A History of the African-American People (Proposed) by Strom Thurmond (8 page)

As for Wilkes, I’d take what he sends you and try to deal with it as seems best to you, asking him as few questions as possible. In fact, I’d try to ask no questions. He’s prickly. He asked if I was fond of hunting and once signed himself “Button.” I’d not fall too deeply into the personal with him, if I were you, except as regards mothers. Remember the Glen Close character in “Fatal Attraction.”

We appreciate your work on this, Percival, and hope you find it challenging and, possibly, instructive. I look forward to meeting you and your assistant and talking about things. If you want to write up the Mother issue and run it by me first, that’d be fine.

S
IMON
& S
CHUSTER
, I
NC
.
1230 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY 10020

September 11, 2002

Dear Barton,

I enclose the contact information on Mr. Everett and also, should you need it, on Mr. Kincaid, Everett’s scholar-assistant. They are both eagerly awaiting any preliminary discussion you wish to undertake or, failing that, material on the History itself.

Here’s wishing you a productive and mutually rewarding relationship. We much look forward to seeing the completed manuscript.

Yours truly,
Martin

Memo: Snell to McCloud

September 11, 2002

McCloud:

I dare you to say you’re overworked.

In fact, Vendetti—you know him, the depraved Italian guy? I guess he’s Italian, though I wouldn’t want to stereotype, just because he’s fat, dark, inarticulate, and mean. I don’t even know what his title is, but he acts like he’s a made man on the way up that old Mafia ladder. Everybody but me just about dislocates their knees getting down to kiss his ass.

This Vendetti comes up to me and says, “Hey, Snell. That assistant of yours, the one with the funny name, Julep or something, you know who I mean?” “What of it?” I said. “Here’s what of it,” he said; “he have any time on his hands? Cause I got about 30 projects I need some help on and I figure he couldn’t be any too busy.” “Why’d you figure that?” I said. “I just figured,” he said. “Well, you figured wrong, Vendetti,” I said, adding, “And if you think you can figure that way about me, you got the wrong boy, that’s about all that is!”

That put the swarthy prick in his place.

I protected you and now need to keep you busier, having said you were busy. Besides, I am getting a very uneasy feeling about Wilkes, not about the project but about Wilkes personally. You have that feeling too? It doesn’t matter, since I have it.

Here’s what you do. You try to insinuate yourself into Wilkes’s personal life and find out what’s what. I don’t mean to get too personal or anything, nothing illegal. Just try to find out if he’s a square dealer, on the up and up. Just to be perfectly clear, it’s not his sex life I’m curious about. No, it’s his sanity. Of course one may be entwined with the other, in which case, of course, you should collapse that distinction, using due discretion and making it clear at all times that you are acting on your own and not on behalf of the firm.

So, see if you can get a chummy correspondence going. Ask him about his mother and about hunting, two of his interests. Perhaps he will invite you there. In which case, go. Don’t invite him here, though. I don’t want him in the same zipcode with me.

The company picnic is next Saturday, you know. Lots of the fun comes from the paired-up games, like the three-legged race, the human wheelbarrow race, the swimming game called “wedgie your buddy,” and that elaborate cosmetic and clothing game, where partners dress one another in whimsical costumes and give mutual make-overs.

It is customary for the pairings to be arranged ahead of time.

Mart

O
FFICE OF
S
ENATOR
S
TROM
T
HURMOND
217 R
USSELL
S
ENATE
B
UILDING
W
ASHINGTON
, D.C. 20515

September 12, 2002

Juniper:

Well, as for tone, do you know Lewis Carroll? There’s tone for you. Or Nabokov. But why am I telling this to a bonafide English major from NYU, a credential you have now waved before me twice. At one point, the White Queen says to pretty Alice, “I’ve seen hills compared to which that [hill] would be a valley.” If you think my tone is complex, which it is, be glad you aren’t corresponding with the White Queen. Or Humbert.

I see that by citing Lewis Carroll and Humbert I have laid myself open to the suspicion that I may share their proclivities. Well, put that in your toner, Mr. McCloud, and see what your printer delivers!

The project is about to roll, though between you and me, we (which includes the Senator as well as yours truly) need first to test these boys we have assisting.

You ever heard of either of them, these writer-scholars? Your sweetmeat Snell, the one with the extremely peculiar mother—warped him, obviously, the mother did—picked them. You met Snell’s mother? I’d love a description.

Tell me something about yourself. I feel that I am the only one being forthcoming.

And while I’m at it, perhaps I should just up and say to you, “Certainly, if you do not trust me enough to tell me your name, why should you? I’ve never been one to beg for trust. Never had to. So your given name shall be a secret known only to you, the phone company, the janitor in your building, and your whores.”

Tony (get it?)

Rupert? Rik? Rodan?

S
IMON
& S
CHUSTER
, I
NC
.
1230 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY 10020

September 12, 2002

Professor James Kincaid

English Department

University of Southern California

Los Angeles, CA 90089-0354

Dear Mr. Kincaid,

I see that I have neglected to contact you about the Thurmond project and describe our terms. I realize that you know of this project through Percival Everett and that he will assign you your duties. Whatever you work out is fine with us. It is what we call a “subsidiary arrangement,” that which you and Everett have. We are not legally obliged, as I understand it.

We offer you a flat fee of $750 (seven hundred and fifty dollars) for such duties as Mr. Everett assigns, contingent on his approval of such work. The enclosed contract spells all this out clearly.

We look forward to your participation in this project, for which we have the highest hopes.

Sincerely,

Martin A. Snell

Martin A. Snell

Senior Editor

Snell, I just saw the correspondence on the Thurmond project.

The oddities therein are multitudinous.

I know you spoke eloquently, or at least heatedly, in support of this book. You failed to mention a few things: the absence of any evidence to suggest that Thurmond is writing this or any other book, is even aware of this project; the manifest lunacy of this Wilks character; the obscurity of the ghost-writing team. And what the fuck is this project anyway? I know you asked that question of Wilks yourself, but to have offered a contract before settling it seems to me—well, curious.

We’re saddled with this now. By “we” I mean “you.” If this fizzles or, worse, explodes, be sure that your first major push here will be your last.

Meanwhile, let me know how I can help.

James R. Kincaid
University of Southern California
University Park Campus
Los Angeles, CA 90089

September 17, 2002

Mr. Martin A. Snell

Senior Editor

Simon & Schuster

Dear Mr. Snell,

I have shown your letter and what you choose to call a “contract” to Percival Everett; and believe you me, we have had quite a laugh over it. I don’t blame you, as I suppose you simply don’t know who I am, but the idea of me working for $750 (which is worth about 10 minutes of my time) or assisting Percival Everett! My jaw drops. It’s not that Percival isn’t a fine person and writer, wholly deserving of an assistant, a whole damned army of assistants. But to think I would be ready to play that particular role. Really, Mr. Snell, you are droll.