All Of You (Only You) (9 page)

The air in the small box winging its way to the top of the thirty-storey building suddenly evaporated as Claire's temperature rose along with it. By the time it reached her floor, she all but sprang through the doors when they opened. Her cheeks burned, and she had no doubt they would be flushed bright red. Hopefully anyone seeing her would think she'd gotten a touch of sunburn during lunch. Quickening her pace, Claire was thankful to find the reception desk empty as she entered the outer office.

With a sigh of relief she headed down the corridor to her office. Claire closed the door behind her and walked over to her chair. There were several packages beside her desk that she hoped meant the samples of the winter line had arrived. Once she'd put her purse away, she began opening the boxes. She draped the clothes across her desk, making sure she could see the full range. Standing back to get an overall view of the collection, she couldn't help but be pleased with their buyer's choices in styles and colors. This season's range was their best yet, and the sales figures were bound to reflect that come the end of winter season.

She was busy putting the clothes back in the boxes when Adele buzzed her to say there was a delivery for her. Making her way down the corridor to reception, she wondered what the delivery could be. Claire was stunned to see a man holding a huge bouquet of flowers waiting next to the front desk.

"Claire Jones?" The deliveryman asked.

"Yes, that's me."

"Sign here please." He thrust a clipboard at her.

She scrawled her signature on the dotted line then passed it back and reached for the lovely blooms. "Thank you."

He grunted and left, but his rudeness couldn't take away her joy at receiving such a beautiful gift. She spied a card and juggling the bunch in her arms she plucked the note from between two orchids to read who'd sent them. Her heart skipped a beat when she read Ryan's name scribbled in his distinct handwriting on the bottom. But it was the simple message he'd written that made her chest tight and her pulse race.

"Because their beauty reminded me of you."

Claire folded the card and tucked it back into the flowers. Bringing them to her face, she took a deep breath. Their smell filled her nose, and she smiled into the gorgeous bundle in her arms.

"So who are they from?"

She'd forgotten all about Adele, forgotten she was standing in the foyer and not her office. Startled, she turned to face the other woman. "Ryan."

With a smile still on her face, Claire was turning to go back to her office when the younger woman's words stopped her.

"You know, I didn't know you'd been married."

"What?" Claire glanced over her shoulder. "I've never been married."

"Oh. Well then I admire you even more. It must have been so hard to do it on your own. And you managed to hold down a great career as well."

Claire had no idea what Adele was talking about. "Adele, you're talking in riddles. I have no idea what you're trying to say."

"Your son."

Confused even more, Claire met the other woman's gaze. "My son?"

"Yes." Adele indicated the flowers with her hand. "Ryan. You must be so proud of him."

Years of experience in the business world kept Claire from showing any reaction. Just. Her mind whirled with what Adele thought. A sharp pain sliced into her. This was the very thing she had been afraid of. "Ryan isn't my son, Adele. He's my neighbor."

"Really? Wow, what a great view your place has." The predatory smile on Adele's face made Claire's stomach tighten, and her next words had Claire's whole body stiffening. "So is he dating anyone? Think you could give him my number?"

A snarl gurgled in the back of Claire's throat, but she plastered a smile on her face and pushed words out through clenched teeth. "I'm not a match-making service Adele, so I won't be handing out anyone's phone number."

Claire spun on her heel and strode down the hall to her office before the young woman could say any more. Slamming the door behind her, she dropped the bouquet on her desk and fell into her chair. She should put the flowers in water, but the horrible scene with Adele just ke
pt replaying in her mind. Ryan
was
young enough to be her son. She'd been a fool to think it didn't matter. No matter how much it would hurt she had to let him go.

He needed to find a woman his own age, and as long as he was seeing her that wouldn't happen. Maybe she should pass on Adele's number, but the thought of anyone else with Ryan gave Claire a pain in the stomach. Not to mention the one in her chest. Closing her eyes, she leaned back in her chair and tried to calm her turbulent thoughts. She needed to think, and at the moment the only thing she could think about was the churning in her belly and the pressing need to vomit.

Half an hour and a packet of antacids later, Claire still struggled to stifle the urge to be sick. Though it was something she rarely did, she packed up her desk, grabbed her flowers, and left work early. She just wanted to go home and crawl into bed.

On the drive home she rang Jane and told her where she was. Not going into details, Claire just said she wasn't feeling well and heading home to sleep it off. With any luck no one would bother her for the rest of the day, and she could at least get some alone time to figure out what to do.

