A Perfect Gentle Knight (21 page)

“You're getting to be as pretty as Mum,” said Roz softly.

G
RADUATION WAS MUCH MORE
fun than Corrie expected. School ended at noon. As soon as the bell rang the class shouted,

No more pencils,

No more books!

No more teachers'

Dirty looks!

Mr. Zelmach made a terrible face as they rushed past him out the door.

After lunch Corrie washed her face and hands and changed into her new dress.

“You look like a princess!” said Orly when she came down the stairs.

“You look very nice, Cordelia,” Fa told her. Corrie held his hand as they walked back to school together. Her stiff dress kept bumping into his side.

Corrie waved to Fa from the stage, proud of how distinguished he looked in the crowd of parents. After the ceremony, as she stood beside him clutching her certificate, Mr. Zelmach came up and shook Fa's hand.

“I'm very pleased to meet you, Professor Bell,” he said. “Corrie has been a credit to the class, and she's sure to do well in junior high—even in arithmetic, right, Corrie? I'll see you at the concert!” He walked away to greet more parents.

“What concert?” said Fa, looking befuddled as usual.

Corrie grinned. “I told you about it a long time ago, Fa! In July we're singing in a concert to celebrate B.C.'s centennial. We have to go downtown with a lot of other schools.”

“Remind me of the date and I'll be sure to come,” said Fa.

“You will?”

“Of course I will! And I'm sorry I haven't met your teacher before now. He seems like a nice young man.”

Young? Mr. Zelmach had told them he was thirty-six! But Corrie supposed he must seem young to Fa.

After school Corrie tore off her dress and prickly crinoline and got into the red pedal-pushers and top. Meredith's father drove them to the party. Sharon's house was as large as the Bells', but it was clean and tidy and smelled like beeswax. Corrie's heart thudded as they entered the rumpus room. It seemed like a room full of strangers. The girls giggled and whispered on one side and the boys stood silently on the other, eyeing the food.

Corrie wanted to bolt. But slowly the party improved. Sharon's mother pinned papers on every person's back with half of the name of a nursery rhyme on them, like “Jack,” “Fiddle,” or “Humpty.” They had to go around and find the rest of their rhyme by asking questions. The questions and laughter made everyone relax and remember that they were still the same people as every day in school.

Then Sharon's aunt arrived to teach them square dancing. Corrie enjoyed prancing around as the woman called out, “Swing your pardner, do-si-do!” No one had to worry about being asked to dance; they picked numbers and chose partners that way.

Corrie's was Jamie. The two of them giggled as they stepped on each other's toes. They sat together as they ate the delicious sundaes Sharon's mother had made.

On the way home in the car Meredith whispered, “You're so lucky you got Jamie instead of awful Frank, the way I did! Do you
like
him?”

Corrie squirmed. “Sure, I like him. He's much nicer than he used to be. But he's just a boy in our class, nothing special,” she added firmly. It was important to nip any silliness of Meredith's in the bud.

To “nip in the bud …” Aunt Madge used to say that. Corrie wondered if Fa had told Aunt Madge about Sebastian. The lightness of the day left her, and she began to worry about tomorrow.

18

The Death of Sir Lancelot

C
orrie woke up on June 27 with her usual airy first-day-of-the-summer-holidays feeling. Then she remembered: Sebastian was coming home that afternoon.

She spent the morning at Meredith's, helping her pack. The Coopers were taking the train that evening to Alberta, to stay at Mrs. Cooper's parents' cottage for all of July. “I
wish
you could come too, Corrie,” Meredith told her.

“Never mind,” her mother said. “We'll be back in August, and you two can have a joint birthday party. Won't that be fun?”

Corrie smiled. She would miss Mrs. Cooper almost as much as she would miss Meredith. She stayed for lunch, and then she couldn't prolong going home any longer. At least the Coopers' hugs gave her strength.

“Let's grow our hair this summer!” said Meredith. “Then this fall we can have
ponytails
!”

“Okay,” grinned Corrie.

“Please give our regards to your family, Corrie,” said Mrs. Cooper. “I'm sure you'll find that your brother is much better.”

