All In: Paying His Way (Gambling With Love) (5 page)

“She’s not a fucking gold digger, and do I need to remind you to watch your mouth with my fist again?” I ask him, practically shaking with barely contained rage.

“You’re acting nuts, man," he says, rubbing his sore jaw. "What’s wrong with you?”

“Get the fuck out, and don’t you dare say a word about this to Jason. She doesn’t want him near the baby, and I can’t say I really blame her.”

“Listen to yourself, dickhead! Why wouldn’t she want you to tell him, unless she’s lying? It's some broke-ass fucker’s baby, and she's pawning it off on Jason for a payout!”

“
Get out
!” I yell and point toward the door in case he’s too stupid to remember where it is. He glares silently at me for several seconds before he finally walks out, slamming my front door behind him.

Chest still heaving with adrenaline, I sink down on the sofa and call my brother Jake to see if he thinks I’m being an idiot.

“Jordy, what’s up?” Jake answers with the name he’s called me since he started talking.

“Jake, hey, um, have you got a few minutes?” I ask. My brother’s a wide receiver, playing professional football in Charlotte for the Wildcats going on his fourth year, and he’s always busy, even in the off season. Especially since he started dating Addison, and she moved in with him.

“Yeah, sure. What’s up?” he asks.

“What would you say if I told you Jason got a girl pregnant?”

“That dumbass motherfucker,” he grumbles.

“Exactly.”

“Who’d he knock up?”

“Maggie Frasier. Remember her?”

“Well, yeah. They’ve been together since high school, and he broke her heart over and over again.”

“Uh-huh. And now he’s left her broken-hearted with a one-month-old son.”

“Ah, shit. Why didn’t he tell us before now?”

“She said she told him before he left. He called her a liar and said she was just trying to get him back or some shit.”

“Sounds like something that asshole would do.”

“I know, right? When I told Josh, his first words were to accuse her of being a lying whore.” My fists clench, wanting to hit him again for saying that shit.

“Those two…Josh has always taken up for Jason and his screw-ups, usually because he was the instigator.”

“So, you don’t think I’m crazy for believing her?” I ask.

“No. I mean, if you talked to her, and she seems legit to you, then she probably is.”

“Yeah, and you won’t believe how shitty she’s living, having to take care of this baby on her own. Her apartment is in the worst possible part of Greensboro, and she barely affords to eat or feed him.”

“Damn, that sucks. The fucknut needs to cough up some child support.”

“Uh, that’s the thing. After how he acted, she’s decided that she doesn’t want him to have anything to do with the baby.”

“I don’t blame her,” he says on a sigh, echoing my sentiments. “So, I’m guessing you’re pitching in to make up for our sorry ass brother’s responsibility?”

“Yeah.”

“Let me know what you need. I can send some money for you to give her.”

“Thanks, Jake. Whatever you can do. I bought Camden a swing today, and I’m gonna take over to her tomorrow.”

“Camden? That the baby’s name?”

“Oh, um, yeah. Camden Douglas.”

“Well, if I didn’t believe her before, then I do now. Why would she give him Jason’s middle name if he wasn’t his?”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought, too.”

“I can’t wait to tell Addy. She’ll probably want to buy him all sorts of baby shit.”

That makes me smile, because I can see her pulling up with her convertible so full of shit she has to put the top down. Addy’s a great girl, and my brother’s lucky to have her. He knows it too.

“If you want to see him some time, I can talk to Maggie.”

“Yeah, I do. What’s he look like?”

“Dark eyes and a little bit of dark hair. Really little and he eats all the time.”

“Sounds like one of us.”

“Yeah,” I agree with a chuckle. “I’ll take some pictures and send them to you.”

“Sounds like you’ve been spending a lot of time with him and this girl.”

“So? He’s my nephew.
Our
nephew,” I say defensively.

“I can’t believe I’m an uncle. That shit’s crazy.”

“It is indeed.”

“Mom and Dad would've been so damn happy to have a grandson."

"I know," I say and have to swallow past the tightening in my throat.

"Well, keep me updated.”

“Will do. See ya, Jake. Tell Addy hi.”

“I will. Later.”

Hanging up, I flip over to Facebook and see that Maggie’s posted several photos of Camden today. I click on the thumbs up symbol for each, liking them, and somehow find my way into her photo albums. The most recent pics before today are a year-old. Maggie looks so much younger, but rarely smiles in any of the photos. Most are group photos other people tagged her in. In fact, she doesn’t have any selfies, unlike most girls her age. Her pictures go all the way back to high school, and a few are from prom or a dance. One she probably went to with my dickhead brother. She looked pretty in a long black dress, but she still wasn’t smiling.

