All is Lost (All Series, Book 2) (44 page)

I need to taste
her
. My tongue edges along her ear,
retracing my path. Her deep gasp tells me that I am taking her mind
off of everything. A lustful moan rattles hard in my chest, like a
bullet just ripped through me, slicing my dark heart. Breesan is my
light in this dark and sinister world, bursting forth. It is her
love alone that brightens the evil pathway and draws my heart out
of the eclipsing blackness, dimmed by past
relationships.

Needing more, I wind my
hands through her long dark curls and draw her closer, digging my
fingers into her neck. The pressure isn’t enough to hurt her, but
it is enough for her to understand that I must have more. She
spreads her legs apart and I take up position between them.
Caressing one hand down her back, I reach her hip and grip it
tightly, and she comes willingly. I drag her to the edge of the
counter and press hard into her.
Slow
down
, I tell myself.

“
You’re really here,”
Breesan says, believing it so, now that she’s out of her earlier
haze. She’s panting hard and her heart rate matches mine. Wanting
her to know how much I missed her, I graze my mouth over her bottom
lip, instantly needing more. Covering her mouth with mine, I kiss
her softly, but it only adds to my desire. Her lips move in unison
with mine, and our reunion becomes scorching. I shouldn’t kiss her
so passionately, during a time like this, but she is everything.
Thrusting her breast against my chest, Breesan opens her mouth with
a heavy moan. Hearing that sweet sound for the first time in a long
time, I lose my mind and I take it–roughly. I take every whimper,
every grunt and every sigh, but it’s still not enough.
I want more
.

While pushing my rock solid
hard-on between her widespread legs, I pull her by her sweet ass
brutally against me. She clinches her legs tightly, holding me
against her center and I nearly come apart. I feel her heating from
our friction and all I want at this very moment is to drop down on
my knees and taste her. Releasing the intense hold I have on her
backside, I slip my hand around her hip and graze over the top of
her thigh, unable to
stop myself.
I need to feel her.

Incapable of processing a damn thought
any longer, I take our relationship to a level we’ve never been. I
glide my hand between her legs and cup her, feeling her wetness
through her shorts. Throwing her head back, she groans and pushes
forward against my hand.

“
Ohmygod,” Breesan’s voice
is raspy with bliss.

I drop my eyes down to where my
fingers press into her, feeling my heart stall completely. Mygod,
watching her writhe on my hand is the most fucking intoxicating
thing I’ve ever seen, even with her fully dressed.

“
Marcus, I need you so
much,” She says in a voice only meant for the bedroom.

Hearing Breesan say my name and
telling me her needs while I’m getting her close to climax causes
my heart to squeeze so tight that I feel like it might explode.
Clawing her nails into my hair and pulling me down, she crashes my
mouth on hers. In this kiss, I give Breesan my heart, my soul and
everything that I am, confirming after being away from her too damn
long that I am irrevocably in love with her.

She slips her hands under
my shirt, tracing up my stomach and stopping when she reaches my
chest.
She needs me too
, I justify practically screwing her on the kitchen
counter.

“
Not in the kitchen.” A
playful voice sings, breaking up our reunion and I want to kill the
son of a bitch for interrupting us.

Stilling in my arms, Breesan’s gray
eyes snap open, piercing me with a combination of fear and
embarrassment that surges through them.

She whispers, “Ohgod.”

“
Hey you two love-birds, I
said, not in the kitchen. So knock it off.”

It is Sam barging in on us that
explains Breesan’s reaction. Because it’s my sister and not one of
the guys she looks like she wants to crawl under a rock and hide.
Looking at Breesan’s swollen lips and tangled hair, I’m thankful
that I didn’t go against my promise and fuck her now. After
everything that’s happened, it would be a real bastardly move on my
part.

Not really giving a shit about what
Sam says, I brush stray hairs away from Breesan’s face and stare
into her eyes. I need to know that I didn’t hurt her.

“
Are you okay,
Baby?”

“
Yes,” she says struggling
hard to calm her body after getting caught up in our kissing and
grinding. “Will you please help me down?”

After doing as Breesan asks, we sit
together at the kitchen table with Sam. Not wanting Breesan to feel
guilty or embarrassed, I tuck her tiny body under my arm then give
Sam a stern glare. She understands even without my look that
talking about this would mortify Breesan.

“
Rhys told me what happened
at Granddad’s,” Sam says cryptically to Breesan.

“
Can you figure out what’s
happening?” Breesan asks.

I remain quiet, hoping they will
explain what they’re talking about soon.

“
I think I already know,
but I need a little proof. I’m going to stay at the mansion until I
can bring him back here.”

“
Oh thank God.” Breesan’s
breath whooshes out. “I’m scared for him.”

“
I know Hon,” Sam says
sweetly, staring at Breesan with compassion.

“
Are you going to clue me
in, ladies?” I ask, completely clueless about their
topic.

Breesan sighs, “I promise to tell you
later. Do you have any ideas about the murder?”

“
I know that you must be
upset and that’s natural,” Sam starts. “If you need someone to talk
to I am here. I don’t know how much Rhys and Tac explained, but
there are a lot of unanswered questions, all of which we may never
get the answers to. That is something you need to accept now. In
this filthy disgusting world of crime nothing is ever cut and dry,
and not everyone gets a happy ending. Sadly, this is our life. Yes,
we chose it, and if given a chance, most of us will do it all over
again because we make a difference. It may not make national
headlines, but creeps like Dr. A can’t run from us
forever.”

Breesan’s body begins shaking against
my chest. I lift her face up with my hand under her chin and see
tears streaking down her cheeks.

