in Nico’s truck. They looked just like the nail from the mailbox.”

He paused. “What the hell? Did he explain why they were in the truck?”

“He told me he didn’t know where they came from.”

“That’s weird. Still, it would be impossible to think that Nico would ever hurt you. He’s nuts about you.”

I sniffled loudly and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. “I didn’t know what to say to him. I was confused and a little panicked and I jumped to stupid conclusions. Now he’ll never speak to me again.”

“I’m sure if you talk to him, Jessa, he’ll understand. Call him.”

“I did. His phone is not on.”

“I’m just hanging out at home. Do you want me to drive you to the marina?”

“Would you?”

“Sure. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“You’re the best, Chase.”

I was already feeling better by the time Chase pulled up out front. I was definitely nervous about seeing Nico. I wasn’t totally sure what I would say to him, but I knew that if I didn’t talk to him, I’d make myself sick with heartbreak. I’d spent years being there for the guy when he was hurt or angry, and now I’d been the one to cause him pain.

Chase leaned over and kissed my cheek when I sat in the car. “Stop with the tears. It will be fine. You’ll see.” He pulled out onto the road leading to the marina. “I was thinking about the whole thing on the drive over here. Whoever it is that is threatening you also wants to push Nico out of your life. It must be Regina.”

“I’d started thinking the same thing. Maybe she placed the nails in his truck to frame him. Then I would blame him.” A short sob escaped me but I pulled myself together. “I guess her plan worked. God, Chase, if you’d seen his face,” my throat cracked. “He looked so hurt.”

“You are probably the only person in the world who can have that kind of effect on Nico. He could care less what most people think of him but you’ve always mattered the most to him.”

“I suck. I don’t know how I’ll ever live with myself if I can’t turn things around.”

He pulled into the marina parking lot and touched me lightly on the arm. “Go get him, Jessa. He loves you. He’ll come around.”

“How do I look?” I asked.

Chase’s mouth opened but he hesitated. “You don’t really want to know, do you?” He smiled. “You’re still beautiful, even under the puffiness.”

“Great.” I took a deep breath and stepped out of the car onto slightly wobbly legs. My head hurt and some of the dizziness from the night before had returned. I glanced down the length of the dock but didn’t see Nico anywhere. He could easily have been out on a boat. I walked over to the rental office.

Vanessa was reading a book. She did not hide her shock when she looked up and saw me. She stood and put the book down. “Jessa? What’s wrong. Did something happen to Nico?”

“Nico? No I came to see him.”

Confusion crossed her face. “I thought he was with you.”

“He was, but he dropped me off about an hour ago.” I looked around at the boats. “Do you mean he’s not back yet?”

“I haven’t seen him, and his dad is spitting nails about it.” She handed me a tissue, but I had no more tears to shed. “Did something happen between you two?”

I shook my head. “Can you tell him to call me when he gets back?” I glanced into her cubby. “Do you have a piece of paper? I’ll give you my number just in case you hear something.”

“Sure thing.” She handed me a scrap of paper and a pen. “And don’t worry, Jessa. I’m sure he’ll be here any minute.”

I trudged dejectedly back to Chase’s car and got in. “He never came back after lunch. You don’t think he’s out doing something stupid?” I asked.

“I’m sure he was just too upset to go back to work right away. I’ll try and call him later and see what he’s up to.”

I slouched back against the seat and sighed. “What have I done?”

Chapter 18

The rest of the afternoon went on excruciatingly long. The shop was crowded. Mom and Sadie were busy helping customers, so I hung out the backroom alone, my spirits sinking lower with each passing moment. Nico had not called and there was no word from Vanessa. Chase called at one point to let me know that he couldn’t reach him either. He’d even driven by Nico’s house, but the truck was not there. I would be completely to blame if something had happened to him, and that thought horrified me.

Mom drove me past the marina on the way home. I craned my neck out the window to look for his truck or motorcycle, but they were not there.

