A Beautiful Rock (13 page)

God, here I am, crying again. I don’t think I’ve cried since the last time the press decided to rip me a new arsehole
. Why is it that so much emphasis has to be placed on the famous? Why can’t I just fall for whomever I choose and not have to worry about eyes looking over my shoulder?

Splashing my
face with cool water, I pat it dry with a cream coloured hand towel and try to calm down.

Looking into the mirror, I st
are into my honey coloured eyes and try to work through my thoughts as I take in my tired appearance.

It’s time for me to be very reasonable
and tell myself the hard truths that my hope won’t want to hear. Marcus Bailey is a rock star. He has probably slept with more women than I myself have met in my entire life (and I went to an all girls school). He is used to always getting what he wants and out of all the scenarios there are, it is most likely that he is only infatuated with me because I said no to him multiple times.

If I were a bookie, I would be taking bets on how long it would take for Marcus to get sick of me and go back to his old ways.
And if I were a gambler, I would bet that it would be the moment he went back on tour.

Now, here are my choices. I stay with Marcus, knowing that things will end badly, but stupidly hoping
in some sort of fairy tale ending OR, I can go out there, be honest with Marcus, and go home so I can start my life again.

As hard as it will be, I know that the latter is the best choice for me.
Marcus has everything to lose if he stays with me. Being associated with me will turn his fans against him and severely affect his career prospects. If I go, the media attention will only help him. And I, well, I have everything to lose as well.

I spent my life
in the public eye. First, as Jimmy Marx’s daughter, then as Jonathan Masters’ girlfriend and finally as a psycho, revenge seeking, bitch whom everyone loved to hate. I don’t want that life again – no matter how much I lo…like Marcus. I can’t turn my life into a circus.

Stepping out of the bathroom, I walk around the room and locate my shoes and handbag
before walking out into the living area, prepared to tell Marcus I’m going home – this isn’t going to work.

But the moment I set eyes on him,
he gives me this amazing smile that’s both happy and filled with relief. He doesn’t even need to tell me. I think I’ve known how to read him since we met – the entire time I was in the bathroom, he was out here worrying that I was going to somehow run off on him.

“Hey gorgeous. Feeling better?” he asks, holding his hand out to me. “Naomi and Theo brought coffee and pastries. I saved you the chocolate croissant.” He smiles as I slip my hand in his
feeling the hum of our connection traveling from his body and into mine.

I open my mouth, planning to say ‘I’m sorry, Marcus. You know this can’t work between us
.’ But instead, I say, “Thank you, that’s really thoughtful.”

He hands me my coffee and the croissant on a plate and kisses the side of my head as he does so. This small and
simple gesture touches my heart – he remembered what I ate when we went out together… how many men actually do that?

Thank god she’s ok. After the way she was acting when she went into the bathroom, I thought she’d be acting like I was the last person she wanted to be around. But when she looks at me, that connection is still there.
Thank god
.

“Thank you both
for bringing some supplies,” Lisa says to Theo and Naomi. “I mean, I know this must be really weird for you. You meet me kind of randomly and it turns out I’m well… you know the story.”

Theo, who was taking a sip from his takeaway coffee, lowers the cup and rests it on his knee. “Honestly, we’
re just glad Marcus stopped sulking long enough to call us.”

“
Oi,” I reprimand jokingly, wishing I had something to throw at him. “Watch it, or I’ll piss off for another two years.”

Naomi holds out her hand and shakes her head. “Oh no. Please don’t. I have my wedding dress chosen
, and I’m never getting married if you don’t come to the wedding.” She turns to Lisa and briefly explains. “Theo wants his whole family at the wedding and more importantly, he wants Marcus as best man. They were very close before the whole ‘Fuck you’ debacle,” she says, using her fingers for quotes before holding her hand beside her mouth and exaggerating her speech as if she’s only talking to Lisa, “which is what I’ve taken to calling it.”

Lisa smiles, and places her now empty plate on the table. “Yeah. I only recently saw that.
I questioned Marcus pretty heavily about that night.”

“Yeah. He told us last night. He said
talking to you helped him realise what a dick he’s been most of his life. I’ve been telling him he’s a dick for years. But he’s my little brother. He gets away with everything,” Theo adds. Immediately, he’s acting exactly how he always has around me. Except now, he’s that little more relaxed. It makes me wonder why I waited so long to speak to him again.

