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Authors: Ian Doescher

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Whereon the observation platform rests.

ANAKIN

I sense Count Dooku.

OBI-WAN

—Yea, I sense a trap.

ANAKIN

How shall we then proceed?

OBI-WAN

—Our enemies
Have gone to all the trouble of a trap,
Wherein they do most fondly hope we’ll step.
’Twould be impolitic of us to then
Refuse their invitation. Aye, I say,
We’ll spring their trap and see if it shall hold.

R2-D2

[
aside:
] Shall they go thither sans their loyal droid?
[
To Obi-Wan and Anakin:
] Beep, meep?

ANAKIN

—I prithee, R2, stay thou here.

OBI-WAN

Take this comlink along with thee, R2,
And here await our orders.

R2-D2

—Beep, meep, hoo!
[Exit R2-D2.

Enter
G
ENERAL
G
RIEVOUS
and his
CAPTAIN
above, on balcony.

GRIEVOUS

What is the situation, Captain, eh?

CAPTAIN

Two Jedi have made landing in the bay,
Our hangar primary. We track them now.

GRIEVOUS

’Tis just as wise Count Dooku did declare—
His foresight does him credit, verily.
[Exeunt General Grievous and captain.

Enter
DROIDEKAS
,
firing on
O
BI
-W
AN
and
A
NAKIN
.

ANAKIN

Look, Master, ’tis destroyers come for us.
Belike our foes do know that we are here.

OBI-WAN

Into the lift, and flee these brutal droids.
[Exit droidekas as Obi-Wan and Anakin enter the lift.

Enter
BATTLE DROIDS
,
in lift.

DROID 2

Drop all your weapons on the instant, sirs.

DROID 3

Forsooth, forsooth.
[Obi-Wan and Anakin quickly slay all the battle droids.

OBI-WAN

—’Tis nearly merriment,
To ply our skill upon their feeble parts.
[The lift suddenly stops.
Hast thou depress’d the button for a stop?
Or mayhap thou requested some sharp pause?

ANAKIN

Nay, sir, not I. And ’twas not your design?

OBI-WAN

Not I.

ANAKIN

—We shall another exit take,
For ev’ry in doth have another out.
[Anakin begins cutting the ceiling of the lift with his lightsaber.

OBI-WAN

Yet out is not my wish, for i would move.
[
Into comlink:
] R2, canst thou now activate the lift,
Which number’d is three-one-one-seven-four?

Enter
R2-D2
above, on balcony, hiding, as two
SUPER BATTLE DROIDS
enter with him.

S. DROID 1

Those are, indeed, two Jedi fighter ships.

OBI-WAN

Come in, R2.

R2-D2

[
aside:
]          —Nay, not so loud, lest I
Shall be discover’d where I am conceal’d.

S. DROID 2

What is that sound?

OBI-WAN

—Canst hear me, R2? Fie!
[R2-D2 puts the comlink inside himself to muffle the sound.

S. DROID 1

’Tis naught of interest—back to thy work!

OBI-WAN

Pray activate three-one-one-seven-four.
[A part of the lift’s ceiling falls after being cut by Anakin’s lightsaber. He leaps on top of the lift.

ANAKIN

Thus am I out, and in the shaft may find
New possibilities for our escape.

OBI-WAN

[
aside:
] The youth is ever on the move, ’tis true.
[
Into comlink:
] R2, canst thou hear me? Pray, activate—
[R2-D2 plugs into the ship’s computer, and Obi-Wan’s lift begins to fall.

ANAKIN

I leap unto a ledge in time, but O—
My Master falleth in the metal lift.

OBI-WAN

R2, stop now! I need not down, but up!

R2-D2

[
aside:
] My clumsy circuits—Master, pray forgive!

S. DROID 1

Oi there! Thou tiny droid, what is’t thou dost?

R2-D2

[
aside:
] I must make haste, before these giant droids
Do make defeat of little R2’s life.
[The elevator stops suddenly and changes direction.

OBI-WAN

I’ll warrant that my guts another shift—
Of up and down or down and up again—
Shall not endure without some vital cost.
In short: I shall be sick if this doth last.
[
Into comlink:
] Well done, R2, thou hast it turn’d aright.
[R2-D2 is seized by Super Battle Droid 2.

R2-D2

Beep, squeak! [
Aside:
] My deed is done, but woe is me!

S. DROID 2

Thou foolish, naughty, ill-constructed droid!

Enter
BATTLE DROIDS
at the shaft door, where
A
NAKIN
S
KYWALKER
hangs
.

DROID 4

Your hands aloft be rais’d, you Jedi Knight.
[The battle droids realize that the lift is coming toward them.

ANAKIN

Your timing hits the mark, good Obi-Wan.

DROID 5

Our triumph turns to terror—so, farewell!
[As the lift passes by, the battle droids are crushed, and Anakin jumps inside with Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan brandishes his lightsaber.

OBI-WAN

What’s this, mine enemy? O, anakin,
’Tis well to see thee—thou art not some foe.
I shall put my blue-lighted friend away.

ANAKIN

Indeed, good Master, stow your lightsaber,
Lest one is injur’d by this friend of yours—
Do not, when you are scared, turn on your friend.

OBI-WAN

No; thou shalt.

ANAKIN

—What hath so unnerv’d you, sir?

OBI-WAN

R2 hath—

ANAKIN

—Prithee, keep your loose-wire japes
Unto yourself, my Master.

OBI-WAN

—Spoke I aught?

ANAKIN

The droid doth verily try best he can.

OBI-WAN

I said naught. Yet thy words are true: the droid
Is sometimes very trying.
[On the balcony, R2-D2 sprays oil into Super Battle Droid 1’s eyes.

S. DROID 1

—O, mine eyes!
Thou wretched, impish droid, I’ll see thee scrap.

R2-D2

[
aside:
] The oil was but the prelude to my tricks,
Feel ye my rockets as they fuel the flame.

S. DROID 2

Undone by such an astromech? For shame!
[R2-D2 engages his rockets, burning the oil below him and setting the two super battle droids aflame, destroying them. Exit R2-D2.

ANAKIN

We have arriv’d—the upper chamber’s here.

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