Anno Zombus Year 1 (Book 8): August (3 page)

August 6
th
Year 1 A.Z.

morning

The sun greeted us by warming the interiors of the cars that we had chosen to sleep in considerably, so we all piled out at around about the same time.  Now, everybody hates a cold breakfast of baked beans, so Apocalypse Girl pulled out a lighter and built a small cooking fire, making sure she showed Machete the proper way to go about it with minimal pain and burning.  The small blonde girl, having been playing her new gaming system until late in the evening, when the batteries had run out, paid attention but yawned in a combination of both boredom and weariness.

After feeding time, we meandered back downstairs in a leisurely fashion.  Apocalypse Girl had made up a batch of coffee which was at least attempting to contain my own yawns, though seeming to fail miserably.  I'll be honest, Machete wasn't the only one indulging in her new toy last night.

By the time we arrived at the ground floor doorway between carpark and shopping centre, we considered exactly how we were going to get through.  Deathwish suggested slamming through the glass with something heavy, say a backpack full of baked beans, which seemed almost like the only option when Jester pointed out that he could, with a little help, find his way to the backup generator for the shopping centre itself, which no doubt would provide power to the doors.  Deathwish looked positively scandalised when we the rest of us all unanimously agreed with Jester's idea on the basis that he was not a complete loony with a bag full of fucking baked beans, but he offered to help provide an escort for the little guy.  I just had to promise to look after his beans.  I was beginning to wonder about Deathwish...

So, I waited at the doorway with Apocalypse Girl, Machete and Tiny.  Butler, naturally, had to go with Jester, with Scout, The Twin and Apprentice rounding out the group in case they ran into a wall of the Dead.  Apocalypse Dog, torn between the two groups, chose to stay with us, returning from trotting after the departed to place his head in Machete's lap, whining forlornly.

The plan had been to wait for Jester and his escort to return before we headed inside but a moment after the power came back on and the lights flickered to life a small army of Dead shuffled out from behind automatic doors that had been sealed shut for the last seven months.  The four of us were, consequently, having a hard time remaining in the same place.  Soon enough, however, the Dead lay still and quiet and we moved inside quietly, blades and skillet at the ready.

noon

We hadn't gone far, didn't really have any need to yet, just made a kind of barricade between the rows of shops on either side that Machete and I took turns defending until Jester and his escort returned.  Butler had a large red smear on his very white shirt, other than that there was no evidence that they had any troubles whatsoever in getting the electricity running.  Jester was even whistling when they strolled through the doors, picking their way past the dead Dead we had left.  Butler clucked irritatedly as he dragged the carcasses out into the carpark.  When he returned he was furiously attempting to wipe some red from his glasses with some limited success.

“Shouldn't there be more Dead?”  Deathwish wondered aloud.  I realised that he had asked precisely the same question floating around in my own brain.  A few had tried to get past the barricade.  A dozen at most.  It was disconcerting, to say the least.  I had expected to be greeted by hundreds, perhaps even thousands of the things.  A couple of Dead shambled around a corner and past a shop that had once sold CDs and, after a moment to process the information in whatever passes for thought patterns in Dead brains, began heading more or less in our direction.  One had what looked like a fishing spear dangling from its jaw.

Luring them in closer, it appeared as if the spear had been planted there only recently.  Slicing into their heads, I thought no more of it.  Jester was already suggesting that we head first to the security office.  That should have monitors showing us what was going on in the rest of the centre, he reasoned, which will give us a better overall picture of what had been happening.  Not to mention there was likely an up-to-date floor plan with details on every single shop and store in the place, as well as a set of keys that will make exploration a damn sight easier.

Deathwish smiled when the decision had been reached.  “Hey, I know right where that is, too... got hauled in there more than a few times as a kid, you know.  Shoplifting, that sort of shit.”  Jester suggested that he had stolen the entire world supply of baked beans from them.  Deathwish grinned.  “Nah, I've never stolen food, just some jewellery and fancy stinky candles and shit to impress some girl or other.  Don't even really remember the details now.  Don't suppose it even matters anymore.  She's probably Dead by now.”  Clearly he was full of shit, it mattered to him and he wanted to know what had happened to her.  He had just resigned himself to the fact that he would likely never find out.  Not now.  He led the way to the security office in silence, slamming the heads of the few Dead in his way with a hammer that was soon covered in a blackish red muck.

evening

The security office was, in fact, on the top floor, so it took us a while to get there.  Still, there seemed far fewer Dead than we had anticipated.  It seemed far too easy.  There was a Dead guard inside, as well as the rotting corpse of the one who had bitten him.  The guard fell easily to Machete's blade and Butler rifled through his clothing with a grimace, finding a single, solitary key that happened to unlock a weapon locker containing a few pistols and some ammunition.  These, we took gladly.