I laugh. “I
didn’t get away with shit. Mum and dad were just so worried about you all the time, Goth boy, that as long as I acted like a semi normal person, they were relieved,” I retort. It’s all in good humour surrounding Theo’s years as a tortured gothic artist. He barely spoke, dressed head to toe in black, and wore black and white make up that freaked our very traditional Italian heritage parents, and made them wonder if they were going to need an exorcist to snap him out of it.

Giving me a chuckle in response, he looks around my apartment
, taking in his surroundings for the first time since he got here. “So, have you got a studio set up in here?”

“I do,” I grin. “Wanna see it?”

“Is the pope catholic?”

“I can’t tell you how wonderful it is to see those two talking again,” Naomi says to me as she watches Theo and Marcus walk down the hall, laughing and joking together before they disappear into a room I’m yet to see.

“
If nothing good comes of all this, I’m glad it at least brought them together. I think Marcus has been very lonely doing this fame thing on his own,” I explain, taking a sip of coffee. The caffeine is certainly helping to wake up my sleep-deprived brain.

She tilts her head a little as if she’s studying me. “You don’t think you and Marcus getting together is a good thing?” she asks. “
He seems like a new man, and I can’t help but think it’s your influence that’s changed him. He’s more… grounded… happy.”

I cross my legs, pulling at the hem of my dress so it’s covering my knee. “
If we were regular people, I’d be saying an emphatic yes. But after what happened last night…” I pause, staring at my coffee cup in my hands as I shake my head. “How can being with a woman who the public hates be good for him or his career? His fans are already turning on him. His manager has threatened to ruin him… I just…” I shrug my shoulders and place my cup on the table. “I want to be with him. But I don’t see how.”

Naomi presses her lips together in an understanding smile. “
Listen, I’ve been on the wrong side of the press as well. When Marcus had his ‘fuck you’ moment, all the press wanted to do was talk to us about what happened. But Theo, myself and our other band members, decided that we would simply refuse to comment and ignore the whole affair. It was hard for me, because I got a fair bit of hate mail from fans who thought I chose the wrong brother. But, you know what? Fuck them. They don’t know me. They don’t know Theo, or Marcus for that matter, and they certainly don’t know you. Don’t let them win.”

Nodding, I lean back and fold my arms over my chest. “I wish it were that simple, Naomi.
But it’s not. Do you even know why they hate me so much? Do you remember what I did?”

She
nods her head. “Yeah. I do. It was everywhere.”

“Then you know how bad everything got. I couldn’t go anywhere without someone
calling me ‘whore’, ‘bitch’, ‘psycho’ or some derivative of all three. I had things thrown at me, my car, my house. I was spat on. God only knows how long it would have gone on for if I hadn’t decided to lie low and change my name. It’s the only way I could make it stop.”

She takes a breath to say something to me
, but Theo calling from down the hallway interrupts us. “Hey Nomes, get in here and see this set up he has. It shits all over the garage.”

Calling out that she’s coming, she stands and places a hand on my shoulder
, giving me a reassuring squeeze. “There’s something really special between you two. I feel it in the air when you’re near each other. Don’t give up on that. It isn’t easy to replace.”

Tears prick in my eyes as I swallow back my emotions and nod. “Ok.”

“I’ll be back in a minute,” she says quietly.

I sit and finish my coffee on my own
, running through every moment since Marcus and I met. My hope wants me to stay here and wait for them all to come back – to just pretend that everything will be fine. We’ll just ride it out and live together happily ever after.

But
, I’m a logical person. This can’t work, and I’m not strong enough to tell him I need to leave and actually go through with it.

Picking up my bag, I stand and walk as quietly as I can to the front door
and whisper, “I’m sorry,” as I quietly slip through it and leave like the chicken-shit-scum-of-the-earth bitch that I am.

“I think this is the first time I’ve actually hated you Marcus,” Naomi says after a while. She’s joking of course, but she’s referring to my recording room. It’s basically a miniature version of what you see at an actual studio.

I had it built-in
so I can lay down a demo track whenever it suits me without having to organise studio time. I haven’t had much of a chance to use it. But in the three months I’m taking off, I plan to use it a lot. I feel like I’m bursting with songs right now.

