An Unexpected Hunger (19 page)

“Please…I just want to forget about it right now. Come to bed.”

“I can’t.”

“Ricky,” I said, patting the space next to me. “Come to bed.”

He stood for a few seconds, his hands planted on his hips, before crawling into the bed with me. I nestled in beside him, hooking my legs between his.

“Pretzel legs,” I teased. But the frown on his face didn’t budge. “Hey.” I planted soft kisses on his neck. “Let it go.”

Ricky’s eyes met mine, so dark they were almost black. “If anything ever happened to you…I would loose it.”

“Nothing
’s going to happen,” I said, making my way to his lips. “I promise.” I pulled him on top of me, as he trailed his mouth down my neck.

For the next half h
our we were both able to forget. When I felt his body tremble over mine, I tried not to think I made a promise that I might break.

* * *

Three weeks had gone by, and eventually my mom hung the phone back on the wall. Every time I walked by it, I expected it to ring…but it never did.

Even though it was my night off, Nick was picking me up to take me to the Mug to see Ricky play. He hadn’t hired anyone new yet
, and I grown a small fondness of my new job. Cesar was happy to share the kitchen with me, and we even sat down together a few times to discuss new items on the menu. Working at the Mug was the perfect way to ease back into the kitchen, and being so close to Ricky didn’t hurt either. He didn’t mention anything more about Danny after that night, and I never brought it up again. I finally started to believe he had gotten the message and gave up ever trying to contact me.

“So
, how are your classes going?” I asked Nick as he drove to the bar. I dabbed a little gloss on my lips and puckered them in the mirror.

“They’re fine. Boring as shit,” Nick shrugged. “Mia’s been on my ass about studying.”

“That’s good,” I said. “You need to graduate before you turn thirty.”

“Very funny.”

“So, how are things between you two, anyway?”

He waited a while to answer. “Fine.”

“Fine? That doesn’t sound too confident.”

He sighed. “Things are good…really good. Sh
e’s the best thing in my life.”

“Awwww,” I teased. “You’re in love!”

His cheeks turned crimson.

“Shut up,” he said, rolling
his eyes. “Anyway…how are things with Ricky? He never shuts up about you when we hang out…
when
we get to hang out.”

I leaned back in my seat, lifting the visor back up. “Things
are really good. I’m really happy right now.”

“That’
s good to know,” Nick smiled. “Cause I really like the guy, and would hate to have to beat him up.”

It made me smile to think Nick cared so much.

The Mug was packed as usual when the boys played. I winked at Ricky on stage as I made my way to the kitchen to check on Cesar and Mike.

“Don’t you ever go anywhere else?” Mike joked as
he dropped fries in the fryer.

“No. Then I would never see you.”

Mike only worked two nights a week, and it was usually on my days off, so we never worked together. He piled the hot fries into the basket, and I stole the few that had fallen on the counter. He playfully smacked my hand away.

I found a seat at the bar with Nick and we both order
ed a few drinks. Mia dodged from one side to the other, her new trainee trying to keep up. He was so tall he had to duck under the glasses hanging overhead to talk to customers. Nick freaked when he heard the new bartender was a guy, but I thought it was high time that we got some more male eye candy in here. Too much estrogen in one place is never a good idea.

I took a few shots with Nick
, and he was surprised when I ordered a couple more. I had been feeling good the last few weeks, and I wanted to celebrate.

“Easy now,” Nick said when I ordered another round.

“Who’s the babysitter
now
?” I teased.

I slung the shot back and leaned against the bar, watching Ricky on stage. He
was hunched over the drums, every muscle in his upper body flexing. I loved watching him play almost as much as I loved watching
other
people watch him play. Once in a while, I’d notice women approached him after he was done. They would twirl their hair or force out a giggle, trying to lure him in with just one look. He would ignore all their attempts for attention. I always found him the sexiest when he walked away from them and headed towards me, his smoldering charcoal eyes locking on me the whole time.

“Mia!” Nick called. “Mia! Come here for a sec!”

She held up her pointer finger, and Nick huffed and puffed when she didn’t immediately come running.

“Calm down,” I said
. “She’s working.”

Nick raised his eyebrows. “I don’t like the look of that guy.” He nodded towards the new bartender.

“Jesse? He’s harmless,” I hiccupped. “Oops.” I hiccupped again, and it sent me into a fit of giggles.

“Jesse
,” Nick scoffed. “Isn’t that a girl’s name?”

“No…it’s bisexual.”

“You mean unisex?” Nick said, raising an eyebrow.

“Whatever,” I replied, still hiccupping.

Nick chuckled. “Oh my God…you’re completely wasted. That didn’t take long.”

“No, I’m not!” I said, highly offended. “Oh, shit.”

Ethan walked through the door and spotted me, stealing away ever last giggle I had left.

“What’s he doing here?” I asked Nick.

He turned around to see who I was talking about. “To get a drink. Why else would he come to a bar?”

I pretended
, in the most ridiculous way, not to notice him walking towards me, hiding my face with my hand.

“You know he can still see you
, right?” Nick said.

I peeked through a few fingers
.

“Hey,
Alexa.”

The jig was up.

“Ethan…how nice to see you!”

“Can I sit here?” He gestured to the empty stool next to me.

I smiled. “Sure! Why not?” I looked down at my watch. Ricky had another twenty minutes before he was done.

