A Million Tiny Pieces (21 page)

Not
that she cared.

Not
anymore.

“Well,
I think it was smart for you to have someone to watch your back,” Mia told
Phoenix. “Damien never hired a bodyguard. He insisted that he was man enough to
take on any threat.”

“He’s
also a fucking idiot,” Phoenix stated under his breath, his tone reflecting his
apparent dislike for her ex-husband.

“Sorry,
I didn’t mean to bring him up,” she told him, looking down at the table.

Phoenix
took her hand, and she peered back up at him. “Landry’s part of your past, Mia.
I don’t expect you to be able to talk about yourself without his name coming
up. Do I like the guy? No. But that’s for personal reasons.”

“So
you know him?” she asked, trepidation churning in her gut. She knew Damien was
suing Phoenix, but he’d never brought it up, so she hadn’t, either. Mostly out
of fear that he wouldn’t want anything to do with her. The first time they’d
gone to dinner, Phoenix had seemed oblivious to anything to do with Damien, yet
she knew that wasn’t the case.

Phoenix
released her hand and leaned back when the waiter delivered another round of
margaritas and started taking empty plates from the table. “I know him. I’m
actually surprised that you hadn’t heard of
me
. Landry claims that my
father backed out of a deal to sell the Arrows, right before he passed away.
He’s suing me for a ridiculous amount of money to compensate for his time.”

“He
wanted to buy your team?” Mia asked, trying to think back to previous
conversations she’d overheard when she was married to Damien. She hadn’t
usually been privy to his business because he’d believed that she wasn’t smart
enough to understand, and quite frankly, Mia had never corrected him. “I knew
he’d become obsessed with hockey, but I didn’t know he was looking to go that
far.”

“So
he claims. It’s all hearsay at this point, because my father’s not here to
defend himself,” Phoenix said, his tone reassuring.

“So
what happens now? With the lawsuit?”

Phoenix
met her gaze and leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table and clasping
his hands together. She looked over at Tarik, then back to Phoenix. She knew
that whatever he was about to say wasn’t going to make her happy. At least not
if his expression was anything to go by.

“I
met with him a few weeks ago and informed him that he needs to go away. I’m not
interested in him or anything he has to say.”

“A
few weeks ago?” Mia couldn’t believe what she was hearing. If Phoenix had
spoken to Damien a few weeks ago, the chances of him making the connection to
her had to be rather great. The guy was smart, there was no denying that. She
had to wonder why he hadn’t said anything. “Before or after you and I went to
dinner?”

“Before.”

“Why
did you act like you had no idea who he was?” she asked, exasperated. She should’ve
known. He was a liar, like Damien.

“That’s
not entirely true,” he stated cautiously. “You asked if I’d looked into your
history. I told you that I would prefer to hear the details straight from you.
There’s a big damn difference there. He’s your
ex
-husband, Mia. I didn’t
think that was relevant.”

“So
you knew exactly who I was when you had that meeting with Damien?”

“Yes,”
he admitted.

“And
when you manipulated the seating chart at the charity ball?” She didn’t know
for a fact that he was responsible, but based on what Alex had told her, she
figured it was safe to assume.

Phoenix
looked at Tarik before nodding his head.

When
Phoenix’s gaze lowered to the table once more, she knew that was guilt. He’d
pretended not to know who she was. So the big question was… “Why? Why did you
pretend?”

“I
didn’t pretend,” he said defensively, looking up at Tarik and then back to her.
“I wanted to get to know
you
. I don’t give a shit about Landry or the
fact that you were married to him. That’s your past, and it doesn’t mean
anything unless you want it to, Mia. Last I checked, you weren’t party to the
lawsuit, so I didn’t think it mattered.”

Mia
didn’t know what to say to that. She was angry and hurt, and for whatever
reason, all the millions of tiny pieces of her shattered heart were rattling
around in her chest, aching all over again. Although for an entirely different
reason now. Damien had been blatant with his adultery. He’d purposely ended
their marriage by making it obvious that he’d cheated, and he hadn’t tried to
hide anything. But Phoenix… He clearly wasn’t being honest with her. He was
pretending.

