A Bit of Me (18 page)

kneaded the firm globes while he sucked Chase’s nipple, drawing long moans and shaky whimpers from him.

Xavier’s own need pounded at him, thrumming through his veins, fuelled by every

desperate sound that left Chase’s lips. He nipped Chase’s chest hard enough to make him cry out, then released the turgid nub. It was a struggle to lift himself off Chase, but Xavier needed more than this. He had to feel skin on skin or he’d lose his mind. He started to grab Chase’s wrists when he fisted his hands in Xavier’s hair, but a flashing image in his mind of Chase pinned and panicked stopped him cold.

Instead he brought his hands back up and pushed at the insides of Chase’s arms. “Let me up so we can do this right,” Xavier said, when Chase looked at him. The scowl that had www.total-e-bound.com

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been forming slipped away and Chase nodded as he untangled his fingers. Xavier lifted himself up and reached for Chase’s belt. A shred of logic inserted itself into his plan and he dropped to his knees instead and quickly removed Chase’s boots before taking off his own.

Then he grabbed the buckle and unfastened it, his gaze darting from the swell of Chase’s erection up to his eyes.

Xavier’s fingers stilled as something flickered over Chase’s expression, and then the man was sitting up, reaching out. Xavier had a moment of heart shattering disappointment when he thought Chase meant to shove him away before his shirt was grasped and shoved up.

“You too,” Chase demanded. “Strip.”

Xavier would have, but Chase seemed determined to do it for him. His shirt was

whipped off with a hard tug that nearly took Xavier’s nose and ears with it. Those parts were stinging and ringing when Chase grabbed his belt and opened it with a nimble flick of his wrist. Chase unbuttoned and unzipped Xavier’s pants in an equally efficient manner, then he was leaning forwards, down, his hands pushing at the material as Xavier’s cock bounced free of its confines.

And Chase kept coming forwards, kept leaning down until the tip of Xavier’s cock was encased in silky wet heat. Xavier hissed and started to reach for Chase’s head, wanting to fuck that mouth like he’d dreamed about doing so many times, but a bolt of fear sliced through his lust. Chase might freak out if Xavier held onto him, if he forced him to be still and plunged his dick into that slick cavern over and over until he came.

Chase sucked in another inch, his tongue teasing at Xavier’s frenulum, and Xavier knew he couldn’t get through this without trying to take control. He’d dreamt of this too many times, longed for it in the endless hours when he couldn’t sleep. And now he couldn’t have it, because if he did, he might well ruin any chance he had with Chase.

“No,” Xavier said, settling a hand along Chase’s jaw. Chase looked up at him like he was crazy, and sucked. Hard. Xavier’s thighs quivered and his hips jutted before he could stop them, his body instinctively trying to get his dick deeper into that talented mouth. If this didn’t stop soon, he was going to pound into Chase until he poured his cum down Chase’s throat. “No.” Xavier made it an order as he tightened his hold on Chase’s jaw. “Not like this.

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All I can think about is holding you still and fucking your mouth until I come, and I promised I wouldn’t use you.”

Chase narrowed his eyes and flicked his tongue, as if considering whether or not to

press the issue. His gaze flickered over every inch of Xavier’s face, and what he saw there must have convinced him Xavier spoke the truth. He released Xavier’s cock with a wet slurp, darting his tongue over the leaking slit before glaring at Xavier.

“I don’t—” Chase huffed, and started again. “I
won’t
be held still or held down or anything else like that. Try it and you’ll find yourself in a world of hurt.”

Xavier nodded and risked running a finger around Chase’s glistening lips. That he

didn’t pull away from him or bite his finger off reassured Xavier more than words could have. “I know you won’t be held down, or still, which is why I warned you. My control was shaky, I’ve spent too much time thinking about you sucking me like that, and”—Xavier shrugged—“I wouldn’t hurt you, not like that.”

Chase watched him for a moment. Xavier could see the question forming and smiled

when it came. “‘Not like that’? So you
would
hurt me in other ways?” Chase’s scowl didn’t look as fierce as it usually did, so Xavier figured the man had an idea where this was going, but it was always best to be clear and up front.

