A Mended Man (The Men of Halfway House Book 4) (7 page)

Aidan reached over and pressed the secondary light switch, illuminating the room with a soft glow.

"How are you holding up?" Hunter asked.

"What are you doing here?" Aidan shook his head. Was he seeing things?
Fuck
. He really did need to get some sleep.

"Cam told me what happened."

"Cam? How did he…" The one question that hadn't made sense at the time.
Did anyone else call?
"That fucking, little, meddling prick—"

"Stop it."

The anger swelled his body and forced him to grit his teeth. "If that little shit put you guys in danger—"

Hunter stepped forward. "I said stop it. Apparently Cole's got a tech friend who set them up to communicate on some anonymous forum or some shit like that. In some weird, twisted, loudmouthed way that kid champions you more than you know and was panicked enough to worry Cam and that's what got me here."

Aidan sighed. "Did Cam come with you?"

"Absolutely not and he's fucking pissed about that."

Aidan took a deep breath. "How the hell did you get here?"

"I assume you saw the marshals outside. Now answer my damn question. How are you holding up?" Hunter asked again.

"Barely," he whispered. No sense lying to his closest friend, he'd see right through whatever bullshit he attempted to dish out.

Hunter pulled him from the back of the neck into an embrace. "I'll stay for a couple of days until I know you're steady."

"You can't. It's not safe."

Hunter pulled back from the embrace, still keeping a firm grip on the back of Aidan's neck. "Then I guess it's a good thing we've got a guard and two marshals outside and two guys in this room who are far more dangerous with their bare hands than the average guy with a weapon. Now stop fighting me on this."

Aidan stepped away, walking over to Jessie's bedside to grip the railing. He screwed his eyes shut and took a few deep breaths, shaking his head. His thoughts were jumbled and the slightest thing kept setting him off. He listened to the rhythmic click and whoosh of the ventilator as it breathed for Jessie, and the steady hum of the oxygen running through the machine. His eyes burned and his throat tightened as the rage bubbled within. The helplessness…the feelings of uselessness, it was too much. Not being able to capture the son of a bitch who did this to Jessie during those critical first forty-eight hours and now, standing here, watching Jessie's bandaged and bruised body with an endotracheal tube in his mouth braced around his head and not being able to do a motherfucking thing to help was just… He gasped a breath, then another, tightening his fists around the bed railing.

"Aidan. Talk to me."

He turned to face his friend and ran his shaky fingers through his hair, unable to voice a single word.

Hunter stood next to Aidan for a few moments, watching him closely. He sighed and retreated to the corner table, grabbing one of the wooden chairs and flipping it around, straddling the back of the seat. "Sit down," he said, pulling the other chair next to him.

Aidan obediently sat. He wasn't sure if it was a brotherly thing, a mentor thing, or a former sergeant thing, but he always listened to his long-time friend.

"We haven't really talked about what happened. I can't imagine what you went through, but shutting everyone out is not the answer."

Aidan sat still, his internal shield fully erect and trying to deflect Hunter's concern about the topic at hand.

"You can't be in a relationship with him and keep this under wraps."

He turned to face his friend and delivered his most serious death glare. "I'm not in a relationship with him."

"But you want to be. Don't deny it."

Aidan turned to Jessie lying motionless on the bed. He wouldn't deny it. He
couldn't
deny it.

"You two… I don't know what the hell it is, but he calms you and gives you some weird balance I hadn't seen in you since before everything happened. You need that. You're too wound up and always on guard, pushing everyone away. And that's going to wear you down." Hunter shook his head and scoffed. "I remember those long nights working on Cam's case. I saw it then, the way you two looked at each other. But I didn't think it would take you guys this long to do something about it."

Aidan's focus snapped back to Hunter. "It's not easy for me."

Hunter rested his chin on his crossed arms lying on the back of the chair. "I know. But shutting everyone out is not the answer. Take it one step at a time and start with him. You need to talk to someone about it."

Aidan frowned. "You know I can't."

"You can't disclose the classified information from the mission, but you can talk about what happened to you so you can work through that. You need to. You're putting up one hell of a front and you're functional. But you keep everyone at a guarded distance and you're sacrificing any chance at happiness because of it."

