A Family This Christmas (4 page)

* * *

‘Where do you think you’re going?’ Cam shoved his hands in his pockets and rested a shoulder against the doorframe of Jenny’s hospital room, watching as she leaned against the bed. So slim, yet physically as strong as a whippet. The frailty was in her eyes, not her body.

Her head shot up so fast he heard vertebrae click, saw her wince. ‘Don’t sneak up on me like that.’ Guilt darkened those green eyes glittering at him fiercely, reminding him of the sea when the kahawai were churning it up as they chased smaller fish.

‘You were so engrossed in being stealthy you didn’t hear me coming along the ward.’ He couldn’t hold back his smile any longer. It had been growing from the moment he’d seen her juggling her crutches and trying to pick up her bag from the chair. Which really should be a warning to hightail it out of there, instead of getting involved with her. He should be thinking apology here, not getting up close and interested in Jenny Bostock, pretty woman and sometime doctor.

‘I was not.’ Her turn to smile, though hers appeared very strained.

Shaking his head at her, he crossed to pick up her case himself. ‘Give up arguing with me. I live with two experts, remember?’

‘Where are you taking my case?’ All pretence of smiling disappeared. ‘Seriously, Cam, what do you think you’re doing?’

‘Taking you home.’ So much for finesse. That must’ve gone down the plughole with the dishwater that morning. Had he thought he could railroad her into coming along quietly? If he had then he needed a brain scan. ‘We have a spare bedroom available. You can hole up there for as long as you like. Once you’re mobile again, as in using those crutches with more aptitude, we have cafés and a bakery, jewellery and fudge shops, all for you get lost in for hours on end.’

‘I don’t do shops. Not lately, at any rate. Though the café could be a plus.’ Bewilderment etched her face. Maybe a bit of hope was in there, too. ‘Is there a motel in Havelock?’

Had he really expected her to be thrilled about this? ‘Backpackers’ accommodation only.’

‘Oh.’ Her gaze dropped from him to her case and then to her crutches. She seemed to be weighing up her options.

He helped her along with making up her mind. ‘The boys have got your room ready. They’re really excited about having a visitor, even a practically useless one who won’t be playing cricket on the front lawn any time soon.’

‘You play dirty.’ Her forefinger tapped the handle of one of the crutches.

Not normally, but he couldn’t walk out of here leaving Jenny to her own devices. She was ill prepared to go it alone for the next few days. ‘Trying to make it easier for you to accept. You can leave any time you like, straight after dinner if you want to.’

‘I see.’ Tap, tap, tap went her finger on the crutch. ‘What about your wife? Or did you bully her into this as well?’

Now who was playing dirty? ‘I’m divorced.’ Was he a slow learner, or what? Jenny was gorgeous, but she might not be any more trustworthy than his ex had been. So what? This was going to be a brief stay, not a lifelong one.

She sucked in air. ‘I’m sorry, but I needed to know. Not about your divorce but that I wasn’t treading on anyone’s toes.’

‘You’re not treading on anything at the moment,’ Cam quipped, in an effort to dispel his unease, but then thoughtlessly asked, ‘You heard the boys saying they’d seen their mother yesterday?’

‘Yes.’

‘They hadn’t. She lives in Auckland, last I heard.’ That’s all she needed to know. Probably out-of-date news anyway.

‘That must be hard for all of you. Do they make a habit of seeing their mum in places she’s not?’

‘Unfortunately, yes. Margaret—my ex—left rather abruptly two years ago.’ That’s definitely all he was saying. Jenny had cleverly sidetracked him from his mission. ‘Jenny, you are in a bind, partly due to my sons’ antics. I don’t know why you don’t want to go home, wherever that is, but I’m more than happy to help you out until you’re up and running again. That’s all I’m offering. Though be warned, life in our house is hectic and noisy, but during the day you’ll have peace and quiet while the boys are at school. Take it or leave it.’