I chuckle as she and Theo play around with the equipment then excuse myself to get back to Lis
a. I feel like I’ve already been away from her for too long.

“Sorry about…that…” I say to the empty room where Lisa is su
pposed to be. She’s gone.
Shit!

My heart thuds in my chest and my mouth goes instantly dry as I start t
o panic. My eyes dart around for a moment before I race for the front door, opening it just in time to lock eyes with her as the lift doors close.

Shit.
“Lisa!” I yell, running to the lift and hitting the button. I’m too late, it’s already on the move.

The only choice I have is to take the stairs.
Flinging the door open, I burst out onto the landing and take the stairs at breakneck speed. The whole time I’m racing the elevator, I’m praying that she is ok, that the press hasn’t gotten to her before I do.

Reaching the downstairs lobby
, I burst out of the door and check the lifts. It’s still moving.
Fuck!

“Sir?” Serge questions as he sees the panicked look on my face.

I flick my gaze to him, just as the press outside sees me through the glass entryway.

“Marcus!” they call out, cameras flashing
as they push against the police barricade. Shit, I didn’t realise the crowd had gotten that bad, and there’s protestors as well.
They’re holding up signs with pictures of Lisa with an X over her face and there’s a rather graphic one of her as a spider with my head in her mouth…

Shaking the images from my mind
, I turn on my heel and re-enter the stairwell, racing down to the parking garage and hoping that I’m not too late.

***

A few minutes earlier…

“
Lisa!
”

My mouth drops open and I stumble backwards in surprise.
Marcus. He saw me. Shit. Fuck… oh god, I think I might vomit. What am I doing? Shit. I lean forward on my knees and breathe for a moment, convincing myself that I’m doing the right thing. He’ll find some other woman by tomorrow morning and all will be well with the world again.

But first, I need to get out of here.

My heart feels as though it’s wedged itself in my throat as I travel down to the parking garage. I’m hoping to be able to escape through there instead of the front entrance. This place is pretty secure and you need special keys and passes to get in, but getting out should be easier. I mean, there are laws pertaining to emergency exits and such. I just have to hope that I don’t set off any alarms.

I know what you’re thinking. I’m a total bitch. I’m not going to argue with you on that point but unless you’ve been through what I’ve been through, you’re not going to understand why I’m doing what I’m doing
. So I’m going to ask you to keep your judgement to yourself and just pray with me that Marcus isn’t going to catch up to me at the bottom.

This is for the best. Don’t let your hope and love for a happy ending get in the way of what the right thing is. This isn’t a movie. It’s real life. I need to be logical.

Regaining my composure, I stand up fully and smooth my hand over my hair. The lift pings and comes to a stop on the third floor. When the door opens, I wonder why the universe is fucking with my life. Because who should step on? Fucking Jonathan Masters.

“Leisil. What a pleasant surprise,” he grins as he steps in next to me.

I fold my arms protectively over my middle. “What are you doing here?”

He grins and bounces a shoulder nonchalantly. “Just visiting a friend. A lot of press out there today
. She feels like she can’t go outside.”

“And how does your fiancée feels about that?”

“She’s at a spa or something, somewhere. As long as she has the ring and the Platinum Card, she doesn’t question anything I do.”

“Ah, true love,” I sigh mockingly, batting my
eyelashes at him. The lift opens in the car park and I step out in front of him. Pausing for a moment while I survey the area for a way to get out.

“Lost your car?” he asks.

“No, I’ve just lost my mind and my right to a quiet life, but as long as you’re happy…” I retort. Just seeing him again makes me so angry. I feel like running a car into his house all over again right now.

“Listen, Leisil. Despite everything that’s happened – I don’t hate you. I’m sorry the press are after you again. If you need he
lp sneaking out - I’ll help you.”

I respond with a suspicious
look, which garners a laugh from him.

“Come on Leis, you know me. I may be a philanderer,
but I’m not a vindictive person. I would never throw you to the wolves. You can hide in the back seat of my car and I’ll get you out of here. That’s what you want isn’t it? You’re trying to run off again?”

Meeting his eyes, I nod.

“Then let me help you.”

I take a deep breath. “Ok”