Since the green dot beside Maggie’s name is lit up, showing she’s online, I send her a message.

“
I bought something for Camden today. Can I bring it to him with dinner after work tomorrow
?”

Her response is almost instantaneous.

“
You don’t have to do that, Jordan
.”

Okay, she didn’t answer my question.

“
And you’re his uncle, so you can see him anytime you want
.”

Right, seeing my nephew should be the only agenda I have here. This is about helping take care of my brother’s son, not flirting with his mother. But for some reason, I just can’t stop thinking about her.  

Maggie

Wednesday afternoon I’m unable to sit still knowing Jordan’s on his way. He sent me a message last night telling me he had something for Camden he wanted to bring by after work with dinner. Of course I told him he didn’t need to do anything like that, but I didn’t tell him not to come. In fact, I'm excited about seeing him again. So much so that for the first time in what feels like forever I quickly blow-dried my long hair using the brush to curl the ends under and put on the tiny bit of makeup I had stashed away from before Camden was born.

Looking in the mirror at my floral dress that hides my baby fat, the same one I was wearing Sunday, I feel…almost human again. For weeks I’ve barely had time to shower every day and didn’t have much energy to do anything more. But today, I have a reason to want to try and look nice.

My shoulders slump at how idiotic this makes me. I still look like a hag compared to the man who will be here any minute now. Feeling stupid in the dress, I take it off and put on a tank top with a shelf bra and a pair of cotton shorts so it doesn’t look like I’m pathetic for trying so damn hard.

I’ve barely pulled the clothes on when I hear the knock on the door and rush to open it.

When I do, I’m expecting to see the tall, dark and handsome man, but not the huge, adorable baby swing. I’m actually speechless for several seconds.

“Hey,” Jordan says while I stand in the doorway, mute.

“Jordan, this is too much-” I start.

“Hush. There’s no reason I can’t buy shit for my nephew. Now let me in so I can show you how cool this thing is.”

Stunned and unable to do anything more than smile up at him, I move into the kitchen so that he can get through the door and carry the swing to the living room.

I watch in awe as Jordan picks up Camden like he’s done it a hundred times, not just once, and straps him into the cushioned papasan seat. After he plugs the cord in the wall, he reaches up to the top and presses a few buttons that makes it start to gently sway side-to-side, before he turns on the mobile and even turns on a quiet lullaby.

Camden’s eyes brighten as he tilts his head up to watch the little animals, a purple hippo, a green alligator, a blue elephant and orange tiger, go in circles around his head. Okay, this might be the best invention ever.

“Wow, Jordan. This is amazing,” I tell him.

“Yeah, and I think he actually likes it.”

“He does,” I affirm, watching Camden’s eyelids get heavier until they finally close. “And now I’m officially sold. Thank you.”

“It’s nothing,” Jordan says modestly, although I’m sure this thing was at least a hundred dollars, probably more. “So, let’s order some dinner.”

“Dinner?” I ask. Hasn’t he done enough? All his good deeds just end up making me feel guilty for not being able to afford this stuff on my own.

“Yeah, I was going to order something.
Jimmy Johns
?”

“Oh, go ahead, but I’m not hungry.”

After that statement he just…looks at me, his dark gaze heavy and intimidating. “Maggie?”

“Uh-huh?” I mutter, taking a seat on the couch.

“What do you want?”

“Nothing.”

“I guess I’ll just have to get one of every sandwich since you won’t just tell me what the hell you want,” he says, pulling out his phone.

When he calls and starts giving an order to the person on the line, I finally give up and tell him turkey. With a smile, he adds chip, cookies and God only knows what else before ending the call. “They’ll be here so fast you’ll freak,” he tells me, sitting down on the other side of the sofa. Even with a cushion separating us, I can smell his yummy cologne, sweet and masculine at the same time.

We sit in silence, neither of us saying anything. Maybe we’re both hypnotized by watching the rhythmic motion of the swing.

“He has his one-month check-up tomorrow,” I say, unable to think of anything else to talk about.

“Oh, good. Let me know what they tell you,” Jordan replies.

“Sure.”

“Is it okay if I take a few pictures to send Jake?” he asks.

“Um, sure.”

He gets up and squats down in front of the swing to take a few shots with his phone, and then types on it before putting it away again.

“Jake said he’d like to see him sometime, him and his girlfriend Addison.”

“He’s the football player, right?” I ask.

“We all played football, but, yeah, Jake’s always been the best,” he chuckles. “Jason could’ve been if he wasn’t such a slacker.”

Jason had played football up until our sophomore year when his parents died, and then getting high or drunk took precedence over organized team sports. I was right there with him during most of the partying, so I can't act like I was any better.

“That damn swing is gonna put me to sleep,” Jordan says after several more silent moments go by.

