Always (Wesson Rebel M.C. Series) (14 page)

Never Let me Go

Rowan

I open my eyes, reach for Danny and find his side of the bed cold. I’m
not surprised. He’s always been an early riser. But given everything that’s going on, I’m worried. He never said shit last night. He spent himself in my arms. My pussy gives a delicious twinge at the memory. I loved it, but it does nothing to clear the air. I push up into a sitting position and sigh. This is the worst case scenario. Danny “Sampson” Wesson at the helm of a ship he never wanted to command. I scrub my face with my hands and swing my legs over the side of the bed. We’re healing now, regrouping and planning. For the millionth time, I curse Wesson and their rules. I won’t know shit until we’re suddenly thrust into a lockdown.

I understand the rules for the whores. They don’t need to know shit, but Wesson women, the old ladies, we can hold our
water. They say it’s to keep us safe, but that’s bullshit. There’s no such thing as honor among thieves’. Other MC’s give a fuck about the women not knowing anything. They want to hurt you, so they go for your heart. Irritated as fuck, I huff, blowing the hair out of my eyes. It’s going to be like dating a spy. The times of sharing everything were over. He would live two lives, the one with the club and the one with me. I bow my head. This isn’t what I wanted, or what we promised each other. He always told me I came first, Wesson rules be damned. Now, it will all change.

Past

“What are you hesitating for, Ro? We’ve been together since we were fifteen. I’m patched now and it’s time to make you my Old Lady.” Danny’s brow furrows and his eye glaze over with confusion.

“You don’t get it.”
I stand from his bed and walk toward the door.

His hands wraps around my
bicep, and he yanks me back. “So, explain it to me, Rowan.” His voice has an edge and his eyes are narrowed.

“The patch changes everything. You’re not a free agent anymore. They’re going to come first and secrets are going to start building up
between us.” I shake my head. “I don’t know if I can do that with you.”

He gives me shake. “What the hell are you talking about?
This is how it goes and you know it.”

“
I know, I know and I understand. But I love us how we are, I don’t want to change. I can’t sit back and watch this disintegrate. I’d rather make a clean break.”

“Are you out of your fucking mind
, little girl?” He charges forward like a moose.

I break away in a
zig-zag pattern. I can’t let him catch me because I know he’ll remind me of all the reasons why I should stay. The thought of watching him grow hard and distant is too much. I’ll break—shatter into a million pieces. He’s my first love. A strong, loyal, sweet man. Different from any other member I know.

They’ll steal that away from him, suck out his innocence and replace it with obedience, turning him into another soldier in the W
esson army. His father is the P and they’ve always expected more of him. I’ve seen what that’s done to his old brother, Dallas. That poor man never had a chance at normal. He lives in a state of confliction that’s tearing him in two right before our eyes. The boozer and the women he’s running through, like he has a death wish have nothing to do with the club lifestyle. 

I won’t watch Danny become that.

He snatches me up around the waist. “Calm the fuck down, Rowan!”

I struggle, then
flinch at the harsh tone. He never talks like that to anyone, let alone me.

“You thought what? You’d drop your b
ombshell and walk out while I sit here like a pussy? This isn’t a fucking soap opera.” He flings me onto the bed.

The breath leaves my lungs in a rush.

“Now, sit your ass down and start explaining.” He crosses his arms over his massive chest. His jaw is clenched and his nostrils are flaring.

Now,
for the first time, I’m actually intimidated by his large frame. “What’s there to say?”

“Everything. Why this scares you so much.” His gaz
e softens. “You’re not a runner, Ro, so why start now.”

“Self-
preservation. I can’t watch you lose yourself in this.”

“Who says I will?” He shakes his head. “You and I have always been different. Why would that change now?”

“Because that’s what being a patched member does. Look at Dallas. You’re not just another member, Rule is your father. Being the Pres’ son—?”

“No. Don’t you put that on me. My father and Dall
as’ issues are their own. It’s a monster made between the both of them and they feed it until it’s grown ravenous and fat. It consumes Dallas. But that was never me. I never gave a shit about pleasing the man, because I think it’s impossible.” He shakes his head. “You really think I’d forget what we’ve built together, Ro?” He kneels in front of the bed and takes my hands. “Together, we have made a safe place where Wesson isn’t allowed to enter. When I come home to you, I leave all that shit outside. You are my heart. I will never let anything come before you. Will I always be able to tell you everything I’ve done? No. But you’re used to that. We can do this.”

“Danny
…” My voice cracks.

“Don’t leav
e me alone in the darkness Ro, you’re my light. You always have been. I can’t do this and remain the man you love…without you.”

His word wounds me. I can’t contribute to his fall.

“I promise you, Ro. You will always be my top priority. Whatever I have to do to keep you, to keep this will be done.” His eyes are glossy with unshed tears.

Right now,
he’s so raw and honest I know he means it. Danny is a man of his word, always has been. I’m choking on unshed tears, fear and uncertainty. I’m shaking so hard, I feel like my bones are going to break away. If I commit to this—there’s no out for me.

“Rowan?”
His eyes are pleading with me.

The sight
of this strong man brought to his knees by the thought of my departure is the slap to the face I need. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” I drop my head and stare at our hands joined in my lap.

He frames my face with his hands and lift
s my head to meet his gaze. “We are
forever,
Rowan. I said that shit when we were sixteen when I made you mine for the first time and I meant it.” He moves forward slowly and captures my lips. “Forever.”

