Home Is Where the Heart Break Is (4 page)

“My jewels are about to shrivel up and die from the cold,” Chase said seemingly oblivious to the intimate moment Nico and I had just shared.

Nico drew his gaze from mine and turned to face Chase. “I doubt you’ll miss them.”

Chase pushed his hands underwater and shoved a massive wall of water at Nico. Nico came back with his own tsunami, and I hopped away trying to avoid the onslaught of cold water. The flow was mild in this part of the river. I kept taking small steps against the current to stay in one place. I was busy concentrating on the rocks in order to avoid a major ankle twist when the splash party came my direction. I covered my face but the force of two big guys throwing water at me was too much. I ducked under until they stopped. For payback, I decided to stay submerged for as long as possible to give them a little scare. I floated underwater for an impressively long time when a giant hand grabbed my shoulder and yanked me through the surface. I took a deep breath and laughed until I caught a glimpse of Nico’s face. He looked completely freaked out.

“Damnit, Jessa,” He plowed through the water back to shore.

“I’m sorry,” I yelled from the water.

“That was a good one,” Chase said. He put his hand over his chest. “My heart is still in overdrive.”

Nico dragged himself from the water and sat on the shore.

“I didn’t think he’d get this pissed,” I said.

“I’ve got to say, you scared him good.” Chase moved closer and lowered his voice. “You know, Jessa, we were both really bummed when you left town. I’d go home after school every day and lock myself in my room.” He glanced up toward the shore and then looked back at me. “But that guy went into full shut down mode. He was in the principal’s office every day, and he kept getting into fights.”

I couldn’t believe how hard it was for me to hear what Chase was telling me. I’d always felt guilty about leaving them, and especially Nico because he’d always seemed to need me.

My chin vibrated and I took hold of Chase’s hand. “It’s cold. Let’s get out.”

We waded to shore. Nico did not take his eyes off of me as I emerged from the water. I hugged myself against the cold air and his heated gaze. Things had changed. We were definitely not ten years old anymore. Chase rushed on ahead, and I put my hand out for Nico to take. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you like that.”

“Don’t let it happen again, Duchess.” He grabbed my hand and pulled himself to standing. I turned to head up to the shack and our dry clothes, but he pulled me to a stop. I faced him. Without hiding the fact that he was checking me out, his deep gaze drifted over my body and then back up to my face. “Damn, Jessa, you are definitely not a little girl anymore.”

“Shut up. Let’s go back up and get dressed before I turn blue.”

I yanked back on my shorts and t-shirt at lightning speed, and it was not just because I was cold. These two guys had always been like brothers to me but time apart and growing up had changed that. The connections were still there, that was certain. I’d worried that we would be like strangers, but there was too much history between the three of us for that to be possible. But things had definitely changed.

Chase took the phone out of his pocket and read a text. His fingers flew over the keypad and he sent one back.

“Uh oh, she’s on to you,” Nico said.

“Go to hell, Nico. You don’t know anything about my life.”

Nico put up his hands. “You’re right. None of my business if she pulls you around by a nose ring. Some guys like that.”

Chase clamped shut his fists. There had been several moments during the morning where their long time friendship was evident, but it was also clear that they’d grown in opposite directions. Looking at them now, they were both so completely different; it was almost impossible to believe they’d ever been friends.

“Nico, you need to lay off. Not everyone enjoys being a loner.” Instantly I regretted my words. With cold silence, Nico grabbed up his shoes, sat on the bench, and put them back on. Tension filled the tiny space, but I refused to have the morning end like this.

“You know, guys, maybe we’re just trying too hard to recreate what we had,” I said.

Chase put the phone back in his pocket. “What are you saying, Jessa? You don’t want to hang out anymore?” There was a true look of worry on his face which was so cute, and so Chase.

“Not at all.” I motioned my hands around our old haunt. “Maybe we just have to stop chasing the past and make new memories.” I looked down at Nico, and I knew him well enough to know that he was only pretending not to listen.

Nico pushed off the bench. “I’ve got to go to work.” He slammed out the door, and it swung precariously on its single hinge.

