A Family This Christmas (8 page)

Cam refilled her wine glass, even though she’d barely touched it. ‘Here, enjoy that.’ He handed it over. ‘Marcus, Andrew, let’s give Jenny a break now. Dinner will be ready soon so how about you empty your schoolbags and put the lunchboxes on the bench?’

‘Thanks.’ Jenny watched them scurry to do what they’d been asked. ‘Not sure where in the kitchen they can put anything. I did spread out a bit.’

‘A bit?’ Cam choked on his wine. She patted his back hard until he held a hand up and drew a deep breath. ‘If I didn’t know better I’d say a tornado had passed through the kitchen.’

‘You do tend to exaggerate.’ Reluctantly she withdrew her hand, trailing it across his shoulder blade and upper arm. The warmth Cam radiated hit her deep inside. A rare warmth from touching another human being. That joint hug of Cam’s had been the first in a long time.

‘Who? Me?’ His smile was tight, his breathing a little rapid.

Because of her hand on him? Oh, great. Now what had she done? Did he fancy her? More to the point, did she want him to fancy her? ‘Yes, you.’ Now which question was she answering? Total confusion reigned in her head and she looked away.

Cam did that finger under her chin thing and tipped her head up and sideways so she couldn’t avoid looking into his eyes. ‘Thank you for telling the boys your story. I know it’s very different from their mother walking away, but they seem to have picked up on something with you, and being twins that’s helping them.’

‘It must be difficult for you every time they think they’ve seen their mother. Is that what happened on Saturday? One of them said something about seeing her.’

‘You got it in one.’ His hands clenched and his body tensed. ‘Some days I could strangle her for hurting them. All Marcus and Andrew ever asked for was to be loved. What’s so wrong with that?’ Spinning on the balls of his feet, he stared across the lawn, seeing who knew what.

‘How long has she been gone?’ Would he tell her to mind her own business?

‘Two years and five weeks.’ The desolation in his voice rolled her heart. She wanted to wrap her arms around him in a return hug, to take away that misery, but she couldn’t move. What if he rejected her gesture?

Why would he? Why wouldn’t he? They hardly knew each other, despite the fact she’d told him very briefly, via the twins, about Alison—something she never told anyone.

Did he still love his wife? Did he look for her in shops, too? Probably, if that far-away gaze was an indicator. Which meant she had no right feeling anything about him other than that he was a nice guy being very kind to her. Time to move on in case she started feeling something stronger for him. She’d talk about that after dinner when the boys were tucked up in bed. Tomorrow she’d head to a motel in Blenheim.

Dinner. The barbecue had waves of heat coming off it. ‘Cam, I think you need to turn the barbecue off for a while or we’re going to be eating charcoal.’ Clomping inside, she retrieved that vegetable bin he’d taken off her earlier. She’d make the salad before cleaning up the mess she’d created.

It took for ever to wipe down all the surfaces, get that pot looking more or less how it used to, and make a salad.

By the time they’d all eaten and the dishes had been rinsed and stacked in the dishwasher Jenny was ready to take the weight off her foot.

Cam sat at his computer. ‘Monthly health department requirements,’ he muttered over his shoulder in answer to her query about why he was still working.

‘You don’t have an office person to deal with that?’ Filling the kettle, she flicked it on and found the teabags. ‘You want tea?’

‘Please. We do have office staff but the partners insist all of us check the figures pertaining to our own work. Pain in the backside at times.’ Cam leaned closer to the screen. ‘Especially when my receptionist never makes mistakes.’

‘You’ll have to come and get your tea. I’m done with cleaning up my messes,’ she quipped, as she placed a plate of chocolate-chip cookies by his mug, ‘I’d have baked a cake but you’re out of flour.’

‘You got these at the bakery.’

‘Hope you like them.’

‘They’re the best. Don’t tell the boys you bought some or they’ll be gone.’

Guilt flared for leaving them out of the treat. ‘Should I have given them one before they went to bed?’

‘No. They’ll probably get some on Friday when they buy their lunch.’

‘You’re not averse to a treat, then?’

Cam smiled, a big, happy smile. ‘Who is?’