“Jessa, he probably has friends who live down the hill. Maybe he decided to head down the mountain to hang out.”

Her words were meant to reassure me that everything was fine, but now all I could think of was that I sent him running back to Regina’s arms. She lived downhill, and she was definitely ready to take him back. Depressing as it was, it was a better scenario than thinking something dreadful had happened to him. He had been filled with rage when he left me.

Mom cancelled her evening with Sadie because she didn’t want to leave me alone in my emotional state and because we still had no idea who might be out to hurt me. She made macaroni and cheese but I just swirled the cheesy noodles around my plate.

“This looks tasty, Mom, but I just can’t eat anything right now. I’ll put it in the refrigerator and heat it up later.”

“You’ve had a couple of stressful days. If you don’t eat, you’ll make yourself sick.

“I’ll eat later. I promise.” My phone rang and I grabbed it off the table where I’d laid it next to my plate. It was Vanessa.

“Hi, did you hear from him?” I asked abruptly.

“No,” she sounded truly concerned. “I guess you haven’t heard from him either. His father’s not angry anymore. He’s worried. I hope he’s not in any kind of trouble.”

My stomach might have been empty but it felt like someone had dropped a lead stone in it. “Thanks for calling, Vanessa.”

“I’m sure he’s fine. Sometimes he goes down the hill to hang out with that girl, Regina. Although, I don’t think he cares much for her.” I was trying to decide if she added that last comment just to make me feel better or if she truly felt that way.

“Thanks again, Vanessa.”

Mom looked at me expectantly.

I shook my head. “He never showed up at the marina and now even wretched Mr. Harris is worried.”

Mom picked up the plates and put them in the sink. “I’m going to run down to the mailbox, Jessa. I’ll be right back.”

The prospect of her walking to the mailbox made me cringe. “Look inside before you reach in. In case it is booby trapped.”

Mom smiled weakly. “I’ll be right back.”

I stared at my silent phone and fought the urge to throw it against the wall. I’d seen no reason to call Nico over and over again like a stalker, but I decided to call once more. This time I was ready to leave a message.

It went straight to voice mail. I took a deep breath and steeled myself against my threatening tears.

“Hey, it’s me.” I paused and swallowed back the pain in my throat. “I can’t explain why I was such an idiot this afternoon, but I can tell you this, Nicholas Harris-- I’m still the girl who’d gladly give up a Halloween parade for you, I’m still the girl who’d ditch school to be with you when things are shitty,” I chuckled into the phone, “I’m still the girl who’d break her burrito in half to share with you.” Now the tears came but I soldiered on. “I want to be with you. There’s no one else in this world for me. It’s you, Nico. I realized it as soon I’d moved back here. It has always been you.”

Mom stepped back into the cabin just as I hung up. She seemed to sense that I’d been on the phone. “Did you hear anything?” she asked.

I shook my head and curled up on the couch. My head was still throbbing and my leg hurt. My only hope was that I would fall fast asleep and then wake up to find it had all been a bad dream.

I drifted off into a depressed, deep sleep just as my phone rang. Still completely out of it, I frantically grabbed for the phone and managed to get it to my ear without dropping it. The cabin was bathed in the shadows of dusk, and Mom must have gone to her room to read.

“Hello,” I answered shakily.

Vanessa’s voice answered back. “Jessa?”

“Yeah, it’s me. Did you hear from Nico?”

“I did,” she hesitated. “He’s been here all this time.”

I sighed. “So he’s all right? Can you put him on the phone?”

“That’s the problem. He’s out on one of the boats. His phone reception was so bad out there, I could barely hear him. Mr. Harris went home to wait for him. I tried to reach him but he didn’t answer his phone. Nico’s boat ran out of gasoline, and he needs someone to ride out and tow him in. Jessa, I was wondering if you would come out here and go with me. I’m not very good at driving boats, and it will be completely dark soon.”

I reached down for my shoes. “If Nico calls back tell him we’ll be right there.”

“See you soon, Jessa.”

