Alexandr's Cherished Submissive (13 page)

“I do not want our world to touch hers yet.”

Dimitri’s gaze went to Jessica’s hand entwined with Alex’s. “You know she will find out eventually. Would be best if you are honest with her if you truly want a future with this girl.”

“Be honest and tell her what? That I’ve killed dozens of men? That I run drugs, guns, and just about everything else illegal for a criminal organization? That her uncle who she loves, is equally corrupt? How exactly would I do that without destroying any chance with her?”

Instead of being upset, Dimitri shrugged. “Don’t ask me. I only fuck whores. I don’t have to explain myself to them. Look, you haven’t even slept with her yet. Maybe she is terrible in bed or will only do vanilla sex. I say fuck her, find out if she can handle our lifestyle, and—if she can—marry her, and have a dozen babies.”

“It is more complicated than that.”

Dimitri set his empty plate down with a sigh. “Then don’t fuck her. Either way, stop whining like a little bitch about it and do something.”

“Fuck you.”

Grinning, Dimitri switched to English. “Sweet Jessica, you like vodka?”

Five hours later, Alex had a very drunk Jessica sitting next to him, fucking
gossiping
with his little brother about sex. She was talking to Dimitri like they’d been friends for years, laughing over the same crude humor, turning a normally dour and depressing evening into something else entirely. She giggled into her cupped hands, her sparkling blue eyes meeting his as Dimitri told her about the time he’d been caught by a girl’s father sneaking out of her bedroom when he was sixteen. Normally, he would have been laughing as well, but his mind was stills stuck on Jessica describing the time she got caught skinny dipping with her high school boyfriend in his pool by his parents.

Jessica slumped against him as she fell back, laughing so hard tears were trailing down her face while Dimitri told an elaborate story about trying to run and put his pants on at the same time while an angry father chased him with a butcher knife, threatening to unman him. He loved seeing her like this, happy and full of life. Being around her made him happy, and not only him, but his men as well. They all enjoyed spending time with the bright and kind young woman. Her silken hair brushed over the edge of his chin, sending a tingle along his body.

“Tell me, Jessica,” Dimitri said with a leer. “What is the wildest thing you have ever done?”

All Alex’s efforts to remain unaffected were blown to smithereens when Jessica confessed to having made out heavily with a girl. She’d whispered a short story about the girls being drunk together after a concert, how she’d danced with her friend and then made out with her while they were dancing with everyone at the party watching them and cheering them on. Dimitri’s eyes were so wide it was comical, and Jessica’s gleeful snort of laughter made Alex grin even as his dick ached.

“You should see your face.” Jessica heaved in a breath, but remained relaxed against him. “I thought there was no way I could shock you.”

Chuckling, Alex couldn’t stop himself from smoothing his fingers over her cheek on the pretense of tucking her hair behind her ear. “It is because you are so innocent looking.”

Dimitri cleared his throat and gave Alex a pointed look. “You like people watching you?”

Her slight weight pressed into Alex as she rested against him. “I do. Not, like, all the time or anything super crazy, but knowing that someone is getting off on what I’m doing? It’s hot.”

“Is hot,” Dimitri agreed with a shit-eating grin thrown at Alex. His younger brother was a voyeur and loved to watch people fuck, and he knew Alex was both a voyeur and an exhibitionist. “Very hot. I did not know American women were so…kinky? Is right word?”

“Yeah, kinky is the right word.” She snorted a laugh again while Alex grappled with his intense fantasies of fucking her at his home BDSM club in Moscow. “I don’t know how things are where you’re from, but most of my friends aren’t as hung up on sex as our parents. And we don’t slut shame each other.”

“Slut shame?”

“Yeah, how if a guy has a one night stand, it’s okay, but if a girl does, she’s a slut. I don’t believe in that shit. If you’re both consenting adults, get your freak on. That said, I can’t abide cheating. Ever. If a guy bullshits the girl and tells her that if she has sex with him it’ll be with the intent of forming a relationship…”—she rubbed her eyes and yawned—“then he’s a manwhore, and I can’t stand men like that. I would never, ever cheat on a man, and I expect the same from him.”

Dimitri looked up at Alex, winked, and said in Russian, “You lucky, lucky son of a bitch. If you don’t want her, I’ll marry her tomorrow. Sweet, kinky, loyal, and she can cook.”