Chase and I followed.

Chapter 7

I’d always had mixed feelings about Aunt’s Sadie’s antique shop. Sometimes her collection was pretty, and sometimes it was pretty scary. One corner of the shop would be filled with cool, old clocks covered in chubby gold angels, or cherubs as Sadie called them, and just around the bend might be a collection of old dolls with creepy faces and wiry hair. But one thing always remained the same, the smell. Aunt Sadie kept a very clean shop, but it seemed that no matter how much you dusted old things, they still always smelled old. It was as if the layers of time were there to stay.

“Jessa!” Aunt Sadie’s face broke into a huge grin as we walked into her shop. I’d loved hanging around Aunt Sadie when I was younger. She was sort of a know-it-all but she told great stories about her days hunting antiques around the world, and she had this great explosive laugh that would both startle you and make you smile at the same time.

Aunt Sadie was using a walker to get around, and she scooted out from behind her counter to greet us. It was shocking to see because normally she’d been the type to bustle around as if she had wings on her shoes. She’d gained a lot of weight since I’d seen her last. It had been four years since she’d traveled to see us at Christmas and then the trips had become too taxing. I was always angry at Mom for not going to see her. My mom lost her mom to cancer when she was nineteen, and Aunt Sadie had become like a mother to her.

Sadie was a hugger but it was obvious her back was troubling her. I put my arms lightly around her and kissed her cheek. I stepped back.

“Look at how beautiful you are, Jessa.” She grinned at Mom. “You are still beautiful too, Charlene.”

“Thank you.” Mom kissed her cheek. “How are you feeling?”

“Terrible, just terrible and with the summer season starting,” she took hold of Mom’s hand, “I’m just glad you’re here.”

“We’re glad to be here, Sadie,” Mom glanced around the store. “You have a lot more stuff or maybe it’s just been so long, I’ve forgotten.”

“It has been too long.” Sadie’s cheeks had always been round, but now they were plump enough to nearly hide her twinkly green eyes. In fact with her pale, nearly white hair, she reminded me a bit of Mrs. Claus. “So, Jessa, have you seen the boys?”

“The boys?” I asked feigning ignorance.

“You know who I’m talking about. I know the dark haired one with the nice smile--” She looked at me. “What was his name?”

“Chase.”

“Right, Chase, is such a nice boy.” Then she drew in her bottom lip and her sparkly eyes looked worried. “I hate to be the person to break the news to you, but I think he’s been very serious with the Pruitt girl.” Sadie turned to Mom. “That man turned out to be a stock market genius,” she lowered her voice as if some of her old stuff had ears, “although I think he was involved with some insider trading shenanigans because he got rich almost overnight.” Like she was watching slow motion tennis match she turned back to me. “Anyhow, Sweetie, I hope you’re not too heartbroken. Anyhow you are much prettier.”

I took her hand. “It’s all right, Aunt Sadie. I already knew and I’m happy that Chase has someone.”

The expression she gave me was the classic,
yes, of course you are
, look.

I was about to insist that I really didn’t mind but decided to let her have her fun. She seemed to revel in the drama of it all.

A frown pulled down her mouth. “Now, Nicholas is another story altogether. He’d gotten so out of control that his father sent him to live with his mother. He’s back now . . .” She shook her head. “You should definitely stay away from that one.”

“Nico and I are still friends, Aunt Sadie. I have no plans to stay away from him. And his father--”

Mom touched my arm and shook her head. She was right. It was better to just smile and pretend to take Aunt Sadie’s advice. Fortunately, she was done with my session of helpful hints. She moved on to my mom who was completely blindsided.

“Charlene, what on earth happened with your last fiancé? He seemed so perfect. We need to find you someone who will stick around.”

I left my poor mom standing wide-eyed and open mouthed as I walked to the backroom to answer my cell phone.

“Hey.”

I recognized his voice instantly. “Hey.”

We’d driven home from the river with hardly a word between us as if we were both trying to absorb how this whole thing was going to play out.