She could fall for that smile. So rare but when he tried it was beautiful. Which brought her to the next subject. ‘I’m thinking I should be moving on soon. Saturday, maybe.’ Huh? What had happened to going tomorrow? Saturday had slipped out so easily. She was finding it harder by the day to go. Cam had sucked her in, wrapped her in kindness, and made her start looking at the world differently. That was almost addictive.

Cam leant back in his chair and stared at her. ‘Moving on? To where? Not to mention how. You can’t drive yet.’

‘I don’t want to overstay my welcome.’
Lame, Jenny, very lame.

‘I’ll let you know when you have.’ That smile had well and truly disappeared now, making her sad.

‘Now, why doesn’t that surprise me?’ She tried for a light-hearted tone. Big fail. ‘Seriously, Cam, you’ve done more than enough for me. Think about what you said regarding the twins and them connecting with me. Wouldn’t it be better for me to go now, before it becomes a problem?’

Where had that come from? She hadn’t consciously thought it through, but now that the idea was out there she knew it to be true. ‘No way do I want to upset Andrew and Marcus.’

‘Low blow, Jenny Bostock.’ He looked taken aback. Why? She was only trying to take his concerns into consideration.

‘It wasn’t meant to be.’
I don’t want to go. Not yet.
But staying would only make her eventual leaving harder for her as much as for the boys. She just knew it. Already Cam featured in her daydreams, and her night-time ones. Even looking at him threw her sex-starved body into a pickle. Considering that sex had never been high on her list of requirements even in the good times, this was hard to understand. Could it be because she’d never met a man as hot as Cam? Just breathing the same air as him turned her on.
Hello? Who am I? I don’t recognise myself.

‘What are you doing for Christmas?’ Cam stretched his long legs further under the table and crossed his ankles.

‘Christmas?’ What did that have to do with anything?

‘You know. The time when Santa Claus comes down the chimney, bringing sacks of presents for everyone.’

She nodded. ‘That Christmas.’ Maybe she should go tonight. Christmas used to be filled with fun and love. She couldn’t imagine sitting down to unwrap those presents or to eat roast turkey and hot ham without Alison. Last year the whole issue had been avoided when Mum and Dad had joined her and Colby at a restaurant on Auckland’s viaduct.

‘It’s not far off. Have you got plans?’

Stop right there, Cameron.

‘Yes, I have, as it happens.’

I’m going to book into a hotel in some place I’ve never visited before and spend the day exploring.

Disappointment gleamed out at her from those all-seeing eyes. An uncomfortable silence settled between them, making her fidgety. Finally, when she couldn’t bear it any more, she said, ‘What are you and the boys doing that day?’ Turn it on him, divert his attention.

‘Going down the Kenepuru Sound to the family beach house with the whole Roberts clan.’

‘You’ve got brothers and sisters?’

‘Three sisters, three brothers-in-law, six nieces and nephews, and my parents. We have a wonderful time.’

She’d got an answer that only caused envy to unfurl deep inside her. Family. Mum and Dad. Back in Dunedin. Christmas would be as lonely for them there as it would be for her in a hotel. She made an instant decision. ‘I’m going down south to see my parents.’

‘Good idea.’ But she noted a hint of disappointment in Cam’s eyes before he turned back to the computer and began tapping on the keyboard.

Dismissed. Fair enough. She hadn’t exactly been forthcoming about her off-the-cuff plans. Taking the blunt hint, she hobbled towards the hallway. ‘Goodnight.’

‘Jenny,’ Cam called softly. ‘Don’t make any definite plan about when you’re leaving. Stay for the weekend and see how you feel next week. The boys would love to have you here for their school swimming competition on Saturday.’

Yeah. But what about Cam? Would he love to have her standing with him as he encouraged his lads to swim faster?

CHAPTER EIGHT

C
AM
FELT
FREER
than he had for months. His boys were happier than they’d been since arriving in Havelock and that was saying something because they enjoyed living in this tiny place where everyone knew everyone—sometimes far too well. The kids were the only reason he’d hung in here, putting them before the aching need to lose himself in a city filled with people and action and work. Yet today there was a lightness in his chest around his heart that had nothing to with Havelock and a lot to do with the woman walking beside him.

