A Bit of Me (14 page)

Chase had tried not to eavesdrop when he’d walked through the living room, but he’d

heard Xavier’s name, and damn it, after almost a week of constantly fantasising about the man—and being pissed about it—Chase hadn’t been able to stop listening in. Discreetly, of course. Chase had planted both feet beside Josh and stared blatantly at him as he sat on the couch snuggled up to Nick. Josh had given him a serious look and arched both eyebrows, but Chase hadn’t budged. He was pretty sure he’d used the words ‘worried about’ right before Xavier’s name. Chase didn’t see any reason to pretend he wasn’t interested in the

conversation.

And damn, if Josh hadn’t got this smug, knowing look in his eyes. Nick had too, but

he’d given this sympathetic smile that had warmed Chase as much as it confused him.

Confusion seemed to be his constant state lately, well, one of them. Toss in horny, worried and angry and Chase’s emotional range was about covered.

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Josh finally finished the call and turned to Nick. He patted the man’s thigh, then stood up and tugged on Nick’s hand. Chase was on the verge of demanding to know what that

phone call was all about when Josh said, “Come on, Nick, we’re meeting Adam and Les at The Xxchange. Billy called them, seems he’s a bit concerned about some guy at the club who’s all over Xavier.”

Nick huffed and shook his head. “Josh, Xavier’s a grown man. I’m pretty sure he can

handle himself and whoever it is trying to get in his pants. Christ, the man probably needs to get laid and y’all are going to go charging in there and ruin it for him!”

Chase’s mind blanked in a red haze as his body went hot then cold. He didn’t agree

with Nick’s reply it even if it was likely true. Chase opened his mouth up to snarl something he would have regretted, maybe, but Josh spoke over him.

“Well, see, that’s the thing. Apparently Xavier doesn’t usually act like this, and Billy is just concerned. Liam had to go back home, and Billy didn’t know who else to talk to about it so he called Adam. No one is planning on ruining Xavier’s night, we just want to make sure he doesn’t do something he regrets.” The last part of that sentence was said with a glance at Chase that set his teeth on edge. “Or maybe we just want to see who the lucky man is who’s going to get laid by Xavier tonight,” Josh added, with a challenging look at Chase.

After a week of touching himself in ways he hadn’t ever thought he would, all because of Xavier Talbot, Chase was nearly stupid with lust. Nearly. He crossed his arms over his chest and stared Josh down. Pink flooded Josh’s cheeks, but he didn’t look away.

“You aren’t worried about Xavier,” Chase snapped, narrowing his eyes as the pieces fell into place. “You’re just trying to piss me off enough to get me to go to him.”

Josh rolled his eyes and huffed before focusing on Chase again. He crossed his arms

over his chest, mirroring Chase’s stance. “Actually, after the way you’ve been snapping at everybody and glaring daggers every time someone mentions Billy and Liam—up until you found out they weren’t in a ménage with Xavier—I
do
think you should at least let Xavier know you’re interested.”

“I’m not—” Chase began, then shut his mouth. If he couldn’t deny it honestly, he’d best just shut the hell up.

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“Right,” Josh said, sarcastically. “Whatever. If you’re not going to make a play for him, then you’ve got no right to get angry when someone else does.” Josh’s expression softened into one filled with understanding. Chase wanted to run back into his room and hide. He didn’t know what to do with someone like Josh, who wore his emotions so openly. Josh placed a hand on Chase’s clenched fist. “Look, I don’t mean to be a bitch. I’m sure you have reasons for being the way you are, and I’m not asking you to tell me. If you want to—”

Chase shook his head emphatically. Josh continued on as if he hadn’t bothered.

“—then that’s great, I will be happy to listen, but if not, that’s fine, too. You’re certainly entitled to your secrets. Just, sometimes secrets eat away at you from the inside.” Josh patted his hand, and Chase unthinkingly unclenched his fist and wound his fingers through Josh’s.