Machete found a small stove built so that the security guards on duty could cook for themselves and, excitedly, offered to cook for everybody.  Baked beans again.  How I longed for a fresh, juicy Meat-Beast steak.  While she cooked, Jester examined the monitors and computer systems.

“By the look of things, I could probably open up every shop in the entire place from here, you know,”  Jester was saying around some piping hot baked beans.  “It'll be a damn sight easier than trying to find the Dead guard with the keys, cause he is out there, somewhere.  Up to you though, really.”  He said, indicating me.  I told him that I'd sleep on it.  One thing I really liked about this security office; it had several rooms to it, all of which contained incredibly comfortable furniture.  Apocalypse Dog had already claimed one couch as his, though he was willing to share, as long as you didn't mind a doggy tongue exploring the inside of your ear while you slept.

August 7
th
Year 1 A.Z.

morning

The monitors showed nothing untoward this morning, though we kept careful watch as we cooked and ate some more of Deathwish's seemingly unlimited supply of baked fucking beans.  Jester apologised out of the blue, an instant before his silent, yet deadly brown wind struck, rendering all olfactory senses thankfully inert as the sounds of several days' worth of beans passing through each one of our digestive tracts thundered across the security office.  Machete and Scout could barely contain their giggles, losing their shit entirely when Apocalypse Girl casually lifted a cheek and practically tore a virtual, stinky hole through the couch upon which she sat.

“What's that?”  Apprentice asked, pointing to one of the monitors.  “I could have sworn I saw movement...seems like there's nothing there now, at least!”  Dead swarmed and shambled across many of the screens.

After a short while gathering ourselves together and setting up the security office as a kind of headquarters, with Apocalypse Girl and Machete keeping an eye on our supplies, Jester figured out how to unlock all of the various shops and stores inside this enormous structure.  His skill with computer systems was impressive, to say the least.  Butler begged him to stay behind at the security office, though he wanted to search for some quite specific things, Jester relented and agreed to stay behind once I told him that we would likely just be putting down the Dead today, maybe tomorrow as well.  Deathwish reluctantly parted with his massive backpack of beans.

Apocalypse Dog was torn between wanting to stay behind and wanting to go on an adventure with some of his
people!
This state was exacerbated by Machete slapping the couch next to her and Scout slapping her thigh.  In the end, he was distracted by his own tail, spinning around several times before falling to the floor and chewing his own arsehole.  We took that as our cue to leave.

noon

A few more Dead in the halls today, it seemed.  They fell as easily as ever, Deathwish accounting for no small number with his hammer.  “I always felt useless as part of the Scavenging Squad, you know?”  He told me, laying another Dead one flat.  “Knocking these fuckers on the noggin is way more fun than lugging massive amounts of fucking toilet paper around for Her Majesty!”

An hour or so into our excursion we found signs of the Living, traps that had been set for the Dead, a couple of security grilles that had been forcibly removed and replaced by makeshift barricades.  Campfires, even.  Abandoned, months ago by the looks of things, the number of Dead that remained caught in the traps.  There was, however, no signs of struggle, no massive amounts of blood covering the walls, floor and ceiling.  It looked as though whoever had been staying here had simply moved on.

Deathwish was fossicking through a nearby CD shop, grabbing albums from all of his favourite artists when Apprentice reminded him that all he had were empty cases, the actual discs were behind the counter.  So, over he hopped, landing atop a Dead one, lurking since the end of the world for some dinner to arrive.  Unfortunately for the Dead one, Deathwish's reflexes were far sharper, fuelled by adrenaline, and his hammer came down on the skull of the thing, smearing the remains of its brains all over.  Well, now at least I know why they gave him the name, if he is prone to doing stupid shit like that.  Hooting with the joy of success, Deathwish proudly held up the discs for which he had already found covers, proceeding to match them up as we looked around for some more Dead, or else some further sign of previous inhabitants.

