Back to the Top (Ross Records) (3) (11 page)

I paused, not sure how much I should tell her. Although several hundred miles separated us, she was still one of my best friends. “Brad was not happy. He was embarrassed that I hadn’t told him that I knew Jake and the other guys.”

“I’m sure,” she snorted. “He’ll get over it.”

“He doesn’t want me to see them anymore,” I whispered.

“So? Who the hell is he to tell you what you can and can’t do?” she asked.

“He’s about to be my husband.”

“Bella,” she sighed. “You don’t love him. Why are you with him?”

“I do love him,” I said, but I didn’t even convince myself.

“Yeah, okay,” she said. “I’d sure love to see you and Jake reconcile. He made you the happiest I’d ever seen you.”

“That’s not going to happen.”

“But you want it to, don’t you?” she pressed.

“I don’t know.”

“Maybe you should spend some time with him as friends and see how you feel,” she said.

It was an excellent idea, but I wasn’t sure that I had the guts to try. What would it matter, anyway? I was going to marry Brad. End of story.

I changed the subject to something safer. We talked for about twenty more minutes before ending the call.

I went to bed early that night, tossing and turning for an hour. Finally, I gave up and gave in to what I really wanted. I retrieved my cell phone from the charger on my night stand and called Nick’s phone.

I’d go see Jake one more time – and then I would truly move forward.

***

As I drove Friday afternoon, guilt niggled the back of my brain. I definitely shouldn’t be taking the trip, but I was weak when it came to Jake. I told myself over and over that I’d have a long talk with him and get the closure I so desperately needed and then I could continue with my life. Maybe Jake could get a little closure, too.

It was all a lie, plain and simple. I wanted to see Jake. I wanted to spend time with him. It was wrong, and I knew it, but at that moment, driving down the two lane highway with the music blaring, I could care less.

Maybe I was trying to relive my youth or relive that summer that had promised to be magical. Stupid and impossible, sure, but I’d hold onto any excuse just to see Jake again.

Once I pulled up to the gates, all the doubt and guilt fled. I pushed the buzzer and grinned when Nick answered.

“Yeah?”

I’d planned some sort of witty response on the drive over but nervousness made me draw a blank.

“It’s me,” I said.

“Come on in.”

The gates opened and I proceeded up the drive, past the luscious green grass to the open pole barn. Parking, I spotted Nick and Jake inside the barn, working on an old car.

“Thinking of trading the drums and guitars in for wrenches and screwdrivers?” I asked.

“Yeah, sure,” Nick said, pecking my cheek.

“Hey, Iz,” Jake said as he wiped his greasy hands on a shop rag. “How do you like my new car? Just got it at an auction the other day.”

“It’s kind of junky, isn’t it?” I asked, nose crinkled.

“Iz!” Nick admonished. “It’s a ’69 Camaro.”

“And?” I asked. I knew old, restored cars were cool to a lot of people, but I just didn’t get all the hype.

“We’re doing most of the engine work,” Jake said. “Nick has a buddy that’s going to do the body work. It’s going to be a beaut when it’s finished.”

“Couldn’t you just buy one?” I asked.

Jake rolled his eyes while Nick scoffed.

“The point is to do the work yourself, angel,” Jake explained.

My heart lifted. He hadn’t called me ‘angel’ in a long, long time.

“Well, you guys finish up what you’re doing,” I said as BK trotted into the barn, tennis ball in his mouth. “I’ll play with the dog.”

“We’re about done for the day,” Nick said. “Then we’ll fire up the grill.”

Later, after they’d both showered and changed, we sat on the deck, eating burgers and potato salad, BK sitting at our feet, waiting for a scrap to fall.

“So, what did we do to deserve the pleasure of your company this weekend?” Nick asked as he downed the remainder of his burger with a soda.

“Nothing,” I said, avoiding their eyes. “Just wanted to get away.”

“Where’s Loverboy?” Jake asked.

“Does it matter?” I responded, shooting him a dark look.

“He must be out of town,” Jake said, smiling at Nick. “What’s that saying – when the cat’s away the mice will play?”

“You calling me a mouse, Jacob?” I asked.

He winced. “Don’t call me Jacob. Isabella.”

“Don’t call me a mouse.”

“Enough, children,” Nick interrupted. “Who cares why she’s here. Let’s just enjoy the weekend.”

“Amen, brother,” Jake said.

We sat outside talking until it grew late. When we decided it was time to retire, Jake retrieved my bag from my car and took it to the guest room. After I changed into a t-shirt and shorts, I didn’t bother with the pacing or the soul searching. I went straight across the hall and knocked on the door.

Nine

“Come in, Iz.”

I pushed open the door to find Jake sitting up in bed, dressed only in an old pair of gym shorts, one arm behind his head and the other extended, holding the remote control.

“I couldn’t sleep,” I said, in a lame attempt at an excuse.

“Come over here and we’ll watch a movie or something.”

His smile was maddening, like he’d known that I’d be knocking on his door tonight. I couldn’t fault him. I guess I’d known all along that I’d be knocking, too.

I climbed up beside him and he draped an arm over my shoulder.

“This isn’t an attempt to seduce me, is it?” he asked, a teasing glint in his eye. “I still mean it – while you’re wearing that ring, we can’t do anything.”

“I know,” I sighed. “I just wanted to be with you.”

“Remember the night we met?” he asked. “How we sat on the hood of the car all night and talked?”

“Yeah,” I said as a dreamy smile encompassed my face. “I remember.”

“You sure have changed,” he said. “You were shy one minute and then full of fire the next. Now you’ve matured.”

I lifted my face to give him a questioning look. “Is that a bad thing?”

“Not at all,” he said, squeezing my shoulders. “Not that there was anything at all wrong with you before, but you’ve changed in good ways.”