He studied her small case. She travelled light, if this and what was in her car was anything to go by. His sisters would think Jenny needed lessons on what to take away on a trip, but then she’d need a truck, not a sports car.

She swung the crutches, took two wonky steps. Her eyes locked with his as she tipped her head to one side. Sizing him up?

He went for broke, lifted the case and headed for the door. ‘Coming?’

The silence was deafening. He kept walking, slowly so that if she decided to join him she wouldn’t feel compelled to hurry. Why so little luggage? Those medical journals in her boot were hardly scintillating reading for a trip.

Clump, thump. She was moving, hopping on those sticks. Clump, thump.

Cam relaxed and kept walking, slowing even more.

Clump, thump.

Warmth spread through him. Jenny was coming home with him. He hadn’t realised how much he wanted this until faced with the real possibility she’d turn him down. Being pushy had worked.

‘I guess Havelock is as good a place to be as Blenheim.’

‘Better, as far as I’m concerned. More community spirited.’ Something he’d come to appreciate. It had taken time for him to get used to living in such a small place after spending ten years in Wellington. Nowadays he doubted he’d cope with the stress of city living with two young boys to keep a firm hand on.

‘Only until I’ve got the hang of these damned things.’ Bang, bang, the crutches slammed down on the floor. ‘A couple of days at the most.’

‘Sure.’ The warmth spread. He’d asked out of guilt and yet now he was feeling good about the whole situation.
Steady, boy, steady. You might’ve leapt into the deepest part of the pond and have no way of surviving.

‘There she is.’

‘Hello, Jenny. Are you coming to our house?’ The twins mobbed her, threatening her precarious balance.

But before Cam got a word out Jenny was laughing with them and saying, ‘How can I refuse that welcome?’

He hadn’t got a laugh, or even a thank you. Did he need to take lessons from his sons on how to get onside with a pretty woman?

‘Boys, wait here with Jenny while I bring the car to the door. Mind those crutches, will you?’

As he stepped out into the sunshine he heard Marcus asking, ‘Can we have a go on the crutches later? They’re cool.’

Unfortunately the doors slid shut before he heard Jenny’s reply, but something told him she’d have agreed. She got on with the boys so easily. As long as she didn’t get too close and they got hurt when she left. He’d knew too well the devastation their mother had caused them when she’d walked away. But what were the odds Jenny would stay more than a night, two at the most? How attached could Marcus and Andrew get in that short time?

How attached would he get? He so wasn’t ready to trust his heart again. Doubted he ever would be.

No getting away from the fact this had definitely been the dumbest idea he’d ever come up with. Not once had he factored the boys’ hearts into the equation, let alone his own.
Blast you, Margaret, for doing this to us.
How long did it take for youngsters to truly understand what being abandoned by their mother meant? Or did they already get it and this searching for her was just part of the acceptance process?

Note to self:
go see a shrink and get my head space tidied up so I understand my boys and don’t make stupid mistakes about a woman with beautiful eyes that I could drown in.

CHAPTER FOUR

‘I’
VE
NEVER
BEEN
treated like royalty before.’ Jenny smiled at the twins as a glass of chilled water slid onto the top of the small table beside the chair she’d been banished to. At least the lounge, dining area and kitchen all ran together so she didn’t feel isolated from what everyone was up to. ‘I could get used to this.’

‘Dad said we had to make you—’

‘Comfortable and get anything you need.’

Cam spoke from behind the kitchen counter. ‘That also means not bothering Jenny all the time.’

Jenny spoke up before an argument ensued. ‘Guys, maybe we could play a game on the computer or something later?’

The boys high-fived each other and shouted ‘Yes’ at the tops of their voices.

Cam nodded at them. ‘That means you can go outside to play now.’

She watched them scrambling over each other in their haste to go out into the yard, then asked Cam, ‘Do they ever slow down?’

‘Exhausting to watch, aren’t they?’ That half smile appeared as his gaze followed his sons. ‘You look sleepy. Do you want to go to bed for a while?’