‘Hi, Cam,’ Braden greeted him, as he placed his ‘OPEN’ sign outside his tourist info centre. ‘You’re looking pleased with yourself this morning.’

‘Christmas is just around the corner, the sun’s shining and my boys are in the swimming team for this weekend’s contest against Rai Valley School. Can’t get better than that.’

‘Sounds like you’re taking happy pills,’ Jenny muttered.

He laughed. Out loud. A deep belly laugh. What the heck? Maybe he had swallowed something he shouldn’t have. Braden probably wore a shocked look on his face after that spewing of words he’d given. He shrugged. Tough. ‘I’d better get that bottle of multivitamins checked out. Who knows what’s in them?’

‘Maybe you need to see a doctor.’ Jenny shook her head at him. ‘I know of one who thinks you’re decidedly off your rocker. Braden’s still scratching his head and staring at you as though he doesn’t know you any more.’

‘Does that doctor accept responsibility for my deterioration?’

Those gorgeous green eyes widened, and laughter crinkles appeared at their corners. ‘You’re blaming me for your suddenly apparent motor-mouth?’

‘Of course I am.’ Not only that. He blamed her for the hours he lay awake at night, wishing she was lying naked in his bed with her legs entwined with his and his hands on those beautiful mounds pushing out the front of her skimpy top.

‘Great.’

‘Boys, watch where you’re going,’ he said automatically, before taking Jenny’s elbow to lead her across the road after a truck and trailer unit loaded with pine logs rolled past.

Not that she needed his helping hand, despite having left the crutches at home this morning, but he liked doing it, enjoyed touching her. Her skin was smooth and soft under his fingers. The pulse at her elbow rapped a beat on his fingertip and heated his blood fast. Resisting the urge to drop her elbow or the other one to hold on tighter, he just enjoyed the moment, and ignored the sudden intake of breath she made.

The other side of the road came all too quickly, giving him no excuse to continue holding her. But Jenny was ahead of him, tugging free before he had time to loosen his fingers. She stepped sideways, putting a gap between them. Not happy with him? He tried to read her expression, found he couldn’t. She didn’t appear to be angry. Good, because he really didn’t want them getting offside. ‘What are you going to do today?’

She flicked him a wry smile. ‘I’ll have a nana nap, wash my bloomers and scrub my dentures.’

No mention of attempting to cook dinner again. Phew. ‘That exciting, huh?’ If she was joking with him he had to be in her good books. So taking her elbow hadn’t been a bad thing. Did that mean he’d sparked some heat in her as she had done in him?
I hope so. Oh, boy, as I’ve told myself before, I’m in trouble.
‘Don’t nana nap through three o’clock and miss meeting the boys at school.’

‘Maybe I’ll wait outside the gate all day so I’ll be sure to be there on time. Where do they get all that energy?’

The boys had raced ahead, joining other kids on their way to school. ‘No idea, but I could do with some of it.’ Yet today there was a spring in his step as he tracked the daily route to the medical centre. Until now Havelock had been little more than an anchor around his neck. Today he found himself looking around, smiling at people, watching Jenny as she hobbled along the uneven path, enjoying the twins’ enthusiasm for school. Today he actually liked Havelock: liked that he lived here, was making a life for himself and the kids here. Liked walking to work with this woman.

A family. That’s what this felt like. Family. How he’d always hoped it would be with Margaret. He shivered, looked up to see if the sun had gone behind a cloud. Nope, not a cloud anywhere to be seen. The ghost had been his dreams and aspirations. Margaret had doused all of those.

Yet here he’d been feeling warm and fuzzy about a family when the woman who’d triggered this was all but a stranger to him. More than crazy, considering his ex hated this ridiculously small place that she believed no one had heard of. No one that counted anyway. Jenny was used to big hospitals and people in her face all the time so it was given that she was unlikely to feel comfortable in Havelock. He needed to remember that next time his hormones woke up.

‘See ya, Dad.’ Andrew flapped a hand in his direction.