*****

Ryan threw his phone onto the passenger seat of his truck. He'd finally found out why he couldn't get hold of Claire. It had only taken him numerous phone calls that weren't picked up and one to the reception desk at her work. She'd gone home sick. He was worried. And angry. She hadn't rung him. Disappointment waded into the pool of emotions currently churning his insides. Didn't she know she could count on him? Could call on him for anything? With a sigh of frustration he started the truck and reversed out of the site.

Brett waved him off as he pulled away from work. Ryan knew his brother would give him grief later over his need to go to Claire, but right now all he could think about was getting to her and making sure she was okay. At the first red light he came to he reached for his phone and pressed the speed dial button for Claire. The hands free audio system kicked in and blasted the ringing of her phone through the car's speakers.

It rang and rang until finally it went to voicemail. He disconnected. There were enough messages from him already on there. The closer he got to home the more his confused emotions threatened to choke him. All kinds of worst-case scenarios flew across his mind. Visions of Claire collapsed in her house, or mangled in the wreckage of her car had ice filling his veins. Of course it could just be that she wasn't answering her phone or she'd switched it off but he wouldn't know that until he got there. Ryan pressed down harder on the accelerator.

Traffic was light for mid-afternoon and Ryan made it home in record time. He pulled into his parking space and hardly had the ignition turned off before he bounded from the vehicle and ran for Claire's door. He pressed the doorbell, holding his finger down longer than necessary. When he let go the only sound was the echo of the bell. He thumped his fist against the door several times before pushing the bell again. Still no noise came from inside, and Ryan's gut tightened.

His heart pounded in his ears and his muscles were taut with the strain of holding back the panic dancing on his nerve endings. Resting his ear on the door, he listened for any sign of Claire but he heard only silence. Giving in to the fear slicing into him he slammed both fists against Claire's front door.

"Claire!"

Chapter Five

Claire moaned as the pounding in her skull increased. She rolled over and pulled the pillow around her head, but it didn't stop the hammering. Or the yelling. Was there a party going on outside? Tossing the pillow aside, she lifted gritty eyelids and blinked several times, her eyes watering at the brightness. The last thing she remembered was crying over Ryan. Glancing at her bedside clock, Claire saw she'd been home only a couple of hours. At some point she must have drifted off to sleep.

The banging grew louder and the doorbell joined in. She bolted upright and threw her legs over the side of the bed. Someone was knocking on her door? Her mind felt fuzzy, and her stomach revolted as she pushed to her feet. Stars burst in front of her eyes before blackness crept in on the edges of her vision. Claire reached out and wrapped her hand around the bedpost to stay upright. Seconds passed as she waited for the world to right its self and her belly to settle. Gingerly, she took a step, then another, and another until she'd made it across her room and into the hall.

At the top of the stairs, the voice calling her name registered in her sleep-mused mind. Ryan. And from the tone of his voice and the force of his hammering on the door, he was about to break the damn thing in.

"I'm coming, I'm coming." Her voice echoed around her skull but only came out a whisper. Quickening her steps, Claire hurried down the stairs as fast as she dared.

Noise bounced off the foyer walls and multiplied a hundred times, making Claire winced. Her fingers fumbled the locks, and—thankfully—Ryan stopped beating on the door so she could concentrate on getting it open.

Claire stumbled back as Ryan pushed the door inward. She didn't have a chance to fall as he scooped her up in his arms and cradled her against the solid wall of his chest. The idea that this was wrong, that she needed to let him go, flitted through her mind before the comforting warmth and strength that was Ryan seeped into her. Giving in, she allowed him to carry her back to her room.

"Why didn't you ring me? I would have picked you up from work, brought you home." His lips brushed her temple as he spoke.

"Not that bad." She managed to get out. Sleepy, she curled in closer to Ryan and let his heartbeat soothe her.

"Come on, let's get you into bed and comfortable."

He placed her gently on the bed and pulled the covers up, tucking her in. She watched through droopy eyes as he checked her forehead for fever.

"Are you thirsty? Do you need anything? Medication? Pain pills?"

She shook her head and he sat on the floor beside the bed, his hand stroking her hair back from her face. His simple caress and obvious concern made her want to cry again, but she refused to let the emotion show in front of him. Claire knew she should stop him from taking care of her, knew she had to stop taking advantage of him, but she was selfish enough to want just a little more of Ryan before she let him go.

*****

Ryan watched Claire sleep. She hadn't moved since he tucked her in bed. He'd raced next door quickly to grab a change of clothes, but he hadn't showered yet. He couldn't bring himself to leave her for the short time it would take to get cleaned up. Her sleep had been peaceful, and as far as he could tell she didn't have a fever. The illness that had sent her home from work was still a mystery to him. Red puffy eyes and dark smudges beneath them were the only visible sign of anything wrong. Maybe she'd just been working too hard lately.

