And Then You Dance (Crested Butte Cowboys Series Book 2) (7 page)

Are you hungry?
He texted her at eight. If she were, he’d get take-out and have it ready for her when she got back to the apartment.

She answered.
Are you still here?

Yep.

Why?

Because I want to be, he thought, but he wouldn’t answer her. And he wouldn’t get into a text argument with her. He was staying, and that was the end of it. He looked through her kitchen until he found the drawer with the takeout menus. She thought she knew him so well, but he knew her too, better than she thought he did.

All these years Renie thought he hadn’t been paying attention. He got that now. But he had been. Who didn’t pay attention to their best friend? He recognized the meaning behind every look. He knew what her texts meant, even if they consisted of one word. He was able to fill in enough blanks to finish her thoughts.

He hadn’t noticed until now how often she’d kept him at a distance, under her terms. Renie came to him, when she wanted to. She stayed, when she wanted to. She put up with his shit, when she wanted to.

Billy wondered why Renie hadn’t invited him up here before. They could’ve hung out, gone to the places she liked to go. He would’ve been happy to sleep on her couch. But, she hadn’t ever invited him up, and he hadn’t ever invited himself, until last night.

He decided on Thai food. They had a favorite Thai place they went to in Colorado Springs sometimes. He’d get her favorites.

When Renie unlocked the door to her apartment, she was met with the overwhelming aroma of Tom Ka Gai. If she hadn’t already loved Billy most of her life, she would have fallen in love with him right then.

It was ten degrees outside, and she walked a mile from her class to her apartment. She was frozen to her core and chicken-coconut soup would thaw her out better than anything.

“I’m glad you’re still here.”

“Because you’re happy to see me?” He helped her take off her jacket, leaned in, and kissed her. “Or because I have dinner waiting?”

“Both, I guess.”

“You guess.” He wound his hand around her neck and pulled her closer to kiss her again. Her nose was like an ice cube, so he kissed it too.

“Come and eat,” he said. He pointed to the sofa, and when she sat down, he threw a blanket over her. “Get warm, I’ll bring the soup to you.”

“Who are you and what have you done with Billy Patterson?”

“I never do anything for you. Is that what you’re trying to say?” She was right. She did a lot more for him than he did for her.

“What have you been doing since I left?”

“Nothin’ much. Had some calls to make. Took a little nap. Tried on some of your clothes.”

She smirked.

“So you are listening to me? You look a million miles away. Whatcha’ thinkin’ about pretty girl?”

She had been lost in thought, wondering how long he planned to stay, how things would be between them now. It would’ve been easier if he’d been gone when she got home tonight. It would’ve given her time to process this drastic change in their relationship. That was precisely why he hadn’t left. He didn’t want her to make any decisions without him there.

“You and me,” she answered.

“And?”

She didn’t know what to say. She had no idea how to do this. She’d dated, but no one long enough to get serious enough to sleep with them. Which meant she’d never been in a relationship.

He watched her, waiting for her to say something. She took another spoonful of soup. And he smiled. Billy Patterson had the best smile. Those dimples, his soft blue eyes…Renie imagined he got away with an awful lot in life by playing his smile card, as he did right now.

She took another spoonful of soup, and smiled back.

“I don’t know whether I love you because you’re such a brat, or despite it.”

She stopped smiling.

“Oh come on Renie. You know I love you. You love me too. Don’t ya? Doesn’t matter that things have changed for us in the between-the-sheets department. That’s not what I’m talkin’ about.”

He was right. They did love each other; they’d been part of each other’s lives forever.

“You’re right.”

“So…come on, tell me what you’re thinkin’.”

“I can’t do that Billy.”

“You always make me go first. Okay. I will.
Again.
”

She set her empty bowl down on the coffee table.

“You want more soup first? Or are you ready for Pad Thai?”

“I can wait. I want to hear what you have to say first.”

Billy stood and took her bowl to the kitchen. Now that he’d offered to go first, he had no idea what he would say. He knew how he felt; he didn’t know how to put it into words.

When he came back out of the kitchen, her eyes were closed. He’d give anything to be able to read her thoughts. He’d spent most of his life wondering what Renie Fairchild was thinking. Now he knew why.

“I’ve never done this before either.”

She opened her eyes and raised her eyebrows.

“The girlfriend thing, I mean.”

“Girlfriend?”

“Relationship? Is that better?”

“Not ever?”

“Come on. If I had, you would’ve known about it. I would’ve talked to you about it.” He was glad he never had. But then, there hadn’t been any women in his life worth talking about.

When he was on the road, plenty of women were interested in keeping him company. But, he almost never slept with a woman more than once. There had been a few here and there, girls who followed the riders from rodeo to rodeo, but they never lasted longer than a week. He wouldn’t let them travel with him, and when they gave him shit about it; he walked away and never looked back.

“Maybe I had more important things to deal with, more important things to be doin’. You don’t win a national championship if you’re not focused.”

She still wasn’t talking.

“I want this with you,” he said softly, almost a whisper. It wasn’t like him to be quiet, or still. Billy rarely stopped moving, but he sat next to her, so still.

It spilled over to her. It was that way between them. They shared feelings.

“Do you want it Renie?”

She did. It’s what she’d always wanted. But now that it was a possibility, a reality, she wasn’t sure she could do it. What if it didn’t work out between them? Then what?

“Fuck Renie, answer me.”

She jumped at his drastic change in tone. “I don’t know.”

