All In (5 page)

S
he couldn’t believe
she was doing this. She stared into her closet, heart pounding as she willed herself not to sweat off all the makeup she’d painstakingly painted on, she realized that she had nothing to wear. What did someone wear on a date? A real date. She hadn’t been on a real date in almost a decade, and back then it was all bars and beer. Ripped denim was as dressed up as anyone got.

“Loooooo,” she shouted to her friend. “Get your ass in here. What the fuck do I wear?”

“Pink. It sets off the color of your hair,” she shouted back.

“Get the hell in here, bitch! This is your doing, you fix it!”

Lo showed up in the closet doorway and began rifling through her wardrobe. “Pink blouse, nice, short puffy sleeves, fitted, cut low. Jeans, clean, dark, somewhat tight fitting, but not trying so hard and no muffin top. Nude heels. High enough to elongate the leg, short enough that you can walk comfortably.” She threw everything on the bed before striding back into the bathroom to finish her makeup.

“It’s a movie, Cass. Don’t think too hard about it.”

So easy for Lo to say. She’d probably spend her time in the dark sucking face with Dan.

“Better?” Cass twirled for her.

“Fantastic. Just one more thing,” Lo searched her makeup bag. “Lipgloss. Show off that luscious pout. Makes you more kissable.”

“No kissing. He’s got some making up to do.”

“Kissing is the best make up he could do,” Lo laughed.

Cass shook her head, distracted by the butterflies trying to escape from inside her stomach.

“Lo,” Cass looked up at her friend who looked perfection with her dark, bouncy curls and chocolate eyes framed perfectly in purple eyeliner.

“No. No freaking out!” Lo demanded. “You’ve dated before. It’s just like that.”

“I hated dating.” Cass focused on trying to calm her breathing.

“Then don’t think of it that way. Look at me,” Lo grabbed her, staring into her eyes. “You are a remarkable person, Cassidy Moore. You are strong, powerful. You’ve moved up in the ranks of a traditionally male industry. You’ve busted balls and stood up for those who are normally ignored. I know you. I love you. If Toph is an ass again, I’ll be right there to help you take him down. I might even lead the way.”

Cass grinned, her cheeks pressing against Lo’s hands. “It’s going to be okay,” she sighed. “I’m okay.”

“Good. Now, I’ve got a makeout session to get to, and you’ve got makeup kissing waiting. Where are my keys?”

“No kissing.”

“Heavy petting?”

“No.”

“Oral sex.”

“Shut up, or I might beat you.”

* * *

“
L
o
!” Dan waved from in front of the theater. He wore a dark leather jacket, black jeans, and a light blue shirt that set off his vibrant blue eyes. No wonder Lo couldn’t resist. Against his light brown skin, his eyes popped. He was stunning to look at.

“Hi, honey,” Lo purred, landing a hot and heavy kiss on her man’s lips. Cass bit her lip. It was going to be a long night.

“Where’s Toph?” she asked as she pulled away. Dan wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close.

“He went in to grab the tickets. Hey, Cass,” Dan smiled, his unnaturally straight teeth gleaming. She was far too fascinated by those teeth.

“Hey guys,” Toph said, as if on cue. Cass blushed. She couldn’t help it. “Hi, Cass,” he said, tense and worried.

“Hi,” she said, not offering any more. Mad’s voice in her head, reminding her that this was on him to make her feel more comfortable. She wasn’t going to do him any favors.

Frigid Bitch Queen. Paging Frigid Bitch Queen. Oh, yeah, she was comfortably in place.

“Let’s go in,” Dan said. “Lo and I will get the snacks. Why don’t you guys go inside?” he recommended.

Toph nodded, motioning for her to walk in front of him. Cass leaned into Lo, “If you fucking disappear, I will cut off those luscious curls while you’re sleep. And no, I’m not kidding.”

Lo snorted and shooed her on.

“I’m sorry, Cass,” Toph got straight to it.

Cass bit her lip, but said nothing.

“Look, I was drunk. I know that’s not an excuse, but I was. I just got out of a long-term relationship, and Lo and Dan said…well, I should’ve known better,” he shuffled his feet, his hair flopping in his eyes. Cass’ heart melted a little bit, but the Frigid Bitch Queen wasn’t ready to let him off that easy.

“Well, that’s a start,” she said, and before he could say anything, she continued, “Look, Toph, I’m not whatever they told you I am. I’m easy to talk to. I like to get to know people, but I’m slow to trust, and not always the easiest person. I’m not easy. In fact, I’m pretty difficult. So if you’re still looking to get laid, and get laid fast, then I’m not your girl.”

Toph stopped in his tracks. “I-, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“Yes, you did. You meant it. And that’s okay. You could’ve said it better, and you might not have yelled it at me and promptly turn toward a hoochie mama at the bar. So, yeah, you could’ve handled yourself better, but don’t be someone you’re not, either.”

“I’m not that guy. Really, I’m not,” Toph took her hand and led her into the theater. “Normally, I’m pretty much like this. I like you. I like how you just tell me how it is. I liked our conversation. I was hurt, drunk, and an idiot.”

“And you’re okay not getting any?”

“Ever?”

