Angela's Salvation (20 page)

Angela was stunned at the amazing passion he'd given her, and even though her body was a little sore at being taken so forcibly, she had never felt anything as incredible in her life before.  She didn't understand why his eyes were filled with such horror, or why he was backing away and pulling his pants back up, she needed a few minutes to understand what had just happened. 

She wanted to tell him that what they'd shared had been the most fulfilling experience of her life, but her mind was still too overwhelmed.  Sitting up, she stiffened slightly at the unfamiliarity of being loved so incredibly.  The look on his face made no sense to her, and she felt the slight chill of the conditioned air for the first time since he'd shown her how much passion he'd been holding back.

He wanted to kick himself in his own balls over how he'd hurt her, and knew she probably never wanted to be anywhere near him again.  She'd been violated her entire life, and he was supposed to be someone she could trust, he thought with self-hatred.  What kind of man would do that to this beautiful woman, he thought.  "I understand if you hate me Angela, please believe me when I say I'm
sorrier than I can ever express."

She didn't understand what he was talking about, and looked at him in stunned confusion.  He regretted what happened, that was about as obvious as could be from the look of disgust he was throwing her way.  Suddenly the overwhelming, incredible experience he gave
her filled her eyes with tears.  She couldn't understand how he could love her so passionately and then regret the decision.  It was clear that he did regret it though, and it almost broke her heart.  "Just leave me alone, Nolan," she whispered needing to get away from him and control her emotions.  Grabbing her scattered clothing, she ran upstairs to the bathroom, locking the door behind her.

He wanted to run after her, beg her to forgive him for being such an inconsiderate ass.  But what could he really offer in a way of an apology.  He was little better than her stepfather for what he'd done to her, and it was obvious she was terrified of him now.  She deserved to be treated like a princess and he'd done the complete opposite.  Pulling his cell phone out of his pocket, he knew that the best thing he could do for
her was get out of her life.  He called his security team and arranged for them to protect her here.

He was fucking broken, his mind screamed internally.  She needed a tender lover that had the patience to show her how beautiful making love could be, not the monster that lurked inside of him that needed to conquer the body of the only woman he'd ever loved. 
He felt tears of regret slide down his cheeks.  No good for her, he reminded himself how worthless he truly was.

She deserved so much more than his demented ideas of passion.  He would never forgive himself for the pain he caused her, and knew the best thing he could do was gi
ve her the freedom from him she needed.   He arranged to have her things brought here, and for a driver to pick him up. He wrote her a note and left it on the kitchen counter with his car keys, telling her again how sorry he was, and that the car was hers.  He explained that her things would arrive soon, and that he'd have her friend driven out here when she arrived.  It was the very least he could do, he thought. 

He waited until the security team arrived, and gave them very implicit instructions on protecting her at all times.  Never again would he darken her door, he decided, and if she pressed charges against him for the violation then he knew it was nothing less than what he deserved.  As he drove away from the cabin, he hoped only that one day she'd be able to forgive him.

Standing underneath the streaming hot water, she tried to understand how something so incredibly beautiful had turned so cheap and ugly.  Nolan had made her feel things she'd never thought to feel and it had been so astounding her knees were still shaking.  He had to have experienced it too, she thought in confusion, and for him to regret it just made no sense to her at all.  Scrubbing her somewhat sore body, she tried to understand but all she could see was that he regretted what they'd done.

As the water started to cool, she stepped out and wrapped herself in an oversized bath towel.  Maybe it was because she was so in love with him that it meant more to her than it did to him, she contemplated.  She wasn't experienced, and maybe she'd done something wrong, she thought miserably as she dried off.  She realized she didn't have any other clothing here, and slid back on her tank top and bra, along with the short mini-skirt.  Her underwear was completely shredded, and the sight made her eyes fill with tears.  Not because it bothered her that he'd ripped them off, but because she knew he'd never touch her that way again.

He owed her an explanation, she thought in frustration, intending to walk downstairs and demand he tell her just what she'd done so wrong.  When she arrived there was no one but Lenny, and she looked at him in confusion. "Where's Nolan?" She hoped her voice didn't sound as panicked as it felt.

"He had to go back to the city, Ma'am," Lenny smiled warmly at his new charge.  "He left a note on the counter."  He had no idea why there was such a mess in the kitchen, and worried that his boss had hurt the young woman.  "Is everything okay?"

Angela picked up the note and as she read, tears flooded down her cheeks.  Stepping over the broken glass she shook her head as his words sank into her heart making the ache multiply knowing that what they'd shared meant nothing to him.  "I need to clean this up," she whispered to herself, lost in her own world of misery.

"Don't you worry about that Ma'am, you take a seat and I'll have this fixed up." Lenny had no idea what had happened, but judging from the pain on the young woman's face, Nolan Fitzgerald needed his ass kicked.  He'd seen someone in shock before, and as she walked out of the room he knew that young woman was hurting.  He searched in the cabinets until he found the utility closet and pulled out a broom and dustpan.  He quickly cleaned up the mess and called his boss on his cell.

"I don't know what you did to that young woman, but you hired me to protect her, and it seems to me she needs protecting from you."  Nolan might pay his salary, but he refused to stand by and see anyone he was taking care of be abused.

Nolan was shocked at the tone of the security guard he'd hired, and normally he would have fired him for such insolence, but the guilt he harbored changed his attitude completely.  "Just make sure she's safe, and you don't have to worry I won't be coming around again."  He gave the guard no time to answer as he hung up the phone, needing to collect his own thoughts over what he'd done.