It was a small comfort, another step in their budding friendship that, luckily, Josh didn’t make a big deal of. “But in regards to Xavier, Billy is actually worried for another reason. The guy all over Xavier looks familiar, but he can’t place him and it’s really creeping Billy out. He doesn’t know if he’s just being paranoid because it’s been a long time since Xavier’s bothered picking up anybody, or if he has a reason to be concerned. And since he’s working the bar because the regular bartender got sick, Billy’s kind of stuck behind there.”

Chase studied Josh for a long moment, looking for any signs of deceit. He couldn’t find any, and felt like an asshole for trying. “Sorry,” he muttered, knowing Josh would

understand why. Josh squeezed his hand lightly, then lifted. Chase wasn’t expecting the touch to his cheek that drew his gaze back to Josh’s.

“It’s okay,” Josh assured him in a soothing voice. “I know how confusing it is, being attracted to someone when you don’t want to be—at first,” he added when Nick groused. “I get being scared. I can totally understand and support you even if you decide you want nothing to do with Xavier—even though the air fairly snaps and pops with the attraction between the two of you. That doesn’t mean you have to act on it. Stay here if that’s what you want to do. No pressure, no guilt, okay?” Josh ended his speech with a quick peck to Chase’s cheek that left Chase stunned. It wasn’t that there was anything to the chaste kiss, it was simply that Josh had even bothered…and that Nick wasn’t trying to kill Chase for it.

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Nick must have seen the question in Chase’s eyes because he grinned loopily as he

wrapped his arms around Josh and explained. “He’s got a big heart, and I wouldn’t ever try to fence that in. And besides, he loves
me.
”

Chase wrinkled his nose as the two lovers went to get ready to go to the club. That had been just a little too syrupy sweet there at the end. Between Josh and Nick and Bo and Max, Chase was afraid he might turn into a giant mush ball himself, coated in flowery sugared words and touches.

Fuck, stop thinking shit like that!
Chase ran every curse word he knew through his head, in English and Spanish, until he felt a bit dirty. It was a more comfortable, familiar sensation than the other warm fuzzy one.

“We’ll be back later,” Josh said as he and Nick strode back into the living room. Both men looked sexy although they were dressed as different as night and day. Nick was all cowboyed out in his Stetson, pearl snap plaid shirt, tight faded Wranglers and slightly scuffed boots. Josh had on some pink leather pants that were so tight Chase could clearly make out his cock and balls, the sight of which shoved a sputtering cough from Chase’s lungs and had his gaze shooting up to Josh’s then Nick’s.

Nick’s smile was wickedness in the flesh as he winked at Chase and stroked a hand

down Josh’s hip. “I know, he’s fucking edible, ain’t he?”

Josh snickered and fingered his artfully torn T-shirt as he glanced up at Nick. “And you
do
plan to eat me later, right?”

Nick’s answer was murmured in Josh’s ear, but judging from the flush that spread up

from the exposed skin on Josh’s chest all the way up to the roots of his hair, Chase figured whatever Nick said must have fired all Josh’s cylinders. Chase refused to let his eyes dip down and check Josh’s reaction
there.

“All right, we have to get going. If you need anything, call.” Josh waved and started for the front door, Nick practically walking with his eyes glued to Josh’s ass. “Wish you’d have worn your leathers, Nick,” Josh said over his shoulder.

Chase couldn’t picture that and didn’t try very hard because his feet were moving even as his mind wondered what the fuck was happening. He was on the porch and calling out before Josh and Nick made it to their truck.

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Xavier had to stoop a little as well as crane his neck uncomfortably in order to get down low enough to hear what Paulie was saying. They were both sweaty and loose from

dancing—Paulie knew moves that would put any stripper to shame, but he hadn’t pushed Xavier, really. Just sort of used him as a stripper pole half the time, and Xavier hadn’t objected. In fact, he was kind of wavering on the whole ‘not interested’ thing. He figured it was the typical interested-suddenly-because-the-other-guy-isn’t thing that happened. There was just something about the chase.
Chase.

His attempt to listen to Paulie evaporated under a wash of tingling warmth that

crawled over him simply from thinking Chase’s name. Xavier’s cock grew hard and

insistently pressed against his zipper. He could feel each beat of his heart in that part. Xavier tried to focus on Paulie’s cute features, but all he could see was Chase—wounded, angry, his need rolling off him in waves and calling to Xavier.

