Access Granted (20 page)

Chapter Forty

Sabrina wasn’t prepared for the sudden feeling of Zander’s thick tongue as he licked at her vagina. He drew her clit into his hot mouth sucking at it like it was his favorite hard candy. She tried to shove him away with her hands, but he growled deep in his throat holding her thighs even tighter. So she dropped her hands back down at her sides getting completely lost in the sheer mind blowing pleasure filled bliss Zander had shooting through her body.

It was out of this world. For months, she dreamt about Zander’s practiced skills at love making being used on her body, but the way he was administrating it tonight was out of the realm of reason.

She could tell he’d had lovers in the past, but none of that mattered now. What he was doing to her was for her alone and no one else. He continued to flick his talented tongue against her. She was dying to have him. All of this touching and pushing her to the edge had to stop.

God, it was becoming more than she could stand. Her body felt so tight like it was going to blow at any given second and Zander wasn’t stopping, but kept pushing, teasing and driving her crazy.

Gasping, she tried to escape by wiggling her hips, but Zander’s head popped from between her legs. His gaze clashed with her and then her eyes shot down to his fangs; the sight of them had her blood racing even faster.

“Stop trying to get away from me. I’m no where near finished with you yet, beautiful. Do you understand me?” His eyes narrowed into stormy gray slits as he stared up at her waiting.

“I understand.”

The words were barely out of her mouth before Zander’s mouth was on her again licking and sucking devouring her body like he was on death row and she was his last requested meal.

Sabrina screamed as her orgasm raked through her sending what was left of her over the edge. In the back of her mind, she felt the slight sting on the inside of her thigh as Zander bit her, but she was too far gone to care. As her body slowly came back down, she heard Zander calling to her. Opening her eyes, she blinked a few times to focus on him standing at side of the bed.

“You are mine,” he told her as he stripped out of his clothes. He shoved his pants down his legs and kicked them away, then whipped his shirt over his head seconds later.

She didn’t have time to take in the sight of Zander’s hard well-defined body because her eyes instantly zoomed in on his long, thick cock pointed straight at her. Sabrina opened her mouth to comment, but he quickly covered her body was his and kissed her.

The taste of her own blood totally got blocked out as Zander eased the thick mushroom head of his cock inside of her. She flinched as he pushed deeper until he hit her barrier. He gave her a few hot, searing kisses before he lifted his head.

“Sabrina, you are so amazingly tight. I swear you are like a perfect fit for me,” he praised, kissing the side of her neck. “Baby, I promise to make this good for you.” Seconds later, he thrust deep until he was buried to the hilt.

“Oh God,” she cried as she felt Zander take her fully for the first time. She pressed her hands against his shoulder and tried to push his weight off of her.

“Shhh...it’s okay,” he whispered. His calloused hands held on to her hips as he slipped out of her and then plunged back into her as sweat covered their bodies. “Try to forget the pain and just
feel
how good this is. We fit together like a perfect puzzle pieces.”

Sabrina tried to keep her wits about her and not get lost in how good her body felt with Zander, but the way he was pushing her was slowly beginning to make her lose her limits. “Yes...Zander...God, Yes,” she screamed, fighting to regain some sort of control.

“Mine... All mine...Fuck!” Zander hollered. “I’m never going to let you go.”

Lifting her legs, he pushed her knees against her chest as he continued to thrust into her pushing them further over the edge of no return. The new position was incredible and sent her into another orgasm before she had a chance to recover from her first one.

She didn’t know what to do since Zander was the one in control over her body, but she loved it. Sabrina knew this was how she wanted to spent the rest of her life Zander.

“Tell me you accept me,” he growled continuing to pump into her. “You will embrace your birthright to be a
Unique
woman. You want my bite now and for the rest of our lives.”

“Yes, I accept all of it,” Sabrina screamed without one ounce of hesitation. She almost didn’t hear him through her sexual haze he had wrapped around them.

“Finally,” Zander shouted before he lowered his mouth, placed it against the side of her neck and bit her for a second time that night. He pumped into her faster, deeper and harder until he felt like they were one person. Just remembering the words of acceptance was enough to make him fight even harder to win her heart.