All the way home Corrie prayed that this would be true.

Fa went off in a taxi to get Sebastian. Roz, Corrie, Harry, Juliet, and Orly all waited in the living room. Even the twins had nothing to say.

“He's here!” Juliet rushed to the door, Orly close behind her.

Sebastian walked in as casually as if he were coming home from school on an ordinary day. “Hello, everybody,” he said quietly.

Corrie gasped. He had cut his hair! His beautiful knightly hair was as short as any other teenaged boy's, slicked back from his forehead with cream. He had gained weight and his skin had cleared up, but his grey eyes were dull.

Roz brought in a jug of lemonade.

“Are you still sick, Sebastian?” Juliet asked.

“Juliet! That's rude!” said Roz.

“It's all right,” said Sebastian. “No, Juliet, I'm not still sick. I'm much better. And I'm sorry I caused you all so much trouble.”

Corrie shivered. His voice was careful and even, as if he had rehearsed his words.

“Trouble!” Fa put his hand on Sebastian's shoulder. “This was my fault, my boy, not yours. Listen, my dears, I have many things I want to tell you.”

Fa actually looked frightened of them. They put down their glasses and gave him their full attention.

Fa apologized for neglecting them since Mum had died. He said that he should have noticed far sooner that Sebastian was unhappy. “I've been escaping these past years into my work,” he said. “I suppose it was my way of grieving for your mother. Just as Sebastian escaped into being Sir Lancelot, right, my boy? But that's all over now. Sebastian and I have been doing a lot of talking. We're both going to try to live more in reality, right?”

Sebastian nodded stiffly as Fa continued. “It's unfair that Sebastian and Rosalind and Cordelia had to take care of everything.
I
should have been doing that, not assuming Mrs. Oliphant was.”

“We hate her!” said Juliet.

Fa smiled. “I know you found her difficult. Well, she found you difficult too! Several times I had to raise her salary to keep her from leaving. A month ago, however, she gave me her notice. I persuaded her to stay until school was out. Yesterday was her last day with us.”

“Yay!” shouted Orly.

Corrie hadn't even noticed that the Elephant wasn't here today. And Mrs. Oliphant hadn't said goodbye to them. She probably disliked them as much as they disliked her. None of them had ever asked her anything personal. They had ignored her, as if she were a robot, because that was how Sebastian wanted it.

“But who will do all the cooking and cleaning?” asked Roz. “We can manage in the summer, but what about after we're back at school?”

“Don't worry, Rosalind. In the fall we'll find someone you like. I'll make sure of that. And this summer
I'm
going to take care of the house.”

They gaped at him. “You?”

“Don't look so surprised! I used to cook quite a lot before I met your mother—I was a confirmed old bachelor when she married me, remember. And anyone can clean. I want to spend more time with you, and I want to give you a rest. It's not right that children your age should have to do all that you've been doing.”

“But what about your book?” asked Corrie.

“I've told my publishers that my book has been indefinitely postponed.” Fa gazed at them fondly. “If there's one thing I've learned from all this, it's that you are infinitely more important than any book.”

Bubbles of hope rose in Corrie. Fa loved them! He was going to take care of them!

But Sebastian's new appearance and empty eyes and bland voice scared her. Still, at least he was home, and he looked much healthier. Surely he would soon become his old self again. Surely everything was going to be fine.

F
OR A MONTH
it almost was. Every morning Fa got up early and cooked them pancakes or bacon and eggs. He vacuumed and polished and dusted and wouldn't let anyone help. “Go and play!” he ordered. He hired people to get rid of the mice and the silverfish, to repair the sagging gate, to cut the vine in Corrie's room, and to prune and weed the garden.

The house shone as it hadn't for years; Corrie thought it seemed grateful for all the attention, the way it had at Christmas. The air smelled of baking or casseroles, just as it had when Aunt Madge lived with them.

Corrie woke up in her clean room every morning feeling almost carefree. Her only worry was the person she always worried about—Sebastian.

The day before Sebastian had come home, Fa had told them, “Sebastian will be all right eventually, but he'll be going through many changes. It's as if he has shed one self and is growing a new one. You'll have to be patient while he finds out who that self is.”