Guilt rode heavily on his shoulders when he thought about all the nights he'd kept her up late, unable to keep his hands off her. Not that his cock was on the same wavelength. No, the damn thing lived in a state of semi-arousal. This close to Claire and a bed and he'd been rock hard since he put her beneath the covers. Good thing he had some self-control. And from now on he'd make sure to hold onto that control a whole lot tighter.

Ryan pushed up from his position on the floor beside the bed. He really did need to shower. She hadn't stirred at all since he returned from his place. She appeared to be in a deep sleep, so he doubted she'd wake in the five minutes it would take him to clean up. He reached down and checked one more time that she didn't have a fever before he brushed his fingers through her hair, combing the silky strands away from her face. A sigh slipped from between her lips, but she remained asleep. He picked up his clothes and headed into her bathroom.

At some point over the last few weeks Claire's bathroom had acquired Ryan's brand of toothpaste, soap, razor, and shaving cream. He wasn't sure how it had happened, but both their houses had merged and multiplied. Two houses both stocked with the same things, and them splitting their time between. It seemed silly to carry on the way they were, especially when those homes were right next door and shared a common wall.

Ryan stripped out of his dirty clothes and threw them in the hamper. He didn't wait for the water to heat. The first blast of cold caused him to grit his teeth, but he grabbed the soap and quickly scrubbed away the day's sweat and grime. Ducking his head under the spray, he ran his fingers through his hair. The short cut he favored took no time to shampoo. He skipped shaving, so he was out within the five minutes he'd predicted.

Running a towel over his body roughly, he dried off and pulled on his sweatpants and shirt. The clothesbasket was overflowing. He grabbed it and left the room. He'd check on Claire and then throw a load of washing on. She'd turned over but still slept peacefully, and he was more than pleased to find she still felt cool. Happy her illness didn't appear serious, Ryan headed downstairs with their dirty clothes.

After dealing with their laundry, Ryan made himself a sandwich and grabbed a can of soft drink. He thought about sitting in front of the TV to eat, but his feet went in the other direction, taking him back up to Claire's room and the floor beside the bed. After putting his food on the side table, he ran back downstairs to get a bottle of water from the fridge. She'd probably be thirsty when she woke. He'd make her something to eat if she was hungry, but he'd wait and see. No point making anything yet.

Back in her room, Ryan sat on the floor and picked up his sandwich. He took a bite and chewed slowly. The urge to wake Claire, to see that she was okay, kept him from rushing his meal. The longer his hands were occupied the longer it would be before he reached out and shook her awake. His sandwich and drink were finished, and still she didn't stir. He couldn't decide whether he should disturb her sleep or not. She didn't look sick and there was still no sign of fever, so he made the decision to leave her for now.

He took his plate and empty can downstairs to the kitchen. The wash cycle had finished, so he pulled the clothes from the washer and dumped them in the drier. Wandering around the house he made sure the doors and windows were locked before heading back upstairs to bed. He crawled in next to her and hoped his mind would rest enough to sleep. Lord knows his body was tired, but his thoughts kept circling around this thing with Claire. Today had proven one thing to him; he was in way over his head where she was concerned. Now he just had to figure out how deep he'd sunk.

*****

Claire woke to a dark room and warm breath in her ear. Ryan lay curled along her back, his arm draped over her waist. They touched from neck to feet, and she couldn't help her body's response to his closeness.
When had they taken their clothes off?
Heat churned low in her belly. Her nipples tightened, and her pussy grew moist. A shiver traveled down her spine, and goose bumps broke out on her skin. She wiggled her bottom, and his hard cock pressed into her soft flesh.

Ryan's hand moved up to cup her breast. His hot breath bathed her neck as his lips planted wet kisses on her skin. Ripples of need flowed out, darting off in all directions to converge in her core. Her pussy clenched, and her hips bucked. His erection slid into the valley between her ass cheeks to rub along sensitive nerves. A groan vibrated against her shoulder. He squeezed her breast, his fingers plucking at her nipple and his length thrusting against her. Claire arched, driving her hips back, pressing her ass into his groin and her chest into his hand.

"Let me love you," he murmured in her ear as he nibbled a path along her jaw.

"Please."

