THE HUSBAND HUNTERS (38 page)

‘Did that really happen?’ Kaz managed to say. Tash came up to the table and looked at Heather walking away hand in hand with the dark-haired man.

‘Bang goes the Unattractive Friend Theory,’ she said. Kaz and I nodded. I don’t think I’d ever felt so unattractive in my whole life. A twenty-stone woman, wrapped in her mother’s bed sheet, was obviously sexier than I was. I wondered whether I would ever get a boyfriend. Probably even the eighty-year-old balding midgets wouldn’t look twice at me, and instead would prefer to be squashed in bizarre sexual games with the likes of Heather.

‘I think it’s time to go home,’ I said wearily. ‘We’ve got a wedding to go to in the morning.’

I slept in until 12 noon the next morning, and then rushed madly round to Soph’s house to change into my bridesmaid’s dress.

I expected to see Soph with eyes so puffy that she looked like she had been in a boxing match, but instead she opened the door for me, with a bright smile on her face.

There’s no justice, I thought, as I followed her upstairs to get ready. I hadn’t drunk a lot last night, but I’d still had to take two aspirin that morning. Soph looked as rosy-cheeked and fresh-faced, as if she’d just come back from a morning jog.

Tash, Rach and Kaz were already there. Rach’s mum was there too, holding baby Max, and Rach kept rushing to give him a cuddle.

‘Keep him away from your dress,’ Soph shouted. I had to agree. The dress wouldn’t look quite as gorgeous with a puddle of baby vomit on it.

The other three were having their hair done, and I slipped into my dress too and went over to the mirror to do my make-up.

‘I can’t believe you are getting married, Soph,’ squealed Rach, ‘the first one of us down the aisle. It’s so exciting.’

Soph’s mum was helping her into her dress. She did up all the little pearl buttons on the back and then she swung Soph round by the shoulders to face us all. We all gave a sharp intake of breath. She looked gorgeous. Her slim brown shoulders rose out of the bustier of the dress, and the folds of cream satin hung from her tiny waist. There was no doubt about it, she made a stunning picture. I could feel tears pricking the back of my throat, she looked so lovely.

‘None of you are allowed to cry,’ Soph said sternly. ‘You will ruin your make-up.’

***

A few hours later, we all stood shivering in the vestry behind Soph, as the organ struck up the Wedding March. I could see her shoulders shaking with nerves, and I gave her hand a quick squeeze. ‘You’ll be fine,’ I reassured her, and she looked back at me, her eyes shining.

‘I know,’ she nodded, and we were off, slowly walking behind Soph as she made her way up the aisle. I could see Paul waiting at the bottom. This is what it could have felt like for me, I thought, looking at him in his dark suit. He was so handsome.

‘Bee – stop! Over here,’ hissed Kaz. I’d been so busy imagining my own wedding day, I’d nearly walked into the back of Soph. Kaz, luckily pulled me in line with her, and we watched as the vicar started to address the congregation.

Nick was snapping away with his camera. Soph had asked him to do the wedding pictures, and he was taking his job very seriously. I was glad I was a bridesmaid today, rather than his assistant. It was so the easy option. Soph and Paul were standing facing each other, gazing deeply into each other’s eyes as they solemnly said their vows.

‘Do you take this woman to be your wedded wife?’ asked the vicar. Paul smiled lovingly at Soph.

‘I do,’ he said. Paul slipped the slim, golden band on to Soph’s fourth finger, and then she took his hand and put a slightly chunkier one on his finger.

Then the vicar asked that fateful question.

‘Does anyone present know of any reason why these two people should not be joined together?’

I had to stifle a giggle. What if I shouted: Yes! The Husband Hunters actually found him for me, and she stole him from under my nose.’

Kaz and Rach both looked anxiously at me, in case I blurted anything out, but I remained silent. Even if I had wanted to, I could have never have shouted that out in front of the entire congregation. How embarrassing that would be – one hundred and twenty people would know that I’d been ditched in favour of my best friend. No thanks.

Then in a whirl of confetti it was all over. Soph and Paul made their way out of the church doors and into the wedding car.