Aidan let his friend's words sink in. He needed help, even his stubborn mind acknowledged that. He'd somehow managed to survive the series of clusterfucks in his life, but that last epic failure, he couldn't deal with. Shutting down and locking it away was the easiest alternative. Retelling what had happened six years ago would bring it to the surface again, far worse than the occasional flashback or nightmare. He looked up at Hunter's intense gaze on him. His internal sirens wailed and a clear message to abort the conversation blared in his head. "You know, you're not supposed to be calling him Cam."

"He hates the WITSEC names and he refuses to sleep with me if I use them. So we use nicknames."

"Do I want to know the nicknames?" Aidan asked with a tired smile.

"No." Hunter groaned and gripped the back of his own neck. "How long before you think you can get everything wrapped up with the drug and crime ring case and gauge if Cam's linked to any other potential arrests?"

"I don't know." His focus absently shifted to Jessie and the monitors still displaying the same steady peaks and numbers before returning his attention to his friend. "Jessie's been helping me, but we're not moving along as quickly as we'd hoped. Maybe Cam is only linked to Rick's case, but I don't know for sure. After all, he did essentially cut off the head of the snake, so to speak, when he took him down. I could grill Rick, but that slippery son of a bitch is still running things from within the prison walls. He's actually requested to see me."

Hunter's brow lowered. "You need to be careful with him. He's a smart, dangerous, manipulative prick who managed to head up a crime and drug ring for over a decade without getting caught."

"I know," Aidan said with a sigh. "How's Cam holding up?"

Hunter quieted, staring off to the side as if lost in thought. "He built up his business and it all disappeared when they moved us to the next location. From one day to the next, it all went away." He remained quiet for a few moments, no doubt reliving those few days again and the toll it had taken on his partner. "Constantly moving and changing names… It's been tough. Three times in the last year. Hell, they moved us twice in eight weeks. Me and Dad, we manage, but Cam can't seem to get his footing again." He ran his hand through his closely cropped hair and exhaled a heavily weighted breath. "He begs me to call him by his real name when we're alone." He rubbed his bearded face and stared at Aidan as if ready to drop another bomb on his lap. "I need to get us out of the program."

"Fuck, Hunter." Aidan groaned and buried his head in his hands. "I know it's voluntary, but you can't leave the program until I know it's safe. The moment you walk away they won't protect you guys."

"I know there's a risk, but
this
is his home," Hunter said, jabbing his finger toward the ground to emphasize the point. His silver-gray eyes burned with a fire Aidan hadn't seen since their shared time in the battlefield. "Whatever I need to do to get him back here, consider it done. If I need to be his personal bodyguard, I will, but I need him to be happy. Besides, he refuses to marry me with a fake name. He says it won't feel real."

Great. Let's turn the pressure cooker up a notch.
Aidan looked over his shoulder, timing the rise and fall of Jessie's chest, matching it to the steady whoosh and click of the machine. "You need to go."

"And you need to get some sleep. Don't think for a moment I didn't pick up on your subject-change tactic. But I'll let it slide because you look like you're going to pass out from exhaustion. I'll watch over Jessie and you. Go sit over there and get some sleep."

Aidan returned his focus to his friend. He was too damn tired. He needed Jessie's light to guide him through his murky, dark internal abyss. "I'm not winning this argument, am I?"

Hunter arched an eyebrow. "What do you think?"

Resigned, Aidan rose from his seat and walked over to the more comfortable chair at Jessie's bedside, suddenly feeling the weight of all the sleepless nights bearing down on every muscle in his body. He sat and stretched, turning to look over at Jessie's still body in the bed. He tentatively reached out and carefully laid his hand on Jessie's, thankful for the contact that seemed to instantly soothe his inner turmoil.

"Good night," he said, maybe to Hunter who sat in the room or to Jessie who lay in bed in his line of sight. Too tired to decipher the jumble of thoughts filling his mind, he finally surrendered as sleep came barreling in, commanding his attention.

* * * *

Aidan stretched his arms and yawned, feeling far more rested than he had in the last few weeks. He immediately turned to Jessie, his still body in the exact same position as the night before. He reached behind his neck and tried to squeeze the kink out of his muscles, straightening in the chair at the sound of muffled voices. Hunter and Cole spoke softly, quieted, then turned to face him. Aidan slowly stood and Cole took a step back. In a split second, Aidan sprinted toward Cole, ready to attack, stopping only with the force of Hunter grabbing him by the waist.

