Awakening (The Vampire Destiny Series Book #3) (27 page)

I’d willingly wait for him.  He was the love of my life, the man I’d been born for.  And he was the man that had been so special he’d been made for me twice.

An hour after I'd locked myself away, Anna and Lukas had broken down the door after I'd ignored their pleas for me to let them in.  I’d refused to acknowledge that they were there.  It wasn’t out of choice.   My mind screamed out to them to help me; however, my voice and body didn't want to cooperate.  Nothing could soothe me and nothing could console me.  The only thing that could put my heart and mind back together again was knowing that Stefan was safe.

But where could he be?  Was he trapped somewhere?  My phone calls to him went unanswered, the bond between us severed due to Amir’s ability.  His presence had been ripped from me, leaving behind a short-circuited, inadequate being that needed him back to be complete and whole again.

Stretched across the bed and gripping a pillow, I was a virtual prisoner in my mind.  It was during this time I figured out why every vampire was shocked at our bonding.  This was the real reason vampires didn't mate.  It had little to do with showing vulnerabilities and weaknesses as I’d first deduced.  Bonds were averted because it slowly caused the other to come undone if abandoned.  It needed us both actively participating in the connection to be complete, to thrive.  Take one away and its retribution was excruciating and debilitating.

I'd stayed curled in the fetal position on our bed.  They'd all taken their turns sitting with me.  I heard the pity in their voice.  I felt the fear in their emotions, breaking through my weakened shields.  They were as terrified as me.  The only difference is that they weren't bonded to the love of their life or had that precious link ripped violently away with no warning.

Finally exhausting myself, I'd drifted off into a fitful sleep.  In my dreamlike state, I was transported to a place I'd never been as a human, yet it seemed as familiar as my childhood home.  Before me stood the human version of Stefan, the one I’d seen from his forgotten memories.  He was absolutely stunning as a human man.  His normally pale skin was lightly tanned from his time by the sea, his golden blond hair was long and gleaming in the sunlight.  Tall and beautiful, he was walking along the edge of the sea, his blue eyes contemplative.  Instinctively I ran to him, attempting to embrace him.  My arms weren't able to make any contact with him.  They slipped through him as if I was a ghost and he continued on his trek totally unaware of my interference.

“Stefan!”  I yelled after him.  I was ready to sink to my knees in the sand when a familiar voice rang out.

"You are not real to this world.”

Spinning around, I found my mother standing in the sand, dressed in the same gauzy dress as during our first meeting.  Her long chestnut hair blew in the crisp, salty air.  She hurried to me and tugged at my arm, dragging me along behind her.  "You are watching something that has already occurred.  It is like watching a movie."

"Mother?" I questioned.  I was happy to see her but totally confused as to why she’d chosen to come to me again so soon, especially at a time where I was so desperately worried about Stefan.  “Why are we here?”

"You needed to see.  You need to understand more of what you are," she advised cryptically.  "Come with me."

Clasping hands, we followed behind Stefan.  He stopped at a large rock and stared out to the sea.  Finally, his eyes closed and he began speaking quickly in another language.  It wasn't his normal modern Swedish, although it was similar.  He spoke so quickly, so softly that I couldn't have understood his words even if I understood the language.

"He is praying in Old Norse.  He is asking for guidance to the gods or goddesses that may be listening," Armes whispered.  She’d sensed my confusion and was offering her help.  She brushed my hair back delicately with two of her fingers.  "Watch."

The volume of his voice raised, the familiar timbre tearing at my heart.  The heart-wrenching supplications made my throat tighten with unshed tears.

“Skjarr kvikindi.  Hitta minn hlið síða.  Elska minn, dveljask innan minn fold.  Fá minn lífdagar, fagr víf,” he cried, stretching his hands to the sky.

“What did he say?  Please, I have to know.”

My mother laid her head on my shoulder, whispering softly in her melodic voice.  “Shy creature, come to my side.  Love me, stay within my world.  Take my life, beautiful woman.”

In the cold mist, a transparent figure materialized at his side until she became as solid as him.  Tall and willowy, her deep strawberry blond hair fell in waves over her shoulders.  Her filmy dress was as blue as the sea, her green eyes as dark as evergreens.  Looking away, I met my mother's gaze.  She was...

She nodded in answer to my unasked question.  "Yes, this was you in your other form.  Quiet, love.  You must watch."

Stefan opened his eyes and acknowledged the vision in front of him.  His soft lips curled up into a familiar smile and he opened his arms to her.

I watched in fascination as the other version of myself sank into his arms.  Her fingers combed through his long hair, her lips moving silently at his ear, whispering inaudibly.  His lips curled up at the corners, his eyes crinkled in laughter.

He was beautifully perfect even as a mortal.  And he loved this creature that was somehow me, but not.  It made no sense.

"See, he loved you even then.  He doesn't remember the love you shared then, Josephine.  The key for you both to remember is in the journals."

"What was I?" I stuttered.  “I obviously wasn’t human.”  Captivated by the scene in front of me,  I couldn’t tear my eyes away from observing Stefan as he threaded his long fingers through her hair, just as he had my own so many times.

"It is still part of what you are.  You simply took on a human form to be at his side when the time aligned properly, " Armes pointed out.  "Look how you comforted him even then.  You were with him until his human death, Josephine.  Eudaemons can only remain along with the living.  Once he became immortal, you had to leave him and he was forced to forget you until the time was right.  He had many lessons to learn."

