A Shift in the Air (11 page)

“
You mean sane.” Mara sank
back against the cushions, the color draining from her cheeks. “You
know what’s happening to me. The quartz, the runes hold the
darkness at bay. But they won’t work forever.”

“
I don’t know. But…I’m
afraid you’ll end up like…Fergus.” Her breath heaved, the tears
held back by her crumbling determination. Caitlin clenched her
hands as a few strands of her hair lifted and fell, her element
threatening to explode in a hurricane of emotions.

“
Whoa, what are you talking
about?”

“
Fergus…took my element.
Not like the crystal. Katerina channeled some of my power. The
charm Fergus used stole a part of me. And not long after, he went
insane. Batshit certifiable. He’s searching for a book that he
believes will allow him to take all four elements and become
‘whole.’ There were other elementals, two I know of, probably more,
that he killed because he thought they might have the book.
One…God…one I helped with—I had no choice. You have to believe me!”
The air swirled around her, knocking over picture frames, sending a
vase crashing to the hardwood floor in an explosion of
glass.

Mara scrambled over the coffee table
and wrapped her arms around Caitlin. A rush of her element escaped,
the gossamer between the two of them strengthening, pulling them
closer, bonding them together.

Her thoughts fired in staccato bursts:
Fergus, the charm that linked them, his rantings…a young,
unsuspecting fire elemental, the old woman she’d helped torture,
Cade, Mara bound in that old hotel room, dying. The tears she’d
held in escaped in a waterfall. “I…killed…people.
Hurt…you…Cade…”

“
Shh. I know.” The
understanding in Mara’s voice sent her further into a deep pit of
self-pity. She didn’t know how to climb out. Until Mara threw her a
rope. “I killed my own sister. I live with that pain every day. I
watched the light leave her eyes, felt her essence wither. I still
hear her in my dreams. I will never be the same again. Cade and
I…we’ve spent months healing, and still…we both struggle with what
happened. What we went through. I don’t believe the pain of taking
another’s life ever goes away. But what matters to me now is what
you’re going to do next.”

Surprise choked back another sob, and
Caitlin lifted her head, wiping away the tears coating her cheeks.
“I don’t understand.”

“
You’re here. I assume you
watched to make sure Cade left, but there are at least three
werewolves next door who don’t like you very much. Which means
you’re brave. A hell of a lot braver than Bella. So what will you
do now? Why did you come? If you wanted to warn me or apologize, a
phone call or a letter would have been enough. But you’re sitting
in my living room. Why?”

Caitlin sniffled, sure of what she had
to do, but terrified of her next words. “I have to stop Fergus. And
to do that, I have to break the charm that holds us together. But I
don’t know how. The only elementals I know live in Phoenix, and
they don’t like me much. You know the community in Oregon. Give me
a name. Smooth the way for me. If I can break the charm, I can go
to Ireland, find Fergus, and stop him. He’s a danger to every
elemental in the world. If he finds out how to absorb all four
elements, there’s no telling what he’ll do.”

“
You’re going to kill him,
aren’t you?” Mara cupped Caitlin’s hand between both of hers, her
bright green eyes wide. “Please, don’t. Liam—“

Caitlin snatched her hand away. “Liam
needs to forget me. I ran eleven years ago because Fergus beat the
crap out of a man I smiled at once. What will he do if he finds the
man I…loved? When he caught me again after I left Liam in Dublin,
he broke me. I killed myself, or tried to, because I knew he’d
force me to reveal Liam’s name. Katerina’s charm—I accepted her
thrall willingly—protected me, hid me from Fergus and my own
terrible memories.

“
I’m begging you. I don’t
know why you’d ever help me, but I have to ask. If I find a way to
separate the elements, I’ll get word so you can escape the darkness
that’s coming. I don’t expect to survive Fergus. He’ll hurt me.
He’ll wear me down until I can’t resist, until there’s nothing of
Caitlin left. But maybe…I’ll hang on long enough to stop him. If I
can do that, the pain, everything I’ve been through, will have
meaning. But you have to protect Liam. Whatever happens, don’t let
him come after me. Fergus will destroy him.”

