Awakenings - SF1 (57 page)

"I...I think so. I mean in one way I've been ready since the first time I saw you in class. I find you incredibly attractive and extremely desirable," she lifted Tracy's hand and gave it a gentle kiss. "But I made you a promise and I want to be sure we're both aware of where we stand. I feel close to being able to make a commitment but I'm not quite there," Ryan admitted.

"I'm not very interested in standing tonight, or tomorrow for that matter," Tracy replied with a leer. "I want to take you home and not let you out until school starts."

"But that's two weeks!" Ryan squeaked.

"I know," she whispered. "It'll take me that long to love you thoroughly."

"But I have to be home for the football games tomorrow," Ryan replied lightly in a partial tease, just trying to break the sultry mood.

"There's plenty of time for football some other time, Ryan. But just to keep you happy I promise I'll have you screaming about my illegal use of hands," she promised as she slid her hand up Ryan's leather clad thigh, coming dangerously close to her inseam.

"I'd sure like to get my hands on your tight end," Ryan replied winsomely as she gasped a bit for a deep breath. She shook her head to clear it and said, "I was serious about needing to be home for football tomorrow, though. I thought it would be a good time to introduce you to the whole family."

"But I've met your family," she said. "We had dinner right before I left for Christmas, remember?"

"That was just my father and brothers," Ryan informed her. "Now you need to pass inspection from my uncles, aunts and cousins."

"How many are there?" she asked hesitantly.

"About 25. They'll all be at the house tomorrow."

"I...
I...
I'll let you know if I can make it," she said slowly. "I do have some things I need to get done tomorrow."

On New Year's Day? What could you possibly have to do on New Years Day?
Just to test the theory that was slowly forming in her head Ryan asked, "If I decide to skip the family party could I come over?"

"Sure," she said easily. "Any time. Or you could just avoid putting all those miles on your car and stay over."

"I don't think I'm ready yet, Tracy. I made a promise and until I'm ready to commit to you I don't feel right about it."

Tracy's hand was wandering up her thigh in the most alluring manner that Ryan had ever felt. "I release you from your promise," she purred. "Turn your vigilant little conscience off and follow your desire. It's okay if you don't love me yet...or ever for that matter. I just want you to take me home and love every little inch of me--slowly."

"Oh God," Ryan moaned weakly as she felt her resolve float away in a cloud of erotic thoughts.

After a solid 10 minutes of staring at Ryan
,
Jack finally turned his eyes to follow Jamie's. "Isn't that...?" he started to say but Jamie faced him again and leaned in for a kiss.

"Take me home," she begged. "I want to feel you inside me."

His eyes opened as wide as they were capable of opening and he completely lost his prior train of thought.
God he's easy
, Jamie thought to herself as Jack immediately leaned over to ask Jim if he was ready to leave.

Just as they were getting ready to leave the bar a couple that Tracy knew came in. "Don't even bother trying to get your car," they informed them. "There's a half hour wait."

Ryan hopped up and gallantly offered, "I'll go wait in line. Why don't you all have another drink and come down in a half hour?"

Tracy's friends handed Ryan their valet ticket and gratefully accepted her offer.

As she stood in the bracing cold wind Ryan felt some of her determination return.
I'm really not ready yet,
she thought.
I have to get to the bottom of this family thing. It might be my imagination but I get the impression that she's not interested in meeting and getting to know my family. And there's no way in the world I'll get seriously involved with anyone who doesn't like my family
.

The last drink was obviously the kicker since Tracy was sound asleep with her face pressed against the window of the truck by the time they reached the Marina. She was lucid enough to get in to her apartment but as soon as they hit the door she was on Ryan like a hungry dog on a bone. But now that Ryan had made up her mind the erotic temptation was quite a bit less than it had been in the bar. She lovingly undressed her friend with only a momentary desire to jump on top of her. After waiting for Tracy to finish in the bathroom Ryan guided her back to the bed. "Aren't you going to undress?" she asked hazily.

"I think these leather pants will feel really good against your skin," Ryan said softly. "Let's try it and see."

Tracy was obviously in the mood for a little experiment since she dropped face forward onto the bed. Ryan climbed on top of her thighs and forced herself to concentrate when Tracy let out a sexy low moan.
God she had a gorgeous body
, she thought as she fought to keep her desire at a manageable level. Ryan began to massage that gorgeous naked body; starting at her shoulders and slowly working her way down. By the time she reached her waist she heard the soft, deep breathing that signaled sleep. Leaning over her prone body she kissed her cheek and slid off her hips. She covered her with the sheet and duvet and carefully removed all of the pins that held her hair up. When she finished she ran her fingers through the silky tresses and thought,
I would love to have that hair trailing over my breasts right about now. But a promise is a promise!

As the days of winter break passed Jamie felt so close to leaving so many times that she lost count. The most frustrating thing was that her parents were absolutely no different than they had ever been. She felt like a blind person who has been given the gift of sight. She saw things that she had never seen before, in the interactions between her parents; in the way they treated her; even in the way they treated the staff. The insight was driving her crazy however, and she yearned to go back home to Berkeley. Seeing Ryan on Monday, Wednesday and Friday afternoons were the only thing that kept her sane.

She worked out with a frenzy in order to keep her mind off her family. She put in 2 or 3 hours of riding every day except Friday since she trained her legs that day. She had seen the nutritionist a few times, but she was so tense during this time that she continued to lose weight. She knew she was down lower than she had been when she fainted at the talk line, and she began to wear more modest work out clothes so that Ryan wouldn't notice.