Xavier straightened up, only then becoming aware of the less noisy atmosphere, which meant the band must be on break, and of Paulie’s hand on his hip. He didn’t want Paulie, not really. He wanted Chase, and dipping his dick in any available man wasn’t going to make that change. Xavier thought himself a better man than to use a stranger to slake the desire for someone else. That would just lead to frustration on his part, and it certainly wasn’t fair to the other man.

He took a half-step back and bumped into the wall. Paulie looked up at him

expectantly. “Do you want a drink?” Xavier blurted out, feeling unexpectedly uncomfortable.

Paulie raked his gaze over Xavier, then nodded. “I’ll get them. What do you want?”

Xavier shook his head before the other man finished answering. Having owned the club for years, Xavier had learned to be very cautious when it came to his drinks. He didn’t know Paulie well enough to trust the man not to spike it.

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And yet I considered fucking him?
Xavier wanted to kick his own ass for being such an idiot. He wasn’t some horny, desperate guy…well, not usually, but he
was
a mess, obviously.

The whole thing with Chase had apparently fried a few of Xavier’s brain cells.

Xavier was relieved when Paulie only said what he wanted to drink and didn’t tag

along with him to the bar. Billy had been giving him worried looks all night, which Xavier took to mean he was acting enough out of character that it was freaking Billy out. He’d talk to Billy later, after the club closed and put his mind at ease.

For now, though, Billy was grinning and batting his lashes at the men lining the bar.

Xavier had to grin as well, because Billy, with his newly found confidence, was definitely a sight to see. He didn’t envy Liam any, though; he was going to have to swat the men away much like he’d swat a swarm of mosquitoes. Not that Billy was encouraging any of them, but people could be stupid and see what they wished was happening instead of reality.

Instead of waiting for Billy, Xavier stepped behind the bar and helped the younger man out for a few minutes. If he glared a warning here or there…or in one instance, threatened to knock the sense into someone…Xavier figured that was fine. He would always want to take care of Billy, but he was learning not to let it get out of control, and to accept that Billy was a grown man.

The little twinge to his heart was familiar to Xavier and made his lips curl up as he mixed Paulie’s drink. For himself, he fixed a glass of juice. The last thing he needed was to drink anything alcoholic at this point.

With a nod to Billy, who seemed to have the herd at the bar under control, Xavier left and headed back to the hallway where he’d left Paulie. If he had any kind of luck at all, the guy would have taken off to find someone more interested. Or interested, period. Seeing that happy glow on Billy’s face had driven the point home to Xavier that he wanted something that made him feel the way Billy looked, not something that made him feel good for a little while, then kinda scuzzy after.

He sighed internally when he saw Paulie leaning against the wall in the dim hallway.

Of course it couldn’t be so easy, and why should it be? Even though Xavier had said he wasn’t interested, he hadn’t exactly stopped Paulie from climbing all over him earlier when they were dancing.

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Xavier handed Paulie his drink. “Thanks. So…” Paulie took a sip. “I’m getting the

feeling you really aren’t into me.”

Xavier grimaced around the mouthful of juice and swallowed, the tangy flavour

tingling along his tongue. He sighed and lowered his glass. “It isn’t you in particular. I just—

this isn’t me, not anymore.”

Paulie’s grin looked off, as did something in his eyes, but Xavier put it down to hurt pride. He couldn’t blame the man. “It’s not me, it’s you? Like I haven’t heard that one before.”

“I’m sorry,” Xavier said truthfully. “I shouldn’t have even been out here tonight.” He didn’t think adding there was someone else on his mind was a wise thing to do at this point.

“I’m just out of sorts. My—well, he’s like my son, the man at the bar, and he’s fixing to move away and I’m just…”

Paulie’s eyes narrowed. “Right. The guy at the bar’s like your son. Okay.”

Xavier felt a flicker of annoyance that was threatening to turn in to something more powerful, but he shoved it down. “Believe it or not, I don’t care. Billy’s family to me. You don’t have to understand or accept it.”