“I could try and find something on TV?” I offer. The small television sitting on a plastic container only gets about ten stations. I usually just have it on in the background, the volume turned down low.

“No, that’s okay.”

I nod, and then my eyes start to get heavy. I rest my head on my arms propped up on the sofa arm rest, saying I’ll just rest a few minutes until the food gets here.

Camden’s cries wake me up. The dampness on my chest tells me he either slept through his last feeding or he’s been crying for a few minutes. Blinking my eyes open, I find Jordan pacing the floor, holding Camden on his shoulder, bouncing him and talking softly to him. It’s so sweet that my eyes start to water. Stupid hormones.

“I think he’s hungry,” Jordan states the obvious when he sees me sit up on the couch. Noticing his eyes lowering to my chest, I glance down. My cheeks instantly warm in embarrassment when I see the milk’s saturated both sides of my top, soaking through my tank, forming silver dollar size circles.

“I’ll be right back,” I say before quickly heading for the bedroom Camden and I share to find a dry shirt. Although, if he doesn’t start drinking soon I’ll keep oozing. “Hey, Jordan? Could you bring him in here?”

“Ah, what?” I hear his deep response.

“I need to feed him to get it to stop or I’m gonna keep soaking through shirts,” I say. Taking off my tank top, I wrap a towel around my chest, tucking one side into the other.

“Maggie, are you decent?” Jordan asks from the doorway. When I turn around, his back is to me in case I’m not. 

“Yeah, hand him over so he’ll stop screaming,” I say. Still clearly uncomfortable, Jordan turns around slowly and his eyes stay on my towel until I take the bundle from his arms.

“Thanks,” I reply, going to sit on the other side of the bed so I can split the opening and guide Camden’s mouth to my breast.

“So, I guess I better go,” he tells me.

“Before the food gets here?” I ask in confusion.

“Um, Maggie, it’s almost ten o’clock.”

“What?” I exclaim turning to look at the alarm clock to confirm. I’ll be damned!

“I put your sandwich in the fridge. Will you come lock up after me?”

“Oh, ah, sure. God, I’m sorry Jordan. You should’ve woken me up when you needed to leave,” I tell him, hoisting myself and the baby in my arms up. I grab a blanket from the laundry basket of clean clothes to cover up before following him to the front door.

“I didn’t mind staying, and you looked like you needed the sleep.”

“Well, yeah, but I can sleep without you being here.” His large bulky frame is just inches from me in the confined entry way, his scent intoxicating in this close proximity. I can feel the heat radiating from his body, even though he’s not touching me.

“Tomorrow night I’m coming to pick you both up, so have your shit packed. I have to work Friday, but you’re gonna stay with me this weekend.”

“What? No,” I respond when his words penetrate through my drowsiness.

Jordan’s jaw is so tight I see his cheek flex. “Come on, Maggie. I have two beds at my house, but if I stay here, I’ll have to sleep on the couch.”

“Why the heck would you stay here?” I squeak.

“So you can sleep.”

“Now you’re talking nonsense. Go home, Jordan.”

“I’m serious, Maggie.”

“I am too. I’m not hauling his bed and everything somewhere else when we’re perfectly fine here.”

“You won’t have to haul his bed. I’ll get one of those travel bed things.”

“There’s no reason to do that.”

“You’re gonna lose this argument, woman.”

“You can’t make me go with you,” I tell him.

“No, but I want you to,” he says softly. And then he doesn’t fight fair when he brushes his lips over my cheek in a kiss so soft, I’m not entirely certain I didn’t imagine it. “Lock up,” he orders, and then he’s gone, leaving me to wonder what the hell just happened.

…

Jordan

I kissed her.

Maybe it only seemed like an innocent peck on the cheek to her, but to me…it was more potent than any other kiss in all my nearly thirty years. It was me crossing a line that I can’t uncross, and I don’t want to. The way I feel when I’m near her, and even when I’m fifty miles away, is so much more than friendly. This weekend, if she agrees to stay with me, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to keep my hands off of her, but first I need to know if this is one-sided.

How do I do that?

God, I feel like an awkward teenager again, probably because the thoughts I have about her are so inappropriate, especially since she has a history with my little brother, and they have a son together. This is wrong in so many ways, but Maggie and Camden deserve to have someone take care of them. If my brother’s not gonna do it, then I don’t think that means I shouldn’t either. And I
wan
t to take care of them. The way I want to take care of Maggie just so happens to involve kissing her and touching every inch of her body.

This weekend I’ll try and figure out if she wants the same thing from me, or if she’s still hung up on my brother. If she is, then I’ll keep my distance and not come between them. But if not, we’ll see where this goes.