"I love you," she whispered. "There is nothing of fantasy about that."
"Speak for yourself."
But she couldn't speak. She was too busy arching into his exploring hand. He teased her nipple for long, delicious seconds before smoothing his hand down to her hip and back up again. When she twisted impatiently, his hand returned to her breast, just as she'd wanted it too.
"You know what you want, already,
mon coeur?"
His soft words danced over her.
"I'm precocious."
He put just the right amount of pressure into his teasing, and Marissa groaned her pleasure.
"You certainly are. Soon, I shall have nothing left to teach you." When she arched hard against his hips, Jude gasped. "In fact, I think you're teaching me how to perform as a boy again."
Caught between a laugh and a groan, Marissa rubbed her body more firmly against his, and his shudder filled her with power and lust. He might know more of making love, but she could still make him shake with lust for her. How could she not feel powerful?
Ducking her head down to taste his neck, Marissa did some exploring with her hands as well. His chest and ribs, his hips, so narrow and unyielding compared to hers. Everything about him was a new world. She wanted to know it all.
The muscles of his stomach jerked from her touch like she'd burned him. She knew the feeling. Half her body felt afire already.
Heart pounding, Marissa smoothed her hand down his stomach. She touched the crisp hair that surrounded his sex, and then her fingers brushed his shaft. Again, his body jerked away, but then he settled, his chest still as he held his breath. She held her breath too, and curled her fingers around the thick width.
"You're so hot," she whispered. "Is my hand too cold?"
"No," he bit out.
Marissa smiled and tightened her hold. "Docs it feel good, then?"
"Yes."
"And this?" She stroked him, keeping her hold firm.
"Yes. You... needn't ask again. It's all yes, Marissa."
She chuckled, testing a light hold on him, then tighter. He felt heavy in her hand, and powerful, and Marissa was curious enough to scoot back and push off the bedclothes. She was warm now, after all, and she wanted to see him.
"You will unman me," he groaned, as she watched her hand stroke his cock. She trailed her fingers down to his bullocks as well, then drew her hand up to circle the crown.
Jude groaned and bent to suck her nipple between his teeth. That kiss spiraled through her, tightening her sex and reminding her of where her need was centered. Touching Jude had aroused her to the point that she whimpered and writhed as his teeth scraped her.
She rubbed her leg restlessly against his, needing to draw him near. "Jude," she breathed. My God, she wanted him so badly. What she'd fell in the past had been nothing bill mere curiosity. This was
need.
Jude seemed to realize she was done with her teasing, he kissed her with a pressure that cased her to her back, and then it was his turn to explore. But Jude wasn't touching out of curiosity, he was touching to arouse... and succeeding splendidly. He trailed kisses to her neck, then sucked there as he shaped her hip with his hand. Her impatient squirming seemed a hint he could easily read though, for his hand moved down to her thigh.
When he raised his head, she thought he'd kiss her again, but instead he looked her over. "What's this?" His thumb feathered like a kiss over the top of her thigh. "The cause of so much trouble."
She looked down to see the faint pink mark she'd had since she was born. It looked so harmless and innocent, but the heart-shaped discoloration had caused her to confess so many wicked things.
"I'm honored to finally be amongst such a small band of brothers."
"Hush!" she scolded.
Jude chuckled against her neck and distracted her from her outrage by cupping his hand over the hair between her thighs.
"Oh," she sighed, tilting her hips up in shocked welcome.
"So pretty," he murmured, as his fingers slowly stroked. "So warm and lovely and... slick."
Marissa eased her knees open so that he could do those wonderful things he'd done that night in the gazebo. Yes, she was slick, and she knew what that meant. Slippery sliding and wonderful thrusts.
And Jude didn't disappoint. He stroked her until she was shaking, and then he finally slid one thick finger inside her.
She thought she might scream with the pleasure of it. Maybe she did scream a little, as she dug her heels into the bed and ground her hips against his hand. Jude kissed her hard, and his mouth absorbed her cries of need. It felt so good, his finger working in and out, but she knew what would feel better. She knew what she wanted. But he seemed infuriatingly content to continue his torment.
Just as she reached the peak of desperation, Jude pressed another finger in, and the pressure caught her breath in a stranglehold for a moment.
How much larger would his thick shaft feel? How much more satisfying?
She tore her mouth from his. "Please."
Though his breath quickened against her neck, he didn't respond. If he could ignore her plea, he couldn't possibly be as desperate as she was, but Marissa knew a quick way to rectify that.
Hard as it was to tear her mind from his thrusting hand, Marissa let go of her hold on his arm, and curled her lingers around his cock instead.
His rhythm faltered; his teeth scraped her neck. And when she stroked him slowly from tip to base, Jude gasped, and his whole body thrummed like a taut bow.
That power again, this time tightening around the fingers deep inside her. She was triumphant. And whimpering like a kitten.
And when Jude drew his fingers from her body, she wrapped her arms around his waist to pull him over her. He came willingly, thank God, and when his cock rubbed her sex, she arched into him, moaning as he slid against her.
Oh, God, yes. That was good. So good. And even better when the head notched against her and he eased inside.
"Oh," she whispered, 'Jude," because she wanted her body to know it was him she took inside. Jude, who stretched her sex tight as he slowly sank into her.
He drew out a little, then eased farther in, and Marissa wrapped her arms so tight around him that she could hardly breathe.
"Shh," he murmured. "Relax,
mon coeur."
"I can't!" She was breathing too hard, overwhelmed with all she wanted from him.
"Marissa." His voice dropped. "Marissa." He reached back to tug one of her hands free. Then the other.