I introduced Nick and Ethan
, and we all ordered another round from Jesse. I kept my back to the stage, hoping I could disappear among the crowd. It was enough Ricky was pissed that a guy across the country was trying to talk to me; Ethan was just a couple of inches away.

“They sound good!” Ethan shouted.

I nodded my head.

He leaned in close to my ear, so close I could feel his breath on my skin. “You look good tonight.”

I nodded my head again. “Thanks.” The room swayed back and forth. “So do you.”

He did a double take at my comment
, and I cursed the alcohol for betraying me. It wasn’t a lie though…he did look good.

“Another drink?” I asked.

I don’t know how I managed it, but I was able to throw back one more shot. It was the one that put me over the edge. I was leaving wasted behind, heading straight toward incoherent.

“That’s my limit,
” I slurred. I stumbled back into Nick.

“Damn Alexa
,” Nick said. “You’re such a clumsy drunk.”

Ethan held out his hand
, and I grabbed it. He pulled me back towards him, and helped me settle into the stool.

I refused to look in Ricky’s
direction, and I didn’t have to. He was watching our every move, and I was hoping Ethan wouldn’t cross whatever invisible force field Ricky had constructed around me.

Ethan seemed conte
nt to just listen to the music. It was too loud to have any kind conversation anyway. Nick was in another world, watching Mia and Jesse’s every exchange. I glanced down at my watch one too many times, counting down the minutes until Ricky was done playing.

The minute the music stopped, Ethan leaned in close to my ear again. “I was thinking…we should go out again soon.”

I opened my mouth to speak, but was interrupted by someone.

“
I think you need to find another place to sit,” Ricky said from behind me.

Ethan took another shot. “Oh yeah? And why is that?”

“Ethan-” I mumbled.

Ricky tugged on my arm. “Come on Lex. I want to head home.”

“Home? But it’s still early,” I said.

“Yeah, Ricky,” Ethan instigated. He stood up from the stool, no doubt feeling over confident with a little help from Jack Daniels. “I’ll give her a ride home.”

Ricky’s jaw clenched and his fists were balled, the veins in his forearms throbbing. “Lexy.
Let’s go
.”

I got up from the stool, concentrating hard on not toppling over. It seemed like the more I focused the more I wobbled.

“So, that’s it?” Ethan said to me. “He says jump and you say how high?”

I felt the knock of
my stool against my hip as Ricky stomped towards Ethan, Nick barely holding him back.

“What the fuck is your problem man?” Ricky said.

Ethan took a few steps back as the load roar of people around us quieted down.

“Hey man…she’s all yours,” he said with his hands up in surrender. “
She ain’t worth the trouble.”

Ricky lunged toward Ethan, Nick trying his best to keep him in his place. Too bad for Ethan, no one was holding me back, giving my fist a chance to meet his face.

Ethan stumbled back as I shook my fist, waiting for the radiating pain to subside. It seemed like the whole bar froze, Ricky and Nick staring at me with mouths wide open.

I pushed past the crowd and headed outside, needing some fresh air. My wrist ached and my stomach was doing flips. By the time I made it out of the bar, the murmur of the crowd
was restored.

I sat on the curb, letting
the chilly air sober me up.

“How’s you
r hand?” Ricky asked, sitting beside me.

I held it up for him to see. “It hurts like hell.”

Ricky inspected it carefully. “Yeah…punching some one in the face will do that.”

I laughed. “He deserved it.”

“Glad I’m not the only person who thinks so. Ready to go?” He got up from the curb and held out his hand.

“Don’t you want to hang out with your friends?” I asked as he hoisted me up.

“Are you sure you don’t want to leave?” he replied.

“I’m fine if you are.”

“Good,” he smiled. “Cause they all want to buy you a drink.”

I BRUSHED MY teeth and tied my hair back. Looking in the mirror, I stared long and hard, thinking about Ethan’s words from the other night.

S
he ain’t worth the trouble
.

Trouble.

I’ve gone my whole life trying to avoid it, only to find myself in the middle of it all the time. My mom always said I was an obedient child. Nick was the one giving her problems all the time. I got good grades in school, had lots of friends, and even played an instrument. In high school, I didn’t drink, I never did drugs, and thanks to my ability to ward off Ricky’s attempts, I managed to hold onto my virginity until after graduation.

After my dad died,
I had done plenty of staring into the mirror, wondering what is was that I had done to deserve what had happened. I had done everything right, played it safe. But still, it wasn’t enough to prevent the bad things from happening. That’s when I decided to stop trying. Involving myself with Danny was the crème de la crème of behaving badly. How naïve was I to think I actually knew what I was doing?

I turned away from the mirror
, and leaned against the vanity, watching Ricky undress.

“I need a shower,” he grumbled, peeling off his
shirt. He just returned from the gym, and I wrinkled my nose as he wrapped his arms around me.

“Yes,” I said. “You definitely need a shower.

“Want to join me?”

I declined, having already taken a shower when I got home from work. Ricky pouted for a few minutes before giving up
, and headed to the bathroom. I flopped on the bed, and felt an immediate relief in my feet. I flipped to the Food Network and watched as Paula Deen whipped up something that made me drool.

“You could
do that,” Ricky said, drying his hair with the towel.

“Do what?” I asked. “Make fried chicken?”

“No. Have your own cooking show.”

“You’re crazy,
” I laughed.

He laid down on the bed next to me. “I’m serious,” he said.

“How is it that you believe in me so much?” I asked.

Ricky shrugged. “Because I love you.”