The whispered words send a shiver down my spine. He nibbles my bottom lip and flicks the sensitive area with his tongue, c
oaxing me to engage. He breaches my lip and captures my tongue—and I’m lost. I give in to the inevitable.
Danny Wesson and I are forever
. Even if I walked away, no one else could ever hold my heart the way he does, or understand who I am beneath all the layers I wrap around me to protect myself.

He spreads my legs wide and my skirt rides up to my waist. He trails his fingers over my panties, rubbing my swelling clit through the soft material. There are no words
, only our gazes holding each other, our bodies feeling and the repairing of the connection that lives between us.

My heart
is thudding in my chest like I’ve run a marathon.

He pushes my panties aside and circles my entrance.

I clutch at his thick, blunt fingers with my pussy, craving more. My energy has shifted and I’m aching to burn it off.

Pulling away
, he grabs the sides of my underwear and rolls them down. I lift my hips to help.  He brings the black material to his nose and inhales deep, humming his approval. Heat engulfs me from the tip of my ears to the bottom of my feet—this man sets me ablaze.

Even with his size, Danny is graceful. I watch his muscles flex as he strips down and comes to me
with his thick dick in his hand. He strokes it from root to tip and my mouth waters with the urge to taste the milky beads of liquid trailing down his mushroom shaped head. He gives a slight shake of his head. He wants to be inside me now and I want it too—badly.

We’ve weathered another storm together
and I need to reconnect, to feel that closeness only he can provide me. I crawl back on the bed and he follows. His fingers grip my hips and he drives home. My walls wrap around him and I’m full. I grip his shoulders as we move together. He’s slow and thorough, grinding his hips into mine as he bottoms out over and over, making this sweet climb to the top. My toes curl into the bed and I match him stroke for stroke. Sweat rolls down between the valley of my breasts. I wrap my legs around his waist and he moans. His back is slick and his skin is hot to the touch.

Our eyes never stray as we communicate on the most basic level.

Sparks of pleasure began to erupt. My walls tighten and the pressure reaches its peak. I convulse.

He cries out moments later, filling me with all he has to give. He collapses on top of
me, taking the most of his weight on his forearms.

I welcome the weight.

“What are we, Rowan,” he whispers.

“Forever.”

“And don’t you ever forget it, baby.”

Present

The memory draws tears. I stumble out of bed to the bathroom. I don’t want him to see me like this. He has enough on his plate. It’s time to put my wants on a shelf. Wesson has taken control, like it always does sooner or later. This life is all I know, but sometimes…I hate it. Beneath the spray of the shower, I let my tears fall as I mourn for Rule who is now gone, what could’ve been and what might never be. Dallas look ravaged when he rode away and deep down, I’m terrified he’s never going to come back. The devastation his leaving forever would bring is horrifying.

How long can Danny keep the crown? What will it do to him? There are plenty o
f people who want to be on top. They’re lurking in the background waiting for him to fuck up. My mind goes to Scar. It already takes a firm hand to keep him in line. What happens if Danny can’t? Then what? Last thing we need is a bloodthirsty asshole on the loose, unchecked. We have enough to deal with. The blowback from Rolling Bones has yet to trickle down and the boys already want to ride back out to avenge, Rule. It’s a turbulent time and for once, I’m not sure how Wesson is going to weather.

My thoughts return to my best friend. I haven’t had a chance to see where her head is right now. That
robo shit she pulled yesterday was bullshit, but I let it slide, because Danny needed me more. Now, her ass is about to be in the hot seat. With my mind focused on something I can actually help with, I finish up my shower. I then put on a pair of blue jeans and white tank top. I slip on a pair of flip flops, grab my wallet and phone, then walk outside to find the club looking like a ghost town.
Must be in Church.
I nod at the prospect milling around and head outside. The sunshine feels good on my skin. I narrow my eyes blinking as I adjust to the drastic change in lighting. The air is lighter out here and I hurry to my truck, eager to get away from the clubhouse.

I pull up in front the house that used to be home
and a sense of unease settles in. I climb out and walk over to the door, almost hesitant to use my key to enter. The awkwardness makes me wince. I should’ve called her more and kept up with her. College had been an escape. We forgot about Wesson for a while, pretended to be normal, did the shit normal college kids did, and distanced ourselves. In that process, we’d lost something. I place the key in the lock and push the front door open. Everything looks the same on the surface, but there’s an emptiness as if the soul of the home has fled.

Tiny feet pound across the pavement with Cora right behind. I see the hope in her brown eyes when they round the corner.

“Wo!” R waves his chubby arms and barrels into my legs.

I bend down and pat his back. “Hey
, buddy.”

He’s grown so big since we’ve gone. Whe
n you’re talking infant to toddlers, six months is a lifetime. He went from this tiny bundle of cuteness who nuzzled at you to a little man. We’d done face time, Skype and the occasional visits. But I wasn’t prepared for the miniature Dallas standing in front of me. His dark brown hair is a faux hawk and his eyes are large innocent looking green orbs. I don’t think I can remember his father’s ever looking like that.

“Hey,” Cora says.

Her lackluster greeting makes me frown. “Hi. I came to see how you were doing.”

R
releases my legs and toddles back down the hallway to the playroom. We follow him at a slower pace.

“I’m fine. We’re fine.”

“Really? Is that why you can’t even look at me?”

“What do you want me to say, Ro?” She shrugs.
“I just came back from seeing my father. It kills me to see him so weak, struggling to gain every facility back he lost in an echo of gun fire.”

Ro dropped her head. “I’m sorry
, Cora. I know it’s not easy, but he’s alive, and fighting. That’s amazing.” I glance at her, not about to let her hide behind the tragedy we’d all been through. “I still know you. There’s something more. Don’t keep everything bottled up.”