He tucked her fisted hands into his and lowered them to the bed. Marissa squeezed her eyes shut and tried to slow her breathing.
"Shh," Jude whispered. He pressed a kiss to one of her eyelids and then the other.
She sobbed and drew her legs high on his. When she wrapped her ankles around him, Jude thrust deep and true, and sank himself fully inside her.
She arched, pushing her head back in stark relief. She was filled with him, just as she'd wanted.
Jude eased slowly out, and when he thrust back in, Marissa opened her eyes to see him above her. He looked fierce and frightening. As fierce as she felt inside her heart as she tightened her fists and tilted her hips up to meet him.
"Breathe, Marissa."
"I can't! I just... I want you so much."
"You have me,
mon coeur.
I'm yours."
"Please," she pled. 'Jude, I..."
He kissed her cheeks, her mouth, her jaw. "Here,
love." Her eyes were still closed when he turned her. Suddenly she was above him, and he was still snug inside her. "Here," he said, "I'm yours."
Marissa drew a deep breath and pushed up on her hands. The weight pushed her body more firmly against him, and she sighed her satisfaction.
He let go of her wrists, and Marissa put her palms to his chest and looked down at Jude. He was gorgeous beneath her. Not pretty, not even handsome, but a gorgeous sight as she raised her hips and then took him deep.
Oh, yes. She could breathe again, though Jude seemed to be having trouble now. His hands gripped her hips as she began to ride him, and his breath came fast and hard.
Marissa felt that power again, the power she held over him, but this time it mixed up with his power over her. He filled her. Pushed inside her. Forced her body to stretch and take him in.
And she loved it. She loved him.
She tried moving faster, then in slow, torturous increments. Jude let her do what she wanted, and it was all as lovely as she'd dreamed. Her thighs began to shake, but she couldn't stop. It wasn't nearly enough. Jude's eyes narrowed, his jaw clenched, and he slid one hand along her thigh until he touched her sex.
"Ah!" she cried out, her hips jerking with the shock of that electric touch.
"That's it," he murmured. "Have me."
She took him harder, as his thumb pressed that spot where all the tension built. "Oh, God. Jude." This was the culmination of every sensation she'd been chasing for years. The wickedness, the tightening, the wild licks of pleasure, the fullness of her very core. This was everything.
The tension became an aching weight that pulled her into herself. Marissa closed her eyes and dropped her head, concentrating on the miracle of her own body. And it was a miracle, the way her pleasure pulled at her soul, becoming something close to pain. She cried out in desperation, and then she broke. Her soul or her body, something inside her broke and released all her joy and pleasure with such force that she screamed as she slammed her hips into Jude's. She needed him impossibly deep, and he must've sensed it, because his hips rose to meet hers with brutal force as she sobbed and shook against him.
When the pleasure finally let go its grip on her, Marissa collapsed to Jude's chest, to pant and shiver against him. His big hands stroked her back as he hummed a soothing sound against the top of her head.
"You're amazing, Marissa."
"I've never . .. I've never felt anything like that."
"Ah. Finally."
"Jude!" she gasped, slapping his arm, but he was laughing against her. When she began to laugh too, his chuckles came to an abrupt stop. She couldn't help but laugh harder, aware of the way her muscles squeezed him.
"Christ, woman."
She rubbed her cheek against the hair of his chest, finding that his skin was damp with sweat. He smelled good and felt even better, pressed damp and hot against her.
She squealed when he flipped her to her hack and surged deeper into her.
"I've told you I need no teasing,
mon coeur.
You're driving me mad."
He
looked
mad, wild-eyed and flushed with passion. Marissa wrapped her legs around his hips and took him as deep as he needed to be. He kissed her with the same hunger she'd felt moments before. And when he finally reached his climax with a last desperate thrust, Marissa felt tears leak from her eyes.
He was her friend and her lover, and he'd be her husband as well.
"I love you," she whispered into the wild mess of his hair.
When he sighed, the weight of his body settled more fully onto her, but it was a happy weight, not one she wanted to squirm away from. He set his forehead to the pillow and shook his head. "I couldn't resist, and now you will regret this."
"I could never regret this. Never."
He pushed up a little, raising his head to look into her eyes. After a moment, weariness settled into his features. "It's too late regardless. I'm yours now."
I'm yours.
The beautiful opposite of what Peter White had said to her.
You're mine now,
he'd crowed, as if she were a purchased treat. The difference, it seemed, between a boy and a man. Just as Jude had promised.
But she could not like the sadness in his eyes. Her vision went blurry. She felt a tear slip free and slide down her temple.
"I should not have given in," Jude sighed.
Marissa hit his shoulder. Hard. She felt his whole body tense against her, and then he rolled free, making her gasp with the strange feeling of him withdrawing from her body.
"Whatever your regrets," he said softly. "We'll marry."
"Those are your regrets, not mine!" she shouted. "I regret nothing. I will wait for you to like me again. I will demand it, do you understand? You will love me someday, damn your stubborn hide."
Jude slowly rose up to his elbow to give him a better vantage point from which to glower down at her.
"Oh, don't look so dark. You're stuck with me now. I will use you until you surrender. You'd do well to make the best of it."
She was about to sit up and reach for the covers, but he stopped her with the gentle brush of his thumb over her cheek. "You're trying to turn my own pleasure against me? Trick me into loving you?"
"You can hardly judge me for the very thing you meant to do. Only
you
are the fickle one it seems. So easily turned away from your affection." Her breath skipped and jumped in her throat as she tried to h-old back more tears. "Don't. . . please don't tell me I'm too late, Jude. I only just realized how much I love you. It isn't
fair."