“So have you,” I said as I nestled into his side.

“Well, I’m not sure about that,” he mused. “I mean, maybe I have, but I took the long road. The wrong road.”

“But you made it eventually,” I said. “How are you doing with all of that?”

“Good, Iz. Real good,” he said. “I have my moments but they’re becoming fewer and farther in between.”

“I’m really glad to hear that,” I said. “I was worried about you.”

“No need,” he said as he flipped through the channels.

It was nice being like this with him. It reminded me of when we’d first met and had become friends. Maybe that’s what I needed at this moment – Jake’s friendship. I wasn’t sure what to do about Brad, but I did know that I wasn’t going to let him tear me away from Jake and the rest of my friends.

“You can crash here tonight if you want,” he said, placing a chaste kiss on the top of my head. “But this is all it can be. You know that, right?”

“Yes,” I said, as my eyes drifted shut. And it was enough for me. I just hoped that it was enough for him.

***

A window-rattling clap of thunder followed by an intense flash of lightning startled me out of sleep. A horrendous crash vibrated the entire room, making me sit straight up in bed. It was darker than the deepest depths of the ocean and I couldn’t see the clock.

Jake’s arms wrapped around my waist as he pulled me closer.

“It’s just a storm, Iz,” he mumbled in a voice that instantly reminded me of a tired child. “Go back to sleep.”

I snuggled into him, burying my face in his chest in an attempt to block out the storm, but the noise continued. The wind howled, wrapping around the house like a blanket as the thunder continued to boom, sounding like an explosion.

A knock on the door caused Jake to turn away from me and sit up.

“Yeah?”

“Jake?” Nick called as he opened the door, sticking a candle into the room. “Dude, you up?”

“Yeah, come in,” he said, tossing his legs over the side of the bed. “What’s wrong?”

Nick’s face was drawn in the candlelight and he either wasn’t surprised to see me in Jake’s bed or was too polite to comment.

“A tree fell outside,” he said. “It’s hard to tell because it’s so dark, but I think it fell on the gate.”

“Son of a bitch,” Jake said as he stood up. “Bring that candle in, would you?”

Nick did, flashing me a weak smile as Jake located his shirt on the floor and jerked it over his head.

“It’s really bad out there,” Nick said as I crawled out of bed and stood next to him. “Worst storm in ages.”

“Yeah,” Jake said as the storm raged around us, pelting the windows with hail, rain pouring on the roof, and lightning providing momentary flashes of light. “Let’s go check it out.”

“Jake, what are you thinking?” I asked as I scurried behind them, clutching the back of Jake’s shirt as Nick led us down the stairs.

“Nothing, Iz,” he said as we reached the kitchen and he rummaged through a drawer, finding a flashlight. Turning it on, the beam was a little weak but provided much needed light.

Walking to the window, Jake peered through the curtains, squinting his eyes with every flash of lightning.

“Hard to tell,” Jake said. “I can’t make out the gate from here.”

“Bet you’re wishing you would have listened to Greta and bought that generator, huh?” Nick grinned. “You’d be able to turn on the floodlights.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jake said, trying to shine the flashlight out the window. “I’m going to have to do that before winter, though. I’ve been lucky so far but man would it suck to lose power when it’s twenty below.”

I wrapped my arms around my waist, wincing with every loud boom.

“Well, I can’t tell,” Jake said, turning to face the living room. “Nothing I can do about it tonight, anyway.”

Relieved, I sank to the sofa.

Jake looked at me, cocking his head. “Where did you park?”

“By the pole barn,” I said. “Why?”

“Oh, hell,” he said, running a hand through his hair as he turned to Nick. “Dude, can you help me open the garage door? We’ll have to do it by hand.”

“Yep,” Nick said.

I jumped to my feet. “What are you thinking?”

“I need your keys, Iz,” he said as he located his shoes and slipped them on his feet.

“No,” I said. “You’re not going out there.

“They’re here,” Nick said, in the doorway, shining his candle into the kitchen. “On the counter.”

“Jake, it’s just a car,” I said.

“Yes, Iz, I know,” he said as he walked into the kitchen, snatched the keys off the counter, and headed for the garage door, me right behind him. “But there are a lot of old trees out there and it would be a bitch for you to try to explain to Loverboy why your car was crushed. Especially if he asked where it was parked.

“So?” I said, clutching Jake’s arm. “I’ll figure it out.”

“I’ll just run out to the car and pull it into the garage,” he said, gently prying me loose. “No big deal.”

The determined look on his face told me that he was not going to budge. He was determined to do it. Sighing, I stepped back and watched, heart in my throat, as he rushed through the garage, Nick on his heels. Feeling as if I should do something, other than listen to the dog whining from somewhere in the house, I ran to the downstairs bathroom and retrieved some towels. When I returned, I felt my way through the dark living room until I made it to the window. I couldn’t see a thing until the headlights I swept the yard and my car was pulling into the garage. I hurried to the garage door, mindful of the darkness and the furniture that I couldn’t see, and handed towels to both men as soon as they stepped into the house.

Jake smiled his thanks as he rubbed his dripping hair with the towel. Rainwater streamed off his body, puddling at his feet on the ceramic tile floor.

“I got a look at the gate,” he said to Nick. “I turned the car that way with the headlights on and it looks like that old maple tree is on the gate.”

“Damn,” Nick said, running the towel down his arms. He was hardly wet at all. “Good luck trying to get that thing removed this weekend.”

Jake shrugged. “Matty’s uncle owns a landscaping company. Maybe they can help.”

“Jake, you need to put dry clothes on,” I said.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said with a wink. He jogged up the stairs to change while Nick and I sat in the living room, watching the lightning flash.

“Iz,” he said quietly. “You know that I love you, right? I think the world of you.”