And
that hurt more than it should have.

“I’d
like to go home now,” she told him abruptly.

Phoenix
nodded his head in understanding and moved out of the booth to allow her to get
up. When she stood, stopping to look at Tarik briefly, she couldn’t resist
asking him the same question. “Did you know about this?”

Tarik
met her gaze head on. “I know everything that goes on with Phoenix, Mia.”

Nodding
her understanding while the band around her heart tightened even more, Mia
tried to calm herself. She was so angry she felt tears threatening, and the
absolute last thing she would do was let another man see her cry. She’d done
enough of that with Damien.

Turning
on her heel, Mia snagged her coat and headed for the front doors. Phoenix and
Tarik followed right behind her.

Mia
continued walking until she was outside while Phoenix stopped and talked with
the hostess.

She
was tempted to start walking home, but her condo was several blocks away, and
she wasn’t comfortable walking alone that far from home. Especially as the sun
was beginning to set behind the buildings, and the shadows were slowly filling
in. So she waited, trying her best not to let the anger get the best of her.
She found it strange that she felt betrayed by Phoenix in ways she’d never felt
by Damien. It wasn’t like she knew him all that well. They’d been on a couple
of dates, they’d talked and kissed, but other than that…

God,
she felt so pathetic standing there feeling as though someone else had
purposely trashed her heart for reasons unbeknownst to her. She was a
lightweight when it came to relationships, that was clear. Why couldn’t she be
stronger? More resilient? Wasn’t she starting over? Taking control of her own
life? Living in the moment?

Shouldn’t
she be the one with armor encasing her emotions?

Unfortunately,
she didn’t have answers to any of those questions.

Instead,
she was worried that Phoenix was playing her.

Mia
took a deep breath, let it out.

Hadn’t
she kept that information from him as well?

She
hated the thought that they’d started this off with secrets between them, but
that was exactly what had happened. Mia was doing her best to sever her life
from Damien’s. She didn’t want any part of him or anything he did.

But
why hadn’t Phoenix mentioned that he’d met with Damien? Was he using her? He’d
already said that Damien’s beef had been with his father, not him. And it
wasn’t like Phoenix could use her against Damien, anyway. Her ex-husband had initiated
the downfall of their marriage; she seriously doubted he actually cared.

Mia
sighed, looking up at the sky as it turned a fascinating shade of dark blue,
mixed with pink and purple. She really needed to get a grip.

This
wasn’t a relationship. If anything, it might lead to something casual, but Mia
wasn’t looking for anything more.

When
Phoenix and Tarik joined her outside a second later, she turned to face them.
And the music. She’d overreacted.

“I’m
sorry for my reaction,” she told Phoenix sternly, feeling both embarrassed and
annoyed at her initial response. “I have trust issues, as you can imagine. I
think I got a little ahead of myself. You and I … we’re … we’re friends, and I
shouldn’t have reacted like that.”

To
her surprise, Phoenix moved closer, his eyes locked with hers, his mouth a
firm, thin line. He cupped her face and stared down at her, the look on his
face reflecting what appeared to be … irritation.

Not
at all what she’d expected.

“We’re
more than friends, Mia. At least that’s what I’m hoping for,” he said, his voice
low, authoritative. “If you want friendship, I can offer you that, but I’m
looking for more. I can assure you, I didn’t withhold information to hurt you.
That’s not the way I do things. From this point forward, I’ll be open with you
about what I know.”

Mia
was lost in his emerald-green gaze. She heard his words, but it wasn’t what he
said that had her mesmerized, it was the intensity reflected there. He wasn’t
playing her as she’d assumed. How she knew that, she wasn’t sure, but she knew
that much.

Not
that it made her feel any better. She’d felt used by Damien and then tossed out
like yesterday’s garbage. She wasn’t looking for that again. Ever. But she
didn’t know how to do this, didn’t know how to venture forward without the fear
strangling her. Casual sex wasn’t her thing. She’d only been with one man in
her life, and he’d betrayed her.

