Anywhere (BBW Romance) (6 page)

My chest puffed up. I swore to all t
he holy gods that I would do better to protect her. She gave me my purpose. I was to love her, to support her, to protect her, and to make her happy.

“Then never let me go,
aşkım.
” I hugged her, claiming her sweet mouth. Only a fool would turn away the love of a good woman, and I was no longer a fool.

Dropping down on one knee, I humbled myself to he
r, to this curvy goddess. “Marry me,
Ari.
Be my wife and have my babies. I swear never to hide the truth from you again. I will always protect you. I will do everything to make you smile every day of our forever. I want to love you beyond a hundred years if you will let me.”

I was a strong stubborn man. Nothing had broken me yet. I had killed men before, I had been sho
t at before, and neither had humbled me the way she did. She brought me to my knees. I wanted her more than I wanted to avenge my family’s deaths. I wanted her more than I wanted revenge. I wanted her more than I wanted air. The moment she spoke to me, she became my purpose, my reason, my every thing. I lived this life for her. Not for the C.I.A., not for Jorin, not for retribution against any international criminals, not for the citizens of this nation and others. I did what I did for her, and no one else.

And, no matter her answer, that would never change.

Chapter Ten

Two Years Ago
…

Aeren

“It’s my turn to pick the movie,” I reminded Ram.

He chuckled, coming to sit beside me on the sofa. “Yes, yes. What torture must I endure tonight?”

My jaw slackened in feigned offense. I harrumphed, shoving my nose into the air. “Just for that, I’m making you watch ‘
What to Expect When You’re Expecting
’. I had planned on watching it while you were out tomorrow, but now, that will be your punishment.” I poked his chest with my pointer finger.

He leaned in closer, draping an arm over the back of the sofa behind me. “Spending time with you could never be a punishment.” His eyes flickered with something akin to fire, passion. His gaze assured me he spoke the truth, or what he believed to be the truth.

I merely stared into his fiery depths. I could look at him for hours. His dark olive skin contrasted beautifully against his midnight brown hair. His five o’clock shadow seemed to frame his rose lips, lips that always looked kissable.

I fidgeted as heat surged through me, gathering at my apex. His energy, his warmth, seemed to surround me, to swaddle me and encourage the flames he’s innocently ignited.

Noting my flush probably, he stood and moved towards the entertainment center. “Where is this movie of torture?”

I expelled a quiet breath, struggling to re-direct my body and mind. “Um, on the kitchen counter, I think.” I chanced a look at him.

Dressed casually in grey sweats, hiked up at the bottom over his muscular calves, and a white t-shirt that was sheerer on him thanks to his darker complexion, his athletic figure was obscured and showcased at once. The man was sexy no matter what he wore, but like this was my preference. I knew so long as he was dressed for lounging that he wasn’t leaving yet.

Yet.

I watched him disappear into the kitchen, returning a few seconds later with the movie. He was studying the cover with interest, but he gave no hints as to his thoughts on it. I indulgently took him in as he bent and popped the disc into the DVD player.

With the movie case and remote in hand, he returned to my side. He pulled me against him and leveled the movie cover, depicting several pregnant actresses, before us. “This will be you with my baby one day.”

My heart skipped a beat. This was the first time Ram had spoken of a future together. I fought against my excitement, not wanting to appear overeager. I wanted Ram, but I’d never broadcasted it to him.

Angling to look at him, I narrowed my gaze and pursed my lips, semi-challengingly. “You do realize you have to sleep with a woman to get her pregnant, right?”

Humor lit his eyes as he cracked a smile. “Yes,
aşkım.
It works the same in my country as it does in yours.”

“Uh huh.” I faced forward again, relaxing against him once more. My mind was whirling. Elation and trepidation battled within me. “I guess I could give you one baby,” I conceded.

“Three.”

I spun
on him, my mouth ajar. “Three? What happened to one?”

“Two boys and a girl.” He spoke matter of factly, confident in the Universe’s plans. His eyes twinkled and a pleasant, happy expression lifted his features.

“I hate to burst your bubble, but it doesn’t work like that. If everyone got to choose what they had, the population would be very unbalanced in some countries. Plus, again, we have to have sex for you to knock me up.”

His smile turned predatory,
his irises visibly darkening simultaneously. “We will,
aşkım
. One day I will be free to enjoy you.” He brushed his lips across mine. His touch was feather lite, yet it had my libido raging in seconds.

I looked forward to that
one day
.

Chapter Eleven

Aeren

It’d always been Ram. From the moment I met him, I couldn’t imagine a future with any man but him. He became all consuming. To know the feeling, the experience, was mutual was a relief. After five years, I knew where I stood with Ram. I knew the truth, the good, the bad and the ugly. I had all the answers I needed except one.

“I
could never marry a murderer.”

His expression fell. His depths darkened, clouding the light present a moment ago.

“I could marry a man who protects himself, his countries and the citizens within them. I could marry a man who kills to protect the greater good, and that’s who I believe you are.”

His head shot up. “What are you saying,
Ari
?”

“I’m asking which man you will be tomorrow and the next day. I’m giving you one last chance to be
totally truthful.”

“I am not the man I was twelve years ago,
Ari.
I serve this country now, not a terrorist, and I will never go back. I am going to kill Jorin, though.”

“You can’t just kill someone because they hurt me, Rahmi.”