A sour tang of unusual jealousy made Alex’s gut clench, and he slipped a possessive arm around Jessica before responding back in Russian, “Stay away from her.”

Instead of cowering from Alex’s anger as most men would, Dimitri wiggled his eyebrows. “Aww, come on. You heard her, one of her fantasies is two men at once…and another couple. Imagine watching Jessica eat another woman’s pussy while you fuck her. Like I said, you lucky son of a bitch.”

Shaking his head, Alex couldn’t help but laugh even as he wanted to yell at his brother to stop thinking about Jessica like that. Dimitri was too charming for his own good, but Alex liked to see his brother happy like this, especially tonight. What was normally an evening spent drinking until they passed out had instead become one of the best nights Alex could remember having in a long time.

Jessica turned in his arms, then glanced up at him, and smiled, her beauty devouring his heart. She reached up and traced his lips with her fingertip, the velvety rasp of her skin against his lips making his cock throb. When her eyes crinkled as she giggled over something, he sighed, knowing she was going to feel like shit in the morning. Funny that it was usually him and Dimitri who passed out drunk on this grim anniversary. Instead, for the first time in many years, they were a little buzzed, but not smashed into an alcohol-fueled oblivion.

“Alex,” Jessica murmured while petting his goatee. “Did you know, when you talk in Russian, it makes me wet?”

Dimitri choked on his Scotch.

Alex blinked down at her, wondering what the hell he was getting himself into. “My voice makes your pussy wet?”

She nodded slowly, her eyelids growing heavy. With a sleepy grumble, she moved until she was curled up in his lap, her body resting heavily enough against his that he realized she would pass out soon. Then she nuzzled her face against his throat, her nose and lips brushing his skin and leaving a burning path of sparks everywhere they touched.

“You smell so good. I want to rub myself all over you so I can smell you on me.” His skin beneath her lips grew sensitive, and the heat of her breath tested the limits of his self-control. Her husky voice was the distilled essence of debauchery as she whispered, “Wanna to know a secret?”

“
Da
. I mean yes.”

“I think you’re the most amazing man I’ve ever met, and I want you so damn bad, dream about you constantly, but you don’t want me and that sucks.”

His heart gave an odd thump, and his chest actually hurt. Knowing she probably wouldn’t remember their conversation tomorrow, he brushed her hair back from her face. Her smile was beautiful, but sleepy, as she beamed at him. “I tell you secret. I do want you.”

All too aware of Dimitri watching them closely, his expression unexpectedly grave, Alex had to keep his gaze on Jessica as she blinked slowly up at him. “Then why don’t you take me?”

“
Prinsessa moya
, you deserve better than me.”

“But I don’t want better. I want you.”

“I cannot have you.”

“But don’t you understand? You could if you wanted me as badly as I want you. I’d be so happy to be your girlfriend, Alex, even though I know you don’t do girlfriends, only fuck buddies.” Her voice slurred as she weakly thumped him on the shoulder. “Hell, I’d be happy just to be your fuck buddy. You’d be my own personal sex toy.”

Ignoring Dimitri’s laughter, he shook his head. “You are drunk, would not be right.”

She leaned up and gave him a somewhat sloppy kiss on the cheek. “See, always an excuse. If you really wanted me, you wouldn’t let anything stop you.”

Alex sighed then placed a long kiss on Jessica’s forehead, relishing the feel of her in his arms. He pulled back, and she smiled, her lips eventually softening into a lush, pink bow. Her eyes closed, and she rubbed her cheek against his chest like an affectionate cat. Staring at her plump lips, he imagined how they would feel against his. He wondered how she would kiss, what she would like, and how she tasted.

Dimitri gave a sarcastic sigh. “You are screwed.”

“What?” Alex whispered, not wanting to wake Jessica. She was so cuddled into him there wasn’t a part of her body that wasn’t pressed against his. The urge to sleep with her gripped him, and he gritted his teeth. That could potentially be very bad, but he was finding it hard to give a shit about what he shouldn’t do anymore. Especially when she was begging for him and he wanted to give in to her so badly.