Saying "No" never entered her mind. This was Ryan, and it felt so right being with him that Claire couldn't ignore the messages her body sent her. It didn't matter what her mind said about them being together, her body knew no one could give her what Ryan could. He sucked her earlobe into his mouth and bit down, the sharp sting of pain zinging its way to her pussy, drawing moisture from her depths.

He pulled away and a cry of disappointment left her throat. She needn't have worried. Ryan rolled her onto her back and eased himself on top of her, his body covering hers, touching her, surrounding her. Claire sighed in relief, the pleasure of being pressed into the mattress by his weight one she would no doubt crave forever. His mouth took hers in a slow lush kiss. Lips and tongues slid and stroked, tangled and teased.

Claire wrapped her legs around Ryan's hips, and his cock slid between her slick folds, the hard shaft applying pressure to her aching clit. Her inner muscles clenched, squeezing out more moisture to cover them both, lubricating the slide of heated flesh on heated flesh. Their hips pumped, the glide of their bodies aided by her cream. She moaned into his mouth as sensation splintered in her pelvis. Pulses of delight fired out, connected her throbbing flesh with ribbons of pleasure. As their pace quickened the ribbons pulled tighter, stretching her nerves until the only thought in her mind was getting Ryan inside her.

Ryan's mouth continued to devour hers, and Claire's need grew stronger, sharper. She angled her hips and raised her knees so the head of his cock came to rest at her opening. Using her thighs, she pulled him into her, the crown stretching her as his shaft sank deeper. He broke their kiss and stared at her, his eyes glazed with lust, as he drove himself to the hilt. Her muscles clamped around him, gripped him within her body in a wet grasp that drew a groan from both of them.

He pulled out in a slow torturous motion that had her clawing at his back to urge him faster. But Ryan wouldn't be hurried; he drove forward at the same pace, retreated, advanced. With steady thrusts, he took her. His gaze never left hers. This wasn't sex. He was making love to her; the raw desire of their previous encounters was no longer as harsh. She shook her head, closed her eyes. Tried to deny what he was telling her with his body. His hands came up to hold her face, and she opened her eyes to see emotions she didn't want to acknowledge swirling in his gaze.

Her eyes stung with tears she refused to shed. She leaned up, pressed her mouth to his, and kissed him deeply. Laced with desperation, the kiss turned rough. Teeth nipped, tongues stabbed, and Claire fought to keep control of the rioting emotions exploding inside her. Ryan took over, sucked her tongue into his mouth, and stroked it with his own. His lips played across hers, soothing her with every move. He drove his cock into her with the same unhurried pace, and she surrendered, melted beneath him, and let him have his way.

Giving in had never felt so good. Claire's body hummed with pleasure, every inch saturated with a bliss she'd only ever experienced with Ryan. His chest crushed her breasts, teasing her hard nipples into a frenzy of jangled sensations. The solid driving force of his erection as he impaled her again and again strummed cords of need in a rhythm as old as time, and yet surely this ecstasy had never been known before. With each thrust he pressed deeper inside her, touched places never before touched and drove her toward the ultimate release.

When her orgasm broke it wasn't full of lights and sparks or violent shudders. No, it was shattering in a far more devastating way. She trembled under him, her body clutching at his, pulsing and quivering as he found his own peak and came inside her. Each burst of come spilling deep in her core and drenching her pussy with heat. As she rode the waves of pleasure, Claire couldn't stop the tears leaking from her eyes. It was far too late to end this easily. With one explosive climax Ryan had shattered her soul and stolen what was left of her heart.

*****

Claire took the day off work. She had too much to think about, but most of all she wanted to get a head start on licking her wounds. Letting Ryan go was going to be the hardest thing she'd ever done. It would be selfish to continue seeing him when they had no future. Moping around the house didn't help. Her eyes and nose were bright red from all the crying. Her stomach hurt from lack of food, but she didn't have the energy or the desire to do anything about it.

She had to pull herself together before Ryan came over. The last thing she needed was for him to see her wavering. Her thoughts had gone back and forth all day. Whenever she thought she was making the wrong decision, the conversation with Adele came to mind and Claire knew, for his sake, she had to let him go. For both their sakes it was best to end things now, before either of them got any deeper.

Mid-afternoon Claire drew a bath. She tossed in her favorite bubble solution and put her favorite CD in the player. With the classical music filling the house, she undressed and settled into the bath for a long soothing soak. The warm water did wonders to relieve her achy body, but nothing to ease the ache in her heart or the pain in her head. It didn't matter how often she went over the why's and should's, or how many times she tried to argue with herself, she kept coming back to the conversation with Adele. Nothing would make that horrible exchange go away.