Always and Forever (43 page)

“I really don’t want any trouble.” I say, desperate to get
away from the two of them. I don’t know what their problem is but they’ve
obviously got me confused with someone else, someone who they’re mad at. I
can’t just walk away, they might follow me. My only hope is to delay things
until Jake comes back. He said he would only be a few minutes and besides, his
sister should be out here in a minute. I know Jake won’t let anything happen to
me. I just need to remember that, stay calm and think rationally.

“You don’t want any trouble? It’s a little too late for
that, little girl.” The blonde sneers at me.

“I don’t know what your problem is; I haven’t even met you
before.”

 My legs feel weak and begin to shake, I’m not sure if
it’s from the cold temperature outside or the fear that’s now heightened all
the senses in my body, preparing me for a fight or flight scenario.

“You really have no idea who I am?” She asks me, the icy
tone in her voice sends another shivers down my spine. This girl is ruthless
and I hate the way she’s looking at me, it’s as though she could destroy me
with in one swoop.  

 “I don’t.” I answer truthfully, despising the
condescending way she’s talking to me, it’s as though she knows something I
don’t, something she truly can’t wait to tell me.

“I’m Jake’s girlfriend.” She grins at me victoriously,
savouring every word and delighting in the horrified expression on my face.

 I inhale sharply, trying to remain calm. Did she
really just say she was Jake’s girlfriend? That can’t be true. No, it’s not.
It’s not true. Jake wouldn’t do this to me. He loves me, I know he does.

“You’re lying.”

I sound much braver than I feel. Inside, I’m crumbling. On
the outside, I’m calm and composed. I suppose I really have learnt a thing or
two living with my father, he made me an excellent liar and a convincing
actress.

“Oh, you didn’t know?” Her eyes widen in mock surprise, a
triumphant sneer on his beautiful face.

“Why
should
I believe you?” I challenge her, folding
my arms across my chest.

I shouldn’t have to stand here and listen to this, I should
just run away. I’m not wearing heels and they’re both wearing stilettos, I
could surely outrun them? My mind tells me all of this but my feet won’t
cooperate and remain glued to the ground.

“I’ve always known about you, Jake and I have been together
a long time. The last few months have been hard for us; he needed some space
and time to get over what I did to him. He needed to get his own back, he
wanted to punish me. It’s only because I love him so much that I tolerated his
need to experiment and his slight interest in you. He wanted a virgin; he was
curious and wanted to see what it would be like. I’ve just spoken to him inside
and he sent me out here to tell you that you can go now. He’s finished with
you, little girl. Your… services are no longer required.”

 The girl standing next to her bursts out laughing,
forcing a wave of nausea to wash over me. I feel unsteady, weak and horrified.
I’m not even sure if I have the strength to stand. If I didn’t have a malicious
audience thriving on my downfall right now, I’d have fallen to the ground
several minutes ago. I grab hold of the wall behind me, holding onto it for
support. Sarah watches me closely, her eyes gleaming with a vindictive
satisfaction.

The last few weeks with Jake flash through my mind and I
can’t help questioning if there’s any chance this girl could be telling me the
truth. Could every glorious moment I’ve spent with Jake be one huge lie? The
girl standing before me is absolutely gorgeous. She’s tall, slender, tanned and
she has the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen. Her blonde hair falls gracefully down
her back and the dress she’s wearing only accentuates her enviable body. The
truth is, there is no comparison between us. I’ve always know how extraordinary
Jake is, I’ve been utterly ridiculous to think for one moment that Jake would
really settle for such an ordinary, insignificant girl like me. Why would he
when he could have someone like her?

 She notices my hesitation and the flicker of doubt
she’s managed to ignite. Emboldened by my weakness, she saunters over towards
me, leaving little space between us. I can smell the alcohol on her breath and
I can’t help but cower away from her. There’s something venomous about her,
something really malicious. I’ve never been the victim of such cruelty before,
only with my father.

“Stay away from me.” I try to sound fearless and bold, only
it comes out as a plea instead.

“You didn’t
really
he was actually interested in
you, did you? Come on, look at him and then take a look at yourself. The idea
of him wanting you for anything more than a fuck is hilarious. I suppose I can’t
blame you, I bet you were thrilled when you thought a guy like Jake wanted you.
Did he tell you that he loved you? Did he tell you that you were special? You
need to learn that guys will say anything to get a virgin into bed. I’m sorry
if he hurt you, Sweetie. Although, you have to admit you’ve been pretty
gullible. I mean, have you looked in the mirror lately? It’s laughable to think
that he would ever choose you when he’s had me all along. ”

Her words sting like a million slaps to the face. I don’t
want to believe the things she’s saying but it’s like she’s voiced my deepest
and darkest insecurities about Jake. My relationship with him never made much
sense, he’s breathtakingly handsome and I’m… forgettable. Has this really all
been a game to him? We had sex for the first time five days ago. I can only
imagine how easy he thinks that makes me. 

“I don’t have to listen to this.”

My eyes are brimming with tears, forcing me to turn my back
on her and her snickering friend. I start to walk away, incapable of listening
to another word from her. Fuck Jake and this stupid party, he’s left me out
here all alone, how could he do that to me? I only manage to take three steps
before the friend catches up with me, preventing me from getting past her by
blocking my path.

“Where the fuck do you think you’re going? You think I’m
going to just let you walk away when you’ve been fucking my boyfriend?” She
sneers contemptuously, grabbing hold of my wrist and spinning me around to face
her.

 “Slut.” The friend whispers, standing behind me.