“I’ve got a lunch break at one. Why don’t you come to the marina and meet me then.”

“All right.”

“Jessa!” Sadie called from the front of the shop.

“I’ll see you then, Nico. Bye.”

After a morning of organizing porcelain cups and old prints, I decided to walk to the marina. It was only a mile from Aunt Sadie’s shop. Sundays were always slow in the village because most of the shops were closed. The sidewalks were nearly empty. As I strolled past the little grocery store, the door opened and Chase walked out with Susie.

A long, awkward moment of silence followed as we all looked at each other. I decided right then that there was no damn reason for Susie to hate me or for me to hate Susie. If Chase liked her then I was determined to do the same.

I smiled. “Hey guys, out for a Sunday stroll?” I glanced around. “I’d forgotten how quiet it was in the village on Sundays.”

Susie’s mouth twisted a bit, and she looked rather perplexed that I was speaking so easily to them.

“Where are you off to?” Chase asked.

“My mom’s working in Aunt Sadie’s shop. I’m headed to the marina to meet Nico for lunch.”

“Sounds fun.” Chase couldn’t hide the disappointment in his voice.

Susie made a show of cringing when I mentioned Nico’s name. It made me suddenly curious just how close she’d been with Nico. And Nico seemed to hate the idea that Chase was with her. Maybe they
had
fought over her, and that thought annoyed me greatly.

Another period of awkward silence followed, so I went to the customary ice breaking topic.

“Great weather, huh? Almost nice enough for a swim in the river. Although I’m sure the water is still freezing.”

I was grinning at Susie when I said it, but out of the corner of my eye I could see Chase fidgeting. But he knew me well enough to know that I would never rat him out. That bond of always protecting and keeping each other’s secrets could never be broken.

Chase and I’d had a couple of doozies too. Once, when we were playing tetherball in the fifth grade, he confessed to me that he’d been pouring his mom’s coffee cream into his sister’s nutrition drinks. They’d been prescribed especially by one of her nutrition counselors, but Chase thought the cream would help her gain weight faster. I thought the plan was brilliant, but there was one major flaw-- his sister had been secretly dumping her drinks down the sink. Chase, and only Chase, knew of my plan to sabotage one of my mom’s relationships because I’d hated the guy. I’d acted like a monster for weeks but my mom was on to me. She eventually dumped the guy anyway.

Susie finally untwisted her mouth long enough to talk. “Chase and I always spend every Sunday together, starting with a morning at church then we pick up muffins to take down to the river.”

“Sounds cool,” I said. “Well, I need to get to the marina. Have fun with your muffins.” I turned to leave.

“Wait a minute,” Chase said, and his tone worried me.

I twisted back and Susie was scowling up at him.

“I never go to church with you, and you’re wasting your time lying to Jessa because she knows everything about me.”

Susie opened her mouth to speak, but Chase pressed a finger to her lips. “Do you know where I was this morning?”

“Uh, Chase, ixnay on the--”

“No, Jessa, let me tell her. I went to the river with Jessa and Nico. You are going to need to accept the fact that they were a major part of my life, and I plan on seeing both of them a lot this summer.”

Susie’s face reddened, and I waited for her to explode but she didn’t.

It was definitely time for me to make my exit. “Yeah, maybe we can all hang out together,” I suggested weakly.

The look in Susie’s eyes did not convey that that would take place anytime soon, but at least it didn’t look like she was going to be too pissed at Chase. I would have hugged my friend for putting his foot down, but I was sure that would be pushing things a bit.

Chapter 8

A few families were suiting up in puffy life jackets while they waited for their rental boat to pull up to the dock. Anchored boats bobbed up and down as the wakes of other boats came rolling into the marina. I walked along the decking but didn’t see Nico. Someone was working inside the rental booth, so I walked over to ask where I might find him.

The round hazel eyes that stared back at me were totally familiar, but I could not think of a name to go with them.

The eyes opened wider. “Jessa! So it’s true. Nico mentioned you were back in town.” The girl grinned. “Mentioned is an understatement. He hasn’t stopped talking about you all morning.”