And an example didn’t hurt either. Xavier rubbed his thumbs over Chase’s nipples.

Chase gasped and jerked like he’d sat on a livewire. “You enjoyed that, didn’t you?” Chase’s answer turned into a moan as Xavier lightly pinched the warm, swollen nubs. “And it’s a different kind of pain, isn’t it, than when someone is deliberately trying to hurt you and make you suffer. Isn’t it?” Xavier emphasised his point by tweaking Chase’s nipples again.

Chase’s eyes glazed and his head tipped back as he panted for several seconds. “Oh g-god damn it,” he stuttered out when Xavier repeated the motion. “Xavier, what are

you…I—” Another long moan was wrung from Chase as Xavier dragged his blunt nails over Chase’s pecs, catching a few hairs along the way. He wasn’t leaving anything that wouldn’t go away in an hour or two, but he was definitely applying enough pressure so that Chase would feel it.

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Chase shuddered so hard his teeth clacked together. Xavier let up on the pressure and gently stroked the red marks he’d left on Chase’s chest. Chase took several shaky breaths before raising his head and looking at Xavier.

“What do you want from me?” Chase asked. “Right now, as of this moment?”

Xavier was afraid to give Chase his full answer—he wanted Chase, period, for more

than one night. He wanted for them to build the relationship Xavier knew they could have.

He wanted to love Chase, and be loved by him in return. But he couldn’t tell Chase that, not yet. And he must have taken too long to answer, because Chase was looking irritated and nervous and darting glances at the door, and Xavier couldn’t think of what part of his confession he should give—

“You said you didn’t want this to be a one-time thing,” Chase said, with not a little accusation in his voice and eyes. “You said you didn’t want to use me or be used and you won’t bottom. So what
do
you want?”

“A chance,” Xavier answered, without having to give it thought. “I want a chance to see if we can have something lasting between us—a relationship,” he clarified, figuring it best not to give Chase any leeway for misinterpretation. “I want to be able to hold you, make love with you, and not worry you’ll be gone before I wake up. I want to explore this attraction between us, I want—” Xavier bit off the rest of that sentence. He’d already blabbed enough, he didn’t need to add that he wanted to know the reason why Chase was so afraid to let anyone close to him. “What do you want?” he asked, turning the question around on Chase.

“Do you really just want one night stands the rest of your life? To never have anyone you can trust, who you know cares for you more than themselves?”

Chase averted his gaze as his body went tight. “I don’t know. I want you. I thought if we could just…you know, get off, then we’d both be over it.” He looked at Xavier. There was so much fear and doubt in his eyes that Xavier had to touch him. Xavier wanted to hold Chase, but settled for running his fingertips down the side of Chase’s neck. Chase’s eyelids slid almost shut and he shivered as he moved closer. “I’m afraid we won’t. Be over it. And I’m afraid we will. I don’t
know
what I want, but I don’t think I can walk out of here now.”

It wasn’t a promise of forever or even to stay afterwards, and it wasn’t the reassurance Xavier would have liked, but…it was something. Coming from Chase, Xavier thought it was www.total-e-bound.com

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probably a lot. There was so much need buried in those words, so much showing in Chase’s eyes and the tense lines of his shoulders. Xavier would take it, and hope that he wasn’t the only one already emotionally involved in what he hoped was a burgeoning relationship.

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Chase hoped he wasn’t making a huge mistake. The idea of having more than a night

with Xavier scared him, but not as much as the thought of never having the man at all. And he knew he couldn’t sneak out after, he’d kind of given his word in a way. At least, in his opinion he had when he hadn’t turned away and got dressed and walked out of here.

Now he was standing bare-ass naked with an equally naked man who wanted him in

ways that Chase couldn’t fathom. Well, he got the sex part, although he wasn’t sure he would let Xavier fuck him. Chase snorted softly.
Yeah, right, because you didn’t cream your jeans
when he rubbed against your asshole, didn’t come with the image of him buried to the hilt there, filling
you up like no one ever has before. Don’t be a stupid fuck.

He needed to stop thinking before he scared himself out of even giving this a shot.

Taking a deep breath, he tried to relax his muscles as he glanced at Xavier. He felt as nervous as a butterfly in a roomful of cats. “What do you want to do?” And now he felt like an idiot, too.

