All Good Things Exposed (5 page)

"But…it's just so degrading."

"That's societies influence on your mind talking, Olivia." Jace pushed himself up from the bed. "You don't know anything about it so don't pretend you do."

His back was to me now and he was walking away. He was walking away and my heart was pounding so hard in my chest it hurt. I felt as though it was moments away from being ripped from my flesh to pound against the immaculate marble of his floor. I couldn't let him walk away. I had to make a decision and before I knew it, I was speaking.

"I want it, Jace." He froze in place and his shoulders stiffened. "I want to be your submissive."

Chapter 4

There was no way I'd heard her right. Olivia wanted to be my submissive? She loathed that side of me. The side that craved dominance over another. Over everything. There was no way I heard her right. I had to be delusional. Maybe I was still slightly drunk from the night before. That would explain my suddenly overactive mind. There was just no way.

"What did you just say?" I felt my eyes narrow on her.

Her voice was quiet. She sounded unsure and self-conscious but her eyes were stubborn. "You heard me."

"Say it again."

"I want to be your submissive." She said strongly. Determinedly.

In two seconds flat, I closed the distance between us. I splayed my hand over her hip while the other wound around the back of her neck. I weaved my hand in her hair, pulling her head back, forcing her to look up at me. I didn't know what to feel in regards to her words. There was a part of me that was screaming for fucking joy. But, there was another part of me that was furious. Livid. Raging. How dare she want to subject herself to my wicked ways! She deserved so much more. She knew she deserved more. Surely she did? Damn it! I knew she deserved more.

"Why, Olivia?" I ground the words from between clenched teeth. In response, her body shuddered under my possessive touch.

Her eyes misted, but through the shine, I could see only steely determination. "I don't want to lose you."

Fuck. She thought she had to do this so she didn't lose me? Stupid woman! "You're not losing me, Olivia. I'm not going anywhere and neither are you."

"It's not just that." I could hear the tremors in her voice and I wanted to quell them. I needed to.

"What else is it?" I asked. I had to know.

"I want to be everything you need." She said with conviction. "I need to be everything you need. Please don't push me away. I've made up my mind. I want this."

Did she? Had she? Did she even know what she was getting herself into? Did she know what she would have to give up in order to become my submissive? Did I know what I needed from her? I'd never had a submissive I cared for the way I cared for Olivia. Of course I didn't want anything bad to happen to them, but I didn't care one iota for the emotional traumas they may suffer at my hand. But, I knew I would care for Olivia's.

"Do you know what being a submissive entails, Olivia?" I asked. I could see by the uncertainty in her eyes that she in fact, did not.

"No," her voice was shaky. "But I'm sure I could figure it out."

"It takes training." My voice was husky. I was getting turned on. I was a sick-minded fuck who should be shot. But, I couldn't bring myself to stop. "Are you prepared for that?"

"Yes."

"Are you certain?"

For a minute, she didn't move or speak or breathe and I thought maybe I'd convinced her in some weird way to run from this idea. But then she spoke. "I'm sure."

"All right." I released her and a rush of breath left her lungs.

"All right?" She questioned. "What does that mean?"

"We'll begin as I usually begin." I stated factually. "There are grounds we need to establish, Olivia, before we jump into this."

"What grounds?"

"I need to know what you can and cannot handle." I walked into the closet, leaving her standing naked in my room before snatching a white satin housecoat I'd purchased for her before I'd been forced to walk out of her life. I hadn't been able to find the ability to rid my house of the clothing I had purchased, and I was grateful for my weakness. As much as I would have loved her to walk around my house naked, I didn't think she would be comfortable with it. Especially under the current circumstances.

I walked back into the bedroom in time to catch Olivia staring at her dress in horror. "What happened?"

"I cut it off you." I explained simply before handing her the housecoat.

She dropped the dress, quickly snatching the housecoat from my hand, draping her shoulders with the fabric. "Thanks." She looked at the dress on the floor again. "I can't believe you cut up my dress."

"I'll buy you another." I said halfheartedly as I walked to the door.

