A Restored Man (38 page)

"What about your job at the shop? You don't think you play a role there that's important?" Aidan asked in a tone far more understanding than what Cole had come to expect from him.

He shrugged again. "Ty's got a great team. He had that before I ever got there."

"And you're a part of that team now. He's going to keep you on so don't question that." Aidan leaned forward, nearing Cole. "You do have skills, you just haven't given them a name yet. You have a talent with cars and people." He raised his hands in surrender. "Present company excluded."

"Jerk," Cole said with a sideways smirk.

Aidan huffed a quiet chuckle. "The point is, you got through to Ty, and I can tell you,
I tried
. We all tried. Nothing worked. But
you
got through. And Ty tells me you're helping him with some project at the shop and have made more progress on it than he could have on his own. So you've succeeded where others have failed. You're a little misdirected sometimes, but I can see you're trying."

"You're being nice to me again," Cole said quietly.

"Don't get used to it. Thanks for dinner." Aidan stood and walked over to the kitchen, said his good-byes then left a few minutes later.

Cole sat on the couch for some time, long after Julian and Matt went to bed, pondering and replaying the conversation in his head, over and over. He knew he was loved by his family, but oftentimes, he was so busy trying to fit in, he'd lose himself in that role he tried to play.

He just wanted to find a place to call
home
, where he was accepted and felt comfortable being himself. Where he could make mistakes and not worry about whether he was a complete failure. Maybe then he could slow down and not have a million ideas circling in his mind all the time, of things he could do, improvements to be made, changes that were needed. The way his mind settled when he was at the shop working with Ty. The way his mind was sharp and focused on their weekends together. The way Ty set up an imaginary wall inside Cole's soul that prevented the doubt from planting roots. Ty calmed the constant, internal doubt. He accepted Cole as he was—with all his quirks and imperfections—and didn't try to change him or ever make him feel less than amazing. Ty's acceptance made him stronger and gave him an inner strength to let him be the man he knew he could be.

He pressed the heel of his hand to his forehead and screwed his eyes shut. He inhaled a shaky breath when his mind cleared and the realization came crashing in.

Ty was
home
.

He lowered himself on the couch in a lying position and tucked his folded arm under his head to use as a pillow. He took a deep breath as a smile tugged at his lips. He could see himself with
his
My-Ty, all day, every day.

His thoughts slowed to a tolerable hum and a sudden feeling of peace enveloped him. He closed his eyes and let the thoughts of Ty continue to calm him and slowly pull him into the darkness of sleep.

"You look like you're settling in," Geek commented.

Cole looked over to his friend and former partner in crime to see his teasing smirk. "Focus on your work." He ducked his head under the hood to hide his own smile.

"You're too big to hide under the hood."

"Shut up," Cole said, shoving Geek.

"You look happy."

Cole poked his head out from under the hood again. "I'm a happy guy," he said, punctuating the comment with a toothy grin.

Geek looked upward and shook his head. "Hey, I'm serious. Can we talk about something without you going all emo on me?"

Cole straightened and crossed his arms. He may be a lot of things but
emo
wasn't one of them. "Yeah."

Geek wiped his hands on the shop towel, busying himself probably trying to figure out which set of words to string together. Cole knew his friend worked best behind a computer or under a hood. He was great at figuring out systems, but people…not so much. "You changed in the end, with those last couple of jobs. We were worried about you." His friend looked over to Sadie who had pushed Ty away from his service ticket and taken over. "We knew what had happened but we couldn't talk about it." His friend turned to him, then quickly looked away.

"After my brother died," Cole finished the thought for him.

Geek nodded. "It was bad. You were always the planner, the methodical one. Suddenly, you were reckless. You'd take contracts without doing your usual due diligence, schedule them too close together. You even yelled a few times," he said quietly, worrying his lip. His focus returned to Sadie and the rest of the crew. "We were all worried about you." He sighed heavily as if a huge burden had been lifted off his shoulders. "We thought we were going to lose you."

Cole shoved his hands in his pockets, no longer having a tool in his hand to busy himself. "You did, for two years."

Geek looked back at Cole with a haunted expression in his eyes. "That's not what I meant."

Cole didn't know what to say, he knew he wasn't in the right headspace after Marco died. He glanced over to Ty, standing inside the edge of Sadie's section and smiled. She worked quickly and also commanded the space to do so, never letting anyone stand that close to her area. And certainly not answering questions as she disassembled an engine in record time. Yet there she was, letting Ty watch her and ask questions. Cole barely hid the smile when he saw her extend a hand and Ty plant a tool in her palm, like a surgeon asking for the next instrument during a procedure.

"I'm sorry I put you guys through that."

"Cole," Geek said, drawing his focus. "You're like a brother to us. For most of us, you're the only person who believed we could do something with ourselves."

"You guys have mad skills. A little misdirected sometimes," Cole said, remembering his recent conversation with Aidan.

Geek chuckled. "But you still made us feel valuable. You helped us figure out what we were good at and you helped us build on that. You knew we wouldn't be doing that forever and you made us see that."

"You make it sound as if you're on the straight and narrow now?" Cole asked with a wry grin.