My leg was sore when I stood up, and I limped to Mom’s bedroom and poked my head inside. “I’m going down to the marina.”

Mom smiled up from her book. “He’s back?”

“Yes.” I decided not to give her any details because she would be upset if I’d told her about driving a boat. But I knew how to drive one well enough to motor out slowly and find Nico. The lake wasn’t that big, and it was basically in the shape of an oval with only a few hidden coves and inlets.

Vanessa was waiting on the docks as I arrived. She looked a bit nervous about the whole thing.

“Did you ever hear from Mr. Harris?” I asked.

She shook her head. “Not yet but I left him a message so he’s probably already headed back here. I hope he doesn’t get mad that I’m taking a boat out.”

“You can blame it on me,” I said. “And like you said, it will be completely dark soon. Nico needs our help.” The light of dusk had already weakened more, and the sun was slowly disappearing behind the western peaks.

“The Barnacle is the easiest boat to drive.” Vanessa pointed to the small ski boat bobbing next to the dock. “I have the key. Why don’t you get in and start it up while I untie it.”

I didn’t waste any time climbing inside the boat. The engine started up easily, and Vanessa climbed in and pushed against the dock so that the bow would turn out toward the lake.

I putted out past the orange markers. “Did he mention which side he was on?” I asked.

“He’s on the north end near the inlet where the fishing boats usually go.”

I nodded and pushed the throttle. The boat moved a little faster. I figured if I just drove straight ahead there shouldn’t be any problem. “I wonder why he didn’t have one of the fishing boats tow him to the marina.”

Vanessa sat up front and watched ahead. “I don’t know. I’m just surprised he’s been out here on the lake all this time.” She looked back at me. “He must have been really upset about something.” It was obvious she was fishing for information, but I was not in the mood to give it. There was only the faintest daylight clinging to the lake. Dark ripples of water slammed against the boat as we plowed across the nearly deserted surface.

I glanced around and noticed even the beaches surrounding us were fading with the light. “It’s getting dark. I hope we can see him out here. Maybe you should try and call him again.”

“Ooh, I nearly forgot. One of the reasons I chose this boat is because it has a light,” Vanessa said. She looked back at me. “It’s heavy so I’ll need your help with it. Put the boat in neutral and come up here.”

I did as she asked and climbed up to the bow. We opened the front seat, and Vanessa pulled out a light. She leaned deep inside the compartment and pulled out a portable battery pack. “It hooks to that silver hook on the nose of the bow.” We both sprawled out on our stomachs and slid along the smooth fiberglass to the front edge of the boat.

“It’s too heavy for me,” she said and handed me the light that couldn’t have weighed more than five pounds.

I scooted out farther. It took a couple of passes until I managed to snag it on the hook. “There, it’s on.” I turned back just as both of Vanessa’s feet came at me. She kicked me hard in the stomach, and I flew off the boat and into the water. It took me a second to regain the breath I’d lost from the impact of her feet.

“Vanessa!” I screamed. “What are you doing?” I asked through gulps of water. It immediately dawned on me while I struggled to tread water in the choppy tide that it had been her all along.

She peered over the side with a wicked snarl. “You messed up everything by coming back here. This was going to be the summer that I landed Nicholas Harris, and then you came back and all my plans were destroyed.”

“But what about the guy you’re dating?” I asked. I reached up but there was no way I could pull myself back on board. “I made him up to make Nico jealous.”

“Vanessa, don’t be ridiculous. Pull me back up and we’ll talk about this.”

“What’s there to talk about? Since elementary school I’ve been trying to get that boy to notice me, but he could never see past the brilliant shining light that was his Jessa.”

“But I’ve been gone for years,” I said. “You can’t blame me for him not noticing you, Vanessa. I wasn’t even in Pinecliff.” Cold was taking its toll on my extremities like it had the night before in the river.

“It took me until now to perfect my plan. I got this job at the marina so I could be close to him. Then, all of a sudden, you were back in town. Your timing could not have been worse.”