"Calm the hell down. He was worried about you," Hunter said.

Aidan jabbed his finger toward Cole who stood with his back against the door. "You could have put them in danger, you son of a bitch! Do you have any idea—"

"I'm not stupid," Cole said from a distance. "Geek hooked us up with a VPN and an IP anonymizer that triple-encrypts everything. We were careful as hell and only communicate with code on a message board. And I was worried about you, dumbass."

Aidan breathed heavily, fighting the hold on him as he tried to balance the anger and now the confusion from Cole's words. He'd met Geek during a sting more than six months ago. The guy from Cole's old crew stored more tech details in that impressive brain than Aidan could ever possibly learn in a lifetime. If anyone could implement the tech needed to keep any sort of remote communication safe, Geek was the guy to do that.

Cole took a cautious step forward, nearing Aidan and Hunter. "You're tough, but everyone breaks. I know you've got Ty, but he tells me no one gets through to you the way Hunter does." He stopped and tugged on his beanie cap. He crossed his arms and took another daring step forward. "I figured you'd need Hunter here for support."

Aidan didn't say a word. He loathed himself and his inability to keep his emotions in check.

"You can hate me all you want, but you need to be here for Jessie so you need to get through this. I'll be here for him too, but you're the support rock. I'm the comic relief."

Aidan finally pulled out of Hunter's hold. Cole hesitated, obviously debating if he should take a step back, but decided to stand his ground. Aidan walked over to his self-proclaimed future-brother-in-law and wrapped a single arm around his stocky, broad shoulders. "Thanks," he whispered then quickly released Cole before stepping away.

Cole looked at him, blinking in stunned silence.

"Now that we're all playing nice…Cole, I need you to take Aidan to his house and make sure he packs a bag and gets whatever else he needs. I'm guessing that once I leave, the man is going to sprout roots in this room until Jessie wakes."

Cole quickly nodded, and Aidan turned toward Hunter, narrowing his eyes.

"Don't look at me like that. You're the one who wants me to leave. I refuse to go unless I know you have what you need in this room to get you through the day." He looked over to Cole. "I'm assuming you drove here, right?"

Cole nodded again then gave him a wicked grin. "I've got a badass ride someone left me."

Hunter snorted on a chuckle.

"And…just an FYI. You're not getting it back."

Hunter's laugh echoed in the room.

The corners of Aidan's mouth twitched, imagining Jessie's laughter with their conversation. He glanced over to Jessie and the hint of his smile quickly faded and the pain in his chest throbbed.

"Aidan?"

He numbly turned to face Hunter.

"Go with Cole. Get your things. Talk to your boss. Pick up your car from Jessie's apartment. Get your shit in order so you can come back here. Understand?"

Right now, all his thoughts focused on the lean frame resting on the hospital bed and nothing else made sense. Commands from his former sergeant? That he could do.

Cole shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "Aidan, the sooner we leave the sooner you get back here."

He nodded. Back here quickly, yeah, that was the priority. He turned toward Hunter. "Did you bring a gun?"

"I'm a teacher now. You think I stash that shit under my lesson plans?"

Aidan raised his boot onto the chair, removed the smaller gun from the hidden holster, then handed it over to his friend. "Not your usual, but it'll work in a pinch just in case this asshole tries to get into Jessie's room. I'll be back as soon as I can." He walked over to Cole who still watched him with extreme caution.

"Cole?" Hunter said.

Cole's focus shifted to Hunter. "Yeah?"

"If he was going to attack, he would have done it by now. He has no patience. So you're safe."

Cole nodded and blew out a relieved breath.

"For now," Hunter added with a smirk.

Aidan felt the tug at his lips again and walked toward the door, pulling Cole by a grip behind the neck. He had to talk to his captain, pack a bag, and fuck if he could think past two steps on a list when all his thoughts focused on Jessie and returning to his bedside. Whatever the hell he needed to do, he needed to get it all wrapped up quickly. He stole another glance back at Jessie lying in bed, trying to ignore the pain that tightened his chest.