“I can understand Jake, he’s a man and he gets bored
easily. He wanted to experiment and try something new, whereas
you
need
to pay for what you’ve done.”

She smirks at her friend behind me, both of them laughing
at my expense. I’m trapped, there’s no way I can escape this now. She’s going
to make me stay here and listen to everything she has to say. There’s still no
sign of Jake and every time I look at the house I can feel my heart break just
a little bit more. He’s in there right now, he knows I’m out here by myself and
he hasn’t returned. Is he really laughing at my expense? Is he boasting about
his latest conquest to his friends? Is he laughing at the silly little virgin
for opening her heart to him? 

“Look, I just want to go. You can have him, I don’t care. I
just want to leave.”  I tell her, making sure my voice is completely
devoid of any emotion. If I manage to convince her I don’t care about Jake, she
might just let me go. She’s already getting off on the fact that she’s hurt me;
I don’t want her to know how deeply she’s wounded me by her revelations.

“I told you, there’s no way I’m going to let you walk away
from this. You’ve underestimated me, little girl. You think I’m just going to
let this go? You have no idea what I’m capable of; you have no idea about the
ways I’m going to make you sorry.” Her cold, scornful eyes travel down my body,
sizing up her competition.

“I’ve had enough of this. If what you’re saying is the
truth then you can have Jake. I don’t want him but I do want my phone back, you
have no right to take it.”

I can scarcely believe the words coming out of my mouth.
She’s so much taller than me, she’s so much tougher than me and she has her
damn friend with her for backup. This girl could easily hurt me so why the hell
am I antagonising her? I suppose the reason is a small part of me just doesn’t
believe what she’s saying. I remember the softness of Jake’s voice when he
tells me that he loves me. I remember his eyes and how they sparkle whenever he
looks at me and my heart remembers the connection it feels to him when he’s
standing before me. No matter what this girl tells me, I refuse to let go of
those things until I know for certain she’s speaking the truth. I need my
phone, it’s my one link I have to Jake and I’m not ready to turn my back on him
and say goodbye. I want answers and I want them from him.

“Oh, I’m sorry! I forgot all about your phone.” She
exclaims, holding her hand out to her friend behind me.

The girl hands it over to Sarah and she offers it to me. I
hesitate, wondering what her game is. Surely she wouldn’t just give me my phone
back? That would be too easy.  I hesitate for a moment before making a
grab for it. Of course she’s too quick for me and snatches it out of the way
behind her back. They both laugh at my expense and I can feel my cheeks burning
with shame and humiliation.

“You give up? You don’t want to try again? Come on, I’ll
close my eyes this time and make it easy for you.” She offers my phone to me
again, closing her eyes.

I’m sick and tired of this bitch and her vicious mind
games. I’m inwardly screaming for Jake to hurry up and save me. Where the hell
is he? Why hasn’t he come back for me? I can’t believe he would abandon me like
this, Jake wouldn’t. Something must have happened to him and the only way I can
find out is if I get my phone back. I’m not leaving without it.

“God, she’s stupid.” Her friend mutters, harshly poking me
in the back and pushing me forwards into Sarah.

Sarah pushes me back and I fall back into the friend’s clutches.
Oh, no. I can see where this is going. They continue to push and shove me back
and forth, squealing with delight at how easily it is to toy with me.

Desperation once again forces me to look in the direction
of the house. The music that’s playing has quietened down and I notice people
finally seem to be leaving. They’re exiting the front door and dispersing,
giving off the impression that the party is drawing to a close. Internally, I’m
praying that Jake comes out with them

“You’re still waiting for your knight in shining armour?
I’ve already told you that he’s finished with your boring, pathetic self. You
really are more desperate than I thought. He lied to you. He told you what you
wanted to hear, he fucked you and now he’s bored. He loves me, we’re together
and it’s going to stay that way. What Jake and I have is beyond anything you
could ever imagine.”

Hearing her talk about being in a relationship Jake is like
having a dagger plunged into my heart. I’m at war with myself, I don’t know
what I should and shouldn’t believe and I have no idea how I should handle the
situation. I’ve never encountered someone like her before, as school there were
bitchy girls but they always left me alone. I was no threat to them so they had
no need to torture me. I start to wonder if that’s why Sarah is treating me
like this, could she really be threatened by
me
? Surely only jealousy
could provoke such a merciless, unnecessary act of cruelty like this?

I stare up at her, utterly speechless. She’s hurt me beyond
belief and I’ve taken just about enough from this girl and her spiteful
gloating. My self-preservation finally kicks in and I decide to respond to this
girl with the same contempt she has shown me. I might not be able to beat her
in any fight but I sure as hell can fight back.

“If what you’re saying is true then why did Jake make love
to me last night?” I ask.

 She jerks her head as though I’ve slapped her. The
colour drains from her bronzed face and I’m thrilled to see she doesn’t look
half as smug as she did a moment ago.

“Made love to you? Don’t make me laugh. I’ve already told
you it meant nothing to him. I’m the one who he wants, it’s always been me.
I’ve already say that I can understand Jake; I know who he is and I know what
he’s like. He now realises what’s important and that’s me.”

“If you’re who he wants then how come I don’t know anything
about you? Until tonight I had no idea you even existed.”

 She turns red with rage, narrowing her eyes at me.

“What Jake and I have
is special. You don’t know the
first thing about our relationship or what we’ve been through! He was hurting
and I don’t blame him, he made a mistake. We’ve both made mistakes but we’re
going to make it right. We can fix everything!” She yells, clearly on the edge
of despair and I’m shocked when I notice the tears rolling down her face.