Finding neither we waited for Deathwish to fill up a couple of bags before we started back to the security office.  A couple of Dead had shambled their way to block our path, but as usual, my katana made short work of them and before long we were safely tucked away in our temporary headquarters.

evening

Apocalypse Girl told me, once she had finally let go, that she had spotted movement again on the monitors, there was definitely someone darting around between several clothing stores it seemed, though she had also spotted something unusual in a speciality booze shop as well.  It seemed, as well, as though more Dead had somehow managed to find their way into the hallways, terraces and corridors of the shopping centre.

While exploring the office, Machete had discovered the key to the weapon locker, so we were all armed with an extra pistol each, except of course, Apocalypse Dog for obvious reasons.  I took a couple of sets of handcuffs for myself as well, you never know when they might come in handy.  Scout suggested a couple of ways that they could be used that had Apocalypse Girl blushing.

August 8
th
Year 1 A.Z.

morning

Apocalypse Girl shook me awake considerably more violently than I would have liked, pointing to one of the monitors while trying to talk around a mouthful of Deathwish's favourite.  On the screen a couple of Living people ducked and dodged through racks of clothing as an enormous horde of Dead shuffled in pursuit.  Scout and Deathwish had already bolted to their rescue, pausing only to ascertain the correct location, Apprentice following with Tiny and The Twin in tow a moment later, on the off-chance that somebody is bitten severely enough to require her specific brand of treatment on the spot.  Apocalypse Dog whined and pawed at the door leading from the security office to the rest of the centre, Machete standing beside him patting him on the head, trying to keep the dog calm, and herself as well.

Jester hopped down from the counter top with a big grin as Butler handed me my bowl of breakfast.  “I know, it's hardly a juicy, tender Meat-Beast steak, but it is still food, so tuck in,  alright?”  Bitch!  I'd been complaining about our all-bean diet as we attempted sleeping last night.  Butler looked concerned.

“These Meat-Beasts I've heard you talk about, would they look like a gigantic bush of flesh just sort of, how should I put this...?  Kind of rooted in place, usually in fields, open farmland, that sort of thing?”  I nodded.  Baked beans, fucking
yum
...  Not exactly my personal favourite any old time, but now... if I never see another can I'll die a very happy man!  I choked down my mouthful of condensed chemical warfare and added that they taste fucking wonderful.  I looked down at my breakfast, saw the vastness of it, the sheer enormity.  Sighing, I dipped my spoon in for more, silently wishing for something to add to it, anything really.  Some bacon, some salt and pepper even...  Grimly determined, I returned to my breakfast.

“They used to be cows,”  Apocalypse Girl said in a matter-of-fact tone while I chewed.  Butler's eyes narrowed.  Jester asked how she knew that.  “Because the first one we found fucking mooed at us, that's how!  Besides, this alien we met told us that a whole heap of species have been targeted for genetic alteration.  We figured Meat-Beasts were meant to be a kind of food source, either for us or maybe some of the other critters that have been changed.”

“Aliens, genetic engineering, you sound like crazy people, you know!”  Butler told us when I informed him that Fluffy had been the one to give us the information, but apparently another species was to be responsible for any changes to local wildlife.  On the screen a Dead head exploded.  Scout and Deathwish had arrived.  The bulk of the horde chasing the couple around shifted their focus to the rescuers.

Jester sat, thinking to himself for a while.  “I don't know, a year ago I would have laughed off the idea of the Dead coming back, trying to chew my face off.  I'm just interested to know what it meant when it said it had seen this sort of thing before.  Besides, where did that second moon come from?”  Having just shovelled another mouthful in, I simply nodded my agreement.  One of the pair being chased was cornered, the other shoving over a rack of clothes in an attempt to distract them.

It almost worked, maybe would have if not for another Dead, unseen by anybody but those of us watching in the security office.  It crawled under a rack of shoes, dragging its entrails behind itself.  As it reached out grasping, taloned claws to snatch at its unfortunate victim, she threw back her head and shrieked, loud enough to hear from up here.  The shriek turned to a scream of agony and despair when the Dead's teeth broke through the flesh of her ankle.

Her partner, all attention drawn to the now bleeding, screaming dinner bell, began belabouring Dead about the head with a rolling pin he had picked up somewhere.  The way he was holding it, the way it caved Dead skulls in, it must be
heavy
.  Gunfire erupted somewhere beneath us and the Dead on the screen exploded.  Apprentice ran onto the screen, diving through the smallest of gaps between the Dead, finally laying her hand on the girl's ankle.  A moment later, the screen went dark.  The result of a stray bullet, Jester reasoned, fiddling with what he could reach.