That had to be the most uninviting invitation to bed she’d ever had. How would that deep, gravelly voice sound if he was really asking her to take a romp in bed? And why did she even want to know? Shaking her head abruptly, she looked up into the steadiest brown gaze she’d seen in a long time. A hint of amusement shone out at her. Had he picked up on her reaction to his question? Probably. Ouch.

‘Jenny? You’re space tripping.’ His gaze was still locked with hers. Odd, really. Usually people who knew her and what had happened tended to look away. But, then, Cam hadn’t a clue about her life up until yesterday.

‘If it’s all the same to you I’ll stay right where I am. If I do nod off, don’t insist on the boys being quiet. That’d make me feel bad.’ She’d caused enough trouble for this family already.

‘We’re having a barbecue. Steak all right with you?’

‘Perfect. Can I make the salad?’ Though right at this moment telling the difference between a tomato and a cucumber might be difficult.

Her question got her a small smile. ‘I don’t think so.’

‘Had to offer.’ Actually, she felt glad he’d turned her down. Those crutches were turning out to be a little trickier to master than she’d have believed. His kitchen was safer without her clunking around in there.

‘Is there anything you don’t like to eat?’ Cam asked.

‘Tripe, Brussels sprouts and broad beans.’

‘You’re more than safe here.’

As Cam dug around in the pantry she studied his back view and found it still very delectable now her brain was clear of drugs and post-op fog. But, of course, finding herself here with a man she barely knew, she was bound to be overreacting to all sorts of things. Then Cam turned to place bottles of sauces on the counter and caught her staring.

‘Yes?’ His eyebrows rose, and that smile hovered on his mouth.

Definitely ouch. Heat crept up her throat and spread across her cheeks. Caught, like a teenager ogling the teacher as he wrote on the board. ‘Nothing.’ Glancing around, she hurried to find something neutral to talk about. ‘You’ve got a lovely home. Spacious and light, warm and cosy.’
Home and Garden
reporter she was not. ‘Been here long?’

‘Two and a half years. I was looking for a less hectic work schedule. On a holiday at the family farm out in the sounds, someone mentioned Havelock needed a GP. So here we are.’

‘Is there enough work for a full-time doctor?’ The town was less than small.

‘I do mornings here four days a week and the rest of my time in Blenheim at the practice this one’s linked to.’

‘How do you manage? A GP’s life is never quiet. Then there are your kids.’

‘Solo parenting is a balancing act but I wouldn’t swap it for anything.’ He sprinkled oil onto the steaks and reached for the pepper grinder.

As she watched those strong hands twisting the utensil, her stomach did a wee shake. Long, strong fingers. It didn’t take any effort to imagine them tripping over her skin. Her cheeks burned like a furnace. In fact, her whole body had come alive.

‘Did I knock my head when I fell yesterday?’

Instantly Cam was wiping his hands and coming towards her. ‘Have you got a headache?’ There was nothing but concern on his face, bringing her up short as he stared into her eyes. Looking for signs of concussion?

Abruptly shaking her head to break that searching look—who knew what he’d see in there?—she curled in on herself and muttered, ‘Sorry. Not a headache.’ Though one was beginning to tap behind her eyes. ‘I didn’t mean to say that out loud.’

That concern didn’t lift. ‘I think you’re a dab hand at downplaying situations. So, do you have a headache or not?’

‘No. Promise.’ Just a dose of reawakened hormones. No problem. They’d soon get tired of not being let out to play and go back to their cave. But Cam wasn’t moving away so some explanation was apparently expected. Like what? Where were the twins when she needed their boisterous exuberance? ‘Promise,’ she reiterated, and tried for nonchalance as she lifted the glass of water. For the life of her she couldn’t think of anything to say that wouldn’t have him packing her back into that four-wheel drive of his and delivering her to that backpackers’ lodge up the road.