His orgasm shook him as the sweet taste of his mate’s blood filled his mouth. The sheer force of it almost caused him to black out but he caught himself in the nick of time. Tiny shock waves tingled down the base of his spine. Easing his fangs out of her neck, Zander licked the tiny puncture holes with his tongue to make the small wounds heal faster.

For a while, neither one of them moved nor spoke a word. All they could do was wait to come back down from the mind bending rollercoaster ride. Both of them had just gone on without a safety latch to hold their bodies in from falling out.

Chapter Forty-One

Zander rested his face against the crook of his mate’s neck and drew in a deep breath getting lost in her sweet and alluring scent.
Yes...Yes...God...Yes
. After months and months of waiting, his much earned patience got rewarded and now Sabrina’s warm, soft body was beneath his.

Raising his head, Zander looked down into her face noticing how her eyes were still a little glazed over with passion and he couldn’t help but feel smug. He rocked his mate’s world, something no other man would ever do.

He brushed his thumb over her jaw loving the smoothness of her skin. “Sabrina, how are you doing? Are you okay, sweetheart?”

“I’m good,” she answered, glancing down at his chin instead of into his face.

He couldn’t believe Sabrina was still so shy of him after what they’d just experienced in each other’s arms. “Darling, look at me.”

Slowly, she raised her eyes and looked at him.  He smiled at Sabrina hoping to ease her nerves and seconds later she returned it. God, he loved her so much. He was almost the happiest man in the world. All he had to do now what get her to admit that she loved him and everything would be on its way to being perfect.

“Zander, you’re getting heavy.” Placing her hand on his shoulder, Sabrina gave him a tiny push.

“Oh, baby. I’m so sorry. I wasn’t trying to suffocate you.” Lifting his body off hers, he pulled out of his mate and lay down next to her on the bed.

Without wasting a moment, he pulled Sabrina back against his chest, covered them with a sheet before wrapping his arm around her waist holding her in place. “You know this means you belong to me now,” he informed her. “I won’t ever let you go.”

“Zander, you can’t stake a claim to me,” Sabrina gasped. “I’m a person, not a piece of property.”

“I’m not staking a claim to you,” he corrected, “but you need to know the truth. We’ve made love which makes our bond closer, tighter and most importantly more intense.”

“I have a question for you.” Turning her body so they were facing each other, Sabrina placed her hand in the center of his chest. Her sudden touch made his pulse race She didn’t understand how much more potent her touch was to him now that her blood was mingled with his.

“Ask away,” he said, rubbing his hand up and down her side. “I’ll tell you anything you want.”

Leaning back, Sabrina stared up at him with such trust in her eyes. How could he not give her anything that she wanted in life?  “What did Sahara mean when she said you had more to tell me? Is there really something else you’re keeping from me? I mean isn’t the being a vampire along with your mind reading abilities more than enough? I can’t imagine what else you’re holding back.”

Zander ran his hand up and down Sabrina’s hip wondering where he should start with all of his confessions before he informed her about the sleep of the dead. Some things in his past were so deeply buried that even Jax and Thorsten didn’t even know about them.

When he was younger and wanted to experience life without his older brother barking out orders at him he had left home and tried living a normal life as possible with humans. He couldn’t lose Sabrina for the mistakes of his past, but he wouldn’t keep that part of him a secret from her anymore. She had a right to know about his last hundred years.

Zander wanted his mate to know how much he cared about her and their relationship before he told her about anything else.  “Sahara was right,” he confessed, softly. “I have been keeping something from you. Baby, you know how much I adore you. I have never felt this way about another woman.”

“I know,” Sabrina said, looking up at him. “I think it’s one of the reasons that’s kept me from telling you something for so long.”

Frowning, he removed his hand from her hip brushing it over her shoulder. “I’m not following you. What have you been afraid to tell me? You have to know that I’ll support you no matter what unless it involves you trying to date another one of your assholes admirers.”