“Do
you want to go back inside and have dessert?” he asked, his hands sliding down
to her shoulders and then running down her arms.

Mia
glanced through the window of the restaurant and noticed the hostess and
another man staring out at them. “No. I don’t.”

“What
about a movie?” Phoenix asked. “That was next on my agenda.”

Mia
was too tired to sit in a darkened theater and watch a movie. “No. I think I’d
rather go home.”

“Why
don’t we go back to my place then? I’m sure I’ve got something there for
dessert.”

Before
she could object, Phoenix linked his fingers with hers. The warmth of his touch
calmed her further.

“Just
dessert, Mia. That’s all. What happens from there is your call.”

Despite
knowing better, Mia found herself agreeing.

THE
NIGHT HAD taken a decidedly unexpected twist, but somehow Phoenix had managed
to salvage it.

He
hoped.

After
the little blowup in the restaurant, he had been practically holding his
breath, waiting for Mia to decide to call it a night after all. Things had
taken a strange turn ever since they’d sat down for dinner, starting with Mia’s
unexpected question about bisexuality. She’d taken him completely by surprise,
something that was usually relatively difficult to do.

It
wasn’t until the elevator made it past her floor that he exhaled, more relieved
than he’d expected to be. It wasn’t a regular occurrence for Phoenix to have to
put so much effort into a woman. Not that he considered this effort, but he
admittedly was used to women coming to him, not the opposite. He definitely
liked the turn of events as far as Mia was concerned, but he hadn’t realized
until now just how much emotion went into the chase.

Or
how easy it would be to damage something so fragile.

When
the elevator doors opened on his floor, Phoenix allowed Mia and Tarik to
precede him. He kept his gaze on Mia, watching as she looked around while Tarik
unlocked the front door and then waited for them to join him.

“Cinnamon-scented
pinecones, huh?” she asked, a small smile curling the corners of her mouth. “A
little late in the season, don’t you think?”

“I
knew that’s where that smell was coming from.”

Mia
chuckled. “I take it they weren’t your idea?”

Phoenix
looked at Tarik.

“Don’t
look at me. I didn’t do that. Your mother thought it was a good way to spruce
things up out here. You should’ve seen the Christmas tree that she put up.”

“Does
she live close?” Mia asked as they stepped into Phoenix’s penthouse.

“In
this building.” Phoenix closed the front door and locked it behind them. “When
my father passed away, she sold their house. I think the idea of being closer
to me worked for her, since she likes to make surprise visits from time to
time,” he explained when Mia glanced at the front door and then back to him.

“It’s
nice that you get to see her all the time.” Mia turned away from him as she
shrugged out of her coat and looked around the spacious room. “My mother works
a lot. I get that she’s dedicated to her patients, but sometimes it would be
nice if she would drop by to see me unexpectedly.”

Tarik
glanced his way as Mia turned toward the living room, moving farther away from
them.

Phoenix
wondered what she thought as she took it all in. His place felt more sterile
than hers did. He didn’t have any pillows on the black leather sectional that
sat facing the wall of windows. The chrome and glass end tables didn’t hold
vases of flowers, and the black-and-white rug on the hardwood floors didn’t
have a splash of color. But it suited him.

“Ellen
drops by every day to check on her little boy,” Tarik told her as he led Mia
into the living room.

“What
about your parents?” she asked Tarik.

“My
father’s in…” Tarik glanced toward the windows. “He’s in prison.”

“Oh,”
Mia said, her eyes never straying from Tarik’s face. “And your mother?”

Phoenix
could tell she was hesitant about asking that question, but he knew that Tarik
was even more hesitant to answer. The man didn’t make a habit of talking about
himself. To anyone.

“My
father’s in prison for killing my mother,” Tarik said tersely, moving away from
them.

Shit.

