Baby Benefits (13 page)

But Isabella’s future happiness wasn’t the only thing at stake. If Derek let Isabella go—if he failed at this—he’d never forgive himself. Family was important to him. Raina knew that better than anyone. But perhaps more than that, he needed a child in his life. Someone fun and lighthearted. Someone who could help him reclaim a little bit of his own too-short childhood. Isabella could do that for him.

But only if he let her. So far, he’d approached fatherhood with such seriousness. He hadn’t yet found any of the wonder or joy in raising a child. And if Kitty had her way, he probably never would.

Before Raina could even consider how to fix things, Derek once again lowered the book.

“She’s only five months old. She can’t possibly understand what I’m reading to her.”

“Maybe,” Raina conceded, closing the magazine she’d been pretending to read. Ever since her discussion with Kitty the day before, she’d been trying to broach the subject of Kitty’s evil plan to dominate the world—or at least Derek’s life—but so far she hadn’t found a tactful way of saying, By the way, your fiancée is the spawn of hell.

Instead she said, “Research shows that early exposure to literature can dramatically improve a child’s language and reading skills.”

Derek frowned, but read another page before looking back up. “Did the studies say at what age—”

“Dex did it.”

Derek straightened a little in his chair. “Well, if Dex can read Dr. Seuss, then so can I.”

“Actually, I think Dex was reading Jane Austen. Emma, maybe. Derek, I have a question about—”

“Jane Austen?” Derek sat forward, indignation written clearly on his face. As he spoke, he gestured with the book. Isabella waved a hand in the air, reaching for it. “Dex got to read her Jane Austen and you have me reading her ‘Left foot, left foot, left foot, right’?”

“Look at her, she loves it. It doesn’t matter what you read. Just that you’re reading.” Raina sucked in a deep breath, ready to try again. “About Kitty—”

But before she could get her question out, Derek stood, dropped The Foot Book on the empty chair and carried Isabella into the house.

Raina hopped up to follow. “It’s not a competition.”

But Derek ignored her. She caught up with him in the library, hovering in D’s between Dickens and Dostoyevsky. Isabella was propped on his hip, her tiny hands clutching his shirt, her head cocked to one side as she studied his face.

Raina’s heart fluttered in her chest. For the first time, he looked like a father. He looked at home with Isabella. Confident and relaxed.

Well, okay, as relaxed as he ever looked. He still bristled with barely contained energy. And of course his natural competitiveness had been piqued. He was reaching for Crime and Punishment, when she pressed her hand against several leather bound spines to block his progress.

“You can’t read her Dostoyevsky.”

“You said it didn’t matter what I read. That she’d enjoy anything.”

“I meant anything you enjoyed reading to her. No one enjoys Crime and Punishment. Not college students and certainly not infants.”

Derek’s spine stiffened defiantly. “I enjoyed it.”

“No, you didn’t.” The big liar. “You haven’t read a novel in years. You read Business Weekly, Time and occasionally those abbreviated versions of popular business books they publish for busy executives.” He looked ready to protest, but she didn’t give him a chance. “And don’t try to read any of those to Isabella, because she won’t enjoy them any more than you do.”

She ran a finger down the row of D’s until she found what she was looking for. “If you insist on reading her one of the classics, try this one.” She plopped her favorite Sherlock Holmes novel into his hands. “It’s pretty short and I think you’ll like it. And will you please just listen for a second?”

“Sure.” Derek nodded absently to her as he read the spine of the book then flipped it open to the first page.

“I was just…The thing about Kitty is…” Damn it. How did you tell someone they’d made a colossal mistake? Particularly someone who never made mistakes? Finally, she blurted out, “Derek, you don’t like New York, do you?”

He didn’t even glance up, his attention apparently already focused on the book. “I don’t think I’ve ever read it.”

Suppressing a groan of frustration, she clarified, “The city, not the book. I’d just gotten the impression that you didn’t particularly like it there.”

“New York’s fine,” he said distractedly, jostling Isabella to his other hip. “I like the hotel you usually book me at, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“The Plaza? Yes, people usually do like it. But you wouldn’t want to live in New York, would you?”

This warranted a look up. “Live in New York? City? Why would I live there? Corporate headquarters are here.”

She didn’t know whether to be relieved or worried by his answer. “You do have an office in New York,” she pointed out.

“Just a satellite office. And it’s our smallest one.” As if she didn’t know more details about the office than he did. “What’s this all about?”

She hesitated, just shy of spilling the beans about Kitty. But wasn’t that something he’d have to figure out for himself? When this week was done, she’d be out of his life. Why continue to be a go-between for him and Kitty? She didn’t work for Kitty and she owed her nothing. Sure, Raina wanted to make sure Isabella was protected, but that wasn’t her job, either. Not really. She wasn’t part of the family. Dex and Lucy would step in if they needed to. If Derek yielded to Kitty’s wishes. And frankly, if that happened, Raina would be thankful she wouldn’t be here to watch. “Just curious,” she mumbled. “I thought maybe you’d been thinking about moving corporate headquarters there.”

“I would never do that. New York is too expensive to house headquarters there. It would cost a fortune to move everyone there. It’s out of the question.”

“That’s what I thought.” But he’d already taken the book and Isabella and headed out for the patio again, leaving her alone in the library.

She stood in the empty room, staring at the doorway through which Derek had just disappeared, fuming. “Well, crap.”

He’d sworn he’d never move to New York. And she recognized all his reasons as perfectly logical. Yet she knew Kitty would not be swayed by mere logic. Yesterday, Kitty had made it clear she had no intention of living in Dallas, let alone raising Isabella as her own.

