Application of Impossible Things: A Near Death Experience in Iraq (6 page)

These are only a few examples, but they offer an idea of the range of interests represented by the thousands of beings. The tasks described presuppose a structure or network of innumerable physical-form vibrations or dimensions, as well as dimensions that function and are experienced purely as energy. Consciousness being present within and throughout all of them, in my understanding, is a prerequisite for their existence and function since consciousness both creates the ever-expanding presence of them and experiences awareness from within them.

The specificity of some of the tasks
wasn’t
held up against what we might consider to be larger, broader, or more complex tasks. Each was recognized as requiring different but equivalent levels of skill and expertise. For the most part, these beings were experts or masters of their fields and, again, “co-passionate” about what they were doing.

The personalities working on these various levels can’t be assumed to be overarching governing bodies although that might be a logical conclusion from within our conceptual understanding of structures. They are not some set of saints or gods manipulating realities. What I sense is that the personalities, while experiencing within their own and across many dimensions, could be understood as focused portions of their whole beings just as we are focused portions of our own expanded-awareness
Selves. They
are not the end or extent of possibility or examples of
advancement
of some kind, nor a step on a hierarchy. They are simply experiencing their own experience, which is distinct from ours, in a sense overlaps ours,
and
is of equivalent value to our own experience. There is a simultaneous infinity of other dimensional structures that co-exist across, through, over, under, and around their own.

My own awareness within the Blink Environment assumes the same expansive understanding of energy and “being” that these personalities exhibit. Some implications of that expanded awareness as it relates to our beliefs, assumptions, and actions in the physical world will be further explored in the following chapter.

Chapter 4 - Choice, Purpose, and Responsibility

The concept that I first communicated was that I was tired and had no interest in returning to the physical plane. I understood that the decision was mine, and at this point my decision was to end my physical existence.

Immediately after that, or perhaps more accurately folded within it, I presented what seems, from my current physical body/conscious mind perception, to be a transfer of information in the form of an inexplicably complex matrix. The information was minutely detailed and broadly conceptual—at once layered and infinitely dense, yet elegantly simple. It included events, thoughts, incidents, individuals, and groups in all their relationship complexities; stories, concepts, connections, nuances, layers, judgments, and projections. It included kinetic equations and dimensions and symbols and flows. Rather than being a classic life-flashing-before-the-eyes scene, this download was a collection that emphasized what might be very broadly understood as cultural and political information. I was aware that I deliberately offered the condensed data in fulfillment of a request that had been made by this Gathering of personalities prior to my taking on this body for this physical lifetime.

While the personalities digested the matrix I’d made available, I was again amused by the admiration that was sent back to me. They were clearly impressed not only with my Raiders of the Lost Ark appearance but also by the depth and breadth of information I was providing. Yet I perceived the task as an easy one and the information obvious, therefore, unworthy of admiration.

When the thought form or matrix had been absorbed by everyone, which took but seconds, discussions proceeded among the various groups and within the whole of the Gathering. This may seem impossible considering they were thousands, but it was not. No overlaps occurred, no interruptions took place, no misunderstandings formed, and disagreements were respectfully and thoughtfully engaged and resolved. All communication was accomplished through thought.

The first paragraph of this portion of my account contains significant implications.
Having read other accounts of near-death experiences, I’ve found that many of them describe some entity or figure stopping them from getting somewhere they wanted to go or telling them that they were required to return to the physical. Obviously my experience didn’t include an authority figure directing or curtailing my movements. Whether I returned to the physical or went on about my business elsewhere was entirely up to me.

Having that choice implies to me that free will is respectfully recognized in the environment. I can’t explain the fact that others are directed against
their will although
possibilities come to mind. It may be that those individuals retained some
habits of perception carried over from the physical waking consciousness beliefs, and the
authority sending them
back was either
a helper or simply their own voice of the Whole Self, whereas I knew immediately where I
was, wher
e to go
,
and trusted my experience within expanded consciousness. My retention of the form of a physical body while within the Blink Environment might be an equivalent. My sense is that it can take a bit of time for the habits acquired during the physical experience to fade
,
whether those habits consist of holding a physical form or holding certain thought patterns that pertain to expectations and beliefs that help us function in the physical world. If individuals within the physical experience believe that
they’ll be met by an angel or saint upon
death of the physical body, then
perhaps upon death a
personality who inhabits the expanded awareness states will appear to those individuals as an angel or
saint to offer them
guidance. Or perhaps a real angel or saint exists and will meet them. If individuals expect to meet ancestors, perhaps ancestors will meet them.

My own understanding of death as a voluntary transition of consciousness chosen by the individual may have helped shape my experience. Having spent a good portion of my life trusting expanded awareness, I suspect that I may be more comfortable than some in owning myself as more than a series of firing brain synapses. Acting as my own authority, owning that as a law of being, my own beliefs likely shaped or informed my experience. After all, from an expanded consciousness perspective, it’s understood that belief—
thought
—creates
reality.

When I revisit this scene, the overall ambiance of equality and respect between all participants, noted in the previous chapter, is striking. A hierarchy of power is entirely absent, and no evaluative or punishing judgment is in evidence. Power and responsibility lie within oneself, in one’s own explorations of balance and creativity within the cooperative infinity of All That Is, the creative force of all being.