“Are you crazy?’ Sabrina asked wide-eyed, sitting straight up. “How could I ever want another man after the night I just spent with the man I love? I mean this was the best night of my life and it happened with you. What more could I have asked for?”

The shock of her confession hit Zander full force. Finally, it happened. Sabrina admitted she loved him He continued to stare at her speechless with complete surprise on his face.

Zander felt wonderfully, blissfully happy and fully alive.  He didn’t want to take away any of the thrill he was feeling right now, but he did wonder could she still be experiencing the highs of her first real orgasm. He wasn’t sure if she knew the difference lust and love. Zander decided to hold out until later before he dived into his mate’s slip of the tongue.

He was pretty sure Sabrina wasn’t even aware of anything she just told him.  She had shared the deepest part of herself with him tonight. He couldn’t run out and shout it to the world until he was positive Sabrina truly felt those three little words deep down in her soul.

“Come here,” he said and patted the spot where she had been lying down next to him. “Let me finish what I was about to tell you.”

Sabrina laid back down snuggling closer to his body. “I have never felt so connected to another person as I do right now, but I would even feel a more of a part of you if you tell me what has gotten you so wound up all of the sudden. I know it’s something. I can feel it.”

Zander debated if he should jump in feet first or build up to it. He finally decided to dive right on in. “When I first heard about my mate, I never once doubted you were out there waiting for me. I couldn’t wait until I found you and made you mine, but I did some things,” he admitted. “One thing in particular I’m not very fond of and I haven’t told anybody about it until now.”

“What sort of things?” Sabrina frowned, looking at him uncertainly. “You’re just so perfect like what you see is what you get. I can’t see you doing anything wrong.”

“I never said I was perfect or ever tried to make anyone believe that about me. I have my flaws,” he said. “I didn’t know how long it would take me to find you. I hoped somehow you would just come into my life on your own. So, I found ways to make the time past faster and now I’m not proud of it.”

Nervously, Sabrina moistened her lips as she continued to watch him with a bewildered expression. “Zander, you’re killing me. Please, tell me what you did.”

“I slept with other women over the years. Now, I don’t have a long list of them like my cousin Thorsten or even Jax, but I had my fair share and I don’t want you─”

Sabrina burst out laughing as she moved away from his body. Her laughter was deep, warm and rich, but he wondered what she found so funny.  He was trying to be serious and she wouldn’t let him. This wasn’t going as he had planned. He had to get their conversation back on track.

“Why are you laughing at me?” he asked. “I’m trying to tell you something here.”

“Honey, I never thought you were a virgin. I mean, if you were one and could make love with such skill and intensity, then you should give a seminar or teach a how-to class. You shouldn’t keep those secrets to yourself.”

He threw his head back and roared with laughter. “Thank you for the compliment, but I think I’ll keep all of those secrets to myself. I can’t let anyone else know how I love my woman.”

Snuggling closer, Sabrina kissed him. “I like being your woman, and when you bit me earlier it didn’t feel all that bad. Actually, I loved it more than I thought I would.”

Why did she have to tell him that now
?

Zander wished Sabrina had let him finished before confessing that to him, but he needed to continue for them to have a future together. “I wasn’t going to tell you I was a virgin,” he said. “It was something else entirely.”

“Okay, why don’t you finish.”

“Like I said, I had dated a lot of women but there was one in particular I had fallen really hard for.  The first time I saw her I knew I had to get to know her better. Something about her just called to me and wouldn’t let go until I at least learned her name. Whitney Harley always had an up beat personality. Nothing ever got her down. She just loved life more than anyone I had ever met in my life.  We started talking and six months later we were engaged.”

“Are you telling me that you’re married?” Sabrina asked, rising up, but he pushed her back down.

“No, I’m not. Everything was going perfectly until the day of the wedding and then reality set in swift and fast. I realized what a mistake I would be making by not marrying my
Unique
woman, so I left her,” he continued. “I didn’t leave a note or anything. I just packed my bags and left without ever looking back. I could never tell anyone else about this because I’m the good guy, the level-headed one in the family. I don’t go around breaking women’s hearts.”