"An Eudaemon?" My voice sounded shaky as my mouth stumbled over the words.  Garrett had a book with the entire section marked.  "I'm a daemon?"

"Only a third.  And it's not the negative thing you think it is.  You were his good luck, a welcome spirit.  Imagine yourself as a guardian angel of sorts.  He wished to discover a way to keep you at his side or to be allowed to remain with you."  Armes blue eyes almost seemed to see through me.  "Solveig was the vessel to make him immortal.  It took centuries for the preparations.  Stefan had to be ready to accept you.  You needed to be prepared to live as a human.  Your planned arrival set off a flurry of events."

"What kind of events?"

"Find the journals.  They will explain what I cannot, love,"  Armes sighed deeply.  "We must leave.  Our time here is over."

Grabbing my mother’s arm, I stopped her from turning away.  "Is Stefan alive?

She beamed angelically.  "Of course he is alive on this plane.  You can see him as clearly as I can."

My hand tightened on her arm and I exhaled deeply.  "Not here.  Is he alive on the plane I’m currently existing in."

"Love, saying he is alive is subject to opinion.  Technically he is dead."  She towed me along with her.  Shooting a quick glance over my shoulder, Stefan and the spirit version of myself had disappeared.  My mother and I were alone on the sand, the biting wind from the ocean ruffling our hair.  The salty smell of brine filled my nose, the salty spray dampening my hair.

My mother touched my cheek, her fingers as soft as silk on my skin.  "If the fates allow, he will return to you.  Trust destiny.  It brought you together for a purpose."

Another obscure answer.  "Mother..."

"Goodbye, love."

When I opened my eyes, Lukas sat watch over me from the end of the bed.  His refined face sagged with worry as he rubbed his hands back and forth nervously.

"What time is it?"  I mumbled, wiping my hand across my eyes.  Attempting to get my bearings back, I felt more tired now than before I fell into my restless sleep.

Lukas pushed his sleeve back and glanced at the watch on his wrist.  He heaved a defeated sigh and attempted to smile.  "It’s a little after 10pm.  Even though I’m happy to see you talking, you should go back to sleep."

"I can’t sleep.  I had another dream, Lukas.  I need to trust fate," I sat up on the bed cross legged and faced him.

"Fate," he snorted cynically.  "You make your own fate, sweet cheeks."

"He'll come back to me.  He didn't find me after 200 years for it end like this," I licked my dry lips.  "He's a fighter."

Lukas rested his forearms on his legs.  His head fell forward and his black hair obscured his eyes.  "You’re right, he is a fighter.  I'm just afraid."

I rested my hand gently on his shoulder.  "You?  What are you scared of, Lukas?  If anyone can make it out of there, he can."

His blue eyes peeked through the inky darkness of his hair.  "I’m scared of being alone. Or what will happen to you if he doesn't return.  The bond...it's stronger than you.  Without him, you won't survive it."

I gave his shoulder an affectionate shove.  "Hey! He'll be back.  There’s no need for you to worry your pretty little head about me going anywhere.  Trust in him."

His head snapped up and the heaviness from his eyes lightened.  His hand clasped mine and we sat in a companionable silence, listening to the muffled sounds of Anna and Nikolaus in the living room. 

"Tell me about your dream.  I want to hear it if you feel like telling me.”

His voice startled me.  I scooted closer until I sat at his side, so close our legs were touching.

“I have a question for you first.”

Lukas twisted his mouth into a smirk.  “Of course you do.”

“You were in here with me the entire time, right?  I never left the room?”  I asked quietly.

“Not only did not leave, you didn’t move.  I could’ve sworn you were dead.”

Taking a deep breath, I plunged in.  "In my dream, I saw Stefan as a human man.  And I was with him.  I was me, but not me.  And my mother was with me.  She told me to trust fate.  It's all sort of confusing."

Lukas sat quietly,  listening to me rattle on.  He gave me an inquisitive stare.  "What the hell are you?  You're not just a human and vampire hodge podge mixture.  What else are you?"

Closing my eyes, I swallowed roughly.  "An Eudaemon."

A black eyebrow arched.  He pursed his lips as he considered my words.  "A guardian spirit or a bringer of good luck.  His vision..."

"Was probably just a memory of me.  We both need to remember the past.  And I need my uncle's journals to help learn how to do it," I murmured.  "Do not tell Anna or Nikolaus about any of this.  I need to talk to Stefan first."

Lukas nodded and he finally released my hand.  Standing, he gave me a weak smile.  "You’re different now.  Stronger.  I envy you, Josephine.  You’re not afraid to love, at least not anymore.  Life had gotten boring until we found you.  And it keeps getting more interesting with each passing day."

I was preparing an entertaining retort when the sudden reemergence of Stefan in the bond reignited, stopping all coherent thought.  The pain that had hovered in my chest for hours lessened, replaced by the renewed force of the tie between us.  I felt alive again with his essence slowly pumping through my veins, his magical blood reigniting the part of me that was slowly fading without him.

"Josie?  What’s happening?"

Pushing by Lukas, I hurried down the hallway and almost ripped the locks off of the front door.  Flinging it wide open, I found myself face to face with the man I'd feared I'd lost.

It was Stefan.

His six-foot-four frame was covered from head to foot in soot, blood and grime.  His golden blond hair was matted and dark smears of dirt marred his handsome face.  Ignoring the filth, I launched myself into his arms, burying my face into his chest, grabbing handfuls of his ruined shirt into my fists.