“Vanessa? How are you?”

Vanessa and I had never really been friends, but growing up she had been unabashedly crazy for Nico. Every Valentine’s Day she’d create a huge, glittery, three-dimensional Valentine for him, and he always accepted it graciously, even though I knew it embarrassed him. And he would always made a point to put extra candy hearts in her envelope to reciprocate without giving her false hope.

Vanessa stuck her hand in front of my face. There was a small diamond ring on her finger. “Do you remember Pete Vickers?”

“Hmm, the name is totally familiar. I’m sure if I saw a photo--”

She stuck her cell phone in front of my face. A blurry picture of a guy in a soccer uniform wavered on the screen.

I nodded even though I still had no clue who he was. “Oh yeah, Peter Vickers.” I took a closer look at the ring. “Are you two engaged?”

She put her hand on her chest in shock as if engagement had never even crossed her mind. “No, it’s a promise ring. He gave it to me the day before school let out.” She put her phone away. “So you’re here for the summer?”

“Yep. My mom and I are helping out at my aunt’s antique shop.”

“Oh, that’s right. I forgot Sadie was your aunt.”

“She’s actually my mom’s aunt.”

“Are you here to see Nico?” she asked before I’d barely gotten my last syllable out.

“Yes. Have you seen him?”

She leaned forward out of her little booth and pointed toward a boat. “He’s bringing in a broken down boat.”

I squinted out to the water. Nico was standing behind the steering wheel of a rental boat. Smoke was billowing out of the engine. It would have been moving faster with a sea turtle pulling it. I waited on the side of the dock and helped him tie the boat off.

He climbed out. “Piece of shit. I keep telling my dad that this one’s ready for a burial at sea, but you know how cheap my old man is.” He looked at me. “I’m glad you came, Duchess.” He motioned toward the sandwich shop with his head. “Come on, I’ll buy you lunch. Then we can take out one of the functioning boats.”

“Sounds good to me.”

As we passed by the rental booth, Nico stopped for a second. “Hey, Vanessa, I’m taking my lunch.”

“Okie, dokie,” she answered back.

“So of all people to be working with you,” I said once we were far enough away.

“Yeah, well, she’s a good worker. And fortunately, she’s madly in love with someone else now.”

“She was always super sweet . . . not to mention she was an extraordinarily talented Valentine maker.”

“I forgot about those cards. They were pretty cool. I haven’t gotten anything that custom on Valentine’s Day since.”

I grabbed his arm and pressed myself against him. “How sad. I’ll have to remember to send you something special next February.”

“It won’t be special unless you’re wrapped inside of it. And don’t talk about winter already. I don’t want summer to end.”

I peered up at him. “Why? Does your job at the marina end in summer?”

He looked down at me with a raised eyebrow. “Yeah, I don’t want summer to end because of my wonderful marina job.”

Sometimes I was a clueless ninny. “You’re right. I won’t bring it up again. Let’s just make the best of it while I’m here. No more mornings like this morning.”

“You mean mornings that include Chase?”

I dropped his arm. “That is not what I meant at all.”

“All right, all right. Sorry. Just as long as he doesn’t drag whats-her-name along.”

I stopped suddenly. He went a few paces ahead until he realized I was no longer next to him. He looked back. “Hurry, the sandwich shop gets busy at this time.”

“Exactly why do you hate Susie so much?”

“She’s a bitch.”

“That’s not good enough. Lexi told me you dated her. Just how close were you two?”

He smiled and walked closer. His finger traced my bottom lip. “That pouty face is so freakin’ cute. If you think that one date at a burger stand and one quick make-out session in my dad’s pool house is dating then that term is being thrown about pretty loosely.” He glanced around then looked back at me. “Look, I guess I just hate the way she treats Chase. It’s like she owns him, and I think the dude deserves better.”

I pointed up at him. “I knew it. You still care about Chase. Your coldness is all just an act.”

He walked away from me. “Come on, I’m starved.”

I ran to catch up to him but I couldn’t stop smiling.

He glanced sideways at me and laughed. “You look like that freaky looking cat in Alice in Wonderland.”