“I can’t believe you just left her without so much as a good bye or anything. How could you do something like that? It’s so mean and cruel.” Easing away from his body, Sabrina sat up on the bed looking at him like she had never seen him before in her life.

“Don’t you understand? I did the right thing for her,” he said. “I was only marrying her out of loneliness because I hadn’t found you yet. But, Whitney loved me and wanted to build a future with me which I couldn’t have done with her. She would have wondered why she was getting older but I wasn’t. I couldn’t tell her my secret because my undying love for her wasn’t there. Why break her heart face to face? It was better the way I did it.”

“So, you’re seriously trying to tell me my birthmark makes me so special that you would never do something like that to me? It’s just a rose and nothing else.”

“You’re wrong. A rose is the perfect symbol of love. Something about the petals, scent and fiery color represents all things sensual and sacred. A romantic purity I thought about every time I looked at you. A symbol of desire that I never wanted to deny or have taken away; it’s the eternal life I want to experience with you.”

Zander hoped Sabrina understood what he was telling her. He never thought about those things with Whitney. He would have done her more harm than good if he’d stayed with her. She deserved a human male she could grow old with as the years past.

“Do you forgive me? I never intended on hurting any other women while I waited for you to come into my life. I shouldn’t have led her on as long as I did, but I didn’t go through with it in the end and saved Whitney a lot of heartbreak.” Wrapping his hand around Sabrina’s arm, he pulled her back across the bed. He hated anytime there was any kind of distance between them.

“Did you ever go back and see how she was doing?” Sabrina asked.

He shook his head. “No, I wanted a clean break and if she had gotten over me, I knew seeing me again would only bring back up bad memories. I wouldn’t do that do her. Besides, it was
so
many years ago. Way before your parents and even grandparents were born, but I felt I had to tell you about this for us to be together.”

“How old are you?”

“Why don’t you tell me how old you think I look?”

“Forty,” Sabrina answered.

Grinning, Zander shook his head. “I’m over two hundred years old.”

“Oh my God,” she whispered, touching his face. “If you had told me all of this when we first met each other, I would have run from you without ever looking back. Your intensity used to scare the hell out of me. You had this way about you that constantly demanded attention. I wondered would I be woman enough to keep up with your wants and needs.”

“Sweetheart, I never once doubted that you would be woman enough for me. But, can you look past what I have done to be with me?”

“Zander, I can’t be upset about something that happened way before I was born. You have a past just like everyone else in the world. I’m not going to hold it against you. I...I love you too much for that.”

His heart leaped in his chest again at those three little words. “Baby, are you sure? You aren’t just telling me this because you think I need to hear the words?”

“No, I fell in love with you way before tonight,” Sabrina confessed. “I believe it has always been there deep inside of me, but I fought off the signs on purpose just to be difficult. Avery even called me on it a few times, but I told him I only thought of you as a friend. Besides, I didn’t want to give up a part of myself to be with you.”

“Do you think you’re ready for me to change you? I can do it tonight if you want. Everything will be perfect.”

“Turn me.” Swallowing hard, Sabrina held the sheet tighter against her chest. “Can’t I think about that some more? I’m trying here Zander, but I still don’t know about the living forever part.”

The sleep of the dead still could happen to him. He didn’t want to fear it but he wasn’t sure how long Sabrina would need to get over that last hurdle in her head. She had come so far in such a short period of time and he didn’t want to push too hard, so he would wait a little longer.

“Okay, we don’t have to talk about it anymore tonight. How about we get some sleep?”

Zander laid back down pulling Sabrina with him. He planted a kiss on the top of her head and he held her against his heart. He couldn’t accept they had gotten this far and the most important thing he needed from her still wouldn’t happen.

“Zander, I love you,” Sabrina whispered.

“I love you too, sweetheart.”

However, secretly Zander wondered would Sabrina’s love for him be strong enough to accept leaving her human life behind and living eternity with him. Or did she cherish the world she lived in more and never would be able to accept his fully?