Tash was dabbing her eyes. ‘What a lovely service,’ she kept saying.

It wasn’t like Tash to be overly sentimental. She must be hormonal, I decided.

A few hours later, the speeches had been done and the wedding was in full

swing. Rach was being whirled around the dance floor by Paul’s best man, and Tash was dancing sexily with Rob. I looked around for Kaz. There she was with Adam. They were gazing moonily at each other too. I suddenly felt quite alone.

The club had worked out for everyone but me, I thought, taking a sip of wine and watching it all, as if they were characters in a film. Soph was married and Rach was happy with baby Max. Kaz and Adam looked as though they could give Romeo and Juliet a run for their money, and even Tash, whom we’d all thought was going to be impossible to find a husband for, was engaged to Rob. It was only me who hadn’t found anyone.

‘Penny for your thoughts,’ said a voice, interrupting my self-pity. I smiled forlornly at Nick, who had sat down next to me.

‘I was thinking that I’d set up this club, and how it had worked for everyone but me,’ I told him, gloomily. ‘I’m feeling a bit sorry for myself. The girls keep promising me that Mr Right will come along sooner or later, but the clock is ticking on.’

‘Perhaps you’re searching for him too hard,’ said Nick. ‘If you stopped looking, then you might find him when you least expect it.’

‘I should start gorging myself on cream cakes, put on about ten stone, and then men will be falling over themselves to be squashed by me,’ I said. Nick looked puzzled. I explained about Heather. Nick laughed.

‘You’re perfect as you are,’ he said,’ starting to examine the photographs on the back of his digital camera. ‘I think the bride and groom will be happy with all these. I’ll have to get them all printed out this week.’

‘I thought you were going to London at the end of the week for your competition,’ I said. I didn’t want Nick to have forgotten about it.

‘I am,’ Nick said grinning. ‘I know I’m going to win it; I can’t wait.’

‘I’ll pick up your suit for you on Monday, if you’re busy,’ I said, thinking it would be the perfect opportunity to swop the suit.

‘Thanks, that would be great,’ said Nick. Soph’s mum beckoned him over to take a photograph of Soph with her two old aunts. Tash and Kaz were still gyrating on the dance floor.

There was a sound of a chair scraping next to me. I turned round. It was Paul. I stared at him in shock, like a rabbit caught in the headlights. What on earth was he doing coming to talk to me? He sat down and turned to face me. For a split second I considered jumping up and running out of the wedding. I hadn’t spoken to Paul since that fateful day at the cinema. I’d seen him from afar, watching him say his vows to Soph from a safe distance. But I’d never actually spoken to him again. He looked so handsome in his morning suit, with his cravat slightly twisted to one side. Whatever was he going to say? I could feel my cheeks flaming with embarrassment.

‘I know this is awkward,’ he said. ‘But I wanted to say I’m sorry for what happened.‘ He wiped his hands on the front of his trousers. I could see he was nervous. It had taken a lot for Paul to come over and speak to me. I took a deep breath and felt my cheeks start to cool down. ‘Whatever you might think, it wasn’t something I’d planned to do. I’d had a bad day at the office and when you rang to see where I was, I made the decision not to turn up. You had let me down those months before, and I thought at the time that I’d get my own back and stand you up.’ He looked down at his hands, and twisted his wedding ring around on his finger.

‘You didn’t need to arrange that second date in the first place, if you felt like that’ I said. ‘If you’d told me after that first date that you didn’t want to see me again I’d have understood.’

I looked over and could see Tash nudging Kaz on the dance floor and pointing over at us. Soph was watching anxiously from across the room. I felt like we were the lead characters in some tense drama. Should I throw a drink over Paul and march out dramatically. That would give everyone something to talk about. But on the other hand, it would be embarrassing. No, I would listen maturely to what Paul had to say.

‘I didn’t start off with the intention of standing you up,’ he carried on. ‘Please believe me. I enjoyed seeing you that first time again, and it was a spur of the moment decision. It was a stupid thing to do and I regret it. I’m sorry.‘

‘Why didn’t you call me afterwards to apologise?’ I asked. It was quite satisfying watching Paul trying to explain himself. It almost made up for the humiliation all those months ago.