"That's not the point, Jace." She snapped. "You shouldn't have cut it."

"I didn't want to wake you and you weren't sleeping with it on." I explained and she rolled her eyes. If she were my submissive, I would punish her. I thought about telling her this but decided it wasn't the time. She didn't know what she was agreeing to and I had to make her understand before I went and got all excited.

I rubbed my face tiredly. I wished I could be a normal man with normal desires…for her. I wished I could remain adamant in my belief that I didn't need this…but I wanted it. I wanted to possess her so badly and she was offering me the chance. Who the hell was I to pass that opportunity up?

I walked from the bedroom and Olivia followed behind me. My heart was a rapidly beating mess in my chest as I thought about how I was going to go about this. In every other woman I'd had the conversation with, I had never been this nervous. But I had never really cared what they thought of me. I hadn't cared about their fears of me…their repulsion by my desires. In fact, I hadn't really cared about all that much. However, I cared for Olivia. I didn't want her afraid of me. I couldn't handle that.

I led her to the kitchen and gestured to a barstool. "Sit." Her eyes narrowed at my command, but she didn't question it. She sat. "Your defiance in everything may turn out to be an issue."

"How so?" She asked.

"You say you want to be my submissive, Olivia. Do you even know the definition of that word?"

"Of course I know the definition." She snapped. Her cheeks blushed cherry pink and my cock strained against my pants. I ignored it.

"Exactly what do you think a submissive is?" I crossed my arms over my chest and leaned back against the counter, facing her.

She stammered. "I guess it's someone who is willing to bend to a dominants desires."

I nodded. "A submissive is someone, in your case, a woman, who is giving her dominant, me, control over nearly every aspect of her life. That is what my submissives do, Olivia." I set my eyes on her and she shrunk into herself. "Do you understand? Are you still so willing?"

"I don't think I understand, Jace." She said quietly.

"My submissives are 24/7 submissives."

She interrupted me. "I thought you didn't bring people here?"

"I don't." I stated. "I rent a condo for them to live in and when I want to be with them, I visit."

"You cover their living costs?" She gasped in apparent shock.

"Why wouldn't I?" I asked. "For the time they are with me, they are my possessions."

She flinched. I knew my words were harsh but I was being honest. If she wanted to do this, she wouldn't be going in blind. This was not something I was prepared to sugarcoat. If she agreed…she was agreeing knowing everything. Because there was no going back from this. Being a submissive could either break a person or make them. There were no two ways about it.

"How long do they stay?"

"Usually I have them sign a three month training contract and once they are trained they remain with me for another three months before I let them go."

"Six months," she breathed. "Why do you let them go after only six months?"

"Because it is around that time I see feelings start to arise and I cannot have that." I stated factually.

"You mean they fall in love with you?"

"Yes." My tone was barbed and she flinched again.

"Oh," She looked down to inspect the granite. "You don't want that?"

"No." I said before I thought about my words. Did I want her love? No…I couldn't possibly. This thing we had was a mutual need between us that we needed to find a way to sate. That's all.

She breathed out a long measured breath. "Wow, okay."

"Would you like to continue this conversation?"

"Yes."

That surprised me. Truly. "All right." I nodded. "What are you willing to do? And what aren't you willing to do?"

"Sexually?" She squeaked.

"Yes, Olivia." I sighed. "I need to know your hard limits and soft limits. I need to know what you can handle and what you can't."

She shrugged. "I don't know, Jace."

Right. Of course she didn't know. She'd only ever been with me. The thought had me wanting to beat my chest with my fists like an animal. Damn, what was this primal need I had within me to possess her so completely? The fact that I was the only one to ever lose myself in her was so fucking sweet I wanted to scream it from the rooftop.

"Well, I will tell you what I expect from you then." I stated and she nodded with wide eyes. "I expect you to allow me access to your body at all times. I expect you to try anything and everything once and if you do not like it, I expect you to tell me. Honesty is paramount. There is not a place in your body I will not burry myself if I can, Olivia. Do you understand? Your pussy, mouth and ass are mine to fill and only mine. Do you understand?"

