Antiques Swap (20 page)

I asked, “Wouldn't it be nice to be able to put our new car in the garage this winter?”

Mother thawed a little. “Well . . . perhaps it
is
time to put those things to use. To let the darlings come out into the world and thrive!”

Into our shop, anyway.

“Great!” I said. “But this does mean I'll have to cancel my call in to the producers of
Hoarders?
”

Straight-faced, she said, “I don't do guest appearances on rival shows, dear.”

“What show? We haven't heard a word in ages.”

The store phone rang on the counter in the next room, and I got up to go and answer it.

“Trash ‘n' Treasures,” I said.

“Brandy! Phil Dean.”

Wow, was our producer/director ever on cue!

“Oh . . . hi, Phil. What's up?”

“I finally have news about the pilot,” he said, the tone of his voice providing no clue as to its fate.

Would Mother be doing cartwheels, or confined to her bed in deep depression?

“The show is a
go!
” Phil exclaimed.

Cartwheels, then.

Me? I wasn't so sure.

Stay tuned.

 

 

 

Many vendors have a cash-only policy, so hit the ATM before you arrive at a swap meet. Don't be in a position where you miss out on a bargain because you're only a card-carrying shopper. Mother keeps a spare hundred-dollar bill pinned inside her bra just like Bret Maverick used to (of course, he had a thousand-dollar bill) (and no bra).

About the Authors

 

is a joint pseudonym of husband-and-wife mystery writers Barbara and Max Allan Collins.

 

BARBARA COLLINS
is a highly respected short story writer in the mystery field, with appearances in over a dozen top anthologies, including
Murder Most Delicious, Women on the Edge, Deadly Housewives,
and the best-selling
Cat Crimes
series. She was the co-editor of (and a contributor to) the best-selling anthology
Lethal Ladies
, and her stories were selected for inclusion in the first three volumes of
The Year's 25 Finest Crime and Mystery Stories
.

Two acclaimed hardcover collections of her work have been published—
Too Many Tomcats
and (with her husband)
Murder—His and Hers
. The Collins's first novel together, the Baby Boomer thriller
Regeneration
, was a paperback bestseller; their second collaborative novel,
Bombshell
—in which Marilyn Monroe saves the world from World War III—was published in hardcover to excellent reviews. Both are back in print under the “Barbara Allan” byline.

Barbara has been the production manager and/or line producer on various independent film projects emanating from the production company she and her husband jointly run.

 

MAX ALLAN COLLINS
has been hailed as “the Renaissance man of mystery fiction.” He has earned an unprecedented twenty-one Private Eye of America “Shamus” nominations, winning two Best Novel awards for his Nathan Heller historical thrillers,
True Detective
(1983) and
Stolen Away
(1991), and Best Short Story for his Mike Hammer story, “So Long Chief” (2014), completing an unfinished work by Mickey Spillane. His other credits include film criticism, short fiction, songwriting, trading-card sets, and movie/TV tie-in novels, including the
New York Times–
bestsellers
Saving Private Ryan
and the Scribe Award
–
winning
American Gangster
. His graphic novel
Road to Perdition,
considered a classic of the form, is the basis of the Academy Award–winning film. Max's other comics credits include the “Dick Tracy” syndicated strip; his own “Ms. Tree”; “Batman”; and “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation,” based on the hit TV series, for which he has also written six video games and ten best-selling novels.

An acclaimed, award-winning filmmaker in the Midwest, he wrote and directed the Lifetime movie
Mommy
(1996) and three other features; his produced screenplays include the 1995 HBO World Premiere
The Expert
and
The Last Lullaby
(2008). His 1998 documentary
Mike Hammer's Mickey Spillane
appears on the Criterion Collection release of the acclaimed film noir
Kiss Me Deadly
.

Max's most recent novels include
Ask Not
(the conclusion to his Nate Heller “JFK Trilogy”) and
King of the Weeds
(completing an unfinished Mike Hammer novel from the late Mickey Spillane's files).

“BARBARA ALLAN” live(s) in Muscatine, Iowa, their Serenity-esque hometown. Son Nathan works as a translator of Japanese to English, with credits ranging from video games to novels.

BARBARA ALLAN
is a joint pseudonym of husband-and-wife mystery writers Barbara and Max Allan Collins.

 

BARBARA COLLINS
is a highly respected short story writer in the mystery field, with appearances in over a dozen top anthologies, including
Murder Most Delicious, Women on the Edge, Deadly Housewives,
and the best-selling
Cat Crimes
series. She was the co-editor of (and a contributor to) the best-selling anthology
Lethal Ladies
, and her stories were selected for inclusion in the first three volumes of
The Year's 25 Finest Crime and Mystery Stories
.

Two acclaimed hardcover collections of her work have been published—
Too Many Tomcats
and (with her husband)
Murder—His and Hers
. The Collins's first novel together, the Baby Boomer thriller
Regeneration
, was a paperback bestseller; their second collaborative novel,
Bombshell
—in which Marilyn Monroe saves the world from World War III—was published in hardcover to excellent reviews. Both are back in print under the “Barbara Allan” byline.

Barbara has been the production manager and/or line producer on various independent film projects emanating from the production company she and her husband jointly run.

 

MAX ALLAN COLLINS
has been hailed as “the Renaissance man of mystery fiction.” He has earned an unprecedented twenty-one Private Eye of America “Shamus” nominations, winning two Best Novel awards for his Nathan Heller historical thrillers,
True Detective
(1983), and
Stolen Away
(1991), and Best Short Story for his Mike Hammer story, “So Long Chief” (2014), completing an unfinished work by Mickey Spillane. His other credits include film criticism, short fiction, songwriting, trading-card sets, and movie/TV tie-in novels, including the
New York Times–
bestsellers
Saving Private Ryan
and the Scribe Award
–
winning
American Gangster
. His graphic novel
Road to Perdition,
considered a classic of the form, is the basis of the Academy Award–winning film. Max's other comics credits include the “Dick Tracy” syndicated strip; his own “Ms. Tree”; “Batman”; and “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation,” based on the hit TV series, for which he has also written six video games and ten best-selling novels.

An acclaimed, award-winning filmmaker in the Midwest, he wrote and directed the Lifetime movie
Mommy
(1996) and three other features; his produced screenplays include the 1995 HBO World Premiere
The Expert
and
The Last Lullaby
(2008). His 1998 documentary
Mike Hammer's Mickey Spillane
appears on the Criterion Collection release of the acclaimed film noir
Kiss Me Deadly
.

Max's most recent novels include
Ask Not
(the conclusion to his Nate Heller “JFK Trilogy”) and
King of the Weeds
(completing an unfinished Mike Hammer novel from the late Mickey Spillane's files).

“BARBARA ALLAN” live(s) in Muscatine, Iowa, their Serenity-esque hometown. Son Nathan works as a translator of Japanese to English, with credits ranging from video games to novels.