Finally he moved away, returned to his bench and dinner preparations. ‘You didn’t mention hitting your head yesterday, neither did you show any signs of a bang on the skull when I checked you out.’

‘As I thought.’ Sipping the refreshing water, she stared into the bottom of the glass. When was the last time she’d held a man, or been held in strong male arms? When was the last time she’d shared a kiss? Months ago, weeks before she and Colby had split.

Colby. A man driven by his background of poverty, he didn’t know when to stop and enjoy what he’d achieved. He’d always wanted more, and had expected her to be into all that, too. When she’d mentioned that one day she hoped to have a family, he’d regarded her as if he didn’t know her at all. Maybe he hadn’t known who she’d become. Face it, she struggled to recognise herself sometimes. The one definite to come from losing Alison was that she wanted children. But first she had to find a man with the same beliefs and objectives. An image of a firm butt in fitting trousers flicked into her mind.

There hadn’t been a man, any man, since Colby. Hadn’t been the need. During her grand tour of places she and Alison had been it had left little energy or inclination for sex and romance. Anyway, sex with strangers so wasn’t her thing, and she hadn’t stopped anywhere long enough to get to know anyone. Until now. Again an image of Cam floated across her mind, this time a smiling, helpful Cam.

She jerked upright in the chair. Something cold and wet trickled over her stomach. The glass in her hand was empty. ‘Did I nod off?’

‘You did.’ A large hand removed the glass. ‘Want a replacement?’ Cam asked, a hint of amusement in his voice.

Who could blame him? The guy already had two kids to mind, he didn’t need a delinquent adult as well. ‘No, thanks.’

‘Dad, we’re hungry.’

‘Now, there’s surprise. Go and wash your hands, then set the table on the deck.’

‘Is Jenny coming outside with us?’

Cam raised one eyebrow. ‘I can bring your dinner in here if you like.’

‘I don’t think so.’ She made to push up from the armchair and there was a steadying hand on her elbow. ‘I’ll join you out there.’

‘Easy.’ Cam handed her the blasted crutches.

‘I could’ve hopped,’ she growled, as she tucked the poles under her armpits and tried to balance without tipping over into a heap.

‘You could have, and it would’ve hurt.’ That was such a doctor tone.

She tried glaring at him. ‘You have all the answers, don’t you?’ Then a smile broke over her mouth. It was impossible to be mad at him when he was being so kind and downright appealing.

‘You’d better believe it.’ Finally, those lips lifted into a return smile.

This time, thankfully, those hormones stayed in their cave. But warmth trickled through her. When Cam smiled it was like a light in a blackout. Even though he didn’t do full-blown, face-crinkling smiles, what he did give was rare and special, making her feel special. Which, of course, she wasn’t. Not to Cam anyway.

She headed for the deck, carefully manoeuvring around furniture. No way was she tipping onto her face and giving him more to deal with.

* * *

‘Goodnight, you two. No talking once the light’s out.’ As if they’d take the slightest bit of notice. Cam tried to pull on a serious face but how could he when Marcus and Andrew looked so darned cute—make that cool—lying in their beds pretending to be ready for sleep. He knew the moment he closed the bedroom door they’d roll over to face each other and yack their heads off for as long as he pretended not to know.

‘Goodnight, Dad.’ They both giggled.

How could Margaret have left them? He still couldn’t get his head around that. Leave him? Yes, fine, if that was what she wanted. That particular pain had finally begun ebbing away. Shame the distrust couldn’t do the same. But these guys deserved so much better from their mother. Bile rose in his throat.

It had been as if the bond that mothers presumably had from the moment they knew they were carrying a child had been missing in Margaret. Sure, the pregnancy had been unplanned. He should’ve seen the warning signs then. While he’d been ecstatic, she’d been upset. Unfortunately his belief that she’d get past that and fall in love with her babies when she held them for the first time hadn’t eventuated. Instead, she’d focused more and more on her career until finally that had attracted her more than her children or her husband.