Nearly a minute later, on another monitor, Deathwish carried the girl, Apprentice still holding onto her wounded leg.  The way her mouth was moving, she was likely Chanting her little Healing song already.  Scout and The Twin brought up the rear, Tiny bolting past everybody with the injured girl's partner, each of them clobbering any Dead on their way back here.

noon

I don't think I'd ever seen anybody as ravenous as these two, and I've been chased by thousands of hungry Dead just wanting nothing more than to taste my flesh at least a couple of times now.  The way the former street kids not only wolfed down Deathwish's beans, but shyly asked for more before greedily chowing that down as well put me in a vaguely Dickensian frame of mind...

I asked Oliver if I could have a look at his rolling pin, he smiled, handing it over.  The fucking thing was made from solid marble and weighed nearly as much as Apocalypse Girl's Skillet.  Taking a couple of practice swings, I could truly appreciate the crushing power that it possessed.  I gave it back to him, turning to Twist to ask about her ankle.

“It feels fine now.  I didn't want to have to chop it off,”  She smiled her thanks at Apprentice.  “I've seen that happen a couple of times, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  Whatever your friend did while she was singing that silly song, I have no fucking idea, but before she started that my ankle was on
fire
.”

“Have you seen anyone else in here?”  Oliver asked us.  “We were part of a much larger group before...”  He looked vaguely guilty.  “Anyway, we busted in here, trying to get away from the Dead.  So, before too long there's way too many of them, way too many of
us
and so we,” he motioned to Twist, “decided to get the hell out.  They were talking some pretty fucking crazy shit, dude, like talking about eating people to stay alive.  The last thing I heard before we left the big meeting, someone was suggesting eating the Dead.”

“That was when we had to leave.  They had a pretty well fortified area, lots of weapons and stuff.  Access to a butcher as well.  It was all groovy for the first couple of days, but then the fresh food went bad, then we started running out of everything else.”  Twist put her bowl on the floor next to her.  Apocalypse Dog wasted little time.  “A couple of people went missing, just disappeared, you know?  Then they said they found some fresh meat.  About a day later they had the big meeting.”

“Yeah, we've seen them a couple of times since then.”  Oliver shuddered.  “They're not human anymore, that's for damn sure.”  He and Twist had both paled visibly.  “I don't know whether it's because they started eating each other or because they started eating the Dead and I don't want to know.  Just, when you're done here, promise that you'll take us with you, alright?”

Jester asked them how long they had been hiding out inside this complex.  Twist shrugged and told him that she had no idea, just that they broke in on New Years' Eve.  Having seen a few Dead-eaters in my time, I was loath to encounter these.  The first few we encountered had only been at it a week or two at most and they looked, smelled and felt
wrong
to the point that The Colonel had felt the need to exterminate them utterly.  I dreaded to think of the damage that seven months of dining on the Dead would do...

evening

Thanks to the gunfire and rushing around saving Oliver and Twist the Dead knew where we were now.  I had already been out with Machete a couple of times to clear out the hallway leading to the security office.  Fortunately we had cameras, so we knew when to act, but Oliver pointed out a few things in nearby shops that we could easily acquire and put to good use as barricades and traps for the incoming Dead.  Anything that impeded their progress kept us all alive a little bit longer, after all.

Oliver and Twist both took a pistol each from the weapons locker, Apocalypse Girl giving them the basics on how to hold, aim, load and fire the weapons, gently squeezing rather than jerking, and for practice they had plenty of slowed down Dead to choose from.  Neither was a particularly wonderful shot but together they were both learning and keeping the number of Dead encroaching on our little office down.

When darkness finally fell, we all took turns to tell our newest friends all about world events.  Apocalypse Girl told them about the world powers ever-so-intelligent decision to just nuke all the larger population centres in an attempt to eradicate the Dead, then Jester and Butler told them what befell Adelaide, its fall to the Dead and The Queen's resurrection of a dead city.  The Twin amused them with the tale of a blood-soaked couple landing on the doorstep of her commune and our flight from the escapees of the local jail.  Tiny told them of the early events in Queensland, then I told them of our encounters with mutated koalas, goannas and dingoes, not to mention the echidna.  Ending my tale with the news of a secondary moon and a couple of encounters with Fluffy and some strange Shadows, Oliver and Twist sat, patiently listening, assimilating the information as best they were able.  Seven months of that sort of news all at once is a lot to deal with, after all.