Lenny could only guess what had happened between the two of them, and after he righted the kitchen, he walked into the living room and found Angela sitting on the couch staring at seemingly nothing.  "Ma'am if you need me to call law enforcement just say the word."

At his words, she looked up at him in shock. "I don't think the police care that we just broke up."  She had no idea what she was saying, her heart was shattered at the moment and she just needed some time to get her head right.

"Ma'am, forgive me for overstepping myself, but if he hurt you in any way, you need to press charges."  It was pretty apparent that whatever had happened in the kitchen wasn't some quick breakup. 

"He didn't hurt me Lenny," she gave a half-smile, "not unless you count a broken heart."  She wasn't sure why she was telling this man all these personal truths, but she needed someone to talk to.

"But the kitchen, it was destroyed," he'd seen a few domestic cases in his time in the service, and this fit the bill perfectly.  "Protecting him if he hurt you, won't make him get the help he needs."  He'd never understood why some women felt the need to protect their abuser.

It finally dawned on her that he thought Nolan had fought with her, and the idea was so ludicrous, she laughed without humor.  "Um, we weren't fighting in the kitchen Lenny," her face heated at the explanation she was giving and hoped he got it because she didn't feel very comfortable saying more.

Understanding moved over his features, and he relaxed.  Considering the arrangement of the broken glass and food, it made perfect sense especially judging from the blush on her cheeks.  He was a little embarrassed now for bringing it up.  "I'm sorry for assuming anything else."  He wondered why Nolan hadn't told him off instead of giving him the 'I won't be coming around again speech' now.

"You couldn't have known," she was still amazed at how heated their lovemaking had gotten, and felt her cheeks heat even more.  He'd left her his car, and apparently the house, and she could only assume that he was glad to be rid of her.  She wished Rachel was here, she'd understand what had gone wrong.

"I need to go over the security schedule if you have a few minutes Ma'am," he could tell she was embarrassed and he had already overstepped his professional limits in his opinion.

Forcing herself to come out of her depressing thoughts, she nodded her head. "Please have a seat," she could do this, she told herself.  She wasn't a little girl anymore, and if Nolan had decided he didn't want her, then she would just have to suck it up and move on.  It wasn't like she hadn't known worse heartache than this in her life, she told herself.

Lenny perched at the edge of the couch, and pulled out a small pad from his pocket.  "Mr. Fitzgerald wants 24 hour surveillance.  I'll be at your disposal anytime, but there are three shifts of security officers that will maintain the perimeter of your home."

"Lenny, I honestly would like to just trust your opinion with this, because to be honest I know nothing about security."  She didn't feel at the moment she had the capacity to work out anything in her mind yet. 

"That's fine Ma'am, and you can rest assured that you will be safe.  I'd like to introduce you to your team, so you'll know who's working for you though?" The last thing he wanted was some crazed fan pretending to be a member of his team.  That had happened on one of the first security details he'd worked on and the results had been disastrous, he would never let it happen again.

At her nod, he stood up and ushered the other three men inside.  Walter, she knew from Nolan's home and Lenny explained he'd be working the morning shift from seven until three.  Crawford was in his early thirties, and reminded her of some guy on her favorite cop show, he was taking over the three to eleven shift.  Jimmy was a lot younger than what she expected, but she was told he had a military background and she didn't doubt he was capable after hearing his references, he would handle surveillance from eleven at night until seven the next morning.

"
They'll be stationed outside, but if anything unusual occurs, they will have to breach the inner home as well," Lenny explained confidently.

"I trust you to take care of things Lenny, and thank you all for being willing to take care of me," Angela gave a small smile, feeling overwhelmed at the idea of having these men protecting her.

"It's our pleasure, Ma'am," Jimmy gave a curt nod, "if you have any concerns, even a prank phone call we hope you'll let us know immediately.

"I'll do that, and if any of you need anything from me, just let me know.  I'm not used to all this, so honestly I don't know how these things work."  That was the understatement of the year, she thought, trying to pull her mind away from her relationship with Nolan.

"If we're doing our jobs right Ma'am, you won't have to worry about anything." Crawford said with a quick smile.

"I'd like to walk through the house with the other men and get better acquainted with the property if that's alright?" Lenny wanted to know every nook and cranny of this home before he would feel confident about keeping her safe.

"Do whatever you need Lenny, and thank you gentleman." She hoped the smile she gave was friendly as they went about their task.  It was definitely going to take some getting used to, having all these people around, and also feeling comfortable in what was now her new home.

Angela didn't really know what to do with herself after the security team left, and she wandered around her new living quarters trying to take her mind off Nolan leaving.  When Rachel finally arrived several hours later, she threw herself into her arms.

"Holy hell I missed you too, but that's some welcome," Rachel hugged her back tightly.  The driver brought in all their things, including all the bags she'd left at Nolan's house.

"Did you meet him," she knew asking about Nolan was just going to make her break down again, but she had to know.

"Fitzgerald?" At her nod she shook her head.  "Yeah, he was a little different than what I'd thought, asked me to take care of you and said if we needed anything to let him know."  She definitely been expecting some jerk with an attitude, but the man she'd met seemed quiet and reserved.

"Is that all he said," she hoped beyond hope that he'd told Rachel something about why he'd left the way he had, even if she was a stranger to him.

"Nope, I only spent a few minutes with the guy helping to get your stuff together.  So what's up with the house?"  Rachel eyes roamed over the incredible cabin, amazed at how fancy it was.