Anger flashed in his depths. “I know. He is planning more,
Ari.
We have gotten word that he is planning a bomb, and it is my job to stop him. I know Jorin, and the only way I can stop him is to kill him. There is no other way,
aşkım.
I have to murder him.”

“Under the provision of the C.I.A., right?” My stomach twisted in a ball of n
erves. My heart beat just a little faster, uncertainty wavering at my surface.

“Yes. Sam will be with me
on this mission. It is uncustomary, but, given my history with Jorin, they do not want me getting emotional and compromising what might be our only chance.”

I studied him, down on one knee before me. It had to be uncomfortable on the hardwood floors, but he didn’t fidget. He was strong and steady, consistent. “When do you leave?”

He stared at me quietly for a good half of a minute. “Tonight. We do not know how long Jorin is here, and must act quickly.”

My heart sunk. I’d just gotten him back and he was already leaving me. “How long will our lives be like this, with you constantly on the go, Rahmi?”

“Until you tell me to retire, that you can not take my absence anymore.”

“I could never do that.” I shook my head negatively. “This job, this lifestyle, is all you’ve known. You just told me that. It would be selfish of me to ask you to give that up for me.”

He froze, apprehension sharpening his expression. “What are you saying,
Ari?
”

“I’m saying I will never ask you to give up your career
or to choose between us. I love you too much to do that.”

He gave nothing away. “I am sorry I am not the man you want,
Ari.
”

I slapped his chest, my face splitting into a teasing, chastising grin, one that told him he was going to feel foolish. “I’ve known your lifestyle all along, Ram. I’ve never enjoyed letting you go, but I relish your return every time. I haven’t moved on to another man because you’re the only one I’ve wanted. I want to you, Ram
, as often as I can have you. I want to marry you.” When he just ogled me with this blank expression, I continued, “I’m saying a big, bold yes, Ram. Now get your ass up here and kiss me already.”

Rather than brighten, his gaze further darkened. “Oh, I am going to do more than kiss you, sweet
Ari.
” He rose up and hauled me against him, kissing me hard. There was a playful edge to his caress this time though. “You are mine now.”

I squealed, laughing as Ram grabbed my rear asset; squeezing it, he yanked me against his
swiftly stiffening cock. The action heated me from core to surface in one second flat. I moaned softly against his lips.

He fidgeted, but didn’t lose contact with me. He nibbled my lips, keeping my attention. A moment later, he slid something on my left right finger. “I have wait
ed years to give this to you.”

I broke away to look at it. “It’s gorgeous, Ram!” I gasped. I knew my eyes shone with awe at the three-karat diamond solitaire ring. It wasn’t fussy; th
e diamond was the star, the lone attraction. It was large and curvy like me. It was perfect. I couldn’t take my eyes off of it, locked in surprise. “I love it.”

He kissed the corner of my mouth. “I am glad you do.”

I threw my arms around his neck, hissing as my arm flared with fresh pain.

Frowning, he gently claimed my lips. “Come,
aşkım
, I will make you forget your pain.”

“Confident, are you?” I bit back a smile.

“I know what I am good at.” He winked.

I puckered my lips, considering him.
“You don’t know if you’ll be good at it with me. I’m not like other women.”

“And that is what I
love about you.” He kissed me again, drawing me deeper into him this time. “I will take care of you,
Ari.
I promise.”

My reply was a whispered, “I know.”

Ram had always taken care of me. He’d done the best he could, and that was what mattered. No one was perfect; I certainly wasn’t. Love is not easy. It requires that you do and be the best you can be for another person, even when you don’t feel like it. You do it out of affection; because you want to make their life easier, better, when they’re with you.

They may not always respond in kind; they will make mistakes, they will make you mad, they will test you and drive you to the edge, but they will never throw you over the cliff without being there to catch you.
Any man who forces you out of your comfort zone without the proper support doesn’t love you. A man who cares about you is hyperaware of your needs and your limits, and for that they deserve grace, not hate.

Ram deserved grace, not hate, for what was and what couldn’t
be changed.

“Trust me,
Ari
,” he pleaded, his lips further seducing me.

“I always have.” I thrust my tongue into his mouth, bolding backing my claim. I was willingly giving myself up to him.

Wrapping an arm around my lower back, he hauled me against him. His other hand cradled the back of my neck, careful not to touch the more tender areas. “I will never betray you,
aşkım.
Any man who tells you I have is a liar.”

I pulled back some, unable to ignore his statement. “Are you telling me that in preparation for it to happen?”

He met my gape head on, not relenting in his hold on me. “I am telling you so you know. You will never have to wonder with me again. No more secrets.”

Nodding in agreement, I repeated, “No more secrets.”

With one final kiss, he broke away from me. Taking a step to the side, he held out his hand. His eyes glittered with all I’d longed to see unveiled in them. “Come to bed with me,
aşkım
.”

Butterflies fluttered in my stomach. My pussy clenched in excitement, anticipation compressed my womb. I’d waited five years for this day. I deserved a medal for that one. I placed my left hand in his right. “Every night that you’re here.”
I beamed at him.

He
lifted the back of my hand to his lips and kissed it, keeping my gaze the entire time.

An unexpected wave of pleasure shot down my spine, blanketing me in fresh warmth and need.

Silently, he led me to the bedroom.

Chapter Twelve

Aeren

For one brief moment, apprehension slid through me. It’d been so long since a man had seen me naked. Then Ram kissed me tenderly and stated, “You are beautiful,
Ari
.” Before I could reply, he claimed my lips again, further silencing my insecurities.