“
How do you propose I do
that? If you haven’t noticed, he’s pretty far gone over you, and a
werewolf in love…there’s no force in the universe strong enough to
fight that. Let him help you. Believe me, I don’t want him in
danger. I don’t want any of us in danger. But Cade and I
together…we’re stronger than either of us is apart. Maybe with Liam
at your side, defeating Fergus—“

“
No. I won’t let him risk
his life for me. Not after everything I’ve done. He belongs here
with his—your—pack.”

Mara rose, retrieved a pad of paper
and a pen from the kitchen, and wrote for a minute. “Call Eleanor
and give her my name. If you know what’s good for you, don’t
mention the name Bella. Ever. You’re Caitlin and always have
been.”

“
Thank you.”

“
I wish you’d reconsider
talking to Liam.” Mara held onto Caitlin’s hand, her cool fingers
surprisingly strong.

“
Fergus knows I’m alive. I
feel him, here.” Caitlin ground her fist against her breast. “I’m
sure he feels me, too. Without the protection of Katerina’s thrall,
he’ll find a way to hurt me. Soon. Flying terrifies him, but he has
enough of my element to manage it. I have to run.” Caitlin pressed
a folded slip of paper into Mara’s hand. “Give this to Liam
tomorrow. And…one day, when he’s ready, tell him I lied.” With a
stifled sob, she bolted for the door. Mara called after her, but
with her element at her back, she escaped into the fresh air of the
morning.

Chapter Nine

The morning passed on autopilot.
Caitlin answered calls, returned emails, and booked packages to
exotic and romantic locales for customers, all between searching
for flights to Ireland. Even with her frugality over the past few
months and the nest egg she’d socked away from working at
Katerina’s occult shop, Flaming Objects, the ticket would max out
her credit card. Once she met with the elementals in Oregon, she’d
have to compel an airport ticket agent to book her a flight for
free. Lying, cheating, and stealing didn’t sit well with her, but
if she didn’t stop Fergus, the death and destruction he’d bring
down on the world—and possibly Liam—would be worse than any of her
sins. Except for…no. She couldn’t dwell on those she’d hurt now.
Not the poor teenage girl, nor the old woman. Now she had to
act.

The charred hole around her heart
burned anew. Did Fergus feel the same pain? In all the time they’d
spent together, she’d never asked. Too frightened to risk his
anger, she’d barely spoken to him. Trapped for months at a time
between his frequent disappearing acts, she’d cooked their meals,
cleaned, worked in the local woolen shop when they’d needed money,
and squirreled away a few euros here or there under the floorboards
in case she ever got the chance to run.

The memory of her last day in Dublin
brought her some comfort. He’d called to her then, used her own
element to compel her to him. The crushing weight of the call had
stolen her breath, and though she sensed him now, knew he lived,
somewhere, the distance between them kept her safe.

The note she’d left for Liam worried
her. She should have waited. Mailed it. If Liam read her words
before she left town, he might try to stop her. Glancing at her
watch, she blew out a breath. If she left now, she could be in
Oregon by dusk. With a quick charm, she convinced her boss to
request an electronic transfer of her final paycheck and then
headed for the apartment. She’d take five minutes—just long enough
to retrieve her bags, cleanse the space, and walk through one final
time, and she’d disappear.

***

Rain battered the hood of her jacket
as she raced from the bus stop to her apartment building. Her
supposedly waterproof boots sloshed, and her cross-body bag dripped
onto the well-worn carpet. Head down, she smacked right into a
steaming brick wall and yelped when a strong arm steadied
her.

“
Easy, luv. I’ve got
ya.”

Oh God. Why? The gentle words warred
with the harshness of his tone, and she stared up into his moss and
amber eyes, hard and unforgiving.

“
Let me go.”

He took a step back and let her pass,
waited until she’d unlocked her door to speak again. “Do ya think
I’m a proper idiot?”

Of all the questions he could have
asked, she hadn’t expected that one. “No.”

“
Then why,” he said,
thrusting the crumpled note at her, “did ya expect me to believe
this?”