While I was aware of fulfilling an agreement to provide information to the individuals at the Gathering, I felt no sense of judgment applied regarding the way I carried out that obligation or responsibility. No self-evaluation took place regarding whether that had been a favor fulfilled well or executed poorly. It was what it was, and while I was pleased that the information was useful, I was also somewhat indifferent to the effect the information had on the personalities who accepted it. While having communicated some effects of my physical life—I was tired—I didn’t judge whether I was tired from doing good deeds or from struggling and failing to reach goals. It felt very much as if the only judgment rendered on my physical life might be my own evaluation of its merits, disappointments, triumphs, and uses.

Although a “life flashing before my eyes” evaluation didn’t take place at this time, the evaluative criteria against which my life’s actions might be weighed was available. The first criterion was whether my Whole Self, my
Beingness
, was expanded in depth and breadth in regard to understanding the nature of myself within all consciousness. This was closely related to the second criterion: expression of creativity. The third criterion was whether I enjoyed the experience as a whole.

Whether my sense of
Self
was expanded by this lifetime to date was actually a given, as all experience is assumed to expand awareness of the
Self
. Whether it added significantly to certain areas or in particularly exciting, unexpected, or novel ways seemed to be the emphasis for my own evaluation. Even in physical consciousness I enjoy unexpected or apparently bizarre juxtapositions, extremes of possibility, and finding things I’ve never imagined exist. Some of the other personalities present exhibited a structure or emphasis in their approaches to creativity that was entirely different from my
own, just
as a scientist and an artist in our physical world might approach the same object or action from very different point of view. Some of the personalities were drawn to methodically detailed progression, finding every detail of equal interest. Others were attracted by priorities of emotional intensity while others were attracted by priorities of what I’d describe as cerebral complexity.
Preferences in creating and organizing experiences were all accepted as valid. They are simply different paths that lead to the same outcome: enjoyment—the joy of playing with innate creativity.

The realization that enjoyment of an experience is a central criterion for the value of a life surprised me. In reflecting upon this scene, my agreement to fulfill the various requests of the personalities was based
purely
on my own sense of whether I would enjoy the proposed tasks: not
partially
based on my own sense of what would be fun but
wholly
. If I hadn’t thought that it would be enjoyable to fulfill the Gathering’s requests or that the tasks couldn’t be done within activities that would serve my personal interests, I know without doubt that I wouldn’t have agreed. And the sense I have is that no one would have minded had I said no. That decision would have been assumed valid and fully acceptable.

If something is not enjoyable, don’t do it
might seem an alarming concept in the context of the physical consciousness we know. Our base assumption, the structure upon which we rest our ideas of self, is that we are basically flawed. If we were free to do whatever we most enjoyed, it’s assumed that many would choose to do evil or disruptive, self-absorbed things. Chaos would ensue. What if someone most enjoyed killing people and spent a whole lifetime doing it? What if someone wanted to rape a neighbor, kill a sibling, rob a bank, or stage a coup? What if I didn’t want to apologize, or you didn’t want to go visit your sick mother.
We assume that if set free from social, religious, or and cultural constraints, we’ll be freeing base impulses, and those base impulses will likely be bad. Religion tells us we’re fundamentally sinners, and science tells us we’re fundamentally aggressive survivors. My experience in expanded
awareness environments, however, assures me that we’re fundamentally good, holy, cooperative, creative, and amazingly cool.

I was hoping to avoid a discussion of good and evil, as I could probably write another whole book in an attempt to explain what I experienced regarding this perceived dichotomy. The subject is fraught with all sorts of cultural and religious baggage that’s difficult to untangle, but it seems pertinent to try to explain, very basically, what I sensed about good and evil from an expanded awareness perspective. From a physical perspective it’s easy to end up chasing one’s own tail on this; I’ll try not to twist it into knots.

From the physical perspective, it’s appropriate to agree upon limits of behavior in order to create a harmonious collective experience. It may also be necessary because we’ve built our reality into a structure that discourages or overlooks personal understanding and consistent awareness of our Whole Selves (and so, our participation in All That Is) within our physical lives. Our judgments on behavior, then, are valid
from this physical perspective
and functional
only
within it. We try to curtail the actions of a burglar, a murderer, or a rapist, with good reason. It’s a judgment on the physical action, and an attempt to minimize detrimental effects on the general harmony of the physical world, our collective conscious experience.

From expanded awareness
every
action is understood to express creativity, have meaning, and influence the balance and order of the whole of All That Is. From my experiences in expanded awareness, it appears to me that
no being
is considered evil or bad.
Actions
of a being may be understood to be disruptive, inharmonious, or detrimental to the creative flow within any one reality, but the
creativity
of an action could be understood as valid—perhaps even necessary or useful—regardless of the overall disruption. Actions of a being may be understood as likely to look disruptive or evil from within a physical perspective while being considered beautiful, necessary, or valuable creative action from the perspective of expanded awareness and thus
good
in every way.

Here’s a simplistic (or simplified, though not necessarily simple) example. From our perspective, we’re generally unable to perceive or understand fully the roles that a Whole Self may choose to take on upon entering a body, but from expanded awareness it can be seen that someone may agree to act in a certain way in order to assist others in experiencing something. As outrageous as it may seem to our perspective in the physical, the man who built the bomb that blew me up may have performed that action at my own request. This is not to imply that because it was at my request, his actions are acceptable within the physical world and ought to be overlooked. The role may have been agreed upon in order for the bomber himself to experience what it’s like to be chased, arrested, detained, or killed for the violence he visited on others. The bomber’s actions don’t have to be condoned in the physical world because he and I as Whole Selves agreed to blow me up; we all keep playing our roles within the context of the physical (the collective reality that we as Whole Selves have chosen to focus upon and participate in) according to what we think is good and right.