She had to admit that Ryan was truly going out of her way to help cheer her up. After her workouts she took her over to the big empty parking lot of the local high school and patiently explained more of the intricacies of the motorcycle, allowing Jamie to ride the big bike for at least an hour each time. A week before break was over she surprised her by driving her over to the Department of Motor Vehicles and announcing that Jamie had an appointment to take her driver's test for her motorcycle license.

To her shock, she passed the test easily and after breezing through the written test she proudly displayed the temporary license to her beaming friend. "I'm proud of you," Ryan said fondly as she enveloped her in a generous hug.

"This was a wonderful gift, Ryan," Jamie said sincerely. "Spending your time with me and being so patient has really made me feel special."

"You are special," she insisted as she leaned over and kissed her lightly on her blushing cheek.

As she got ready for her ride on the Thursday before she was to leave Hillsborough she heard a knock on the door. Before she could reply her mother opened the door and came into the room. Jamie was only wearing her underwear and her mother dropped her jaw in pure shock. "My God, Jamie what have you done to your body?" she said in alarm.

"What do you mean?" she replied defensively as she grabbed her jersey and yanked it over her head.

"You know perfectly well what I mean," her mother replied sternly.

"I've lost some weight, but I'll put it back on soon," she replied, feeling very uncomfortable at this invasion of her privacy.

"That's not what I mean. Your weight is fine, Jamie, it's those muscles. You've done this intentionally and I want to know why," she stated firmly.

Jamie was baffled at her mother's behavior.
Now she's interested in me?
"I have been working out quite a bit, Mother. I'm going to participate in a big charity bike ride and I need to get in shape to complete it."

"That makes no sense at all, Jamie. What does riding a bike have to do with looking like this?" she accused as she pointed at Jamie's sinewy body.

"I need to be in good shape overall to be strong enough to ride 500 miles. I look a lot more muscular than normal because of the weight that I've lost," she said meekly.

"Do you mean to tell me that you plan on riding that bicycle of yours over 500 miles?" she nearly shouted. "I'll not have it, Jamie. That is a ridiculous feat to even attempt. There is no reason on earth for you to do that and I forbid you to even try."

Jamie was absolutely dumbfounded. She stared at her mother for a few long minutes. Neither woman spoke as the gulf between them widened perceptibly. Jamie simply turned and removed her jersey. She folded it and put on a t-shirt. She then began to pack up her clothes in silence.

Her mother stared at her back for a few minutes. "Jamie, I want your word that you will stop this nonsense right now."

"I can't do that Mother. I refuse to lie to you just to make you happy," she replied. "I make my own choices in life and this is a choice I have made that I intend to pursue. I would prefer that you support me, but I don't require it."

"Don't forget that we do support you
,
Jamie, quite well if I do say so myself. I believe we do have a right to express our opinions about your choices so long as you are our dependent."

She picked up her heavy suitcase and dragged it towards the door. "Mother, I appreciate your financial support, but we both know that I don't need it." She continued down the stairs, leaving her mother to stare at her in shocked silence from the doorway of her bedroom.

As soon as she was in her car she dialed Ryan's pager. Moments later she heard the reassuring tones over her cell phone. "Hi, are you going to be at home for a while?" Jamie inquired.

"Yeah, until 6 or so. I'm having dinner with Tracy. Why, do you want to come over?"

"Yes, if you don't mind. I just had a really bad fight with my mother and I need to talk about it," she replied shakily.

"I'll be waiting for you," Ryan replied.

When Jamie arrived an hour later she saw Ryan rollerblading down the street at breakneck speed.
I can't believe she can blade up these hills. I have trouble walking up them! Boy, I bet my mother would love her body.
"I think I understand why your father had to take you to the emergency room all the time if this is the kind of stuff you used to do," she chided her sweating friend.

"Actually, most of my injuries were from skateboarding," she related. "I used to go down to the financial district and zoom down all those cool plazas and walkways. He would have to come get me from the security guard's office and take me straight to the E.R."

"Did you hurt yourself badly?" she inquired.

"Mostly broken bones," she replied nonchalantly.

"Boy, my parents think I'm tough to handle," she shook her head in dismay at her cavalier friend.

They went down to Ryan's room, the house actually being empty for a change. Ryan took a quick shower while Jamie just looked at the pictures on the walls. She particularly loved the pictures of Ryan when she was a little girl. There were at least a dozen framed shots of her taken at various stages of her youth. Her favorite was one of her as a toddler, no more than 2 years old. She had the cutest little round face and with that shock of black hair and those crystal blue eyes she looked like a beautiful little china doll.

When Ryan came out, wearing a long sleeved red T-shirt and faded navy blue sweats, Jamie crossed the room and asked for a hug. Ryan responded quickly and Jamie just stood in the embrace for a very long time. "You're the only person I feel safe with anymore," she mumbled into the strong chest.

"Come over here and relax," Ryan said as she tugged her over to the bed. Ryan lay down first, scooting to the middle of the big bed. She pulled a couple of pillows behind her back to elevate herself, and then she held out her arm in invitation. Jamie gratefully accepted the offer and climbed right up next to her. Ryan wrapped her arm around Jamie's back, resting her hand on her hip.

"Tell me what happened," she urged.

"She came into my room and saw me in my underwear," Jamie said as though that explained everything.

"I didn't convert you to boxers, did I?" Ryan asked with a hint of levity in her voice.

"It wasn't the underwear--it was my body," she said as Ryan nodded her understanding.

"I remember we talked about this at the beginning. We talked about how Jack would feel but we didn't discuss her or your father," Ryan reminded her.