Stiffening her back and meeting my
eyes with renewed determination, she whispers, “I’m not crying
for...”

Understanding that her heart is broken
with the recent information about her friends and the death, I
place my lips on her forehead, whispering against her soft skin.
“You can take a couple of days to process everything, and let us
make the arrangements.” I pepper kisses down her face to her temple
before pulling away, “We’ll need to be very strategic on getting
you into the funeral home without being noticed.”

“
I can’t go,” Breesan
sniffs. “I don’t think I can do it, Marcus.”

My heart breaks for my beautiful love,
thinking of her dealing with everything all at once. When it comes
to Breesan, my natural dominating instinct is protection, at all
cost. Even if protecting her means risking my own life or limb, not
one hair on her head will be harmed.

Reaching a hand across the table
toward Breesan, Sam asks, “Is there anyone I can call? Perhaps
there is someone that…”

While accepting Sam’s hand, Breesan
cuts her off, “No, there’s no one left. According to Julia, my
grandparents died in a car accident years before I was born. She
never shared details about my dad and now I may never know.
“

“
Okay then, if you’re not
going to the funeral then do you at least want to take a break and
get away for a little while? I’m sure my sweet little brother can
come up with the perfect place to sweep you away to,” Sam says,
glancing between me and Breesan.

I want nothing more than to take
Breesan away from this hell. Time alone just might be what she
needs to deal with it and heal from her loss. “You tell me what you
want to do and I’ll make it happen.”

Chewing on her bottom lip, she looks
from Sam to me before saying, “I want to go home. I always felt my
dad closest there and at the castle. I haven’t been to either in so
long and…I just need it right now.”

***

Returning to the Maxwell house after
being away for several weeks now is surreal. So many things have
transpired since accepting the security job from Julia. My family
is ripped apart, my friends have gone against the rules to keep
Breesan alive, and the person I never expected to mean anything to
me is the one who means the most. Escorting her inside the house, I
take the small duffel bag by the strap and remove it from her
shoulder before dropping it on the bottom step.

A dark, haunting silence greets us.
Breesan stands completely still facing down the hallway. Sliding my
hand into hers, I lace our fingers together and bring them up to my
lips.

“
That’s his study at the
end of the hallway,” she says, staring straight ahead. “Will you go
with me?”

“
Of course I will,
Baby.”

We enter into the office belonging to
Breesan’s dad, and she crosses the room to the bookshelf. I switch
on the lamp sitting on the desk. She removes a couple of books and
I notice a safe in the wall at the back of the bookcase. After
working through the combination, she opens it and pulls out a
bundle of papers, leaving a couple of handguns and a small velvet
box.

“
This is it,” she whispers,
turning around and offering the papers to me. “All that remains of
my dad.”

“
You don’t have to do this
right now, Love.”

“
No. I–I must do this.” She
sits down in the chair, flipping open the folder before looking up
at me. “Some of the answers we need could be in the things he hid
from Julia. I found his safe a short time before the shooting. She
came in and took some away from me, but I shut and locked the door
before she could get all of it. She told me that I could have
everything when I turned nineteen. After what happened on my
birthday, I don’t think she intended for me to get it back. What I
found out that night was alarming.” Breesan sighs and says, “I’m
really glad you made it home and are here with me.”

Walking around the desk I lean against
it. She keeps her eyes on me and grins when I take her hand in
mine.

“
I don’t ever want you
going through something like this without me, Baby. You are one
tough woman, but I can see that you’re suffering. In the past, when
you were hurt, you would shut people out and deal with it alone.”
Fisting my hand through her hair, I grip the side of her head while
my thumb strokes over her cheek. “Please don’t ever shut me out
Breesan. I will go mad if you do.”

Rising from her chair, she slips her
arms around my waist and places her chin on my chest, staring up at
me. I dig both hands into her hair and fight back the urge to kiss
away any desire she may ever have to shut me out.

“
While you were gone I had
a lot of time to think. Normally, that is
not
a good thing. I tend to over
think everything.” A smile plays at the corners of my mouth. “My
past was all about me needing to keep everyone out so I couldn’t
get hurt again. Last week, I realized something about
that
whole plan. My heart
misses Anna and Tristan. Life without friends and people to love
freaking sucks. I have been living in perpetual hell for the last
few weeks without them, but I haven’t spent one second of it alone.
With Sam, Rhys, Kole, Morgan, Tac and even Ensley around, I’ve
gotten a glimpse into a life filled with people who care about me
and I like it. I hate my past so much.” Her mouth curves up into a
sweet and encouraging smile before she continues, “Because… in the
past, I didn’t have you, Marcus.”

With her confessing how important I
am, I want to tell her how I really feel about her, but with
everything she has been through I can’t take advantage of her
emotional state. I don’t want her feeling pressured to say it back.
I curl my fingers through her silky hair and watch her eyes close,
enjoying our contact. I love looking at her deep gray eyes, but
seeing those long lashes feather across her cheeks combined with a
serene expression only deepens my love for her.

I press my lips to her
forehead and whisper, “You have me now, Baby.”
A
nd you always
will
.

With a melancholy frown, she glances
up at me, “I’m going to postpone going through my dad’s things for
tonight. Without the fear of Julia intruding, it really can wait.”
With an exhausted breath, she says, “I still can’t believe she’s
dead. You really think Dr. A killed her, don’t you?”

“
I do,” I nod. “Her neck
was broken and she washed ashore near Savannah. We think they
docked there on their way back up the coast.”

“
Okay,” she nods and
whispers, “Can we go just upstairs now? Today was a nightmare. I
want to jump in the shower and hope that I can wash it all down the
drain, except for the part where you came home.”