“
Because it’s the truth. I
don’t love you, Liam. I didn’t then, and I certainly don’t now. We
had some fun together, I’ll give you that, but there’s nothing
between us.”

“
Ye’re lying.”

“
What? No.” She slipped
inside her apartment and tried to shut the door in his face. It
caught on his work boot, the steel toe blocking the only way she
knew to protect him.

“
Prove it.”

“
There’s nothing I could
possibly say that would prove how I don’t feel about
you.”

“
Say? No. Let me kiss ya.”
The corners of his lips twitched—those firm lips that had
worshipped her neck, her breasts, and between her thighs. The nub
of her sex throbbed, and she stifled a moan.

“
Get out.”

“
If there’s nothing between
us, then ya should be able to kiss me goodbye, yeah? One last
kindness.” The amused glint to his eyes had her clenching her fists
at her sides. Maddening. Fine. He wanted a kiss, he’d get a kiss.
And…she’d have something to remember him by once she shut the door
in his face. She could hold back the tears for a single
kiss.

She tilted her face up and let the
door fall open. “Come here, then.”

Liam trailed a knuckle down her cheek,
along her jaw, and under her chin. “Ye’re the only woman I ever
loved, Caitlin.” His breath heated her lips. His hand pressed
lightly against her low back, and a desperate whimper threatened to
escape her throat.

No, stay
strong.

He twisted a damp lock of hair around
his finger and tucked the curl behind her ear. The skin on the back
of her neck prickled. Arousal flooded her, and he grinned. Damn
werewolves and their keen noses.

“
Breathe,” he whispered.
She’d stopped, his spicy scent weaving a snare she couldn’t escape.
His eyelashes tickled her neck when he dipped his head to nuzzle
the spot below her ear she’d forgotten he loved once. His teeth
nipped at her ear lobe.

“
Liam…” She couldn’t keep
her hands still and wrapped her fingers around the lapels of his
flannel work shirt.

“
I love hearin’ ya say my
name.” His hard length pressed against her hip—or perhaps she’d
pressed her hip against him. Did it matter? God, she’d loved him
once. Could love him again. If only…

“
Do ya want this?” he
asked, his lips barely skimming the corner of her mouth.

With all her heart, but Fergus’s
threat loomed. If she walked away, she’d have his memory. If she
let him stay, Fergus would kill him.

“
I can’t…”

“
That’s not an answer.” He
pulled back to meet her gaze, the sudden chill against her skin a
physical blow. “Why would ya run, Caitlin? Answer me.”

The loss of his touch, his lips, left
an ache no one but Liam could fill. “To save you.”

“
I don’t need
saving.”

“
You don’t know him.”
Caitlin turned and stalked into the apartment. Chilled to the bone,
she clenched her hands to stop them from shaking. “Fergus Tharp is
a crazy bastard who thinks that he owns me. And…he
does.”

Liam growled, but Caitlin held up her
hand. “He stole my element. Convinced me he loved me so I’d let him
work a charm he knew would destroy me. I can’t fight him. All he
has to do is turn my element against me, and I’m powerless. He’s
fucking huge—bigger than you, even, and he doesn’t give a crap who
he hurts to get what he wants. So, yes. If he finds you, you will
need saving.”

“
And ye’re going off to
face him alone. Shite, Caitlin, how the hell do ya expect to
survive him?”

Her answer hung in the air. Icy
droplets of rain snaked down her collar, between her
breasts.

“
Fuck me.” Realization
clouded his gaze. “Ya don’t.”

Shame bowed her head. “I killed myself
eleven years ago. When that failed, I destroyed Caitlin in
Mexico—with Katerina’s help. I never expected to be myself again.
If I die now, at least my death will have meaning. And I had one
more night with you.

“
Mo chuisle, mo
chroí,”
she whispered, and Liam’s eyes
widened. “I know what it means now. I remember. I loved you. I died
to protect you. And I’ll do it again.”

“
The hell ya
will.”

She wanted him to yell and scream, to
use his fists like Fergus always had. She understood violence,
rage. But his quiet determination spoke of care and need and…
love.