Blink. Oh, right. His corner. ‘Wait,’ he called to the boys. ‘The medical centre’s up this street,’ he told Jenny. ‘I appreciate you doing this. It’s one of the things that I worry about: Andrew and Marcus having to go to Amanda’s and not being able to come straight home from school. But there’s no other way around the problem.’

‘The pleasure’s all mine.’ She sounded so sincere his heart melted a weeny bit more.

Note to self:
don’t feel bad when Jenny finally leaves. Enjoy the time she’s here with us.

* * *

Jenny clomped along to the school gate a few minutes before three. It was Thursday and she wasn’t at all ready to leave. In fact, she was getting far too comfortable in the Roberts household. It felt like home. Maybe come Monday she’d feel differently. The weekend was bound to be hectic and crazy.

Standing close to but not in the midst of the parents waiting for their children, she glanced around and chuckled. This whole pick-up-the-kids-from-school scene had absolutely nothing to do with her previous life. But when the boys had asked if she would and Cam had agreed if Jenny was happy with the idea, she hadn’t been able to come up with any reason why not.

‘Hi, I’m Amanda. The twins usually come to me after school. I’m presuming you’re Jenny, right?’ A woman with bright orange stripes in her black hair stood in front of her.

‘Hello, Amanda. Guess the cast’s a giveaway, huh?’

Amanda grinned. ‘The twins talk nonstop about you. I reckon there’s not much about you I don’t know.’

Absolutely wonderful. So all the town knew she’d lost her mojo and her sister. ‘How boring for you all.’

The grin widened, if that was possible. ‘Relax. The twins think you’re pretty, and cool for reading to them, and apparently you’re hopeless at cooking. Sometimes I wish I couldn’t put a meal together then someone else would have to feed my tribe.’

‘There is that. But you wouldn’t believe the mess I made of dinner and the kitchen the other night. No wonder the boys were talking about me.’

‘I heard dinner went in the bin untouched.’

So it was true what people said—there were no secrets in small towns. A piercing ringing sound came from inside the school grounds. Saved by the bell. Now all she had to do was wait for Marcus and Andrew to find her and then they could go home—where she could make some more blunders to amuse everyone.

Amanda said, ‘Why don’t you come and have a coffee with me tomorrow morning? I do a mean cappuccino, even if I say so myself.’

About to say no, Jenny glanced at this woman who had been kind enough to speak to her. There was nothing but friendship in her eyes. ‘I’d like that.’

Yeah, actually, she would. It had been a long time since she’d met a friend for coffee, and while she and Amanda weren’t strictly friends it would be nice all the same. Another tick for Havelock. This small place had started doing what nowhere else had managed so far. It had begun chipping away her armour plating that kept the world out and her pain in.

As Amanda gave her the address children swarmed out the gate to surround the waiting parents, the noise level getting higher by the second.

‘Jenny, we’re hungry.’

At least that’s what she thought Marcus said, but who’d know in the bedlam? He could’ve told her he’d lost his school bag or his lunch had been stolen, she wouldn’t have a clue. ‘Just as well I brought my wallet, then, isn’t it? We can stop at the bakery on the way home.’

‘Can we really?’ Andrew bounced up in front of her.

‘Better than me making you some biscuits.’ She grinned.

Andrew nodded solemnly. ‘Would they look like that chicken thing you threw out?’

‘Probably.’ What happened to the Jenny who hated to fail at anything? The Jenny who didn’t do cooking so that no one could laugh at her messes? She’d come to Havelock, that’s what.

The boys talked nonstop until they reached the bakery, where they had an endless debate about which treat they’d like. Finally Jenny chose a custard square for herself, saying, ‘You’ve got until the lady gives me my cake to make up your minds, otherwise you’re going without.’

Funny how quickly they decided on the brownie. ‘Thanks, Jenny.’

‘What’s for dinner?’ Andrew asked, less than a minute later.

‘We’ll have to wait and see,’ she told them. ‘You haven’t eaten your brownie yet.’

Marcus rolled his eyes at his brother. ‘It’s Thursday. Sausage night.’

What? ‘You have the same thing on the same night? All the time?’

‘Of course.’