Corrie found it hard to be patient. Sebastian was like a polite stranger who was visiting the family. He had neglected his schoolwork so much last term that he was taking two courses over again at summer school so he could enter high school in the fall. He spent a lot of time studying. When he wasn't, he taught the twins how to ride the new bikes Fa had bought them, or he went to the swimming pool or the library with Corrie and Harry. He joined the family on expeditions to the beach or to Stanley Park. Even he and Roz were friends again. He teased her about Ronnie and she helped him with math, which she was good at.

The trouble was, Sebastian was
too
polite and helpful. His smile was artificial and his words continued to sound rehearsed. He only spoke when spoken to and the rest of the time was eerily silent. It was as if he were pretending to be normal the way he used to pretend to be Sir Lancelot.

Worst of all, he didn't confide in Corrie. Fa talked to him a lot; almost every evening he visited Sebastian in his room. Corrie felt jealous every time she saw the closed door.

One evening she tried knocking on it after Fa had gone downstairs. “Hi, Corrie,” said Sebastian, with the strained smile that made Corrie wince. “Did you want something?”

Corrie shrugged. “I just wanted to say hi. How are you?” she asked softly.

“I'm fine,” said Sebastian.

“Did you … did you have a nice time at the doctor's today?” Once a week Sebastian visited Dr. Samuel. Fa talked to the psychiatrist on another day. He said he was learning how to be a father again.

“It was all right.”

“What do you talk about?” asked Corrie.

“Oh, lots of things.” Corrie knew from his closed expression that he wouldn't tell her more.

“Do you like him?”

Sebastian flushed. “He's okay. Corrie, it's very nice to talk to you, but I have a lot of homework to do.”

Corrie skittered out, mortified at her dumb questions. How different this was from the easy conversations between Lancelot and Gareth!

Juliet kept asking Sebastian when they were going to have a Round Table meeting. “We haven't had one for a long time, and me and Orly want to be squires!” she complained.

“You can play at knights all you want,” Sebastian told her. “But I'm too old for that now.”

Corrie tried to take his place again by assembling the remaining members of the Round Table. Harry was pleased to be dubbed Sir Tristan—his trial was to eat a worm, which he did easily. Juliet and Orly were promoted to squires. The knights and squires had rousing tilting contests and sword fights in the yard, but Corrie couldn't bear to go to Joyous Gard after that awful night.

The next day, after roll call, as Sir Gareth was reading them a story, he put down the book.

“It's no use,” said Corrie, getting to her feet.

“What's the matter?” asked Harry.

“I can't play this game any more. I guess … I guess I'm just too old for it. You can be the head knight, Harry. You can all be knights. You can even choose your own names.”

“You mean I can be
Sir Lancelot
?” asked Harry.

“No!” said Corrie. Tears stung her eyes. “Anyone but him. Sir Lancelot is dead!”

Before they could respond, she ran out of the shed and up to her room. Sir Gareth was dead, too. In a way, Sir Lancelot had killed him, just like in the legend.

I'll never be a knight again, Corrie thought. She tried to cry some more, but after a few minutes it didn't seem important enough to cry about. She picked up her novel and became immersed in the adventures of the Borrowers. At least books were still magic.

For the next few days the house and yard were full of knights furiously knocking swords or lances together. Then the game petered out—the three remaining knights couldn't think of anything else to do but fight each other.

Corrie spent a whole day tidying up the shed. She threw away broken weapons and swept the floor. She gathered up pennants and armour and schedules and hawking hoods, put them in a box, wrote “Round Table stuff” on it, and pushed it into a corner. For a second she gazed sadly at it, but she had to get to her swimming class, and she ran out of the shed.

F
A WAS MUCH MORE
attuned to them now. He noticed that Juliet had lost a tooth and talked to Harry about being nicer to Orly. They sucked up his attention like thirsty sponges. Juliet stopped biting her nails, and Orly stopped being afraid of the dark. Roz teased Fa about his chubby middle and made him buy a new cardigan to replace the holey one he always wore. Best of all, Corrie often crawled into Fa's lap, even though she was getting so tall that she almost fell off.