A Life Unplanned (9 page)

Chapter 10 – On Relationships, Good and Bad

When we arrived at Maylene's, we could hear our mothers chatting away and giggling in the kitchen. "Oh, yes, we can drape the pink material over the archway," Maylene said.

"Do you think he's made a pass at her yet?" my mother asked Maylene.

"I don't think so. I hope he does soon. I know he's worried about spooking her. If he does, all this planning will be for naught."

I looked up at Trent, and he was blushing a deep red. "You don't want to make a pass at me, do you?" I asked skeptically.

He turned even redder.

"That's what I thought. I knew you weren't really interested in me," I said in a steady voice. I didn't think I was disappointed, but it sure felt like it. "You should set them straight," I said pointing to the kitchen, where our scheming mothers were planning something.

I went to step away from him and go lay down in my room, but he grabbed my arm. "My mom is right," he said anxiously, clearing his throat.

"What?"

He looked nervous and frustrated. "I don't want to spook you."

"Spook me?"

"My kids are the most important thing in my life right now…and…and I'd like for you to be important, too. You are, already…I mean…as their mother. You're a very important person, Clara, and I…I…"

I let out a sigh. "You don't have to be involved with me to see the kids, Trent. You've worn me down enough with your saintly charm."

"Saintly?"

I laughed at his baffled look. "Please, the old ladies thought you were a priest, and you fussed over me all day, looking after me."

"I…um…"

"I'm going to go put my feet up for a while."

"Are they swelling? Are you feeling okay?" he asked looking down at my feet worried.

"I'm fine, and you just proved my point."

"OH! That should definitely do it!" my mother squealed in the other room.

"You really should take care of that," I said pointing in their general direction. As soon as he turned his head, I snuck off.

I had just made it to my room in his mother's house, when Trent rushed in. His face was flushed, and his eyes looked wild.

"Clara," he breathed, his chest heaving.

"What is it?" I asked worried.

He was back to being frustrated and tongue-tied.

"Trent?" I wasn't sure what he was doing in my room.

When I said his name, his eyes met mine, and a determined look crossed his face. "Fuck it," he said and grabbed me. He wrapped his arms around me and pressed his lips to mine. He kissed me deeply and passionately, and the hussy in me moaned and dug her fingers into his hair. I was in so much trouble.

We kept kissing, barely parting to breathe in between kisses. It felt like I'd been starving for him. The only thing that slowed me was my sore feet. I shifted my stance, not wanting to stop, not wanting to pull out of his arms, but after the fourth shift, he noticed. Of course he noticed. This new Trent was attentive and sweet and quickly picked up on my discomfort.

He pulled back slowly and cupped my face, smiling. "Let's get your feet up." He helped me onto the bed, and like the saint he was, he took off my shoes for me and started rubbing my feet. I moaned loudly. Any passerby would think he was fucking me hard if they overheard it. In fact, that was exactly what happened. Both our mothers poked their heads in the door. But their giddy grins fell, when they saw we were both fully dressed, and the only touching going on was a foot rub.

"Was there something you needed?" I asked Maylene and my mom, letting them know I knew they were there.

"No, we just wanted to check to make sure you were alright. Is there anything you need while we're up here?" Maylene asked.

"No, we're good, thank you," Trent said dismissively.

I snorted at his blatant disregard of their presence. Both our mothers looked a little shamed and left, shutting the door behind themselves.

Trent got up and locked it. I sat up nervously on the bed, not sure what he was doing. He climbed on the bed next to me, and I felt like an idiot. I had given in to kissing him like a slut, and now he probably expected me to put out…again. There was no reason for him to believe that I'd say no. I'd acted like a whore with him before.

"Trent, I'm not ready to…"

"I just want to talk, Clara," he said, sitting back against the headboard of the bed. "Do you regret kissing me back?" he asked worried.

I shrugged. "I don't think so."

He gave me a small smile. "Would you be open to doing it again sometime?"

I shrugged again, feeling like an idiot. "I know you probably think I'm easy, because of the way I've behaved in the past, but I'm not really a floosy. I don't sleep around with people, and definitely not strangers. You're the only exception I've ever made."

He nodded like he heard me, but I wasn't sure he actually believed me. He fluffed a pillow closer to him and patted the bed. "Come over here."

I looked at him hesitantly.

"I'd like to get to know you better and maybe have you get to know me a little better, too."

I sat up against the headboard, but didn't move closer to him. I had a feeling if I got too close to him, I'd end up under him, and it wouldn't have necessarily been all his doing. I eyed him, wondering if he had really changed at all, or if he was a wolf in sheep's clothing. The best way to find out the truth would be to talk to him. "Why were you a jerk in college? I get why you were one recently, but you were horrible in school. That was before the women had come after you."

He frowned down at his hands, and I crossed my arms across my chest, letting him know with my body language that I wasn't giving up. I doubted he could come up with any sort of excuse or explanation.

"Well?" I pushed.

He rubbed his face and looked to be in pain. "There really is no excuse for my behavior."

"Obviously. I just don't understand how you could've behaved like that with Maylene as your mom."

He got up off the bed, and I relaxed a little more. I could tell he was trying to think of something to say to me.

"My mother is different…old-fashioned. I had a few bad experiences with girls…the kind that made me believe women like my mother didn't exist anymore, and so they didn't deserve respect."

"How on earth could you make such a stupid assumption?"

He slouched in the vanity chair across the room. "I told you, there was no excuse for my behavior, and then I fell into the habit of mistreating women."

"But why did it start in the first place?" I was getting a little frustrated with him.