Xavier only smiled in a way that made Chase’s chest feel all warm and tingly. He

hooked his hand around Chase’s nape and pulled him closer, bringing their nude bodies together. Chase’s mouth opened on a gasp as he felt Xavier’s hard dick pressing against his stomach.

“This,” Xavier said, then bent and took Chase’s mouth in a kiss so gentle it made his eyes sting. Chase brought his shaky hands to Xavier’s shoulders and held on since the kiss made his knees weak. One of Xavier’s thighs pushed between Chase’s legs, pressing up against his balls, and it felt so, so much better than it had earlier when they were both clothed. Then Xavier ran a hand down Chase’s back, taking his time over the ridges of Chase’s spine before dipping into his crease.

Chase thought he should be scared or nervous or angry—or something other than so

turned on he couldn’t be still. He slid his arms up and locked them behind Xavier’s neck, then arched his back, trying to get those fingers to sink a little deeper into his crack.

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Xavier hummed his approval into the kiss, setting a flurry of fluttery things loose in Chase’s stomach. He suckled on Xavier’s slick tongue as he whimpered, a sound he’d never thought he’d make, but he was desperate to feel Xavier’s fingers…
Oh God!

“Right there,” Chase rasped as Xavier finally brushed his fingertips over Chase’s hole.

“Ohmigod!” Chase panted against Xavier’s lips as each wrinkled fold was traced. “Xavier!”

Chase began to quake, need churning in him as Xavier used his fingers to tease and taunt.

Xavier’s slipped his other hand between them and squeezed the base of Chase’s cock before moving lower to cup his balls.

Pleasure was ricocheting through Chase like a pinball and Xavier hadn’t even done

anything to him yet—other than kiss him and just…touch. Chase didn’t understand it, and the press of fingers against his hole shattered any hope he might have had of doing so.

Xavier repeated the touch, not penetrating, just pressing, while tugging on Chase’s balls. The dual assault of pleasure and pain was almost too much. Chase jerked, then sagged against Xavier, his body a raging inferno of so many confusing feelings he couldn’t comprehend any of them.

“Come here,” Xavier murmured, and Chase couldn’t figure out what he meant, either,

because he was already plastered to Xavier like a second skin. Then the room whirled and dipped, and Chase felt the cool wooden surface of the desk under his back. His legs were lifted, positioned much as they had been before except his feet weren’t near the edge because Xavier had crawled up onto the desk, too. Xavier’s legs were between Chase’s, spreading him wide and exposing everything. Chase was a little embarrassed about having his ass open like that, but Xavier planted a hand beside his head and dropped down over him, not lying on Chase, but hovering just above him.

“Now, where were we?” Xavier purred in a way that made Chase’s ass clench and his

dick leak pre-cum. His nipples throbbed as if they’d been stimulated anew, and that added pleasure shot through Chase’s chest. Chase tried to keep his eyes open, but Xavier was so fucking sexy with his dark eyes gleaming and his skin flushed with desire. Chase was afraid he’d shoot in a heartbeat if he kept looking at Xavier. He closed his eyes just as Xavier crushed their lips together, and unlike the kiss moments ago, there was nothing gentle about it.

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This was a kiss filled with need—physical and emotional. But he was too turned on to be scared or nervous or anything other than horny. At this rate, he’d end up with brain damage if he didn’t get some of the blood flowing back upstairs soon.

Chase whimpered when Xavier caught his bottom lip between his teeth and nipped.

His nipples ached in sympathy, or jealousy, he didn’t care which. Then Xavier licked the line of Chase’s jaw, stopping to nibble every few seconds before finding a spot on Chase’s neck that made him shout as Xavier sucked. Chase knew he was being marked,
and he liked it!

And he would leave marks of his own. He brushed his lips over the tempting swell of Xavier’s chest and Chase bit. He curled his fingers over Xavier’s biceps, digging into hard muscle, marking them as his own. Xavier grunted when he started to sit up and Chase didn’t immediately release his treat. When Chase did, Xavier traced a finger over Chase’s lips, pressing in to rub the edge of his teeth.