‘Goodnight, Dad,’ Marcus repeated. ‘We want to go to sleep,’ the little imp added, with eyes wide and the sheet already half off his skinny body.

‘Dad?’ Andrew sounded worried.

Three strides and he stood between the beds. Bending down, he scooped first Marcus then Andrew into his arms for a family hug. The scent of small boys filtered up his nose, warming him deep inside. ‘I love you guys so much,’ he whispered around the lump suddenly clogging his throat. How long since he’d last told them? These days he did more telling off than offering endearments. Something he really needed to work on.

Wriggle, wriggle. The boys slipped down and climbed back into bed. ‘We love you, too.’

‘Do you think Jenny’s got anyone to love her?’ asked Andrew.

Not if that desolation that tripped into her eyes at unexpected moments was anything to go by. ‘I’m sure she has,’ he lied. ‘But it’s not something you can ask her.’

‘Why not?’ The inevitable question hung between them all.

How to shut this down without upsetting the boys? ‘When you don’t know someone very well you can’t ask a question like that. It’s personal.’
That goes for you, too, Cam.
As Andrew’s mouth opened Cam held up his hand. ‘Wait. You don’t want to make Jenny unhappy, and asking who loves her might make her very sad if there isn’t anyone special.’

‘We make her happy. She laughs with us.’

‘You’re right. She does that a lot when she’s with you.’ But not as much with him. Which might be a good thing. Too much laughter between them might lead to complications neither of them needed. He had his life mapped out: get these two through to adulthood as unscathed as possible. That meant focusing entirely on their needs and not his own.

Huh? What needs do I have anyway? I have food, warmth, shelter. I’ve a job that provides all those and helps towards keeping me sane. I’m the father of the greatest, coolest, funniest two kids ever born. It would be greedy to want more.

But when he stepped into the lounge and spied Jenny in the big old rocking chair Grandma had left him, the question repeated in his head.
Do I have other needs?
Loneliness surfaced, knocking the breath from his lungs. Strange because he was usually surrounded by people. But when was the last time he’d told anyone his dreams? Or made plans to go on a holiday with another adult to share everything with?

At the moment there was no one around to discuss decisions with about what to buy the boys for Christmas, or whether to apply for a partnership in the medical centre. Cam grimaced. Some people would tell him he was lucky not having to take on board another person’s ideas.

Glancing at Jenny, he wondered what it was about her that stirred up these pointless emotions and questions. Her chin rested on her gently rising and falling sternum, her eyes were firmly shut, those long, slim hands lying in her lap: the picture of abandonment. She’d finally succumbed to the exhaustion plaguing her all evening, which she’d been fighting with the tenacity of a bull terrier.

The sound of a small snore reached him. He grinned. She even sounded like a bull terrier. Kind of cute.

Smack. His palm banged his forehead. Cute? His boys were cute. Not this woman, who’d be gone within a day or two.

He might know next to nothing about Jenny Bostosk, but only a blind man wouldn’t see that she moved on all the time. It was there in her eyes as they roved the horizon, in her short, sharp movements as if her body couldn’t handle staying in one place for very long.

Which was just as well. Despite inviting Jenny into his home, he was not getting involved. It had taken a long time to get over Margaret dumping him. Even now he could feel the disbelief that had slammed through him when she’d announced she was leaving him and the boys. So, no, cute as Jenny was, he wasn’t getting involved.

As his eyes scoped over her it dawned on him that at this very moment she was completely, and unusually, still. Her mind had obviously closed up shop for the night. Bet that didn’t happen often.

Jenny needed to be in bed, not scrunched up in a chair. He headed for the bedroom he’d made hers for now and folded back the covers on the bed, closed the curtains and turned on the bedside light. Returning to the living area, he drew a deep, steadying breath and bent down to slide his arms under her. Straightening his back, he lifted her warm body and headed for the bedroom as fast as possible without disturbing her. Having an antsy woman wake up in this situation would probably get his head beaten in.