“It is called a Cheshire cat and I’m just happy.” Then I stopped again.

Again it took him a second to notice that I was not keeping pace. He twisted back. “I swear, Duchess, I’m going to pick your skinny butt up and carry you to the sandwich shop.”

“You made out with Susie in your dad’s pool house? On the couch we were just sitting on?”

“Technically.”

“How can you make out technically?”

He seemed to contemplate that question a moment. “Don’t know but it might be fun. I meant technically it was on the couch only we’d pulled out the mattress.”

I put up my hand. “So very sorry I asked. Will not bring it up again, I promise. I only hope I can still eat lunch.”

“Not all that much happened anyhow,” he said.

“Truly, let’s just drop it before I lose the donuts I had this morning.”

We bought sandwiches and drinks, and Nico led me to a boat. I helped him push off, and we putted out past the buoys.

I sat up at the front of the boat. Ripples of water rolled under us and the boat rose and fell rhythmically with the current. Picturesque Fortune Lake was surrounded by tall pines and quaint cottages. Nico waved at the driver of a wakeboard boat as we sped past it.

My hair flew all around me as Nico pushed the throttle. I laughed at the exhilaration of the wind and speed. “It’s been so long since I’ve been in a boat, I’d forgotten how fun it was,” I said loud enough for him to hear over the din of the motor.

“This lake and the boats are the best thing about Pinecliff,” he said. “I’d go mad with boredom if I couldn’t go wakeboarding. A bunch of us are going tomorrow morning. The water is like glass if you get out here early enough. You should come.”

“I’ll have to see if my mom needs help or not. My Aunt Sadie looked like she was having a hard time getting around.”

“We’ll be back by nine if that helps.” Nico slowed down the boat and coasted into Bear Cove, a small nook in the lake where the dark blue water was shaded by trees.

Nico turned off the engine and sat next to me at the bow. I leaned over the side and looked down at the clear water of the cove. A school of silver fish swam out from beneath the boat.

I sat up. “Remember when we used to sit at the marina and try and catch those little fish with a bucket. I still don’t know what we’d planned to do with them if we’d ever caught any.”

Nico unwrapped his sandwich. “I thought we’d decided to pool our money and buy an aquarium so we could keep them like pets.” He took a bite.

Nico had been one of those kids who was always dying to have a dog, but his father would never let him get one. His father was such a jerk.

“I’m sorry you never got that dog you wanted.” I unwrapped my sandwich.

“Actually, I sort of had one for awhile. My mom had this cool, big mutt named Cisco. He went everywhere with me. Having a dog was just as awesome as I thought it would be. But when Mom died, her best friend had to take Cisco in. There was no way I could bring him back with me, and I had no place to keep him. He’s got a good home, and that’s all that matters. But I do miss him slobbering all over my dashboard and leaving wet nose prints on my windshield.”

He’d already gobbled down both halves of his sandwich so I handed him my other half.

He lifted it up. “Are you sure?”

“Go ahead. It’s a big sandwich. You’ve got a much bigger appetite.” I looked at his arms. “I guess it’s all those hunky muscles you’ve got now. As I recall, you used to pick through your school lunch like your fork was going through a mine field. The only time I ever really saw you chow down was when you came to my house for dinner.”

Nico swallowed and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “I loved your mom’s fried chicken and mashed potatoes. I swear I still dream about them. To be honest, I loved everything she cooked, mostly because it was the only home cooking I ever ate back then.”

Amazingly that had never occurred to me. I, of course, loved Mom’s cooking because she was my mom, and I thought everything she made was delicious. I’d just assumed that was why Nico liked her food so much.

“I’ll have my mom make you some chicken and potatoes one night.”

“Sounds good. Although your mom didn’t look too thrilled to see me this morning.”

“I forgot to warn her about the tattoos. She was expecting sweet, tattooless Nico. But she has always liked you.”