Cass laughed as she took her seat. “You’re a man. Of course not. I mean, for now?” She looked up at him, trying to keep the raging worry from showing in her eyes. Frigid Bitch Queen had started to melt, revealing a little of the vulnerability hidden beneath the ice.

He took her hand. “For now.”

She smiled. “Okay, then.”

* * *

L
o and Dan
managed to make it into the theater seconds before the lights went down, bringing water and popcorn, even. Cass smiled and congratulated her friend on actually following through, though both looked a little more rumpled than before they’d arrived.

The movie was pretty bad, which explained the mostly empty theater. Lo and Dan were back to making out within seconds, and Toph and Cass took it as an opportunity to make snarky comments about the film.

“‘Oh, Greg, please don’t leave me. My woefully feminine heart can’t take it!” Cass whispered to Toph.

“No! You must be my woman. Make food in kitchen. Bang on chest,” he growled.

Cass laughed. He really was easy to talk to, and the awkwardness was lost.

As the lights came up, they agreed that drinks were in order. After sitting through that terrible movie, they needed something to wash the pain away.

“Not getting laid, Toph,” she whispered, as they walked over to the bar.

He took her hand. “I know.”

“As long as we’re clear now.”

He stopped in his tracks, pulling her back. “Not now. I know. But Cass,” he said, pulling her into a kiss—his lips firm and demanding. He broke away and whispered against her lips, “One day. And that’s a promise. From me.”

Cass blinked and tried to catch her breath as they stepped into the bar. It was a Thursday night, so it was busy, but not like the madhouse it probably became on weekends. She was grateful for the noise that filled the space, because her brain was unable to form cohesive thoughts. She’d be useless in a conversation. She practically fell into the booth, and Toph penned her in, his hand on her thigh, his fingers tracing circles on her jeans.

“Drinks?” Dan asked.

“B-beer,” Cass stammered, and Lo smiled as she gave them her ridiculously fruity order.

“Dish!” Lo demanded, scooting closer.

“Nothing.”

“That kiss wasn’t nothing!” Lo pinched her arm.

“Ow!” she shrieked, and a few eyes peered over at them. She looked at the men at the bar and blushed. “You saw?”

“Yes, I saw. And you’re still dazed. Boy can kiss then?” she grinned.

“But boy still can’t be trusted,” she grumbled. It didn’t matter that the kiss was swoon worthy and left her breathless. She wasn’t so into letting an attraction make her forget a hurt. Trust was a really big deal, and she didn’t trust him enough to let him get into her pants.

“Girrrrllll, enjoy this. Stop thinking so much.”

Cass glared at her. For Lo this was so easy. She was so free. So open. She wasn’t riddled with anxiety. “It’s what I do.”

“Then do something else,” she said, and sat up straight. “Here they come.”

“So, dancing?”

“No,” Toph and Cass said in unison.

Lo stuck out her tongue at Cass. “Mature, Lo. Real mature,” Cass teased.

* * *

T
he conversation flowed easy
, just as it had the last time they were all together. No matter how comfortable it seemed on the surface, Cass never quite lost her anxiety. She let Toph touch her, though she wasn’t quite comfortable with that, either. She didn’t trust that he wouldn’t read more into it, and she worried about his reaction to the let down later when she’d have to remind him that he’d be going home alone at the end of the night. But part of her, a little evil voice, wanted to prove to Lo that it wasn’t just Maddox that she let touch her, and that voice was trumping her anxiety.

What did trouble her, though, was that Toph’s touch didn’t relax her. It sent familiar tingles down her spine and excited her, but it didn’t feel comfortable. She had to remind herself that it hadn’t felt comfortable at first in prior relationships, either. She’d had to set aside her discomfort until it faded away. Sure, with Maddox it always felt natural, but that didn’t mean much when she was sitting here with a man who, just a few moment ago decided he would one day bed her, and who she had decided one day was far, far away. She had to remind herself of Maddox’s encouragement that she held all the power. It was okay to tell a man she wasn’t ready, and it was up to him to own his reaction. She could stop Toph from touching her at any time, and she would, but for right now she would wait and see. It wasn’t like she hadn’t been clear of her intentions, no matter how far he was going to push his limits.

After a few hours, she felt herself drifting. She’d been playing with her hair, a telltale sign she was out past her bedtime, and she couldn’t disguise the yawns that were becoming more frequent.

“Tired?” Toph leaned into her, after her fifth yawn in the hour.

“Just a little,” she mumbled, her thoughts drifting to his lips. They were pretty lips. Soft, pliable, yet could be so insistent.

“Mhmmm,” he hummed, whispering his lips over hers. “I think it’s time to take you home.”

Cass stiffened.

“Just to drop you off,” he smiled, his eyes laughing.

“Okay,” she agreed. Once they got Dan and Lo’s attention, Toph escorted her out. Lo wouldn’t be coming back to Cass’. Dan was far too tempting for that. Toph offered to escort her home.

“I can cab it,” Cass told him, heading toward the taxi stand, pulling out her phone.

“I’m okay to drive,” Toph grabbed her hand, pulling her toward the parking lot. “I only had a couple drinks, and that was a while ago.”