Phoenix
knew Tarik hated talking about his parents. Then again, when most people asked
personal questions, Tarik found a way to shrug them off, saying as little as
possible. Phoenix was surprised he hadn’t done the same now. It was proof of
how much he liked Mia.

“This
is nice,” Mia said, discernably working to change the subject. “What? No
television?”

“Not
in this room, which is why I spend little time here,” Phoenix told her, taking
off his coat and laying it on the back of the sofa before thrusting his hands
into the pockets of his jeans as he casually moved closer.

“See,
I’d be spending all my time here,” she explained, looking out the windows at
the Austin skyline. “I prefer music and reading to television, anyway.”

“I
don’t read unless I have to. Music is for working out. And television, although
rare thanks to my schedule, is one way I manage to relax.”

“When
you’re not playing hooky from work, I take it you’re working.” Mia’s sexy smile
was like a punch to the gut, and Phoenix wanted to pull her to him — actually,
he wanted to pull her on top of him while he was sprawled out on the couch
naked — but he managed to abstain.

“I
do,” he said, sparing one more glance in Tarik’s direction before turning
toward the kitchen. “I have no idea what we’ve got for dessert, but I’m sure I
can find something. Worst case, we’ll order out and have it delivered.”

“I’m
sure there’s something to scrounge,” Mia commented.

“Phoenix
doesn’t cook,” Tarik said, his voice coming from directly behind him.

“Me?
You don’t cook, either,” he retorted as he stepped into the kitchen, Mia right
behind him.

“I
like to cook,” she told them. “It doesn’t happen often, because cooking for one
is a waste of time, so I eat TV dinners mostly. And for dessert, I usually
binge on ice cream or Oreos. Sometimes both.”

“We
tend to order out.” Phoenix had a damn hard time not looking at her lips, not
thinking about what she tasted like, how her smooth skin felt beneath his
hands.

He
didn’t even realize their conversation had come to a jarring halt until Mia
looked away, her cheeks turning pink. Phoenix was standing directly in front of
her, Tarik flanking her back.

Knowing
that resisting her was pointless, Phoenix gave in and crowded her against
Tarik, meeting the other man’s eyes above her head briefly before cupping her
face and forcing her to look at him.

“I’m
sorry about earlier,” Phoenix whispered. “I had a great time today. It probably
ranked up there with the best days of my life, actually. I didn’t mean to ruin
it.”

“You
didn’t,” she said softly, her eyes sliding down to his mouth.

“I
did. But I intend to make it up to you. My culinary skills suck, but I’ll do my
best.”

He
had fully intended to lighten the mood, but apparently his words had the
opposite effect, and the next thing he knew, Mia’s hands were sliding up to his
face, her soft, cool fingers brushing against the day’s worth of stubble on his
cheeks moments before she pulled his head down.

“I
was thinking about something else for dessert,” she whispered, her breath
fanning over his lips.

He
should’ve resisted, should’ve stolen a quick kiss to sate him temporarily, but
the hunger had built to a crescendo, and Phoenix found himself lifting Mia,
then turning and setting her on the counter before settling between her thighs,
his mouth on hers.
The heat of Tarik’s body moved behind him, his chest pressing against Phoenix’s
back, and suddenly he was overwhelmed by the sensation of being sandwiched
between the two of them.

They’d
never done anything like this. Well, nothing beyond that one time, but that had
been a fluke. This… This was intentional. Generally, when they were with a
woman, it was for her pleasure mostly. Tarik never focused his attention
elsewhere. Then again, until recently, Phoenix hadn’t actually given him
permission to.

But
now…

Phoenix’s
heart began a rapid, erratic beat in his chest as Tarik moved closer behind
him, his hands gripping Phoenix’s hips while Phoenix’s lips continued to move
against Mia’s. He allowed her to lead briefly, her tongue thrusting into his
mouth, and he met her with a blinding passion, licking, tasting, exploring. He
slowly slid his hands beneath her shirt, feeling the smooth skin of her
abdomen. He did his best to keep things as innocent as he could, but that
didn’t last nearly as long as he’d intended, especially when her hands slipped
beneath his shirt, searching at the same time Tarik’s did.