"We're all originally from Boston. That's where I grew up, that was where I went to school, and I had a scholarship to go to college there."

Now I was confused.

"We had to leave, because of a girl, a few of them, really. I've never had good luck with women. I seem to attract bad ones."

I tried not to take his words personally.

"I took advantage of it in college. I hadn't in high school. I wasn't like that. I had one steady girlfriend from eighth grade to eleventh."

"What happened?"

"My best friend got her pregnant."

I gasped, shocked.

"Yeah, at the time, I didn't know if I should be relieved or pissed, when she confessed the baby wasn't mine. Everything was so messed up after that, and things just seemed to get worse. I had a friend who was a girl. I'd known her since second grade. We weren't really close, but after she heard about what happened, she made her move. I know that's what it was now. It didn't take her long to swoop in and play my rebound. Again, I was stupid and trusting, and I thought she loved me. I was thinking everything was going to be okay, and I was finally getting over my ex-girlfriend. Then I walked in on Mandy, my new girlfriend, trying to take my dad's pants off."

"WHAT?" I yelled in disbelief.

"My dad had shoved her away and told her to leave. I had sort of overheard parts of their conversation before I came into the room. He was rebuffing her and scolding her, telling her that her behavior was inappropriate. I walked in and yelled at her, pissed and hurt. I couldn't believe she used me to get to my dad. She'd had a crush on him for years."

"I'm so sorry, Trent."

"After her was Sabrina. We couldn't stay in Boston anymore after that. There was too much scandal attached to our family."

"Who was Sabrina?"

"She was my biggest mistake." He took a few deep breaths and then looked up at me determined. "Keep in mind that everything she said was a lie, and there were eyewitnesses who proved my innocence."

"Innocence?"

He rubbed his face and looked so exhausted. "I went to a house party. I wanted to blow off some steam after things went south with Mandy. My ego had taken a major hit. My first love ran off with my best friend, and my second girlfriend had the hots for my dad, not me. I needed some validation." He paused, as if trying to find the right words. "I wasn't really drunk, and neither was she. I don't think she'd actually had anything to drink besides water that night. Sabrina came on to me strong, and I liked it. I needed it. I let her drag me off into another room and…" he closed his eyes and screwed up his face in displeasure. "Thankfully, she forgot to lock the door, and two different couples tried sneaking into our room, only to find her riding me and yelling at them to shut the door, that the room was taken."

I didn't understand what the problem was. He said he wasn't drunk, and he had wanted to be with her.

"A week later, she told me that she was going to tell her parents I raped her if I didn't pay her off. I thought she was fucked in the head and told her no way. I wasn't the first guy she'd been with. Things got bad fast after that. Her parents pressed charges. I was seen as the bad guy. No one believed me at first, but we were finally able to track down the people who’d butted into the room when things were going down. All four of them testified on my behalf, clearing me of the charges, but the damage was done. I lost my scholarship, and some people thought my family had paid the witnesses to lie.

"My parents moved us to Texas to get away from everyone. They went to Livingston, and I went to Waco to school. I swore off girls at first, but after sitting back and watching enough of my buddies play the field, I decided to do the same. I used women and refused to let anyone close to me.

"I wanted validation, proof that I was wanted for more than just my family or parents' money. I took what I wanted and gave nothing in return to boost my own self-esteem, and I hurt so many people while doing it, including myself. I was raised better than that, and my behavior weighs heavily on my conscience even now."

"What made you stop being that way?" I asked.

"By the time we met, I'd already become a resident. As a resident, they move you to different departments, so you can decide if you'd like to specialize in anything. It's also required, so you have a basic knowledge of things and know when to refer your patient to a specialist. It wasn't long after Tiffany, when I was transferred to the mental health ward." He grimaced and covered his face for a moment. "I think that was my hardest rotation. So many fucked up people came through, and so many were women who'd had mental breakdowns because of fuck-ups like me who'd hurt them. I was also given a little more insight as to why the girls from my high school had acted the way they did. Hell, it was obvious to me even back then that Mandy was fucked in the head and had daddy issues. I know my dad is good looking, but he was twenty-eight years older than her. That's just gross."

I laughed at his disgusted face.

"After that, the guilt piled on hard. I knew better, had been raised better, and I couldn't continue with my bad behavior anymore. I never told my parents what I did, but word had gotten back to them on a few different things, even before my move to Livingston. Trevor, my brother, was living in Waco, he knew some of what I was doing and didn't approve. He and my dad sat me down and tried to have a heart-to-heart, but it was too early, my ego was still wounded from the mess in Boston. I didn't think they understood. My brother was happily married, and my dad…even if he’d had nothing to do with Mandy's behavior, I still held it against him at the time.

"After my stint in the mental ward, I asked for a transfer to St. Luke’s in Livingston and went home to my parents. I couldn't face the girls I’d been with. I didn't want to ever see any of them again. It was like there were too many to avoid. Livingston seemed like a good place to hide, and I knew my parents would forgive me. I've been on my best behavior ever since."

"Well, until you met me."

He groaned and climbed back on the bed next to me. "I swear, Clara, I'm not usually like that. I hadn't drunk so much in a couple of years. My body wasn't used to the alcohol, and then the stress of bringing another shit storm down on my family…" he rubbed his face. "I'm sorry I was a jerk that first night in the bar. The second, I really don't have an excuse for myself. I was a little out of it, but I still knew what I was doing. I expected you to slap me, when I made that comment about your tits." He laughed. "You really threw me for a loop. I know why now, sort of. Why don't you tell me the real reason you did what you did that night?"