Geek bit his lip to hide a smile. "Mostly straight. I do things occasionally just to keep up with my skills. You did teach us, 'practice makes you better, but never perfect'."

"I'm glad my life lessons were memorable."

They laughed and watched Sadie reassemble the engine with Ty standing at her side, handing her engine parts. The entire crew had stopped working to watch them.

"She never used to let anyone help," Cole said absently, watching their exchange.

"She still doesn't. I think that's why we're all just staring." Geek finally turned back to Cole. "Maybe that's because she realizes how important he is."

"It's his shop."

"That's not what I meant," Geek said. "He grounds you. The way you used to be, but you're even more focused now."

"He does," Cole said, looking over at Ty. "When I'm with him, I can be myself." He watched as Bear neared the workspace to snoop but Sadie immediately stepped away from the car and, in not so many words, made sure Bear returned to his spot. Ty glanced around, his gaze stopping on Cole. He tried to hide a smile but it was obvious he couldn't. He had admitted to Cole how much he liked the team and the feeling of family around them.

"Even Sadie likes him."

"I see that," Cole said to his friend, while his focus remained targeted on Ty.

"Cole, don't lose touch again. Stop freaking out about your tie to us. We don't have records, so it won't raise any flags. If you don't want to call us or email us, use those message boards I showed you how to use. But don't disappear."

Cole looked down at his boots. "Okay."

Geek grabbed Cole's shoulder, drawing his attention. "If you need anything, you get a hold of us. Any of us. Don't hesitate."

Cole nodded, not really sure what else to say without letting his friend's words affect him too much.

"Now let's get this finished up before the boss realizes we're slacking and violating one of his precious Three F rules," Geek said, bumping Cole's shoulder. "He can be a bit pushy where work is concerned."

"Smartass."

"And proud of it," Geek said smugly, returning to work.

Cole glanced back at his crew and smiled fondly. He had missed this—the candor, the sense of camaraderie. His crews' time at the shop would be over soon and he knew they'd be missed. He didn't want to dwell on it too much. He returned to his car and resumed his service ticket. He looked over his shoulder and saw Ty watching him. He couldn't resist and bent a little more than was needed, subtly shaking his ass in the process. He glanced over his shoulder again and saw Ty staring then quickly look away.

Cole bit back a smile. He couldn't wait for their weekend together. He liked being around the crew again, but nothing beat his time with Ty.

Ty turned in bed, groaning when his hand landed on the empty pillow next to him. He craned his neck to see the alarm clock on the side table and sighed.

Eight thirty in the morning.

On a Saturday.

Why the hell did Cole always wake up so early? He leaned back on the pillow and looked up to the ceiling, closing his eyes and enjoying the smell of breakfast in the air as it teased his senses. He rose from bed and stretched a few times to loosen his muscles. He slipped on his sleep pants and went to the bathroom, still yawning and grumbling, wondering why the hell he couldn't sleep in on weekends.

He walked out of the bathroom a few moments later, absently running his fingers through his freshly combed hair. He glanced over and caught his reflection in the full-length mirror. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He stood in front of the mirror and swung his head from side to side and flexed his hands, like a boxer prepping for a fight. He took another deep breath and finally exhaled, opening his eyes. He stood and stared, forcing himself to stay focused rather than turn away as he had each day that week. He inhaled a shaky breath but continued to follow a visual path of each scar in his reflection without looking away. Just before the urge to turn away kicked in, he glanced up and saw the printout of the photo Cole had taken of himself—exaggerated puckered lips pointed right at the camera. He smiled and took another deep breath and continued to look at his reflection.

This time, he didn't turn away.

After staring a few more minutes and proving to himself he could do so without turning away, he did a mental fist pump then decided to join Cole in the kitchen. He instinctively opened the dresser drawer and reached for the T-shirt. He paused just as his fingers grazed the cotton fabric. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

I can do this
.

He finally closed the drawer without taking the shirt and exited the room wearing nothing other than his pants.

He steeled himself before walking into the open space—trying not to cover his torso—opting instead to shove his hands in his pockets. He bit his lip to hide the smile when he saw Cole wearing nothing but an apron and tight, black Batman underwear, shaking his ass to some tune that played in his head. "You know, one of these mornings I want to wake up with you in my arms rather than an empty bed." He gave Cole a quick peck then took a seat at one of the barstools.

Cole gave him a million-watt smile and waved the spatula in his direction. "You know, one of these mornings, I actually want to be able to serve you breakfast in bed without you waking up before I get a chance to finish." He turned to flip and stir the food in the pan then walked over to where Ty sat at the counter. He reached out and wrapped his arms around Ty's neck and leaned in for a kiss.

"Mmm, and here I thought I was going to get reprimanded for messing up your breakfast-in-bed plans," Ty said, digging his fingers in Cole's waist.

"You skipped the shirt this morning." Cole brushed the back of Ty's neck with his thumb. "I know that wasn't easy."

"I had this really bad selfie taped to the corner of the mirror that distracted me. I forgot to grab a shirt."

Cole looked at him appraisingly, probably figuring out the level of bullshit in his excuse. His lips tightened to hide the smile his eyes couldn't disguise. "I'm damn proud of you." He leaned in for another kiss then returned to tend to breakfast.