He was still looking down at his knees. ‘I was embarrassed,‘ he admitted. ‘So I thought it would be best if I didn’t contact you again. And then I met Soph at the reunion and it became even more difficult.’

He glanced up and his brown eyes met mine. Our faces were only inches apart. If I’d wanted to, I could have reached out and taken his hand. How stupid we had both been to each other. If I hadn’t dumped him all those months ago, would it have been different. Would I have been stood now, being photographed with my two old aunts, with Paul by my side? But it was done now. He was married to Soph. And I had to let go.

‘You left me out in the rain,‘ I said, giving him a gentle punch on the shoulder. ‘Without an umbrella.’ He looked searchingly into my eyes. I laughed, putting him out of his misery. ‘But I had to admit, it was good revenge. I didn’t think you had it in you.’

Paul laughed too. I could see he was relieved. ‘No hard feelings then,’ he said, taking my hand and giving it a squeeze.

‘No, not any more,’ I said, smiling at him. And it did feel good to have forgiven Paul. I looked at Soph and she gave me a wink. I was proud of myself. Tash had always said that I carried a grudge longer than anyone she knew. I couldn’t believe it that I had actually just forgiven Paul. But I had to admit, it did feel easier. Like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

*********************************

CHAPTER TWENTY

Forgiving Paul had been one thing. As I had pointed out to Tash as we drunkenly left Soph’s wedding in a taxi in the early hours of the morning, it didn’t mean that suddenly all my lifelong grudges would disappear. There was still one major score to settle. On Monday morning I went in to the tailors to pick up Nick’s suit.

‘I need one a bit smaller after all,’ I said to the assistant. ‘There’s been a change of plan.’ The assistant looked surprised, but he went and got a jacket and trousers two sizes smaller.

I went back to the agency with the suit in a zipped up bag. I hung it on the back of Nick’s chair.

‘It’s all there for you,’ I said sweetly. I almost rubbed my hands together. This was going to be the perfect revenge on him.

I’d booked the same day off work and Tash, Rach, Kaz and I were all going to go to the zoo early so we could be waiting for Nick to turn up, waddling in his too tight trousers like a penguin. Soph was the only one who couldn’t come, as she was on honeymoon in the Maldives.

‘Send me a picture on your mobile phone,’ she had begged. ‘Then I won’t feel I’m missing out.

***

On Friday morning we all boarded the train to London. We arrived into Euston station mid-morning, and made our way out to the zoo.

‘His face is going to be a picture when he arrives,’ said Tash, with a laugh. ‘We will all have our cameras at the ready.’

We bought tickets at the entrance and then made our way over to the chimp house. I’d put on Nick’s letter that the presentation would start at 12 noon. I looked at my watch. It was 11.30am. He would be making his way to the zoo right now. I’d kept my mobile switched off all morning. I didn’t want an irate phone call from Nick, wailing that his suit was the wrong size.

We found a bench to the right of the chimp house to wait for Nick. I looked anxiously at my watch. It was now five to 12. Nick was pushing it now as the ‘ceremony’ had been supposed to start at 12.

‘What if he has worked out all along that it was me, and he hasn’t come?’ I fretted to Tash.

‘Oh he’ll be here alright,’ she said, reaching into her bag and pulling out a copy of Heat magazine. I shivered, pulling my coat around my shoulders.

‘Lucky old Soph, sunning herself in the Maldives,’ I grumbled, looking up at the sky. There was a few ominous grey clouds collecting overhead. Typical. It would just be my luck if my plan was washed out.

‘I can’t believe that Paul came over to talk to you at the wedding,’ Tash said. ‘How did you feel when he sat down next to you? You looked as though you were going to have a cardiac arrest on the spot.’

‘I was shocked,’ I admitted. ‘I never imagined that Paul would have the guts to come and speak to me like he did. Not many men would have faced up to what they had done like he did, especially on their wedding day.’