Probably the only way Cam coped. He was a thoroughly organised man about the house. Already she’d come to recognise his routines for getting the dinner on, the house tidied, the boys showered and their homework under way.

‘Hope you don’t mind the meals we have here,’ Cam said later that night, as he pulled a packet of mince from the freezer.

‘Meat patties tomorrow night, then?’

‘You’ve worked it out already?’ Cam’s smile was wary. ‘I do vary the menu occasionally. It’s also different from summer to winter. I make mostly casseroles in the colder months, which are great for being able to slow-cook in the crockpot all day.’

‘You’re very well organised.’ Her routine used to involve going to the supermarket every day after work, where there were all manner and number of solutions for meals and drinks.

‘You avoided my original question.’

Handing Cam his mug of tea, she laughed. ‘Relax. I’m hardly going to complain, am I? You might tell me to get my own dinner and that would be a disaster.’

‘You’ve
never
cooked?’ He did look a little bamboozled by the thought of that.

‘You’re asking because I’m female and all good women are goddesses in the kitchen?’ Her hair swirled around her face as she shook her head. ‘Not me. Why bother learning when supermarkets shelves are filled with so many options for heat-and-eat meals? They mightn’t be gourmet but compared to what I create they’re delicious.’

Heat slipped up his neck and into his cheeks. ‘I didn’t mean to be all gung-ho over whose role is whose in the house. I enjoy cooking, especially when I’m not rushing around like a lunatic, trying to get everything done so I can get to bed before midnight.’ He shrugged. ‘There’s something special about putting together a meal to share with family or friends. For me it’s a way of showing I care.’ Another shrug. ‘Even if I only barbecue some sausages.’

She hadn’t thought of it that way. Sharing with family or friends. She used to share flowers from her garden. That had always made her feel good and hopefully it had done the same for the people she’d given them to. ‘I can see how that might be. Except I’d probably lose any friends I might have. Can you imagine sitting down to eat that chicken chasseur I somehow managed to destroy?’

His nose wrinkled and his mouth curved ever so slightly upwards. ‘Truthfully? No. It had a distinctly unappealing look to it. Cooking rule number one: remember that people eat with their eyes before they pick up their knife and fork.’

Rule one, eh? ‘So it’s all about presentation.’

‘Yep. You can fool people quite a lot if the plate looks appetising.’

* * *

The next morning Jenny swung into Amanda’s large kitchen and stopped to gape at the array of cookery books on the shelves. ‘You must have hundreds of books.’

‘I should really go through them and toss the older ones out but I can’t bring myself to do it.’ Amanda jammed her hands on her hips as she joined Jenny in staring at the collection. ‘So many recipes and no time to read them, let alone use them.’

‘Does everyone in Havelock like cooking?’ The bakery was beyond excellent; Cam wasn’t adverse to putting a meal together; and now this. From a wooden rail above the central island gleaming pots and pans hung off hooks within easy reach of anyone working at the bench. ‘Unbelievable.’

‘I used to be a chef before I had four kids and took on teaching swimming.’ Behind the orange and black hair was obviously a very smart brain.

‘You wouldn’t go back into a kitchen here in Havelock?’

As the nostril-twitching aroma of good coffee filled the kitchen, Amanda crossed to a cupboard and found some cups. ‘No. It would take most of my time and I far prefer being here for the children. They’re growing up so fast already that they’ll be gone out into the big, wide world before I know it, and to have wasted these years in a commercial kitchen would be gutting.’

There was a truth in that. Amanda’s focus was family, whereas she didn’t have to think about anyone else. Yet in the past week she’d started to reach out to Mum and Dad with daily emails that were long, wordy ramblings about her stay with the Roberts family. A family that she was trying to help in any little way she could, even if Cam ran such an organised household that there was little she actually did that made any difference.

‘Amanda...’ Jenny paused. Was she about to ask something impossible? Not to mention stupid? ‘Would you show me how to cook a couple of simple meals that I could prepare for Cam and the boys? I’ll pay for everything. If you have the time, of course.’

The woman didn’t even hesitate. Not so bright in that orange head after all? ‘That would be fun. When do you want to start?’

Oh. Um. Next week? But what if she’d gone by then? ‘Today?’