"I understand." She confirmed on a shaky breath.

"Good." I eyed her carefully before continuing. "How do you feel about whips, floggers, crops and plugs?"

"Are you serious?" She asked on a thin breath.

"Very." I confirmed flatly.

"I don't know." She replied. Her words were shaky. "I've never been in the position to use one or have one used on me." Realization lit her features and she gasped. "You want to whip me?"

"Yes."

"Oh God," her face fell in her hands and I knew she was panicking, and rightfully so. "Oh my God."

"Olivia?" My tone was hard. "Talk to me. This will not work if you don't talk to me."

"I don't want to be beat, Jace." She lifted her face and her eyes were misted.

My gut ached. Fucking ached. "I don't want to beat you. I want to use sharp pains to inflict pleasure. The contrast between the two aids in higher stimulation for the body."

"Will you scar me?"

I frowned. "Fuck no."

"Okay." She nodded as though to convince herself before moving on. "What is a plug? What do you want to plug?"

I cocked a brow. She really was an innocent. And, I was going to hell. "I fully intend to claim your ass, Olivia. But for you to find pleasure in the act we are going to have to build your tolerance."

"What?" She frowned.

"You're going to have to stretch yourself." I said flatly. "I can't just shove my dick into your ass and pray you like it. You have to take in smaller objects first."

Her mouth dropped. "You want to plug my ass?"

"Essentially, yes." I nodded. "I want to stretch it."

"So you can fit inside?" She asked and even though I knew she was speaking her thoughts aloud, I answered.

"Yes."

Her eyes flickered up to mine and my heart paused. They were so big and wide and damn it, they were innocent. I should stop this right now. I should tell her I'm not interested…but I was.

"What else?"

I cocked a brow. I had to admit, her curiosity surprised me. "How do you feel about being bound, gaged and blindfolded?"

She chewed on her lip as she pondered the question. "I don't know how I feel about being gaged, but I think being blindfolded and bound is something I could deal with."

In other words, she liked the thought of being blindfolded and bound but she just couldn't admit it either to herself or to me - yet. Again, my cock jumped. "And why don't you like the idea of being gaged?"

She shrugged uncomfortably. "I," a sigh toppled from her lips. "It seems disrespectful."

"How so?"

"Well, why shouldn't I speak?"

"It's about control, Olivia. I want control over you and I want you to submit that control to me."

"So, you want the power?"

"I do." I nodded. "But in all reality, it is you who holds the true power here. It is you, as the submissive, I need in order to fulfill my own desires. It is your choice to stay with me. It's your choice to stop me when you become too uncomfortable. I will push you, Olivia, but I will never ignore your safe word. "

"I see." She pursed her lips and I found myself shocked that she knew what a safe word was.

"You cannot allow yourself to be influenced by what society deems right and wrong. In this agreement, we go on our own feelings. You have never been gaged and I can see the only reason you dislike it is because society considers it wrong, disrespectful, twisted. It's not. It's an erotic sight for me and I can assure you, it would excite you."

"I'll try, Jace." She looked right into my eyes and I felt as though she were seeing straight into my black, damaged soul. "I will try anything once."

I nodded, feeling more than excited at the thought of claiming her in such a way. "Good. You'll sign the contract and we'll go from there."

"No." She shook her head. "I already signed one contract. I'm not signing another."

I cocked my head. "Why not?"

"Because, I already agreed to everything. The contract I signed still stands to protect us both." She shrugged. "I will not sign another."

I nodded tightly. "Very well."

She was right. The contract she'd signed, however vague, will stand to protect us both. There is no need to make her sign another. We could begin.

"Are you ready for your training?"

Chapter 5

Holy shit! Oh. My. God.

What in the world had I gotten myself into? He wanted to start my
training
? Already? But, was I ready for this? I mean - I thought I could handle it. But could I really? Was I strong enough? Did I care enough to allow him complete control over my body? Did I trust him enough to allow him to possess me and care for me at the same time?