He finished the sandwich half I’d given him. His shoulder and chest muscles flexed beneath his t-shirt as he wadded up the wrapper. Shoulder to shoulder, we leaned back against the seat running along the front of the boat. The motion of the boat and the warm sun was so relaxing, I rested my head against his shoulder and had to fight to stay awake.

He searched for my hand, and he laced his big fingers between mine. “It’s so weird, Jessa. I feel like it has been so long that we should almost be strangers, but sitting here next to you, it’s like you never left. Everything about you is so damn familiar, the scent of your hair, your smile, the sound of your laugh. It is like you are lodged so tightly in my memory, no amount of time can erase it.”

I squeezed his hand tightly. “I know exactly how you feel.”

We laid there in comfortable silence for a few minutes then Nico fished his cell phone out of his pocket and checked the time. “I’ve got to get back.”

I sat up groggily. “Darn it, I was just about to fall asleep.”

Nico walked back to the captain’s seat and started the engine. “What are you doing for the rest of the day?”

“I guess I’ll head back and help my mom at the shop. I told Lexi I’d hang out with her after she gets off work.”

“Oh.” It was always easy to read disappointment on Nico’s face.

“I’m just glad she’s still talking to me.”

He spun the boat around. “Yeah, lucky you.”

I walked over and motioned him out of the captain’s chair. “Give me a driving lesson. And why do you dislike Lexi?”

“I don’t. I was just hoping we could spend time together tonight.” He stood behind the seat, and I sat down and took hold of the wheel.

“Well, I already told her that we would meet, and besides, I can’t spend all of my spare time with you.”

“And why the hell not?”

I tilted my head back to look up at him. “Yes,
Susie
.”

He stepped to the back of the boat and sat down.

We floated slowly out toward the center of the lake, and I panicked as soon as I saw another boat. I glanced back at him. “Hey, Grumpy, there’s another boat coming.”

“Make sure you don’t hit it.”

“Nico, get over here, otherwise I’m just going to turn off the engine.”

His shadow loomed over me. “Scoot forward.”

I moved to the front of the chair, and he threw his long leg over the back of the seat and sat down behind me. When we were younger, it was how he’d taught me to drive a boat, but this was definitely not the same. The heat of his chest pressed against my back, and he lifted my hair up in his hand as he’d always done years ago. It kept my hair from flying into his face. Normally we would be laughing wildly. But this time we both seemed to be breathing faster than normal, but there was no laughter. Without warning he planted a kiss on the back of my neck. It felt right, his mouth on my skin. His arm wrapped around my waist and I relaxed back against his chest. There were no more kisses and no more words, but gliding over the scenic lake with the crisp breeze tickling my skin and my best friend holding me made me feel like I’d truly come home.

As the marina came into view, Nico dropped his hold on me. “Shit.”

I looked toward the docks and saw Nico’s dad, Mr. Harris, standing at the edge with his hands on his hips. He was still a big man, but now there was a lot more middle and a lot less hair. His stern brow and permanent scowl stood out from a more weathered face, but they still had the same chilling effect.

I quickly slid out from under Nico’s arm. “Holy crap, he looks mad.” I ran and sat at the back of the boat.

“Uh, it’s my dad. He always looks mad, remember?”

Mr. Harris glowered down at us from the dock and gave me only a cursory glance before focusing his glare on Nico. “Vanessa said you brought in the Sea Goddess with engine trouble.”

“Yep. Her goddess days are over.” Nico tossed him the rope, and he tied the boat off. I had been so used to seeing Nico shrink in his father’s presence, seeing him answer him casually and even with sarcasm was both surprising and good to see.

Nico climbed out of the boat and then turned to help me. His dad nodded at me, but it was obvious he didn’t recognize me.

“Dad, aren’t you going to say hello to Jessa?”

Mr. Harris looked at me again and shockingly a slight smile took shape. I’d known the man for years and I’d never seen him crack so much as a half-grin. “Jessa, look at you. I’m sorry. I didn’t know it was you. I just figured Nico had another girl out on the boat.”

“So you’ve taken a lot of girls out on this boat, huh?” I asked.

“Yep, you’re the Monday girl.” Nico finished securing the boat.