“I take it Nico is not out here?”

“I don’t know where he is, but I have a feeling you found the nails. I must say that worked out even better than I’d expected.”

I was in the middle of a dark lake where I could very likely drown and all I could think of was that I might die having Nico mad at me.

“Vanessa, pull me back up, and we can talk about this.” Through my panic I was trying to assess just how crazy she was and if she would actually be evil enough to leave me out in the water alone.

With a sickening laugh, she supplied me with my answer. She hopped over to the captain’s chair. She pushed in the throttle. I quickly swam the opposite direction of the bow, hoping that I wouldn’t get sucked into the motor as she sped off. The whole time I kept thinking how easily she could have killed me with the boat if she’d really wanted to finish me off. Then as I watched the boat get farther away, I decided she probably wanted me to suffer from a slow, agonizing death instead.

I moved my arms and legs wildly hoping to keep them from freezing and in an attempt to keep my head above water. The sun had set on the other side of the mountains and the water looked black and deep. The closest land was more than half a mile away, but I had no other choice. I started swimming toward it. I was a fair swimmer, but the cold water and the shock of the whole bizarre situation slowed my progress.

Then in the distance, I heard the motor of a boat. I lifted my chin as high as I could to avoid the small waves from slapping my face and to get a view of the boat. The Barnacle was still moving away from me and since I’d been kind enough to hang the light for her, Vanessa could easily find her way back to the marina. But it was not The Barnacle that I had heard. There was another boat on the water, and it seemed to be heading straight for me.

I looked around frantically. It was a good-sized lake, but for some horrifying reason this boat was pointed directly at me. I started yelling and waving my arms wildly. Then someone held up a big spotlight and pointed it at the water. It swept over me at first then it stopped and swung back.

“I see her,” a voice said.

“You there, in the water,” a deep voice said through a megaphone, “this is the lake patrol. Stay where you are. We’re coming to get you.” The man had barely finished his instructions when I saw a figure dive off the boat and swim toward me.

Sobs of joy escaped me as the swimmer drew nearer.

“Thank god, you’re all right, Jessa.” Nico’s arms went around me. “Can you swim?”

“Yeah. Especially now that you’re here with me.”

We got to the boat and a small ladder was lowered over the side. My hands were numb and my arms felt heavy. Nico’s hands went around my waist, and he lifted me up onto the ladder. One of the men inside the boat leaned down and helped pull me up and over the side. They threw a heavy blanket around my shoulders and they did the same for Nico. We sat close to each other on the seat as the patrol boat swung around and headed back to the marina.

The man steering the boat was on the radio, and I could hear bits of information. They seemed to be talking about Vanessa because I heard them mention The Barnacle.

I peered up at Nico. Water was dripping from his hair. There was still a glint of something in his eyes that I couldn’t quite put my finger on, and I knew things were still not right between us.

My limbs began to warm, and my mind had cleared enough to understand how miraculous it was that they had found me out there. “How did you know I was out there?”

Nico’s dark lashes dropped for a moment then he lifted his gaze to mine and a lump formed instantly in my throat. I wanted to throw my arms around him and kiss him but there was still a wall between us, a wall that I’d built.

“I got your message and I dropped by your house to talk to you. Your mom told me you were coming down here to meet me. I was confused at first but then something struck me, something that should have struck me today when we were in the truck,” his voice faded as he seemed to relive the painful afternoon. “I was driving over here and I remembered that I’d given Vanessa the keys to my truck. She’d needed to pick up something in town for my dad. Everything started making sense, and I realized it had been her all along.”

“She told me we were heading out to rescue you.” I rubbed the cold from my face with my hand. “I’m such a fool. I believe a nutcase like Vanessa, and like a giant dodo, I follow her onto a boat not having any clue about the fact that she’s a psycho. Then when my best friend, who I know better than I know myself, tells me something, I question it. I don’t know what came over me, Nico. Can you forgive me?”