Since he was seventeen, every decision he’d made had benefited Messina Diamonds. And it wasn’t just about success in business or making money, but rather because he saw the company as his family. Why wouldn’t he? Until his father had died just over a year ago, the three Messina men had worked side by side to make the company a success.

If he married Kitty, best-case scenario, she’d be an awful mother to Isabella. Worst-case scenario, she’d bully him into giving her up to Dex and Lucy. Though, now that Raina thought about it, at least that way Isabella would be raised by loving parents. But she knew Derek well enough to know he’d never forgive himself if he didn’t raise Isabella himself.

The worst part was, Raina knew Derek would be torn. He saw marrying Kitty as the best thing for Messina Diamonds. But he didn’t know yet that she planned on moving him away from company headquarters. Yes, they could relocate to New York, but at what cost?

True, Derek probably wouldn’t cave to Kitty’s pressure, but then she’d just make his life miserable in return.

Why does it matter? part of her asked. He’s a grown-up. He can take care of himself. Plus, he’s unknowingly stomped all over your heart. Why do you even care if he’s miserable?

But she did care. And if she walked away from him now, if she let him make this huge mistake, she’d never be able to forgive herself. She’d cared about him for too long to simply walk away when he needed her most.

“I just can’t let you do it.”

At her announcement, Derek looked up from the book he’d only just opened. He’d already returned to his chair in the shade by the pool. Isabella, nearing her naptime, had settled back against his chest, her eyelids drooping.

“You can’t let me read The Hound of the Baskervilles to Isabella?”

He hoped he’d misunderstood, because he was curious to know what kind of book Raina had picked out for him. Besides, she was right. It had been years—decades maybe—since he’d read anything for pleasure.

For a moment, Raina just stared at him, her hands propped on her hips, her brow knitted in confusion. “No. I…I just told you to read that to her.”

“I know.”

“I mean, I can’t let you marry Kitty.”

“Is this about the kiss?” He looked down at the book before slowly closing it.

Raina snapped her mouth shut. Her cheeks flushed an alluring shade of pink before she answered. “No. This isn’t about that.”

He studied her, taking in her pursed lips and the flash of her eyes. Perhaps inevitably, he was flooded with the memory of what it had been like to kiss her. To tap into that passion and heat she’d hid from him for so long.

“We should probably talk about that.”

“No!” But her answer came too quickly.

“We shouldn’t. It was a mistake. I haven’t given it a second thought.”

Her lie couldn’t have been more obvious if he’d hooked her up to a polygraph machine. Obviously she hadn’t had any more luck forgetting their kiss than he had. And he’d certainly tried.

“This isn’t about…” Verbally she fumbled. “About that. This is about Kitty and how she’s completely wrong for you.”

He let her change the subject only because he wasn’t sure talking about the kiss would do him any more good than thinking about it had. Wanting one woman while you were engaged to another was damn inconvenient. Having both of them in his home, along with Isabella, had nearly induced an aneurism. Which might actually be less painful to endure.

“You claim you want to have a real relationship with your daughter,” Raina continued. “It’s important enough to you that you bargained away the last two weeks of my employment so I could teach you how to be a good father.” Her voice rose sharply as she spoke, crackling with emotion. “But none of it is going to matter if you marry Kitty, because she’s going to be a very bad stepmother.”

“She’ll learn.”

“No, Derek. Unless you’re hoping she’ll learn to be a different person.”

“You’ve made it pretty clear you don’t like Kitty.”

“It doesn’t matter whether or not I like Kitty. The question you should be asking yourself is if you like Kitty. For that matter, when you asked her to marry you, did you even know her?”

But before he could say anything—or even give her question much thought—Raina continued. “Oh, I’m sure this all seemed like a good idea at some point. I’m sure that finding the perfect wife and getting married was all part of your five-year plan.”

He cringed. Because marrying Kitty Biedermann actually was part of his ten-year business plan. The perfect bridge between opening the diamond-cutting branch in Antwerp and growing the market for those diamonds.

She must have noticed his response, because her gaze narrowed in annoyance. “Just forget about your plans for a minute, which I know will be hard for you. Trust me, I know how much you love to plan things out. I’ve spent the past nine years of my life making sure your plans worked out the way you planned them.”

“Raina—” he began, surprised by the resentment tingeing her words, but she cut him off.

“Marriage shouldn’t be a business decision. You’re joining your life with hers.”

Somehow, Raina managed to sound vehement rather than bitter. The strength of her conviction made him think. What would it mean to join his life with another’s, as Raina so poetically put it?

What would it be like to have that one person he trusted completely? That person he saw every day? Who challenged him without being antagonistic? Who always had his best interests at heart?

And yet, when he tried to picture that person, Kitty wasn’t who came to mind. Raina was.

Because, after all, wasn’t that what he had with Raina already?

Ten

“You think I’m silly, don’t you? That I’m being overly romantic?”

The idea that Raina might be his perfect wife startled him into answering honestly. “No, I don’t.”

She blinked in surprise. “Well, at least you’re willing to admit it. Because I know you, Derek. I know in your heart you don’t just want a business merger. You want a real marriage. Like what your parents had.”

“My parents’ marriage was far from perfect.”

“I’m not saying it was. Just that they were well-suited for each other. Your father had this crazy idea that he’d find diamonds where no one else thought to look for them. And she supported him through everything. Years of living in near-poverty in remote locations. Dragging the family from place to place. She put up with it because she loved him.”

Derek thought of his parents and their relationship. His mother hadn’t just put up with it, she’d loved it, too. Before his mother had developed cancer, their lives had been one adventure after another. And when the disease finally picked her off, his dad had continued ferociously searching for diamonds, but he’d lost the joy in doing so.

Raina was right. His parents had been perfectly matched. Their life together was anything but conventional, but their love for each other had been the glue that had held the family together.