“Oh,
hell,” Phoenix moaned, pulling his mouth from Mia’s as the two of them
continued to touch him.

He
wasn’t sure what he would see when he opened his eyes, but the look on Mia’s
face was one of encouragement, not revulsion. When the silk of her fingers
disappeared, he realized that was because she had placed her hands over
Tarik’s, guiding him.

“Mia.”
He wanted to warn her, to let her know he was close to the breaking point, but
he couldn’t get the words out. He wasn’t sure she even realized what she was
doing to him, to them. Phoenix had been holding back, resisting Tarik for so
long, it was natural. But right then, with Tarik’s hands on his stomach, the
tips of his fingers sliding into the waistband of his jeans, Phoenix wasn’t sure
he could stop this if Mia wanted him to.

He’d
met this woman a little over a month ago, and he felt as though he’d known her
forever. Her skin felt familiar, her taste conjured memories he knew didn’t
exist, her sweet moans had his dick pulsing as though it knew how exquisite
this was going to be. Yet he didn’t know her. Not yet.

But
he did know Tarik, and the emotions that churned through him where the other
man was concerned were far greater than he could even admit to. He wanted him
with a passion that defied logic, one that defied reason. Wrong or right, he
didn’t care anymore, because he couldn’t hold back any longer. The last thing
he wanted to do was scare Mia away, but he owed this to himself, to Tarik. They
had to have a chance to see where this went.

But
not yet.

When
her hands once again touched his skin, gliding higher beneath his shirt,
Phoenix pulled back to look at her, letting her explore, although it went
against everything in him. He was always in control, never conceding,
especially when it came to sex, but here he was, offering himself up to her and
Tarik at the same time.

“Shirt
off,” she whispered, forcing the cotton higher. Tarik did the work for him,
lifting his shirt until Phoenix was forced to pull his hands from beneath Mia’s
shirt so he could remove it, but he put them back as quickly as possible,
relishing the smoothness of her skin.

“Fuck,”
he growled when Mia’s mouth went to his chest, Tarik’s lips pressing against
his shoulder, their tongues trailing over him slowly. When Mia clipped his
nipple with her teeth, he thought for sure he was going to come right there in
his fucking jeans.

“Mia,”
he warned again. “Please tell me you understand what’s happening here.”

Mia
looked up at him, her eyes hooded, the heat reflected there a sure sign of her
passion, but Phoenix still needed to hear her say the words. This wasn’t only
the two of them.

“I
understand,” she whispered back, her eyes sliding up to Tarik. “I understand
more than I thought I would.”

Phoenix
swallowed hard and closed his eyes as she continued her exploration with her
hands and mouth.

“Relax,”
Tarik said softly against his ear. “It’s all about you right now.”

That
was something he’d said to a countless number of women, but never had anyone
said it to him. He felt a sense of helpless pleasure, a yearning he’d never
known before. And truth be told, it scared him. He didn’t want Mia to do
something that she would regret. Didn’t want her rethinking this once they got
so far into it that they lost themselves in the moment.

Phoenix
closed his eyes as she explored him with her mouth and her hands. He gripped
her hips forcefully, keeping himself as still as he could while he wanted
nothing more than to strip her bare and devour her right there on his kitchen
counter. He didn’t know how long he managed to hold himself back — it could’ve
been seconds, possibly minutes — but finally that little thread that held him
together snapped, and Phoenix reached behind him and grabbed Tarik’s neck,
holding him to him.

“I
don’t want this to backfire,” Phoenix mumbled. “God help me, I want this more
than my next breath.”

“Relax,”
Mia said, repeating Tarik’s instruction from moments ago. “We all know what
we’re doing.”

He
wasn’t so sure that was the case, but he was losing himself, losing his ability
to maintain control, to worry about how Mia would handle this when she realized
what Phoenix wanted from Tarik, and more importantly…

What
they both wanted from her.