The need to take her had almost overwhelmed him, but he was not sure he could keep her safe yet. The Novikov curse had ravaged his family for two generations, and it would take more than a few weeks to make sure the curse would never touch Jessica. Then again, he and Dimitri had made great strides with the Boldin family, agreeing to leave each other’s women alone despite their shared bloody past. Hell, the head of the Boldin
Bratva
had two daughters and a wife. Why shouldn’t he and Dimitri have the same chance at happiness? Having her in his arms, sleeping against him, had to be one of the best feelings he’d ever experienced. He could only imagine how wonderful it would feel to have it every night for the rest of his life.

He was turned from his deep thoughts by Jessica snoring lightly. The sound was so…dainty that it made him laugh. “She even snores cute.”

Dimitri raised a brow as Alex stood with Jessica cradled against him. “I am taking her to bed.”

“To her apartment?”

He didn’t hesitate when he said, “No, to my room.”

Giving him a shit-eating grin, Dimitri sat back and tilted his chin up, “Lucky bastard.”

Alex resisted the urge to roll his eyes before he started back to his room with Jessica held against him. He honestly did not want to touch her when she was this drunk. First, because he didn’t want her to use alcohol as an excuse to push him away. Second, because he wanted her in the right frame of mind when he told her how things were going to be from now on. Third, because he would never want to have sex for the first time with a wasted woman. Not that he had any problem screwing a woman when she was really drunk. If that’s what she liked, he was more than happy to oblige. Drunk sex was fun, but not when they hadn’t spoken of it sober and made plans.

He nudged the door open then turned on the light switch with his elbow. The dim room was illuminated by golden sconces, giving the cozy space a warm glow, and the hunter green accents complemented the dark wood of his dresser and massive bed. As he lowered her to the bed, he couldn’t help but notice the freckles on the bridge of her nose and dusting the tops of her high cheekbones. He could have stood there and watched her forever, but he forced himself to move away and close the thick, white velvet curtains.

After using the bathroom, he came back out with a wet washcloth and placed it on the back of Jessica’s neck, waking her up.

He dodged her attempts to smack him away. “Can you use bathroom on own or do you need me to help you?”

She muttered something, then pushed off the bed, and staggered into the bathroom. Evidently, she was awake enough to take care of business and wash up, because when she zigzagged back to bed, she flopped onto his pillow and mumbled, “Used your toothbrush. Don’t have cooties. Need water.”

Laughing to himself, he did as she asked and added a couple ibuprofen to the mix. He helped her sit up enough to drink. She pushed him back when he was done. “Close your eyes.”

“What?”

She didn’t wait for him to comply, instead falling on her back while clumsily kicking off her shoes, sending them sailing across the room, one almost hitting him in the head. Before he knew it, she’d slipped out of her khakis, leaving him staring at her tiny, pale yellow panties. They looked like cotton and had pink bows at the hips. He’d seen far sexier underwear in his life, but damned if his dick wasn’t twitching at the erotic temptation of the high cut panties against her creamy skin. A moment later, she started fidgeting then managed to take her bra off without removing her shirt. Once this was done, she let out a long sigh and curled up on his bed, her long legs spread out, revealing the slit of her pussy covered by yellow cotton fabric. She grabbed a pillow and cuddled it close, frowning in irritation as she tried unsuccessfully to reach the comforter to pull it up.

With a sigh, he lifted the thick down comforter over her then smoothed her hair back from her face. She captivated him, and he looked forward to spending many hours just watching her. The complex feelings he had for her were sometimes so intense he was afraid to give them a name. One thing was certain, she would soon be his and only his.

Every delicate inch of her.

He fought his arousal at the thought of owning her in every way, of her wearing his collar and his ring, even as he scolded himself for moving too fast. Shit. It was those sweet, cotton panties. They killed him. Made him want to defile her in the worst way. His dick, not used to being denied a woman’s touch for this long, twitched at the thought of sucking her arousal from the crotch of her panties.

Shit.

After turning off the lights and making sure his gun was easily accessible, but not easily seen, he changed into a pair of sleep pants and got into his bed with a smile. She rolled closer to him, gravity pulling her body against his. Once she pressed against him, he almost held his breath, unsure for once of what he should do. If she was any other woman, he’d be fucking her by now, but Jessica’s trust was something he would cherish, not violate. He rolled onto his back and moved her so that her head was resting on his chest, her long, smooth legs tangling with his. Her fresh scent teased him, and his cock was so hard it ached, but he did nothing to relieve himself.