Billy got up and started to pace. “Why the hell not?”

“What happens Billy if it doesn’t work? We
have
to take that into consideration.”

He sat back down and pulled her into him. “Tell you what, we’ll be ourselves, be the way we’ve always been, but let’s see where bein’ intimate takes us.”

“I have to think about it Billy, without you here.”

“Nah, if I’m not here you’ll get weird about it. Like you did with Pooh.”

“What do you mean?”

“You moved her. What the hell was that all about? You think I was gonna let you get away with doin’ something like that?” He laughed and shook his head.

“No, I guess not,” she laughed too.

“I’m goin’ home in the morning, which means I’m gonna sleep here with you tonight. And when you come down this weekend, you’re gonna sleep with me.”

“What if I don’t come down?”

“Then, I’ll come back here.”

“Don’t you need to get back out on the road Billy?”

“Not ready yet.”

Renie fidgeted on the sofa, moving further away from him. “Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.” He ran his hand through his hair. “Yeah, I guess I do. My heart isn’t in it. I can’t explain it any better than that.”

“Hmm.”

“What’s that mean? You got an opinion, which you always do, don’t be shy about tellin’ me what it is.”

“The best thing would be for you to get back out there. The longer you don’t, the easier it’ll get for you to convince yourself you’re done.”

“What about us?”

“You can’t use ‘us’ as an excuse Billy. Get back out there. Ride. Compete. It’s what you do.”

“Don’t wanna.”

“Get over it Billy. Turn your attitude around.”

“What about us?” He asked for the second time.

“Again, we aren’t an ‘us.’ Get back out on the road and do what you do. I’ll be here when you get back.”

“Come with me.”

She’d been to many rodeos Billy competed in, but not because she was there for him, or with him. He asked her to go once, the year he won the national finals in Las Vegas. But, he hadn’t really invited her; she and her mom went more as part of the family.

“I can’t Billy. I’ve got too much work to do here. I have labs due, and I have to study. This gets harder every year. And as much as you have to focus, so do I.”

Billy abruptly stood and pulled her up with him. “I want your body next to mine Renie, and I want it now.”

“Billy—”

“Now Renie. Don’t argue with me.”

He kissed her lightly. “I want you,” he whispered. He put his hands on the small of her back and pulled her closer to him, his tongue licking over her lips, her breasts pushed into his body. He shifted to bring her pelvis into his.

She made a sound, a whimper, and kissed him back. Her hands came up and ran over his chest. She was so tender, so loving. It almost brought him to tears. She had so much love within her for him it spilled out through her lips, her hands, her pores. Renie breathed love for him.

“I want to be inside you,” he murmured. His lust for her overwhelmed him. He put his arm behind her knees and carried her into the bedroom.

He set her gently down on the bed, and before she moved away from him, he unbuttoned her shirt. His hands moved to her wrists and undid the buttons there. Lifting her, he pulled her arms out of it. She had a turtleneck on. His hands reached under it, but instead of pushing it up and over her head, his hands found her breasts instead. Her nipples were hard, through the sheer fabric of her bra. He pulled at it, and put his hands on her skin.

Renie put her hand against his cheek, her fingers trailed down to his neck, inside his collar, and over his collarbone, over the scar there. He’d broken it, nine years ago. She remembered. She remembered everything about him.

His hands still on her breasts, he stared at her. She closed her eyes. And then she smiled. Billy moved to take her turtleneck off. He’d run out of patience. He wanted her naked against him.

He reached around and unfastened her bra; she shimmied out of it. His lips found hers, and he kissed her as he kneed her legs apart. His mouth left hers and traveled to her neck and then her shoulders. He licked over her collarbone, as she had run her fingers over his. His lips found her nipple, and he sucked it in. She gasped and arched against him.

He groaned as he switched to the other breast, teasing her with his tongue. Her hands moved to her jeans, and she started to unfasten them. His hands stopped her.

“I want to do it,” he said, lifting himself away from her. His hands finished what they stopped hers from doing, dragging her jeans down her long legs. He slid down further and put her legs over his shoulders. Her hands went to his hair as he rested his head against her. He nuzzled her, breathing in deeply and groaned again.

Renie lay there, still, almost holding her breath.

His mouth trailed kisses over her, “I want you to fall apart for me Renie. I want to watch you fall apart.” She gripped the sheets and did as he asked her to.

Renie continued to watch him as he stood and took off his clothes. He reached behind her where she saw he left a box of condoms on her headboard, right next to the picture of them. It brought a smile to her face.

“Stocked up today,” he said as he ripped one open.

“I want you,” she murmured.

Billy’s jaw locked, his shoulders tensed and his gaze went from heated to scorching. He drove into her hard and fast while she continued to watch his determined face. She saw everything in his face. Billy loved her.

When they came together, it emptied her mind of any thoughts other than how it felt to be this close, this inseparable from him. She held onto him, refusing to release her hold. His gaze came to hers as he held her as tightly as she held him.

She’d be tired the next morning, but he couldn’t stop himself from waking her throughout the night. He’d drift off, but then her body next to his would wake him again. He couldn’t sleep through his body’s pull to her. He wanted to kiss her everywhere. When he trailed kisses down her side, from the soft skin under her arm, down her waist, to her hips, she giggled. When his lips moved across her pelvis, she groaned. He loved the sound of her—giggling, groaning, screaming in pleasure. He wanted all her sounds, all her love, all her everything.